Need inspiration! please help =)

lq022

I posted this on my blog, and realized that it wont reach many people that way. I need some inspirational support and would like to share my blog post with the hopes that someone has been to this level of despair and can offer some words of encouragement . Thank you

I hope this blog post will not be a long one because I really need to go to bed ! (545AM comes awfully early!) .. However, I feel like I need an outlet to let out my frustration. I started back on MFP only about two weeks ago at the suggestion of my doctor, since my weight has increased about 10 pounds since my last physical ... I know what the reason is .. I;m in an accelerated nursing program and really dont have any time to do anything but school. Plus when I do have time off, I want to spend it with my friends and not in a gym ... just being honest. I lostabout 7 pounds in a week and a half ... I thought I was doing so good! and then 3 pounds of it came back ... after I was done with my time of the month, mind you. My eating wasnt fantastic the entire way, but I still kept under calories and it was way less than I usually eat so I figured I was good .... while it is frustrating to gain back the 3 pounds, It just keeps reminding me that I still dont know what or IF I have what it takes to really get this weight off. Everyone in my life is moving on ... my two best friends have boyfriends, the big group of people I used to have to party with every weekend are either in relationships, or living on their own so they dont have enough money to go out a ton, or they've met new people and are doing new things. And here I am ... stuck still living at home, back in school for at least another few months, no boyfriend, no dates, nothing exciting happening. I'm not meeting new people and I just feel like everything keeps coming back to the weight. In my mind, if I could get this weight off, the ENTIRE world would open up ... I would open up and be the person I know I am . My parents are very straight forward with me about everything ... they always tell me its the weight ... thats why boys dont ask you out ... thats why you dont have the confidence to go after what youi want .... And while I tell them that they are being mean and that I already know all of these things ... i know deep down that they are right. They love me more than anything and would never say anything if it wasnt true ... they aren being mean .. they're being real. And I've heard all of this before ... FOR YEARS. And I still dont change. ANd I dont know why I dont change.



I literally think about my weight every single day of my life. It consumes me ... IT makes me feel awful and I cant see all of the greatness I have inside of myself ... and I feel so sad because the years are literally passing me by. I'm not a teenager anymore ... I'm not even in my early 20s anymore ... In 5 months I'm going to have my second bachelors degree ... In 5 years, I will most probably have my masters degree and be a nurse practitioner. I have the world by the balls right now ... and I'm miserable. I have no one to share it with, no happiness in my appearance and no confidence in myself. I honestly do not know what its going to take for me to get this weight off .... I just tell myself to push ... just go to the gym, eat clean, and watch your portions. I know what to do . I know whant not to do ... I just chose to take inaction.And, again, I dont know why. Maybe its laziness ... Maybe its fear ... Maybe its because I can always find another excuse to not work out. Maybe its an underlying reason I havent even discovered inside of myself yet. That probably scares me the most.... that its something I havent even taken a crack at yet. Because at least all of the other things are easy .. dont be lazy, dont be scared, and just go work out.



I really just feel like if I had gastric bypass that I could lose the weight because I literally wouldnt have a place for the food to go, and I would prevent myself from putting the weight back on. I'm getting back to that place where I want to try something drastic ... cut calories to below 1200 or take diet pills ... I know I wont stick with those either though ... and my medical background prevents me from taking such extreme measures. I know too much for my own good, but I'm too scared to go after what I want. I need a change. I need to do something to break free from this. I just dont know what it is yet ........

Cheeky_and_Geeky

The app really helps you realize how much your actually consuming! I lose 8lbs last month because I just couldn't go over my calories without feeling super guilty. If you need to lose over 50lbs, I recommend talking to your Dr & getting an appetite suppressant prescription. Also, I hear weight watchers helps you become accountable for what you eat. Good luck & hang in there!