Craving ... Love?

PrincessLynn2010

I lost my fiance last year, and spent this past year eating my pain. I put on almost 35 pounds. My asthma got worse. My blood pressure rose higher.
Well, I've only just begun the task of losing this weight. It's only been a week, but I've lost 4.5 pounds. I want to keep going but my depression is rearing its head & I'm feeling that loss and my alone-ness. All I want to do is jump in my car and go buy some foods that will make me feel better. Is there ANYONE out there with this same problem? I know if I eat my pain I will hate myself afterward. What am I doing to myself?! I feel so rejected and alone.

L1zardQueen

Hi and welcome!

Yoga or a good fast paced walk when I get bluesy.

Hugs

caiteh86

Hi there

I think I know how you're feeling. I lost my boyfriend last March, had to move out of our home, and then 3 months later I lost my job. Needless to say, it was the hardest time of my life and I was feeling extremely depressed. I spent the entire summer trying to ignore my pain by drinking sugary alcoholic drinks on a boat and eating fast food. It was a great summer all things considered, being on and near the lake, going for walks on the beach, etc really helped me in a lot of ways... but stuffing my face and drinking my pain away was not what I really needed.

By the time I decided to weigh myself at the end of October, I wanted to cry. I was overweight to begin with... and I had put on a good 10lbs since March. In November, I decided to start counting my calories and I joined a gym and got into heavy lifting. It is completely amazing what lifting has done for my spirits... it's helped so much with the sadness and depression I was feeling (and still do feel at times), and has boosted my confidence and made me feel SO powerful. Gaining control and being more conscious about what I'm putting into my body has helped immensely as well... I want to heal my body, mind and spirit by feeding myself nourishing foods. I still have a drink or junk food here and there, but the difference now is moderation... I just make sure not to overdo it, and fit it into my calories for the day/week.

It sounds like we've both had a really rough year and have been through a lot. Making the decision to look out for myself for once in my life, and treat myself like a friend who I'm trying to help heal through a horrible time, has been a game changer. Instead of going out and drinking every weekend, I'll take my dog for a hike or walk on the beach (even in the winter), meditate, diffuse some essential oils and read a good book. All of these things have added up in a big way. I still have feelings of loneliness and feeling rejected... I've tried to date recently and it hasn't gone well, I'm also in the middle of a job search... but I realize that the only thing you can control in life is how you respond to it, and I'm learning to let go a little bit and stay open to what the universe has in store for me.

Sorry for rambling... hopefully some of what I said helped. Congrats on your weight loss so far... sticking to your new lifestyle will be the best thing you could ever do for yourself, I promise.