How to feel less angry about overeating on a date? And to plan to not do it again?

kiela64

I ate so much on my date today. We got a reasonable lunch, but then movie snacks (I absolutely devoured them after first being like 'no I'll just have gum' and I couldn't make myself stop!) and then dinner. Again, I wasn't hungry, and then continued to nibble and ate possibly over half of the plate! Which was large enough for two, but still. So much food. And I don't feel stuffed. I feel normal/fine (which probably goes to show my 'normal' is too large).

I don't want my SO to have to change their habits to suit me. I don't want anyone to feel bad for eating. But I absolutely do not know how to control myself around these things.

I'm just sitting at home now feeling completely terrible about myself. There was a mirror in the restaurant and I just stared at my face while I ate, getting angrier and angrier. My SO noticed my mood changed too. I just could not stop eating even though I was telling myself the whole time to put the fork down. Same with the movie snacks. The whole time I kept saying to stop. And I couldn't

I wish I didn't feel this way. It's not my SO's fault and I shouldn't punish them by being out of sorts. I also think I shouldn't punish me either, but I am. I do however need to figure out how to like....Not Do That. Any suggestions would be welcome I don't know how.

malibu927

Plan ahead. If you have a date scheduled, eat a bit less over the days leading up to it so you can enjoy yourself and still be within your weekly goal. And if you’re going to a place with calorie counts posted, you can pick something ahead of time to fit your goals. And if all else fails, just make it a maintenance day.

serindipte

malibu927 wrote: »

Plan ahead. If you have a date scheduled, eat a bit less over the days leading up to it so you can enjoy yourself and still be within your weekly goal. And if you’re going to a place with calorie counts posted, you can pick something ahead of time to fit your goals. And if all else fails, just make it a maintenance day.

This. I lost 50lbs without ever feeling bad about having a night every week that I ate out as much as I wanted. I budget my calories over the course of a week, instead of a day. I eat lighter on other days, then enjoy myself on the days I'm going to eat heavier. There were some weeks that I went out twice. No problem. I planned ahead, made sure I had plenty of room and was even able to enjoy a Chinese buffet (though I did stop getting the rice because, really, it wasn't my favorite anyway).

If you're unable to stop yourself, that is a different issue and may be because you're depriving yourself of things you like or enjoy. If you avoid doing that, then you'll be more able to avoid the loss of control.

NovusDies

serindipte wrote: »

If you're unable to stop yourself, that is a different issue and may be because you're depriving yourself of things you like or enjoy. If you avoid doing that, then you'll be more able to avoid the loss of control.

And this. Educating yourself on what you want and need may part of the answer. I realize now that in the past when I have gone off script it was a natural and honest response to errors in my dieting judgement. I shouldn't have been angry with the eating I should have learned why and be more accommodating to what I needed and wanted. I thought, at the time, I was supposed to rely on willpower to overcome... boy was that wrong.

That is one of my rules this time around. Any day that does not go as expected is a chance to learn not a reason to be angry.

AtLeastOnceMore

My rule is: "If I fall, I fall - I don't spiral, I don't beat myself up, I don't play the blame game... I just get my *kitten* up and start again". It happened. So long as it doesn't happen all the time, it's not worth the agony. For me, being on keto means that I will 'fat load' before going out. It's not uncommon to see me chowing down on a chunk of cheese and a few pieces of bacon before going out for morning tea - I then don't feel like eating while I'm out. But if I go "damn, I need that coffee" or "that muffin is too good to turn down", then I get over it as soon as I can and get back on track. It's a stumble, not a jail sentence - don't beat yourself up so much. This is a marathon, not a sprint.

kiela64

Thank you ❤️

JessiBelleW

I think thit’s best way to stop being angry is to make a plan for next time!
So: could you hit the gym before lunch? Start out right.
Could you look on the web for a menu and pick something sensible? Could you drink a bottle of water before you eat, start to fill your tummy?

Could you pack special ‘movie snacks’? Your own low cal popcorn, which you can portion control? I always take a yogurt and some nuts.

What can you build into your life to help you stay on track?