dieting alone

pippywillow

I've lost weight successfully in the past, four years ago I lost 70 lbs and have kept most of it off, but it is creeping back on. I did pretty well when I was still with my ex-husband, but now I'm living alone and having a hard time staying motivated.

How do you hold yourself accountable?

I am in a long distance relationship, but he's already in great shape, he eats well and exercises, and doesn't struggle with it like I do, so he doesn't completely understand what I'm dealing with.

ahoy_m8

I'm kind of the opposite.... it's easier for me to stick to my plan when I'm alone vs. resisting the temptations of hanging out with partners in crime. It seems like this thread is relevant to your thought process, even though it is in the maintaining forum. https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10667107/im-slipping-and-i-need-some-motivation/p1

tl;dr: motivation is overrated. It's great when you have it, but it's unreliable. Discipline is much more dependable. We all do things we aren't in the mood to do at the moment (work out, cook, housework, go to work) because it is something we committed to do or the consequences of flaking out are worse than just doing it. OP, you have had a lot of success. Reach back into your own experience to find those strengths and attributes that served you well in your past. Best to you!

mulecanter

Are you doing this for you or someone else? Don't validate yourself through their eyes. From your picture it looks like you have a child. Staying in shape for your children is noble, use that. I have teenage sons, one of my motivations is to be around and active when they are men.

CowboySar

I feel the same as ahoy_m8 does and find it easier on my own. I work away from home for 10 days and home for 4 days. Super easy to be motivated and accountable. I find at home my wife who does not follow any fitness or nutrition plan makes it much more difficult for many reasons, time, she don't eat what I do, temptations and the like.

Also as others have said do this for you and no one else. Using your kids as the motivation and accountability is great. It took me having grandkids to get my crap together, I went from 320lbs and last weigh in was 186lbs, as I wanted to see my grandkids grow up.

Dani9585

I hold myself accountable by telling myself that I'm only "hurting" myself to not stay on track.

By that, I mean that I could put myself at a higher risk for illnesses and such. I want to be healthy. I can be healthy and go over my goals once in awhile, but if it's a regular habit, I know my risks increase.

I also think about how important my lifestyle is to me. If it's important, I'll make it work. If it's not, I'll let it slide.

It's important - so I hold myself accountable and I stay on track.

nowine4me

That’s funny, I find it sooooo much easier when solo. Make time to plan and prep meals. Use your alone time for yoga, cardio or simple meditation. There are lots of great podcasts about how NOT to soothe boredom or loneliness with food.

Mandylou19912014

I guess you need to learn to find a diet which suits you and your lifestyle .. set realistic short term goals and just focus on smashing them .. we are all bound to have slip ups but take each day as it comes and focus on eating as healthy as you can per day

Running_and_Coffee

The opposite over here!
My biggest obstacle is that my husband and kids eat much more, much later in the day than me (because I wake up early to exercise and go to bed earlier) and much more freely. Yet, they are all skinny...not thin, skinny. I love my family but think my lifestyle would be easier to maintain if I were solo.

Danp

The only person you are accountable to is you regardless of any other factors. In fact you can't not be accountable to yourself.

passenger79

Complete opposite with me got to goal weight while single easy to maintain then I met my tall,skinny partner who can eat whatever he wants and not put on any weight and he introduced me to Reece's peanut butter cups and eating out every weekend plus drinking lol....good job I love him .

But it's alot harder for me to diet when every weekend there is food in abundance when Im.by myself I can plan alot better . You don't need partner in your home to motivate you you need to do that yourself. You 've done great losing 70 pounds you can lose weight again

ruqayyahsmum

Another one here who finds it easier alone. I spend all weekend defending my food choices to my 6ft skinny *kitten* partner who eats what ever he likes and complains I don't serve enough real food
I had to explain to Jim that with me being 5ft 2 and trying to lose weight I have less calories to spend so yes I need my salads and veggies, no I can't join him for a massive fry up or fall into a big bucket of kfc

LivingtheLeanDream

Personally I think its harder when the family is around, at least when its just yourself you can plan your meals around just you.
Well done on a 70lb loss but please don't let it start to creep on now when you've done so well. Do it for YOU, you know you'll benefit in a host of ways by keeping at a healthy weight.

stanmann571

I'm definitely on team alone.

Nobody else bringing food in, nobody distracting, nobody telling me I'm messing up their Saturday with my early morning run. etc.

neugebauer52

I have realized that "dieting" is not the answer - I have to change to a much healthier lifestyle. I am changing a little bit every day, every week. I eat the food I enjoy and TRY very hard to exercise portion control. MFP is a tremendous help in so many ways. As long as I stay on around 1.800 calories a day, my weight will come off.

evivahealth

nowine4me wrote: »

That’s funny, I find it sooooo much easier when solo. Make time to plan and prep meals. Use your alone time for yoga, cardio or simple meditation. There are lots of great podcasts about how NOT to soothe boredom or loneliness with food.

@nowine4me - I love a good podcast! Please hit us up with the links or the names so we can enjoy

RadishEater

Team alone all the way when starting out, I find it easier to stick to healthy choices when i'm not watching tv with someone who is eating a steak with mac&cheese for dinner every night or bringing thai or ribs or pizza or wings takeout back to eat.

I think the hardest food experience was when my bf had to work late and didn't want to make food but wanted some company so I went with him and watched him eat an entire plate of loaded nachos. But I had all my calories already and didn't want to go over, so I sat there and talked to him while sipping water. I know he appreciated the company but it was painful for me since I was 2months-ish into losing weight. I love mexican food and definitely could have eaten a bunch of nachos, so in the end I ate one nacho with cheese after he was finished.

stanmann571

kballsocc wrote: »

Team alone all the way when starting out, I find it easier to stick to healthy choices when i'm not watching tv with someone who is eating a steak with mac&cheese for dinner every night or bringing thai or ribs or pizza or wings takeout back to eat.

I think the hardest food experience was when my bf had to work late and didn't want to make food but wanted some company so I went with him and watched him eat an entire plate of loaded nachos. But I had all my calories already and didn't want to go over, so I sat there and talked to him while sipping water. I know he appreciated the company but it was painful for me since I was 2months-ish into losing weight. I love mexican food and definitely could have eaten a bunch of nachos, so in the end I ate one nacho with cheese after he was finished.

What's wrong with steak and MacnCheese every night?? besides monotony.

NovusDies

My wife and I have completely different eating patterns. I don't eat breakfast while she does. I eat my biggest meal at lunch and she eats hers at dinner. We are both trying to lose weight which is good for reducing temptation but meal planning is mostly a solo act for both of us. That might seem odd but it is important to do what we both do naturally and not try to force ourselves together which could hurt progress. For instance, when I do try and eat what she does for lunch if I am not careful I won't get enough calories which throws off my day. If the reverse is true she may have too many calories at lunch and be miserable at dinner. Of course pre-logging prevents that but sometimes we forget.

hesn92

I guess I don’t see the problem. I live with my husband and kids but they have nothing to do with my food intake or exercise I do that all on my own. I don’t even talk about it with my husband. We have different interests.

xbowhunter

I can re-late to all of this. yesterday my wife was snacking on a bag of chips while we were talking. I am @ the point now where this doesn't bother me & I truly wanted none of that...lol

I stick to my calorie goals no matter what high calorie food is in front of me. I have self control & won't revert back to the old me no matter what. I have worked way too hard to get to my goal weight & it will be a cold day in hell for someone to shove crap in my to my system...

Lounmoun

I log in here every day. I prelog my food most days to help me make better choices.
I weigh myself every week and record it.
I got a pedometer and set step goals for myself to increase my activity. Sometimes I do other exercise alone. Sometimes I exercise with other people.
I live with two people who have different calorie needs and goals. I come to MFP for support and understanding I guess.
My motivation to lose weight is so I can do the things I want to do and be healthier. I don't really need to be monitored or held accountable by someone else. No one else cares as much as I do about this. If I don't want it enough to follow through for me then nothing anyone else says or does is going to help.

Get some friends here or join a group. Start logging and weighing yourself regularly. Make small sustainable changes. Find something active that you enjoy.
If you are an emotional or stress eater work on new tools to deal with those things.