Any Over Eaters Annonymous Peeps? Curious about it?

dumb_blondes_rock

Just kidding, you aren't allowed to say! Haha!

I went to my first meeting yesterday (I'm breaking some step I believe, by even admitting that I went), and it was, for the most part, a positive experience for me. There was about 6 of us, 3 of us were new, and we had to write for 10 mins, journaling I would rather call it, and after 10 mins we had the opportunity to share. Some lady, well into her 50s, if not 60s, shared that she has gained all her weight back, she's depressed, she's been struggling with this illness for 35 years, always yo-yoing and how upset she is with herself and now she has full blown diabetes. I have only been alive 31 years and I cannot imagine spending the better part of my long adult life compulsive eating, hating myself for it, yo-yoing...but if I dont change something, I will be the lady in that writing!

Something sweet she wrote is how her husband told her how proud he is that she never gave up, and maybe has lost some battles, but never stopped fighting the war, which made her happy because she feels like such a let down to her family for letting herself go and always having to restart. The point is, she keeps trying!

One thing I had to get used to is how religious it is. I mean, I get it, because we can't do it "alone", but a god, spirit, whatever universe form you believe in, is the main focus of recovery (from my understanding. I could be wrong.) They also believe in abstinence(food wise, not sex wise haha), which I learned from psych class that repression is one of the worst self defense mechanisms...so that I'm a little iffy about, but we shall see!

When I got to my lowest(165. Currently 190), I never could imagine letting myself get back to the person I was. It is a LOT easier than I thought. It takes me babystep after babystep for me to make any progress, but when I spiral, I go hard! I decided I would go to o.a. to try a new approach to dieting, because my binging gets out of control, and I am slipping back into my old bad habits! I know im damaging my body, inside and outside, but I can't get the voices wanting to eat out of my head! I live alone, so I don't even have to eat in secret. The only secret I have to keep is sneaking it into my house, so the neighbors don't see. It's such a shameful feeling, to even be worried that the homeless people digging through your trash might be looking and judging at all the takeaway, candy, and other stuff I have been eating left and right. I know they probably could give two rats behinds about my takeaway, but it's the shame of my illness that makes me suspect everyone is judging.

I just thought I would write my experience, just in case anyone was curious about going, but nervous about what it entailed. It was nice to hear people experience similar things as I do, and there are people of all different shapes and sizes there. You can even go to a meeting online, or on the phone! You get a chip for your first time, and you get random chips for different accomplishments of abstinence . Everyone was so friendly and very open!

THERE IS NO SHAME IN GETTING HELP. There is more shame of dying due to health complications you could have avoided by a lifestyle change, rather than admitting you have an eating disorder and seeking help for it.

hoppgeorge

Thank you for sharing that

cnave99

The point behind the anonymity is that you can say your part (by admitting you went) but that you shouldn’t break others anonymity- like how you told her share (presumably without her permission)