Work is my big source of stress. But I am paralyzed when it comes to applying to other jobs

gallicinvasion
gallicinvasion Posts: 1,015 Member
I have been a director at my job for 3 years. I am pretty underpaid for my responsibilities, and my boss is so off-the-cuff and disorganized that it affects everything around him. But I feel like I have a mental block about applying for stuff; I edit my resume, and I open a document for a cover letter and I'm terrified to start.

Replies

  • Hamsibian
    Hamsibian Posts: 1,388 Member
    I'm with @Pour_Decisions. Everytime I get nervous about a job opportunity, I think "what's the worst thing that will happen? They'll say no." Yes, that would suck, but in the grand scheme of things, it's not a big deal. It just means there is a better fit elsewhere. And that mentality helps relax me, which makes me better at interviews. Something is out there for you, but you just have to take that step and do it!
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    change is scary... but if staying the same is as bad as it sounds, its worth it, no?
  • RunHardBeStrong
    RunHardBeStrong Posts: 33,069 Member
    What they said! Just do it, once you do you will feel a huge weight lifted! Promise.
  • Pour_Decisions
    Pour_Decisions Posts: 1,053 Member
    I stayed in a miserable job for far too long. I actually would cry on the way to work sometimes. My boss was horrible - a mean, vicious man.

    One day I met a friend for lunch and was telling her how much I hated my job. She said, "Just go back this afternoon and QUIT. You're smart, talented, educated - you can always find another job." Maybe it was the martini (lol) but I did exactly that. What a relief!! I could breathe again. And, without a job I was forced to apply elsewhere. I ended up with almost my dream job, stayed there for 5 years until we had to move away for husband's work.

    Just DO it! you will thank yourself everyday!

    I would not quit without having something lined up because BILLS...but yeah...if you can afford to do that by all means. Just do what make you happy or at least not stressed.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    I stayed in a miserable job for far too long. I actually would cry on the way to work sometimes. My boss was horrible - a mean, vicious man.

    One day I met a friend for lunch and was telling her how much I hated my job. She said, "Just go back this afternoon and QUIT. You're smart, talented, educated - you can always find another job." Maybe it was the martini (lol) but I did exactly that. What a relief!! I could breathe again. And, without a job I was forced to apply elsewhere. I ended up with almost my dream job, stayed there for 5 years until we had to move away for husband's work.

    Just DO it! you will thank yourself everyday!

    you're lucky, i have bills to pay so just quitting wouldn't be an option.
  • gallicinvasion
    gallicinvasion Posts: 1,015 Member
    I stayed in a miserable job for far too long. I actually would cry on the way to work sometimes. My boss was horrible - a mean, vicious man.

    One day I met a friend for lunch and was telling her how much I hated my job. She said, "Just go back this afternoon and QUIT. You're smart, talented, educated - you can always find another job." Maybe it was the martini (lol) but I did exactly that. What a relief!! I could breathe again. And, without a job I was forced to apply elsewhere. I ended up with almost my dream job, stayed there for 5 years until we had to move away for husband's work.

    Just DO it! you will thank yourself everyday!

    Omg this sounds like a dream. I'm so proud of you for that, I feel like I would jump off a cliff before quitting my job if I wasn't sure what my next paycheck would come from. I want to do it though!!
  • gallicinvasion
    gallicinvasion Posts: 1,015 Member
    Do you have a LinkedIn page? If not I recommend getting one. If so, be sure to keep it updated. Any job I’ve had was through headhunters on LinkedIn. It takes some of the panic away when you know you already meet some of their requirements. But to be honest, going new places is hard. It’s the what if that gets us. But you also won’t know unless you take the leap and I think that is the bigger loss.

    I do have one, I try to keep it fairly updated. I've SmartApplied to a few easy things but I really need to start doing things in earnest.
  • gallicinvasion
    gallicinvasion Posts: 1,015 Member
    No, you should NOT just quit. You will be looked upon far more favorably by potential employers if you are currently employed. I do, however, agree with others who have said to find a way to get those resumes out there.

    I do not recommend working for a small, paper company. Even as assistant to the regional manager. It is NOT as glorious as one might imagine.

    Dwight is the only person I would take career advice from! Thanks!
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  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    I suggest a daily cruise of opportunities. I like INDEED.com. When you see an amazing job, apply.

    The job ads give me a sense of what in my resume I want to highlight. I do my best to understand what the prospective employer wants.

    Maybe have a few sample paragraphs made up highlighting some of your accomplishments and strengths.

    Before you leave your job, have a frank conversation with your boss on why they lost you. Who knows? They might learn from the experience.
  • TravisJHunt
    TravisJHunt Posts: 533 Member
    Why stay somewhere you aren't happy. Life's too short and it doesn't sound like there's too much good other than a cheque. And that's not even great. I've stuck it out at jobs that suck but usually its because I'm being paid way better than I should so I put up with the BS. But if the pay sucks too, isn't it better to be underpaid and happy than underpaid and miserable?
  • 4legsRbetterthan2
    4legsRbetterthan2 Posts: 19,590 MFP Moderator
    I agree change is scary, but that does not mean you should avoid it. Start looking. Set some goals. I will apply for one job this week. Make yourself do it.

    When you think about yourself 5 years down the road how do you feel about sitting in the exact same place, with an extra 5 years of misery under your belt? That is a pretty bleak future, make it change!

    Ask a friend for help. Having someone else read over your stuff before you send it out is a great idea anyways, maybe they can also help you get the ball rolling.

    Good luck!
  • emmies_123
    emmies_123 Posts: 513 Member
    I agree with those saying you should take the plunge. I was in a similar boat at my last job and it took over 6 months for me to finally start looking on Indeed. I was just too scared to step away from the comfortable *kitten* I knew to start over again in a new place. It took about 3 months but I got accepted to a position that is much less stressful, and has better pay and benefits so score! To date I have only worked for small companies, and the "family" around you can make or break your workday. Even on my most stressful days at new job my husband still tells me (and family) that I have been coming home so much happier at my new place.

    I will warn you that on Indeed you are not being rejected UNLESS you get a message that "company x has reviewed your application" and then see no action from them. I did not learn this until about a month into the search, thought I wasn't being accepted anywhere. Turns out they were just getting so many they never even looked at mine!
  • gallicinvasion
    gallicinvasion Posts: 1,015 Member
    jgnatca wrote: »
    I suggest a daily cruise of opportunities. I like INDEED.com. When you see an amazing job, apply.

    The job ads give me a sense of what in my resume I want to highlight. I do my best to understand what the prospective employer wants.

    Maybe have a few sample paragraphs made up highlighting some of your accomplishments and strengths.

    Before you leave your job, have a frank conversation with your boss on why they lost you. Who knows? They might learn from the experience.

    This is wonderful advice!
  • BoosDimples
    BoosDimples Posts: 2,826 Member
    Just do it. I wouldn't quit until you find something else but what have you got to lose? Most people spend the majority of their time at work. Why be stressed and miserable. You'll never know what's out there for you until you get out and look. Good luck!

    This! I was in the same situation as you. I took a leap of faith and feel much happier for it.
    We spend most of our waking lives working, so being miserable for most of our lives when we can do something to change that makes sense. It’s scary, but, rarely worth regretting. Work out your worst case scenario and plan from there. Good luck.🙂
  • gallicinvasion
    gallicinvasion Posts: 1,015 Member
    Update! I GOT A NEW POSITION! Better pay, better benefits, more meaningful work, and a great location! Thank you all for helping and being supportive. Just sent in my resignation letter to my current employer and he’s “surprised” at such a “wonderful member of the team” leaving in December!
  • rdevol
    rdevol Posts: 278 Member
    woo hoo! Good luck!