My slowest 10k

samthepanda

In January a friend and work colleague died suddenly of a stroke. She was fit, active, not overweight. It was such a shock. She really encouraged me when I started jogging and we did a Race for Life together so when I saw an advert for a 10k for the stroke association it felt like the right thing to do. I do jog regularly , never fast and normally about 5k with a running partner. The weather has been awful so I haven't got out as much as I'd hoped. Last weekend I had a nasty stomach bug, and I'm still feeling rough, so all in all it wasn't good preparation!
I always knew today would be emotional. I have anxiety issues too, so going to do the run on my own was a big thing for me.I wasn't sure what to expect at the run as I didn't know how many people were taking part.
So event day dawned and I still felt rough. However on a plus side the weather was better than predicted (it was predicted for wind and rain). Turned out to be a smaller event than I expected - about 300 people, some doing 5k some 10k. The course was around the racetrack, so the 5k did a full lap, then part of a lap then double back to the start (now the finish) I was there in plenty of time,so headed for a toilet stop - I think most of the entrants were in the queue! By the time I got back it was time for the start, but a random song on my iPod made me really emotional and I started the run in tears. I managed 3k before I had to slow to a walk because I had stomach cramps. It was very demoralising to see the first 5k runners coming in to finish when i still had a long way today. I carried on though running and walking, there was a woman about 10 yards ahead doing the same, and I tried to keep her in my sights. Just into lap 2 someone shouted my name and I saw a friend from scouting cheering me on which was a real boost. The end of lap 2 was really hurting. I was determined to keep running through the start/fi ish point (where all the spectators were) but I felt very sick. I heard my name again - hubby and daughter had arrived to cheer me on! That made me cry again. Lap 3 is a blur, and finally I just had the last section to do. I was determined to run the last section, but boy it hurt! I fell over the line and cried and cried. I cried because I felt so rough, I cried for my friend, I cried because this was the first 10k I had done on my own and despite all the voices in my head telling me to stop I kept going, I hadn't let my anxiety win. Someone kept asking me if I was OK and often when it feels people are worried about me that increases my anxiety. Apparently I looked awful and they were about to call the first aiders! I managed not to panic though and eventually managed to get up.
It wasn't my fastest time by a long shot but I'm not disappointed. I did it.

L1zardQueen

You did amazing! I’m sure your friend would be proud of you

Whey125

Congratulations, you did an awesome job. Your friend must be smiling down on you. Hugs!

girlwithcurls2

What an emotional day for you. When you have had a rest and can reflect on it, look at all of the good that happened. You did it. For yourself. In memory of your friend. Running, walking, it doesn't matter. What matters is that you broke through the anxiety and signed up. Then you followed through and completed it. The sheer weight of emotions must have made it so challenging, but there you are. Strong, resilient, capable of so much. Congratulations on so many levels. You deserve a hug

samthepanda

I was nearly 15 minutes slower than my fastest time (which was a couple of years ago) but it's ok. Thanks for the lovely comments.

saragd012

You did amazing, it sounds like you conquered quite a bit, both physically and emotionally. You should be incredibly proud of yourself!

Styggian

Amazing story, congratulations on finishing the 10k

lporter229

It's amazing what you body can do when your soul gives it the will. Congrats on an amazing accomplishment. What a fine way to memorialize your friend!

solieco1

What an amazing testimony to determination. You made me cry too. It's these kind of races that can be cleansing and healing and powerful even though you may not know it at the time! Well done and thanks for the inspiration!