Ladies Who Lift

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  • gratia8
    gratia8 Posts: 1 Member
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    The best thing I could do for myself, because anxiety was such a huge deterrent for me, was plan and visualize. Figure out prior to a session what the equipment looks like, where you think it's located and do research on what the workouts are supposed to look like. I'd write down my routine on my phone so I always had access to it on the fly. Then I found the meanest, loudest, most aggressive music I could stand and turned up my headphones BEFORE I walked in the doors. But even that wasn't always enough for me on busy days. A lot of times I mock my own anxiety when I start to feel it...I tell myself "Oh my god look at EVERYONE staring at me. I'm such a f*** up and so distracting that they can't even do their own workouts because they're so busy judging me!" Then I'd do what I never want to do and that's take a look around and 99% of the people in the weight sections are doing their own thing. They didn't even know I was in there. Once I saw the absurdity of my anxious thoughts and acknowledged that, I got to work. It also helps to notice your own feelings towards new people in the gym. 9/10 you have mad respect for the underweight girl, the overweight beer gut guy, the obese chick who is in there doing sh**. I guarantee everyone in there is either not noticing those people and focusing on their own goals for the day OR when they do take notice it only lasts .2 seconds and it's all respect. Peace and love girl...anything that is daunting enough to give you heart palpitations is your body's way of telling you that you must do that thing.
  • amyinthetardis1231
    amyinthetardis1231 Posts: 571 Member
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    I paid for a few sessions with a trainer to show me correct form, and let him know up front that I planned to do Stronglifts 5x5. We focused the training sessions on learning to deadlift, bench press, and checking squat form. Once I'd been in the weight area with him a few times, I felt better about going in on my own.

    And as others have said, many times the guys there don't really care that you're there. The free weights section of my gym is almost all men, but I've only rarely been given any trouble by anyone. The regulars who see me in there regularly are polite and even complimentary of my progression. I also wear headphones and resting lift face to discourage getting chatted up when I don't want to socialize. And also, agree with finding a quieter time of day to go, especially while you're getting comfortable. I work part time and am at home with my daughter the rest of the time, so I can usually go in the late morning when it's not too busy.
  • HoneyBadger302
    HoneyBadger302 Posts: 1,970 Member
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    I started with the dumbbells (for some reason I felt less weird about using them), and then the small pre-set barbells, but finally was lifting more than those came in and had to step up to the regular barbells.

    Having a set plan and exercises, already written down on my clipboard, means I'll go up and use those weights regardless of how intimidated I'm feeling that day.

    Funny thing is, other than made up feelings in my own head that I'm not "lifting enough" to "justify" using the "big boy" weights, there's never been a reason for me to feel like I shouldn't be there. No one at the gym has ever given me an actual reason to feel that way, so I know it's all self-inflicted.
  • quiksylver296
    quiksylver296 Posts: 28,442 Member
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    So, @meganjonesuk1, did ya go yet?!?
  • PowerliftingMom
    PowerliftingMom Posts: 430 Member
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    I was a little nervous at first because I was usually the only female in the free weight area but the powerlifters in my gym were really great. After they realized how heavy I could lift they started asking me to help spot lol. Most of them competed with the same Fed as me so we had a lot in common. It can seem intimidating but if you just go in and don't put it off, trust me, it will work out fine for you!
  • grace173
    grace173 Posts: 180 Member
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    I started a lifting program with a trainer at my gym and he has me lifting as heavy as I can but I have put up 5 pounds over the 6 sessions and I know it's not fat but I doubt its all muscle. Does putting on weight scare any of you ladies that are lifting or starting to lift? Maybe I shouldn't even bother weighing myself anymore!
  • Silkysausage
    Silkysausage Posts: 502 Member
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    grace173 wrote: »
    I started a lifting program with a trainer at my gym and he has me lifting as heavy as I can but I have put up 5 pounds over the 6 sessions and I know it's not fat but I doubt its all muscle. Does putting on weight scare any of you ladies that are lifting or starting to lift? Maybe I shouldn't even bother weighing myself anymore!

    No because my gain is slow and therefore has a reduced fat increase. You have to think about your goals, mine is to look like I have muscle so I have to inevitably put on the pounds.

    It's a means to an end as it'll all come off again in a cut.
  • Davidsdottir
    Davidsdottir Posts: 1,285 Member
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    Silkysausage wrote: »
    grace173 wrote: »
    I started a lifting program with a trainer at my gym and he has me lifting as heavy as I can but I have put up 5 pounds over the 6 sessions and I know it's not fat but I doubt its all muscle. Does putting on weight scare any of you ladies that are lifting or starting to lift? Maybe I shouldn't even bother weighing myself anymore!

    No because my gain is slow and therefore has a reduced fat increase. You have to think about your goals, mine is to look like I have muscle so I have to inevitably put on the pounds.

    It's a means to an end as it'll all come off again in a cut.

    I agree. If you do it slow enough, you won't even notice it. I've put on 10-12 lbs in six months and I honestly can't really tell. My body fat is still under 20%. My goal is to go slow enough that I'll recomp rather than cut at the end of my bulk.
  • smolmaus
    smolmaus Posts: 442 Member
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    I was a nervous wreck the first time I had to go pick up a barbel! But with my anxiety I was frequently a wreck anyway lol. I've found getting over that first hump made me more confident and less anxious in general.

    I think I'm the exception in that I have found myself drawing the wrong kind of attention as a lady who lifts, one guy sat and stared at me for a solid half hour on Sunday morning (ignored) and another man follows me around sometimes working on the machines/ benches adjacent to me waaay too often to be a coincidence and has come up to me mid-set 4-5 times now to ask inane questions about what I'm doing (he gets short sharp answers, I have headphones on, respect the code). It's a mark of how good lifting is for my self esteem that I'm not being scared away by this behaviour. It's pathetic and I just don't let it bother me.
  • JorrunFulhelm
    JorrunFulhelm Posts: 42 Member
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    You just gotta do it. Go in there with an attitude of "I'm here to work hard" and "Don't get in my way" and you will be just fine. The right playlist will also help you lift with confidence. I generally listen to Heavy Metal/Hardcore Rap/Techno when I am lifting. You have a program and it looks like you have laid good ground work....trust in your plan. You got this!
  • justjara123
    justjara123 Posts: 63 Member
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    I struggle with this, too! When I started out, I had my best guy friend come with me and teach me proper form. A lot of the time I just try to adjust my way of thinking as letting those guys lifting heavy encourage me to lift heavier than I’m used to as well. I both regret and am glad for it the next day.

    I learned to workout in the afternoon when less people in general are around (I’m a student and college students tend to choose afternoon classes). I think it makes it easier so you don’t have to fight someone over the weights or benches either. Otherwise, I just got used to being one of the only girls lifting without a trainer. The music helps. Best of luck!
  • Kadoober
    Kadoober Posts: 289 Member
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    I sat down with myself and had a little chat, and decided that I wasn't going to let my insecurities get the better of me. I made peace with the fact that I was going to feel like a big awkward dorkball the first few times, and just DID IT.

    Every one is there to do their own thing, no one is concerned about what you are doing (unless your form is crap, in which case you might get some helpful tips).
  • angmarie28
    angmarie28 Posts: 2,785 Member
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    I have major anxiety that keeps me from doing things like that, So I started going really early, when the weight room was empty until I got comfortable with what I was doing, then started going when others were in there sometimes, but I prefer it empty, then no one is using what I need to use.
  • Sakura_Tree
    Sakura_Tree Posts: 142 Member
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    I used to be a bit shy about this too but after a while you get more comfortable. I just went for it. At first i mostly used the weight machines but then worked up to freeweights/squat rack etc.. put some music in and don't look anybody in the eye and just pretend they aren't there. best of luck :)

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