I know what to do, but can't seem to actually do it

daniperszyk

For the past year I've has a lot of ups and downs nutrition and fitness-wise. I'm finally at a point where twice a week I do strength training with a trainer, and three days a week I do just cardio, 30 mins to 1 hour each day. However I can't seem to get the nutrition aspect right. I'm not really losing any weight any more, and I know it's because of my diet.

It feels like I know what I need to do (my trainer even gave me good macro numbers to shoot for, etc), but I can't seem to get myself to do them or stick to them. I don't even log on MFP consistently enough.

Anyone been here? What did you do? I'm getting really frustrated with myself, and end up giving up, eating three desserts in a day, and then saying "I'll start over <insert random day in the future>. Help?

concordancia

Go back to step one. Log everything. Next week is soon enough to worry about specific targets, this week, you need to commit to tracking.

patrickgroom2007

I’m assuming this only because I’ve been there. You want to see results right away and you might feel discouraged and kinda falling off track because you’re not? Don’t take that offensive I know that’s half of everyone problem that works out and counts calories and all that Jazz. Let me tell you that it takes a looooooooooooong time to get fit. Trust me. I’m in the gym 3 hrs a day after work even and I weight train and cardio. Nothing happens over night or even in a month. You might see fast results in the first month and then slowly start to taper off.

You cannot target body fat so if you’re trying to lose the tummy and just doing abs isn’t going to cut it. You have to lose everything else first. The gym can be very intimidating and I feel sorry for you women out there that have to deal with men constantly hitting on you or prowling over you while you try to workout. The only person who is going to motivate you is you. You have to want to be fit to be fit. It takes a lot of effort and a lot of time. No *kitten*. I watch different inspiration videos to get me motivated. Didn’t workout routine videos to keep my body from not getting used to what I do at the gym so you’re always keeping your body guessing. It is very smart.

Keep track of what you eat if you can. This is a huuuuuge motivator. The more you think about it the more successful you are going to be in the long run. This app will keep track of your macros as well.

You should be weight training even days you aren’t with your trainer. Cardio should be the last thing you do. Even if it’s just walking on an incline. Try not to grab the machine when you perform the cardio. This is not how we walk so don’t cheat yourself.

Feel free to message or comment if you feel like you need some motivation. Take care!

kommodevaran

This is a common gripe. But the concept is flawed. There isn't one "right" way to eat. Physically, you need a range of nutrients every day, and not too many calories over time. Mentally and emotionally, you need to eat food you like, and to make your own food decisions. That need is so strong that you'll - probably - reject my advice, ironically enough. When you eat enough, and what you like, you have the foundation for sticking to a healthy diet.

88olds

If thing to do is your food diary, I agree that’s the right thing. But if you don’t seem to know how to get it going and keep it going try this.

1 piece of paper, line down the middle. 1st column, all the reasons you want to keep your diary, 2nd column, the reasons you don’t.

Spend some time on it. Sometimes it takes awhile to get at the don’ts. But you’ve got your reasons, otherwise you’d be doing it.

When you have your 2 lists take a good hard look at the don’ts. What accommodations or deals can you make with yourself to make things easier for the part of you that’s resisting? Don’t take the attitude that your own resistance should just be run over and left in the ditch. It won’t go away.

An aside- I tracked for years with pen and paper. I did loads of research on the computer, but I found keeping the records on the computer a bit of a pain. Also, you don’t need to count macros to keep a diary. Macros seems to be an entire lifestyle. Maybe too much right now.

tirowow12385

So basically you gave in to your urges and went over your calorie budget, the solution is, don't go over it and I'm not trying to be a captain obvious but you asked how people do it, this is how I do it, two weeks later after not giving in and I stepped on the scale, I see results. It's worth it and more satisfying than going over your calorie budget.

NovusDies

tirowow12385 wrote: »

So basically you gave in to your urges and went over your calorie budget, the solution is, don't go over it and I'm not trying to be a captain obvious but you asked how people do it, this is how I do it, two weeks later after not giving in and I stepped on the scale, I see results. It's worth it and more satisfying than going over your calorie budget.

Alternatively I try and learn from a day of over-eating and realize those urges can be better controlled if I plan better and stay ahead of them. I can't speak for everyone but in the past when I have gone off script it was a natural and honest reaction to bad diet judgement. Relying on "willpower" sucks. Relying on keeping it simple and me happy is much easier.

To the OP: Forget the macros your trainer gave you. Only through trial and error can you determine what you need to get through the day under your calories with your appetite and cravings in check. If you need strategies on how to eat dessert more often ask for them here. I have seen plenty of posts from successful people who eat desserts on a regular basis if not daily. That is not something I have experience with as I only really want dessert a few times a year. That is not a judgement. Trust me, I gained plenty of weight to get where I was at my heaviest by eating everything but dessert.

88olds

Another touchy feely psych trick. Say this- “I won’t do it.” Can’t isn’t accurate. On some level you just won’t. Why not?

BTW I’m firmly in the weight loss happens in our heads camp.

LivingtheLeanDream

Weight loss is about eating at calorie deficit - the macros aren't even that important, I only track the protein myself. Eat at deficit and you will lose. So if you aren't already tracking your food intake, its time to start.

Dragonfly771

Have you tried pre-logging. You have to commit to only eating what you logged in but having your food choices already made can be helpful in getting on track.

NovusDies

88olds wrote: »

Another touchy feely psych trick. Say this- “I won’t do it.” Can’t isn’t accurate. On some level you just won’t. Why not?

BTW I’m firmly in the weight loss happens in our heads camp.

What you call psych trick I call being smart and taking the path of least resistance. I don't have to worry about "won't" or "can't" because I actively avoid putting myself in the situation where the question needs to be asked.

If running your diet like a drill instructor works for you, great!

Sabine_Stroehm

<YES, you need to be in a calorie deficit>
now,
You've gotten great advice here. Now you need to figure out what works with YOU.
Does a diet with pre-prescribed macros work with you?
Does just calorie counting work with you?
Does considering some foods off limits, or non-existent work with you?
Does exercising work with you?
Does calorie tracking work with you?
Does the drill sergeant approach work with you?
What works with you, your general personality etc.?

88olds

@NovusDies Drill instructor is exactly what I try to avoid. I don’t think it works for most people, or it doesn’t work for long. I lost weight because I made deals and compromises with myself. I was never able to just beat myself into submission. I don’t know who can.

But folks say stuff like “ I can’t stick to my plan.”
Generally because the plan is an austerity diet that just doesn’t appeal to them. Really somewhere inside is a voice saying “I won’t.” Try to cut a deal.

LivingtheLeanDream

.

Kelleygirl79

One day. That's all. Don't think about tomorrow or beyond. Pick one day, count what goes in your mouth, stick to your calorie deficit and GO TO BED A WINNER.

That is all! You'll be so proud to fall asleep thinking "I did it!"

Do that again, the next day.

daniperszyk

Thank you, everyone! Especially to everyone who said something along the lines of "it's not that you can't, it's that you WON'T", whoa. That really resonated. I think it's time to look at my priorities in life and figure out WHY I won't -- so thank you all for taking the time to post here so that I'd finally realize that. You all are the best!

OHammykins

I started off by making one change to my diet at a time, for example breakfast. I spent a few weeks making sure I was eating a breakfast that I liked and tasted good but that was also good for me. I only logged the breakfast at first and then once I was comfortable with that I changed a different part of my diet and added that to my logging.
I built this up over time so it didn't feel like an all or nothing effort. This meant that if I had a day where I over ate or ate something that I hadn't planned on, I didn't throw in the towel and give up completely.

Small changes now = big success later!! You just need to go at a pace that's sustainable for you.

ninerbuff

It's called "lack of commitment". Committed people will do what it takes if it's something they really want. You have to fix that yourself and the easiest way is just to be CONSISTENT with a routine.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

NovusDies

88olds wrote: »

@NovusDies Drill instructor is exactly what I try to avoid. I don’t think it works for most people, or it doesn’t work for long. I lost weight because I made deals and compromises with myself. I was never able to just beat myself into submission. I don’t know who can.

But folks say stuff like “ I can’t stick to my plan.”
Generally because the plan is an austerity diet that just doesn’t appeal to them. Really somewhere inside is a voice saying “I won’t.” Try to cut a deal.

Cutting a deal and making compromises was exactly my point in the post you called a "touchy feely psych trick." If you are resisting your current plan, learn from it and change it. Keep it simple and keep yourself happy means not restricting yourself unnecessarily.

The_GingerBeard_Man

I was in a similar boat. I got near goal and slid into "maintenance". I let my nutrition start to slack and then the exercise started to slack and then the weight came back. It was scary, but I felt like I was unable to get a hold on it. I thought I knew what to do but I was unable to make a solid start. Eventually all the weight was back on and I was left standing there wondering what went wrong. Don't be like me.

I finally was able to turn it around when I found a meal plan that worked for me. It was from the DDP Yoga program and you can just google if you want. Basically it consists of breakfast: serving of fruit, and protein or complex carb; snack: serving of fruit or half protein; lunch:unlimited non-starch veggies and protein; snack: half protein; dinner: unlimited non-starch veggies and protein. To change the severity of weight loss you can make breakfast protein and complex carb, and keep adding carbs to meals with each phase you shift down until maintenance. They give you a nice food list and tell you to highlight the items you like and line through the stuff you don't. Then go buy what you enjoy and cook that. DDP is also big on gluten free and dairy free, and that works for my house because I am lactose intorlerant, and my GF has celiac disease. They preach Organic too, but we are less picky about that stuff.

To make things easy I freeze all my proteins in single serving size. Then I just thaw out as many servings as I need for that meal for my family. I find that way easier than freezing in my traditional meal size portions and then figuring out how much should be served and how much is left overs based on who is eating that meal.

You might find another system that works for you and that is cool. My best advice is just pick a system and implement it. My brother liked the beachbody 21 day fix and its silly container system. My first time around IIFYM really worked well for me, but then I needed a little more structure after I failed at maintenance. I know plenty of people who like weightwatchers or even various keto systems. I guess my advice is really to not try and reinvent the wheel, but just pick a system that works and use it.

garystrickland357

daniperszyk wrote: »

Thank you, everyone! Especially to everyone who said something along the lines of "it's not that you can't, it's that you WON'T", whoa. That really resonated. I think it's time to look at my priorities in life and figure out WHY I won't -- so thank you all for taking the time to post here so that I'd finally realize that. You all are the best!

I know it's against the rules to link to another social media website, so I'll relate something I found this weekend. I was reading the most inspirational story about a man that's in his mid forties. He weighed 500 pounds and had a life altering conversation with a friend. The friend was dying of cancer. The friend said, "I'm dying from a disease. I can't change that. You are dying from the choices you are making. You do have the ability to change that."
This person changed his life. He has lost over 270 pounds and has completed a full ironman competition.

The point is - decide if this is important to you. Don't dig your grave with a fork. Make a choice to change your life and the temptations will become manageable. Desserts are ok - just learn to manage.

I've struggled at times in my life. Personally, when I have been successful is when I have simply made a choice to change. If you really want a different outcome you can make it happen.

bikecheryl

tirowow12385 wrote: »

So basically you gave in to your urges and went over your calorie budget, the solution is, don't go over it and I'm not trying to be a captain obvious but you asked how people do it, this is how I do it, two weeks later after not giving in and I stepped on the scale, I see results. It's worth it and more satisfying than going over your calorie budget.

This !!! And just believe in the process because it really does work!

Katiebear_81

Take some time to really consider what works for you... Do you need/want a variety of foods/meals? Are you happy eating similar foods for a while? What has worked for me (I'm a routine eater) is prepping my "day time" food for the whole week on the weekend. It cuts down on the temptation to eat out for lunch, and helps me fuel my day properly. Then I figure out what "fit's" into my evening meal. I've kept doing this week after week after week... and now it's just my habit. Habits will outlast motivation every time. So try to develop some habits that will keep you on track towards your goal. Then reward yourself (I like buying clothes, ha ha... and I try to avoid food rewards) once you've reached whatever mini goal you'd like to set, whether that is reaching a specific weight, or even staying consistent (ie. log every meal, every day for 14 days or whatever works for you).

dsboohead

You havent hit your rock bottom yet! You will! Mine was over the holidays when I saw the holiday pictures. I was the biggest one at the table! WTH?!??!
Now my sister is worried she will be the biggest.....I can only hope

2aycocks

concordancia wrote: »

Go back to step one. Log everything. Next week is soon enough to worry about specific targets, this week, you need to commit to tracking.

This! ^^^^^