Gaining Weight Again, Want to cry

singingflutelady

Have you considering talking to your doctor about your self hatred and disordered thinking? You have been posting like this for quite a while https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/comment/35399469#Comment_35399469 (this is from 2016) and I am worried about you.

snickerscharlie

TasteofEnvy wrote: »

It's been a while MFP...
When I started my journey back in 2013 (I believe) I was 180lbs. I worked really hard and lost so much weight... it took a while, but I made it to my goal, 120 lbs. I was so happy. At one point I had extreme anxiety, which prevented me from eating, so I went down to 114lbs. As I got more comfy eating I fluctuated between 121 and 123 lbs; that fluctuation was for a good year and a half.
Recently, my boyfriend moved in with me... I let his laziness, snacking habits, and unhealthy eating habits influence me. It's only been a month and I'm now 127 lbs. I am one pound away from being overweight again. During this month I could feel the fat creeping up on me; my breasts got bigger (which I really don't want or need), I'm growing an *kitten* (which is nice, but I don't want a bubble butt), my thighs and stomach jiggle when I walk, and my calves are huge... I tried going to the gym, but I can't motivate myself to anymore. It used to be so easy; when I originally lost weight I was on campus and could easily walk to the gym, and healthy portioned food was available. My current gym is nearby, within walking distance, but I don't want to walk alone and get frustrated at the idea of wasting gas driving. I've tried convincing my boyfriend, who is lucky to just have a decent metabolism, to go to the gym with me... but he never goes. I've tried convincing him to eat healthier with me... but no... he needs his snacks...

I'm so mad. I want to cry. I can't believe I'm getting fat again. I don't want this. But I have no motivation. I've even tried packing gym clothes to change into after work, which I did for a week... but in the end I'm just so exhausted (I stand cash register and stock items for 8 hours a day), I want to go home. I also tend to eat pretty healthy, but as I said, the snacking has become a problem... I have zero self-control around food; so if someone else has food, I want to eat too.

I want to lose 17 lbs, 10 being the bare minimum.

Help me out MFP. Help me learn to motivate myself again. Give me tips on what you did to lose weight in a decent amount of time (for instance, MFP is telling me it may take til october for me to lose 3 lbs... yea... no... i want faster than that, if possible).

Get a new boyfriend?

Seriously, though. No one can motivate you but you, and losing too weight quickly will guarantee a rebound. Sounds to me like you're not really ready to do this, because if you were, you'd be doing it.

Yes, the boyfriend isn't helping, but it's your 'journey' and not his.

jogetsgains

singingflutelady wrote: »

Have you considering talking to your doctor about your self hatred and disordered thinking? You have been posting like this for quite a while https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/comment/35399469#Comment_35399469 (this is from 2016) and I am worried about you.

Good advice ☝️ get some help with your root cause analysis

TasteofEnvy

elsie6hickman wrote: »

No one can motivate you but yourself. It sounds like a lot of whining to me. If you lost a lot of weight before, you know what you have to do. Start logging your food. Getting fat again is your choice, not a given. And there will always be an excuse why you did, but at the end of the day, you are in control. Get busy!!

I feel like whining would be more like "ohmyyygaaaaawd i sit on the couch all day and eat nothing but carbs i dont want to go to the gym cuz its haaaard so dont tell me to do that and dont tell me to eat veggies cuz those are gross!!! But how can i lose weight without calorie counting?"

Pretty sure what im doing is stating my concerns, explaining what my predicament was, obstacles in my way, and asking for words of motivation and support.

I understand that tough love can work on some people but i feel like there is a huge difference between tough love and just being rude.

I am clearly, very clearly, working on a solution. Not just "whining" as you put it.

TasteofEnvy

singingflutelady wrote: »

Have you considering talking to your doctor about your self hatred and disordered thinking? You have been posting like this for quite a while https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/comment/35399469#Comment_35399469 (this is from 2016) and I am worried about you.

Ive def seen doctors since then, and have been working on my self image issued. But, due to years of backstory, this is obviously going to take a lot of time. HOWEVER, if you read what i said and my comments to others, i eventually say that i was eventually okay with the weight I had. While i still dont fully love myself, I am very very proud of myself for getting down to a healthy weight, maintaining that same healthy weight for a long time, and being able to realize when i should act upon this current issue before not only reaching a point of being overweight but also hating myself all over again.
I would love to continue seeing a doctor for these issued, but i literally just lost my health insurance early in august and am waiting to hear back from the insurance i applied for thank you so much for being concerned about my mental and emotional health though

TasteofEnvy

snickerscharlie wrote: »

TasteofEnvy wrote: »

It's been a while MFP...
When I started my journey back in 2013 (I believe) I was 180lbs. I worked really hard and lost so much weight... it took a while, but I made it to my goal, 120 lbs. I was so happy. At one point I had extreme anxiety, which prevented me from eating, so I went down to 114lbs. As I got more comfy eating I fluctuated between 121 and 123 lbs; that fluctuation was for a good year and a half.
Recently, my boyfriend moved in with me... I let his laziness, snacking habits, and unhealthy eating habits influence me. It's only been a month and I'm now 127 lbs. I am one pound away from being overweight again. During this month I could feel the fat creeping up on me; my breasts got bigger (which I really don't want or need), I'm growing an *kitten* (which is nice, but I don't want a bubble butt), my thighs and stomach jiggle when I walk, and my calves are huge... I tried going to the gym, but I can't motivate myself to anymore. It used to be so easy; when I originally lost weight I was on campus and could easily walk to the gym, and healthy portioned food was available. My current gym is nearby, within walking distance, but I don't want to walk alone and get frustrated at the idea of wasting gas driving. I've tried convincing my boyfriend, who is lucky to just have a decent metabolism, to go to the gym with me... but he never goes. I've tried convincing him to eat healthier with me... but no... he needs his snacks...

I'm so mad. I want to cry. I can't believe I'm getting fat again. I don't want this. But I have no motivation. I've even tried packing gym clothes to change into after work, which I did for a week... but in the end I'm just so exhausted (I stand cash register and stock items for 8 hours a day), I want to go home. I also tend to eat pretty healthy, but as I said, the snacking has become a problem... I have zero self-control around food; so if someone else has food, I want to eat too.

I want to lose 17 lbs, 10 being the bare minimum.

Help me out MFP. Help me learn to motivate myself again. Give me tips on what you did to lose weight in a decent amount of time (for instance, MFP is telling me it may take til october for me to lose 3 lbs... yea... no... i want faster than that, if possible).

Get a new boyfriend?

Seriously, though. No one can motivate you but you, and losing too weight quickly will guarantee a rebound. Sounds to me like you're not really ready to do this, because if you were, you'd be doing it.

Yes, the boyfriend isn't helping, but it's your 'journey' and not his.

nah, im good with the one I have. And while it isnt "his journey", part of being a couple is supporting each other. While it would be ridiculous of me to tell him he can never have junk food and he needs to start measuring his food like I do, I dont think im asking too much for him to be a little more health conscious around me during this time. Not to mention, his decent metabolism is going to eventually slow down and hes going to eventually need to learn to be healthier haha

And I'm sorry but where in the world are you (and a few others) getting the idea that Im "not ready for this" or "I'd be doing it"???? Are you in my house, following me around my life, and seeing my every move? No, obviously not; cuz if you were you'd see that -since- the morning after I posted this ive been measuring portions, gone back to counting calories, meal prepping, looking up healthy recipes that my bf and I can BOTH enjoy, and looking up/purchasing healthier snack options for the both of us for when he gets back. Have I gone to thr gym yet? No. But i can proudly say thats been less of a lack of motivation and more of me being crazy busy at both of my jobs, plus graduate school. But even with just a few days of back to my controlled eating, I feel great (and have lost a pound ). My next challenge is upon my boyfriend's return, which i am ready to face.

As I've already stated, this is a forum to help give motivation and support. And while i know that, in the end, we are in charge of the final act of motivating ourselves, people can still empower each other with support... and while I totally understand that tough love is a thing and it does work with some people, it seems some of you are confusing tough love and just being plain rude, accusatory, and confrontational.

jenilla1

gstaubs1 wrote: »

...Hit the gym and run until you want to puke...

I'm a runner myself, but this sounds like terrible advice. It sounds like punishment, which to me, is counter-productive.