Feeling low

Nursie863

My motivation is at rock bottom. I feel like I started out the year so strong, but have completely fizzled out. I feel like I'm going to be stuck at this damn weight forever. I can't get my eating habits under control. I feel so much pressure to lose weight (most of that is internal), but I just cave in to temptation. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. I try not to buy snack food for the house, but nothing seems to stop me from going to get fast food whenever I'm bored, sad, etc. I'm currently working full time night shift at a high stress job, and going to school online for my master's. I've let exercise go by the wayside because I haven't managed to carve out time for it (I know I need to). I need some motivating words and ideas to get back on this bandwagon. Thanks!

bigghunny

First and foremost to not beat yourself up over the choices you have made in the past.. It's a new day tomorrow. Start with very small changes that you can handle one day at a time. Log your food no matter what you eat. So you can see where you can incorporate healthy foods. We are our own worst enemy. We see ourselves one way but it may not be fact. The hardest thing to do is take that first step. You did that by knowing you have issues and writing them down. You can do this and Baby steps will grow into bigger ones and you will be able to make it. I promise it does get better. Just need determination and to love yourself. You are worth the work to be a happy healthier you.
Add me if you like

kq1981

Oh lovely, I’ve been there, from December to probably last month I got lazy and stopped counting calories and haven’t exercised like I should. I’m a nurse too so I feel the struggles of shift work and grabbing “easy” food from Maccas on my way home. I’m also a single mum so life is hectic and hard sometimes. BUT, I have made sure I am ALWAYS active on mfp, even when filling my diary incorrectly and not being honest about eating ive have managed to stay within 1-2 kg of my weigh in from December. I’m still on a streak, 465 days today Don’t be upset, we are human and have our moments. I’ve learned not to let my ‘moment’ define my ability to commit to MFP and not to make me feel guilty or like a failure because we absolutely aren’t! I’ve re started. So from last week I’ve tried my hardest to weigh foods, be honest and accountable and enter EVERYTHING into my diary, even when there’s the big fat red words telling me I’m over my calorie allowance. You can do it! Keep active of MFP, every day, log it all and move forward, tomorrow will always be a new day! add people where you can for motivation, but keep on going! Good luck

kommodevaran

Maybe it's because you start out strong. Don't do that. You just have to nudge a lot of small and big habits in the right direction. And change the way you think about many things. So don't "try" to not buy snack food for the house, just don't do it. But you will need to do something in return, that feels like a reasonable bargain. Plan balanced meals you actually want to eat, that is less work/stress and more pleasure than fast food. Then sit down and enjoy the meal. And decide that you're not going to let emotions dictate your eating behavior. Exercise can be a great stress reliever, and a bonus is that you can't eat while you exercise.

rheddmobile

It's really hard to avoid eating for pleasure when there are few other sources of pleasure in your life! What worked for me was taking a long look at my life, and eliminating some long term issues which had become sources of stress, as well as adding some other sources of non-food related pleasure, and discovering some low-calorie sources of food pleasure.

Your situation involves two high stress issues which you can't easily avoid, your job and your studies, but which are hopefully also temporary. First of all, is there any action you can take which would make your job less stressful, such as confronting an unpleasant situation which needs to be remedied? And second, when the stress gets to you, remind yourself that this is a temporary situation. "I'm stressed out right now, but I won't always be in graduate school. My life will get easier eventually."

As far as non-food sources of pleasure, I made an effort to spend more time outside in nature, and I started painting my fingernails funny colors whenever I felt like having fast food. I also learned to enjoy lattes with foamed almond milk and dark chocolate, and herbal tea. Find something that makes you feel good and add it to your life instead of food. For boredom, well, you can kill two birds with one stone there - if you find yourself bored do a YouTube workout. Exercise doesn't need to take a long time, a five minute workout is better than no workout and way better than going out for fries.

If none of this speaks to you right now, give yourself permission to have other priorities for a while and put weight loss on the back burner. It's okay to focus on your studies and then lose weight later. But it's pretty miserable to feel guilty because you don't have time or energy for both! It's okay to not do this right now and just eat at maintenance. But whatever you decide, give yourself permission, and be happy and in control. This is your life, you got this!

jefamer2017

As far as scheduling time for exercise. What I did while in school and working full time was literally make a schedule of daily tasks and follow it. I used excel to make the schedule I was even able to make time for social events and down time. It worked for me and made things much more manageable and less stressful.

Seffell

Why not try and fit some fast food into your calories? Maybe not not every day but still you don't need to cut it out. Try a very small deficit to begin with. Don't try big changes. Start logging what you're eating and see what you can do to create a small deficit. You don't need to eat "clean" whatever this might mean. Even if you buy snacks and eat them - log them, see the calories, don't turn a blind eye and decide to start again tomorrow. Starting again tomorrow and starting strong is not needed and makes you wanna run away eventually. Just do it today - log your meals.

Start with attempting a small deficit. Eating healthy will come after. You don't need to start both at the same time.

100_PROOF_

Beating yourself up about it isn't going to help. I promise you that. It only makes it worse.
We all go through this at times. I've felt the same way about 58865 times. No matter what stage of this process, it happens sometimes.

You are still here so that's a good thing. I wish I had the answer to your question but i don't but will tell you that we all go through it at times. Keep logging on , keep trying even when you don't feel like it. You'll get there eventually.

Here's what helped me in the beginning- take what applies to you and leave what doesn't.
Remember weight loss comes from creating a caloric deficit. Calorie deficit- weight loss.
You don't need to go to extremes to lose weight, just create a calorie deficit. You don't need to go on a fad diet or anything crazy.

kroe4

I feel you girl! I'm one of those people who loves to eat out because of the pure convenience. I still have fast food at least a few times a week. They key is making smarter choices. At McDonalds I'll get a grilled chicken wrap, a fruit and yogurt parfait and a water.. or at Wendy's I'll have a double cheeseburger (extra protein) and a water. When you have time just go to your "go to" fast food restaurant's website site and see what the best choices are. Knowing what I can get from where is a huge help for me. I don't have to make a home cooked meal every night or food prep and I'm loosing weight at a great pace. I've been at it since March and just recently added doing a Zumba DVD in my living room every evening. It might be just me, but I don't feel you need to change your eating and add exercise all at once. I focused on only eating healthier first, then as the weight came off I actually wanted to start exercising. Keep your head up, remember everyday is a new chance to start over. You got this!

Nursie863

Thank you all so much for your kind and encouraging words! I will use this thread as a reference for when I am feeling down in the dumps and need a boost. I will definitely try these tips and techniques.

NovusDies

It is nearly impossible for some people to try and lose weight when they are highly stressed. In addition to external stress you are dealing with internal stress too over exercise and weight loss. You don't need to exercise to lose weight or maintain weight. Can you start with giving yourself permission to stop exercising for now? If you find the time and energy to do it make it a bonus not a requirement.

Next is weight loss. Instead of making each day a required weight loss day why not make it optional? You know the calories you need to lose weight so determine your maintenance calories and try to stay within those. Can you give yourself permission to have no loss but no gain days as often as you need them? The thing is you might find that in time even on a day you may say it is okay to eat to maintenance you might be able to eat just a little less. Weight loss may slow but slow may be exactly what you need right now.

This may not be the best suggestion in this thread for you. You may see something else that you like more or maybe you will pick and choose. We are all either guessing or speaking from experience. Knowing that I have my own permission to eat to maintenance whenever I feel I need it is a welcome relief from the previous attempts when I got angry with myself for failing.

Jadub729

I still eat fast food and fit them into my calorie goals. I like McDonalds, I can always get a kids meal or eat half of my combo meal. Or maybe just one day I'll eat at my maintenance goal just for a break. Motivation is not what gets us to our goals, dedication is...motivation comes and goes as you've already figured out

urloved33

start w ONE change. ONE. maybe a healthy breakfast or healthy lunch or increase your water intake...when you have that one change a habit...make another change. baby steps.

kq1981

Btw I do eat Maccas and not feel guilty, I just make it fit into my calorie allowance. Just thought I’d share that because my above post implied eating McDonald’s isn’t ok. It is (for me and my lifestyle anyways). And I don’t feel guilty when I do anymore

AnnPT77

As an additional thought, if you'll pardon me going all squishy new age psych-y on you:

Self-definition is important.

Nursie863 wrote: »

My motivation is at rock bottom. I feel like I started out the year so strong, but have completely fizzled out. I feel like I'm going to be stuck at this damn weight forever. I can't get my eating habits under control. I feel so much pressure to lose weight (most of that is internal), but I just cave in to temptation. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. I try not to buy snack food for the house, but nothing seems to stop me from going to get fast food whenever I'm bored, sad, etc. I'm currently working full time night shift at a high stress job, and going to school online for my master's. I've let exercise go by the wayside because I haven't managed to carve out time for it (I know I need to). I need some motivating words and ideas to get back on this bandwagon. Thanks!

Can you create a little room for change in how you think about yourself? What I'm reading in the bolded sections is "I am this way" - like inherently. That's just not the case. It may be how you've behaved at some points in the past, but it's not who you are. Who you are and especially how you behave are flexible, malleable. (Ever heard the phrase "fake it until you make it"? ).

There's a vast difference, psychologically, between "I can't get my eating under control" and "I haven't found the right strategy yet". The latter creates room for change.

Assess your feelings. Bored? Indulge in a happy hobby (ideally one that requires clean hands, or creates dirty ones, so it's less tempting to eat (embroidery, sketching, gardening, etc.). Sad? Maybe a hot aromatherapy bubble bath, or a walk in the fresh air, or even a brief period of stretching or deep breathing. Think of some new strategies. Ask others here what strategies they've used. Focus on the factors you influence or control. If you try something, and it doesn't work, think of something different to try next time.

Give yourself the conceptual room to change, then try out strategies for changing. It doesn't have to be big things, it doesn't have to be all or nothing, it doesn't have to work perfectly every single moment of every day. Persistence and small, incremental changes are kinda magic. You can do this!

jennifer_417

One thing that helps me is, every Sunday night, I make myself a rough schedule for the week. That way, I don't have to think about trying to find time for something. For the fast food, I have a couple of thoughts. It's possible that you're using it as a comfort to help cope with the stress of your job. If this is true, then try to think of other things you find rewarding/relaxing. (Hot bath, some kind hobby, etc). If it's a time issue, then you may find batch cooking helpful. Take an afternoon a whip up a couple of hrealthy dishes that will give you several servings each.

((((Hug))) Don't be too hard on yourself. You have a lot going on, but it won't last forever!