I can't control myself

Junebug2022

I know that feeling.

Don’t think everyone is out to get you or make fun of you. Accept the praises or complements you get when you’re doing good, they aren’t lying to you. Learn to forgive yourself, i know that’s the the only person i never forgive. And don’t grow to be lonely like me, you get used to it pretty fast and get lost in it pretty long. Im 36 and still trying to find a way out.

COGypsy

One tool I use quite a bit is telling myself, "I'm a person who...". I've found it to be really effective in helping me remove the feelings I have associated with my actions. It usually takes a while to sink in, but I've used it on little things and big things and found it to be a huge help. It's switched things like "Jeez, I'm such a lazy slob I can't even get my bed made" to "I'm a person who makes my bed every morning." When I frame it that way, things become just another task in my day--like brushing my teeth or loading the dishwasher. Another one I've used is "I'm a person who takes care of a strong and healthy body". That makes it much easier to get myself to the gym since before I would tell myself that workouts are the consequence of being fat. I believe I got the trick from the Beck Diet Solution, which is a fantastic book and work book that uses cognitive behavioral therapy tools to help with weight loss.

kommodevaran

COGypsy wrote: »

One tool I use quite a bit is telling myself, "I'm a person who...". I've found it to be really effective in helping me remove the feelings I have associated with my actions. It usually takes a while to sink in, but I've used it on little things and big things and found it to be a huge help. It's switched things like "Jeez, I'm such a lazy slob I can't even get my bed made" to "I'm a person who makes my bed every morning." When I frame it that way, things become just another task in my day--like brushing my teeth or loading the dishwasher. Another one I've used is "I'm a person who takes care of a strong and healthy body". That makes it much easier to get myself to the gym since before I would tell myself that workouts are the consequence of being fat. I believe I got the trick from the Beck Diet Solution, which is a fantastic book and work book that uses cognitive behavioral therapy tools to help with weight loss.

OMG, I'm doing this too! I thought I was the only one. Thanks for making me feel a little less strange Oh, and it really works

dani_lopera

Nadia, no matter how much you weight I want you to understand how beautiful you are. Your goals shouldn't be just about losing weight... it should be about changing your lifestyle AND boosting your self-confidence and self-love. You have to love yourself to be able to succeed in this. You can't beat yourself up for eating that bowl of ice-cream or eating that slice of cake. It took me a long time to get where I am. I did diets and they worked yes.. but only temporarily. I gained it all back in a matter of weeks. The best advice i can possibly give you based on personal experience is to use this application and make a routine before you go to sleep for the next day or even weekly. Schedules will really help you and tracking your calories are important as you actually see how much sugar and fat is in what you eat. Do not think about food. Make yourself busy. Whether it is reading or watching tv or working out, make yourself unavailable. The more you are bored, the more you are inclined to eat.

Next, if you are craving chocolate, eat chocolate. Do not restrict yourself from eating the foods you normally eat. Your body is used to it and if you take it away, you will crave it more and more until you 3x of what you would of normally eaten. Learning to control how much of it is up to you.


Lastly, for exercise: I started off with cardio and it helped me as a beginner. Once i was satisfied with my weight, i began doing light weights and eventually started heavy lifting to gain muscle. It took me two years to get to the heavy lifting and I regret not having started earlier. As long as you workout, you lose fat. So whatever you do, just make sure to do it. Do not say "I ate this and this i might as well just not do anything" or "people are going to see me running and they're going to make fun of me. Remember that you are the only one who is going to benefit from this and those people are strangers and you shouldn't care.

I hope you reach your goal Nadia.

Misskcm

Hey!!! I added you. I see you live in Converse Texas I live on the west side of SA. Send me a message!!

Carlageddon

I understand exactly where you are coming from. I was 21.10st in March. I hate myself and the way girls looked, laughed and generally made me feel even worse about myself. I too didn't want to go out of the house.
I'm down to 20.2st this just this morning, and it's been a long road, and I've slipped more weeks than I should of, but I have noticed a difference the way some people now treat me. So what I'm saying is I really do relate to how you feel.

Two things I can suggest. First (If you live in the UK) get the M&S Balanced for you meals. Have one for lunch, and one for dinner and have something like boiled eggs for breakfast. The Meals are good as they have a balance of the things your body needs, and are simple, easy to buy and quick to cook.
Secondly, if you have someone you can rely on to support you, help you light exercise (remember just like everyone else is saying, weight loss comes from dieting not exercising) is there someone you can go for a walk with a couple of times a week, or swimming is good too, as it's low-impact so you aren't doing your self any harm (also with the way I felt, I was mostly underwater, so people couldn't judge what I looked like, so I could enjoy going swimming).

What ever you choose to do, I hope you get there, you will feel better. Keep at it.

TavistockToad

Carlageddon wrote: »

I understand exactly where you are coming from. I was 21.10st in March. I hate myself and the way girls looked, laughed and generally made me feel even worse about myself. I too didn't want to go out of the house.
I'm down to 20.2st this just this morning, and it's been a long road, and I've slipped more weeks than I should of, but I have noticed a difference the way some people now treat me. So what I'm saying is I really do relate to how you feel.

Two things I can suggest. First (If you live in the UK) get the M&S Balanced for you meals. Have one for lunch, and one for dinner and have something like boiled eggs for breakfast. The Meals are good as they have a balance of the things your body needs, and are simple, easy to buy and quick to cook.
Secondly, if you have someone you can rely on to support you, help you light exercise (remember just like everyone else is saying, weight loss comes from dieting not exercising) is there someone you can go for a walk with a couple of times a week, or swimming is good too, as it's low-impact so you aren't doing your self any harm (also with the way I felt, I was mostly underwater, so people couldn't judge what I looked like, so I could enjoy going swimming).

What ever you choose to do, I hope you get there, you will feel better. Keep at it.

i would tend to disagree with a couple of things.

1) if you cant cook, learn. yes those M&S meals are fine sometimes, but is that really all you'r going to eat for the rest of your life? sounds boring, restrictive and expensive to me. this is all about making sustainable lifestyle changes if the weight loss is going to stick

2) you cant rely on anyone else. if you do, and then that person says 'sorry i cant go for a walk' you have a ready made excuse to not do it. yes, find people who want to exercise with you, fill your friends list with supporters and cheerleaders on here, but don't rely on anyone but yourself to get it done.