Coworkers
happytree923
Posts: 463 Member
I'm the youngest person (by a lot) in my office and I've noticed now that I'm down 40 pounds and visibly smaller, coworkers are insisting I take home leftovers from special meals or desserts almost every time we have them. This is usually accompanied with a 'young metabolism' comment, that I should take the food because they'll gain weight if they take it. My metabolism wasn't so young eight months ago... I'm getting really annoyed at taking the food home because the food gifter won't stop and then throwing it away. I know it comes from a very good place, and the solution is to just stand up for myself, but I'm annoyed and need to vent. Has anyone else experienced this?
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Replies
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Yeah. I will either take it if it's something my son will eat, he's 8, or I say my family won't eat it if it's been opened because my guy is picky. I've also point blank said young metabolism or not I've been doing well losing weight and this won't help. Depends on the situation1
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Tell them no thanks and if they continue tell them to stop0
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I would just say no thanks, I don’t have a use for it.0
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Have you explained that you have worked hard to lose weight and that the food gifts are unwanted?0
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If they don't take no for answer say loudly "Hostile work environment" - that ought to shut them down!!
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@aimeetu that made me giggle-snort
Some of us old folks have a weird notion that young people are always going without food. My family seems to get together around eating so I've been avoiding family get togethers as much as possible. You can't exactly do that, since the pushers are at work. Taking the food to appease the lady and then tossing it is probably something I would do as well, so I'm not much help. 😄
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Drop their food off at a homeless food kitchen on your way home, no food wasted and then you'll feel better :-)7
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@aimeetu that made me giggle-snort
Some of us old folks have a weird notion that young people are always going without food. My family seems to get together around eating so I've been avoiding family get togethers as much as possible. You can't exactly do that, since the pushers are at work. Taking the food to appease the lady and then tossing it is probably something I would do as well, so I'm not much help. 😄
I really think your first sentence is why they’re doing it, even though I have home cooked food all the time! It’s coming from a caring place and I really like my coworkers so I’d feel terrible being sassy about it to make them stop.0 -
Drop their food off at a homeless food kitchen on your way home, no food wasted and then you'll feel better :-)
Will food kitchens accept partially eaten food? It’s stuff like one third of a birthday cake, three leftover tacos from a platter, etc. I thought that kind of stuff can’t be donated for food safety reasons.0 -
happytree923 wrote: »Drop their food off at a homeless food kitchen on your way home, no food wasted and then you'll feel better :-)
Will food kitchens accept partially eaten food? It’s stuff like one third of a birthday cake, three leftover tacos from a platter, etc. I thought that kind of stuff can’t be donated for food safety reasons.
I'm not sure, may depend where you live. But around here there's always poor homeless people on the side of the road begging, I'm sure one of them would be grateful at least? And if a coworker caught you they aren't going to be mad at you for doing it.0 -
Throw it away at work.
"But I don't want to offend them." If you have declined the food and they force it in you, they don't care about offending you. Stop worrying about their feelings.4 -
Throw it away at work.
"But I don't want to offend them." If you have declined the food and they force it in you, they don't care about offending you. Stop worrying about their feelings.
I live in Texas, this is a cultural thing and they genuinely believe they are being caring. I’m not going to make a mountain out of a molehill and risk damaging relationships with coworkers. Getting along at work is about picking your battles wisely.5 -
happytree923 wrote: »Throw it away at work.
"But I don't want to offend them." If you have declined the food and they force it in you, they don't care about offending you. Stop worrying about their feelings.
I live in Texas, this is a cultural thing and they genuinely believe they are being caring. I’m not going to make a mountain out of a molehill and risk damaging relationships with coworkers. Getting along at work is about picking your battles wisely.
I feel your pain. I live in North Florida and it is the same situation. Tell them no thank you enough and they will get the picture. Or, just take it home and say thanks and give it to a hobo. lol0 -
I have stopped to give to a homeless guy or two. I always make sure I have plastic forks in my glove box too. They think I am taking it home but there are many hungrier than I deserve to be!
I have also passed by trash bins and dumped it as well. Better in the trash then in me!3 -
Smile say thankyou and do step 1 or 2 as above^^^^.0
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I have seen the homeless scarf down what I have offered.....
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I like this option. When I backpacked Europe and south america, people would always hassle you for things, if you learn one foreign word, I would recommend, “nyet”. Say it in the scariest Russian accent you can. I know it will make gypsies run like kitten! lol2
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happytree923 wrote: »Throw it away at work.
"But I don't want to offend them." If you have declined the food and they force it in you, they don't care about offending you. Stop worrying about their feelings.
I live in Texas, this is a cultural thing and they genuinely believe they are being caring. I’m not going to make a mountain out of a molehill and risk damaging relationships with coworkers. Getting along at work is about picking your battles wisely.
Do they track your every movement? I'm not saying you need to stand in the middle of the office and throw it in the trash. I'm saying take the food, go back to your desk, and put it in your trash can before you leave. I've done it myself. The "cultural thing" is BS. People are food pushers this everywhere. Texas is not special in that respect.1 -
I've always been very effusive in thanking people for x item and then saying "NO...really" to y and z items. It seems to work. They will learn you're the one who could care less about donuts or tacos but will always happily accept that leftover blackberry cobbler (for example).0
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happytree923 wrote: »Throw it away at work.
"But I don't want to offend them." If you have declined the food and they force it in you, they don't care about offending you. Stop worrying about their feelings.
I live in Texas, this is a cultural thing and they genuinely believe they are being caring. I’m not going to make a mountain out of a molehill and risk damaging relationships with coworkers. Getting along at work is about picking your battles wisely.
100% agree, i wish I didnt piss people off it made my job harder. Short and sweet no thank you is the best you can do.0 -
happytree923 wrote: »Throw it away at work.
"But I don't want to offend them." If you have declined the food and they force it in you, they don't care about offending you. Stop worrying about their feelings.
I live in Texas, this is a cultural thing and they genuinely believe they are being caring. I’m not going to make a mountain out of a molehill and risk damaging relationships with coworkers. Getting along at work is about picking your battles wisely.
West Texas here, and yep, same thing. Giving food is seen as caring. I have the same issue at the Y (I'm a volunteer for an adult literacy program) and am constantly bombarded with all kinds of homemade goodies, no amount of "no thanks" will stop a 60 year old gramdma from bring you a dozen homemade tamales or brownies or lasagna, every week or so. I now just bring two or three divided lunch containers, fill them for myself and tell everyone that on my way home I'm dropping the rest of at CASA as I "don't want it to go to waste and can't eat all of it by myself" (CASA is a shelter for abandoned and abused children), not a single person found any offense to bringing homemade food to children that don't have a home.3 -
happytree923 wrote: »Throw it away at work.
"But I don't want to offend them." If you have declined the food and they force it in you, they don't care about offending you. Stop worrying about their feelings.
I live in Texas, this is a cultural thing and they genuinely believe they are being caring. I’m not going to make a mountain out of a molehill and risk damaging relationships with coworkers. Getting along at work is about picking your battles wisely.
West Texas here, and yep, same thing. Giving food is seen as caring. I have the same issue at the Y (I'm a volunteer for an adult literacy program) and am constantly bombarded with all kinds of homemade goodies, no amount of "no thanks" will stop a 60 year old gramdma from bring you a dozen homemade tamales or brownies or lasagna, every week or so. I now just bring two or three divided lunch containers, fill them for myself and tell everyone that on my way home I'm dropping the rest of at CASA as I "don't want it to go to waste and can't eat all of it by myself" (CASA is a shelter for abandoned and abused children), not a single person found any offense to bringing homemade food to children that don't have a home.
I might need to find something like that, I rarely see homeless people where I live (relatively cheap suburban area) so handing it out on the drive home isn't usually an option. Maybe I could throw it in a woodsy area near my apartment, I know there are some foxes around that might like it lol.2 -
happytree923 wrote: »happytree923 wrote: »Throw it away at work.
"But I don't want to offend them." If you have declined the food and they force it in you, they don't care about offending you. Stop worrying about their feelings.
I live in Texas, this is a cultural thing and they genuinely believe they are being caring. I’m not going to make a mountain out of a molehill and risk damaging relationships with coworkers. Getting along at work is about picking your battles wisely.
West Texas here, and yep, same thing. Giving food is seen as caring. I have the same issue at the Y (I'm a volunteer for an adult literacy program) and am constantly bombarded with all kinds of homemade goodies, no amount of "no thanks" will stop a 60 year old gramdma from bring you a dozen homemade tamales or brownies or lasagna, every week or so. I now just bring two or three divided lunch containers, fill them for myself and tell everyone that on my way home I'm dropping the rest of at CASA as I "don't want it to go to waste and can't eat all of it by myself" (CASA is a shelter for abandoned and abused children), not a single person found any offense to bringing homemade food to children that don't have a home.
I might need to find something like that, I rarely see homeless people where I live (relatively cheap suburban area) so handing it out on the drive home isn't usually an option. Maybe I could throw it in a woodsy area near my apartment, I know there are some foxes around that might like it lol.
Not to be difficult, but.... the food might not be suitable for animals (they might get sick), or the animals could become sort-of-tamed, used to the city and cause problems later on. Feeding wild animals without proper research might not be the wisest thing. I know you said lol at the end, but just to be sure
To your actual issue: I have had some similar issues, but I have found that usually a polite but honest ”no thanks, it would not get eaten at my home” is enough. If not, you could just try to institute a protocol where all leftover food gets donated directly to those who need it, or, here’s the kicker: if the people in your workplace claim they cannot eat those things because of their ”old metabolism” or whatnot, who is bringing those foods in the first place and why?
Also, at my workplace, whenever someone brings something, we just leave it on the table for everyone to snack on. If it needs to be kept in the fridge, maybe you guys could just put a sign on the door/fridge/wherever saying ”free X in the fridge, have a snack”. I’m guessing a lot of people are pretty happy to have a free afternoon snack.1 -
happytree923 wrote: »happytree923 wrote: »Throw it away at work.
"But I don't want to offend them." If you have declined the food and they force it in you, they don't care about offending you. Stop worrying about their feelings.
I live in Texas, this is a cultural thing and they genuinely believe they are being caring. I’m not going to make a mountain out of a molehill and risk damaging relationships with coworkers. Getting along at work is about picking your battles wisely.
West Texas here, and yep, same thing. Giving food is seen as caring. I have the same issue at the Y (I'm a volunteer for an adult literacy program) and am constantly bombarded with all kinds of homemade goodies, no amount of "no thanks" will stop a 60 year old gramdma from bring you a dozen homemade tamales or brownies or lasagna, every week or so. I now just bring two or three divided lunch containers, fill them for myself and tell everyone that on my way home I'm dropping the rest of at CASA as I "don't want it to go to waste and can't eat all of it by myself" (CASA is a shelter for abandoned and abused children), not a single person found any offense to bringing homemade food to children that don't have a home.
I might need to find something like that, I rarely see homeless people where I live (relatively cheap suburban area) so handing it out on the drive home isn't usually an option. Maybe I could throw it in a woodsy area near my apartment, I know there are some foxes around that might like it lol.
Not to be difficult, but.... the food might not be suitable for animals (they might get sick), or the animals could become sort-of-tamed, used to the city and cause problems later on. Feeding wild animals without proper research might not be the wisest thing. I know you said lol at the end, but just to be sure
To your actual issue: I have had some similar issues, but I have found that usually a polite but honest ”no thanks, it would not get eaten at my home” is enough. If not, you could just try to institute a protocol where all leftover food gets donated directly to those who need it, or, here’s the kicker: if the people in your workplace claim they cannot eat those things because of their ”old metabolism” or whatnot, who is bringing those foods in the first place and why?
Also, at my workplace, whenever someone brings something, we just leave it on the table for everyone to snack on. If it needs to be kept in the fridge, maybe you guys could just put a sign on the door/fridge/wherever saying ”free X in the fridge, have a snack”. I’m guessing a lot of people are pretty happy to have a free afternoon snack.
Yes, I know not to feed wild animals. I expect these animals tend to go through human garbage anyway but it was a joke. The food is brought because I work at a nonprofit with lots of volunteers coming through daily, and the food is there so the volunteers don't have to provide their own meals or snacks while they're working for free. Stuff like packaged cookies get left there until it's all gone but if it's Friday and we have something that won't last for very long that's when the pushing to take it home starts.0 -
happytree923 wrote: »happytree923 wrote: »Throw it away at work.
"But I don't want to offend them." If you have declined the food and they force it in you, they don't care about offending you. Stop worrying about their feelings.
I live in Texas, this is a cultural thing and they genuinely believe they are being caring. I’m not going to make a mountain out of a molehill and risk damaging relationships with coworkers. Getting along at work is about picking your battles wisely.
West Texas here, and yep, same thing. Giving food is seen as caring. I have the same issue at the Y (I'm a volunteer for an adult literacy program) and am constantly bombarded with all kinds of homemade goodies, no amount of "no thanks" will stop a 60 year old gramdma from bring you a dozen homemade tamales or brownies or lasagna, every week or so. I now just bring two or three divided lunch containers, fill them for myself and tell everyone that on my way home I'm dropping the rest of at CASA as I "don't want it to go to waste and can't eat all of it by myself" (CASA is a shelter for abandoned and abused children), not a single person found any offense to bringing homemade food to children that don't have a home.
I might need to find something like that, I rarely see homeless people where I live (relatively cheap suburban area) so handing it out on the drive home isn't usually an option. Maybe I could throw it in a woodsy area near my apartment, I know there are some foxes around that might like it lol.
Go talk to the police, most domestic abuse and children's shelters are fairly hidden from plain sight as they don't want the abusers and/or crap parents to find them easily. If they won't tell you outright where they are, they will offer to bring everything to them for you.3
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