Improving my body cosmetically (body hair and skin)

mikenmar

This is a bit off topic, but I'm hoping someone can point me in the right direction on this: I'm finally whipping my body into shape, and I really like how it's coming along. I'm getting a chest and abs now --yay!

But I still need something to look really good for a partner. In particular, I have a fair amount of body hair all over my upper body, and I'm as pale as a ghost. Can someone give me some advice on how to get myself looking a bit more presentable? I've never tried waxing or tanning of any kind, so I don't know anything about it. But I assume that's what I'm wanting to do.

I don't know if I want to get completely rid of my chest hair, but I'd at least like to get it off my back and shoulders. And I'm not sure I want to do the tanning salon thing. Am I going to end up orange like a certain president? I think I'd rather be pale than that... How can I get a nice pleasant shade of light tan? I'm of Northern European descent, so I tend to go from pale to burn when I get in the sun.

Any advice?

Thanks!

mikenmar

Oh, one other thing: I've got a bit of loose skin hanging around my gut and butt. Not a ton of it, but enough to notice. Will this ever go away, or would it have to be surgically removed or something?

livingleanlivingclean

Why do you want to change yourself for someone you don't even know exists? Why are you presuming your perfect partner wants a hairless orange person?

mikenmar

livingleanlivingclean wrote: »

Why do you want to change yourself for someone you don't even know exists? Why are you presuming your perfect partner wants a hairless orange person?

Why do you assume the person doesn't exist?

Regardless, forget about what the other person wants. I want to look good for myself too, and I don't like the aesthetic of a really pale, hairy person. I'm not looking to be Mr. Tan Man, I just a bit more color than egg shell white.

RaeBeeBaby

I think everyone wants to look their best for a partner (current or future). You questions are totally valid.

I'm not currently lifting, but I have in the past. I've seen lots of competitions and I'm sure they go the waxing and tanning route. There's plenty of ways to remove the hair - shaving being the quickest, but it will grow back relatively quickly. If you want to have it waxed, just look for a salon in your area that specializes in that. It's not a pleasant process, but it will give longer lasting results than shaving. If you like the look of less hair, you can spend the money and have it removed with lasers. It takes a number of treatments, but it's more permanent. Lots of medical spas that offer this service. It used to be pretty spendy, but I think the price has come down.

As far as tanning, unless you're going on a tropical vacation and don't want a serious burn, I'd avoid the tanning salons. I'm also of Northern European descent and and naturally pale. I have not had good experiences with tanning salons. Mostly burns and a sun rash that is seriously itchy and uncomfortable. I also don't think it's healthy for your skin to have that much intense UV rays all at one time. If you did it you probably would not turn orange, but there are risks. They do start you off slowly, so it would take a number of sessions to get the look you wanted if you went that route. Do you swim? I have found the best way to get an all over tan is going to my outdoor swimming pool when the sun is out. I swim in the morning and within just a couple days of sunshine my (hard to tan) legs are turning a nice shade of brown along with the rest of me. By mid-summer I have a really nice tan without a burn. Something about the sunrays coming through the water. I don't know why it works that way, but it sure does for me.

Depending on your age and how much weight you've lost, you may just have to live with the loose skin. It's different for everyone. Skin removal surgery is expensive and extremely painful. I can't imagine going that route unless your have a HUGE amount of loose skin and you just can't tolerate it. Check out the TLC show Skin Tight, and you'll see what I mean. Nobody has a perfect body, but we all want to look our best!

Good luck to you!

Davidsdottir

I vote to not mess with the chest hair.

kami3006

Davidsdottir wrote: »

I vote to not mess with the chest hair.

I second that! Love it!

stanmann571

Davidsdottir wrote: »

I vote to not mess with the chest hair.

kami3006 wrote: »

Davidsdottir wrote: »

I vote to not mess with the chest hair.

I second that! Love it!

This is definitely something to hold off on until/unless you've already consulted with the desired partner, because opinions certainly vary across the spectrum.

sgt1372

I "manscape" but I do it for myself.

It's your body, do what you want w/it but, if you're doing it to try to please someone else, especially someone you haven't even met yet, you may be disappointed.

ashleyrebekah392

My husband uses his trimmer for his chest hair. So it's not completely gone but not everywhere. Or you could wax. Lasts a lot longer. As for tanning, I'm a pale girl. Honestly this summer is the most tan I think I've ever been just because I've been outside a lot and I still WEAR sunscreen! No burns here but getting a decent tan, gradually. I've used tanning beds before and IF you do that start out with only 3-4 mins at a time for a few times a gradually build up a minute at a time. I don't recommend just because of the health problems that can come from it BUT that's your choice. I used to go quite often a few years ago. I've also done the spray tans, I personally use the neutrogena spray tan stuff from Walmart. It doesn't leave me orange looking at all, but I only use it on my legs as they don't tan at all hardly and I love tan legs. So you could do that in the lightest shade they have and try that out and see how it goes. You might need help though on your back and such as those places are hard to reach. I don't really have any advice on the saggy skin though. Hope this helps some. Everyone wants to feel and look their best!

Erik8484

I would avoid tanning beds personally due to skin cancer, which is particularly relevant since you're pale.

Fake tans (spray on, creams etc) have improved a lot. I've used one once and didn't end up orange (I thought I looked awesome with a tan). It did start to rub off (unevenly) over time though, leaving somewhat of a splotchy look on my skin that I was conscious of. I think it might be the kind of thing that requires a fair amount of upkeep.

Trimmers work for body hair if you just want to avoid that unruly, unmanageable, hair everywhere look. I haven't ever waxed so I can't talk to that. If you find you want to shave your back/shoulders, theres a thing called a BAKblade that will help you with that. I tried it once and cut myself, but I suspect practice makes perfect!

kshama2001

I used to shave a friend's back. His back hair didn't bother either of us at all - he had a great tattoo on his back that he liked to have uncovered in the summer.

I recommend waxing instead.

In 2011 I had a series of tanning sessions to prepare my fair Irish skin for a trip to Florida. I needed to have a skin cancer removed the next year and another the following year. Perhaps a coincidence, but I won't use a tanning bed again.

I carefully get a farmer's tan each year from gardening, but limiting my time during the worst of the sun. You could slowly darken as well, but at least shirtless is an option for you

FL_Hiker

I would think again about the hair as well... when I first started dating my husband I saw that he had removed some of his hair lol.. I thought it was so silly and weird looking!! I asked him why he did it... and he said "well I just assumed you wouldn't like hair" lol!! Every person has a difference preference! I would do what's most comfortable for you, and what makes YOU feel great !

nutmegoreo

Pet shaver - inexpensive, and a great way to trim hair evenly to a shorter length.

kimny72

I don't know enough about men's hair removal to suggest anything on that.

I am very fair (like see-through ) and fake tanning has come a long way. You do kind of have to experiment because different products look natural or fake on different people. You can start with products that say they are gradual, so it takes several applications (like using a moisturizer) and you can see how it's going. I know some people who get spray tans, and a good place should carefully consult with you on how dark you want to go, so again you can start off with just a little color to see how you like it. I don't have the money to keep up a spray tan though!

I would also avoid tanning beds, especially for someone with fair skin I think that's too much risk.

Loose skin depends on a lot of factors. For some people it tightens up a lot, for others not so much. For some the loose skin will continue to tighten up over several years.

mnbvcxzlkjhgfdsa12

I second what everyone says about not changing yourself for other people, but if you want to make changes for you then go for it.

Laser hair removal is amazing. If you permanently don’t want a hairy back, or anywhere else then get it lazered. It’s pretty much pain free and done in around 10 sessions plus you can shave in between so you don’t have that annoying stubbly then hairy cycle you get with waxing.

Avoid the sun bed, it’s really really bad for you! If you really, really dislike being pale get a spray tan.

Calliope610

As for the tan, there is nothing wrong with limited exposure to natural sunlight, with the appropriate SPF sunscreen, increasing the exposure time as you build a base tan.

kimny72

Calliope610 wrote: »

As for the tan, there is nothing wrong with limited exposure to natural sunlight, with the appropriate SPF sunscreen, increasing the exposure time as you build a base tan.

Unfortunately though, for many of us who are very fair, tanning simply doesn't happen. It took me 2 or 3 summers in my teens desperately trying to develop a base tan to figure that out. I go pale...pale...pale...burnt...pale We are a misunderstood tribe

deputy_randolph

The chest hair is probably fine to keep. The back and shoulder hair is another story.

You're probably going to have a hard time shaving your own back. I suggest getting it professionally waxed if you are ultra-hairy OR include "must be willing to shave my back" in any personal ads for future partner.

Seffell

Prickly chest? Mmmmm .... nnno.