Being happy with who I am

MrsRachaelFisk1

Now that you're in maintenance, does anyone here ever have little lapses where they feel uncomfortable not dieting anymore?

After losing 42lbs for my wedding last year, I've been trying to find a way I can maintain my weight without having to "diet" as extremely.

I'm really struggling to get the "you need to be smaller" voices out of my head. I worked so hard and it became such a big part of my life. I've stopped weighing myself as a first step towards living more normally, but it's hard to lose those weight loss habits.

Can anyone relate? What did you do to get those demons to go away?

neugebauer52

I tend to always feel happy, regardless of my weight - BUT: I never feel healthy, agile, flexible and easy to move about with my weight. (started on 170 kg, 375 pounds). After 170 days of small changes, a healthier lifestyle and a much better meal plan (thank you MFP!!!) I have lost 23 kg - about 48 pounds and I am slowly starting to feel better. Little lapses do happen once in a while but I look at the greater picture (actually my own smaller picture), take it meal by meal, day by day. I have no idea what my "ideal weight" would be and so far this doesn't bother me at all. As long as I'll feel healthy one day and fit into clothes a "Mr. average" would wear.

CarvedTones

My comfort level with "not dieting" (which I will interpret as "eating at a deficit" to sidestep the semantic debate about whether or not it is appropriate to call it "dieting" ) is low because I am historically not very good at it. I have only been in maintenance under 7 months and already had a few episodes of starting to overeat again and having to put the brakes on. I haven't gone over my set limit and sometimes I over react to spikes. Anyway, I can relate and in my case i am not sure the demons are going away. I have to keep weighing and reacting to an upward trend but eating at a deficit again.

LivingtheLeanDream

Was your diet extreme? did you lose weight very quickly?

Maintenance is just like losing, we just get to eat more calories so I suppose it always feels like I'm basically on a 'diet' as such, but that term only applies because I still think in terms of calories in and out and keeping the balance right to maintain. But even when I was losing I ate a good amount of calories and was happy with a slower loss so I can't say I felt deprived and it certainly wasn't extreme.

I know where you're coming from about those voices telling you you need to be smaller, I still get those too, and I'm at maintenance 5 years! that's just something we might have to keep working on, quietening that inner voice. Most of the time I can quieten it but sometimes I can't - thankfully the majority of the time I am extremely happy with my progress.

I still weigh myself daily, I will not stop doing that - not weighing myself is what led to weight gain to begin with. Using a trending weight app really helps me keep perspective.

My lose weight goals became fitness goals - perhaps that's something you could now look at?

CSARdiver

Years ago I read "Happiness is a Serious Problem" by Dennis Prager. Since then I look at happiness and the pursuit much differently. Instead of a fleeting psychological state I see this much more as a moral characteristic and achievement.

We are happy when we have purpose. This purpose is fulfilled by setting goals, establishing a plan to achieve these goals, and developing a series of habits to ensure the plan and therefore, our purpose is fulfilled.

To put it simply - it's not the destination, but the journey.

I dumped all notions of "extreme" change. These are unsustainable and demonstrably lead to failure every time. What works are small changes in behavior which yield dramatic results over time.

spiriteagle99

I feel like I'm still dieting, just as much as I did to lose the weight. Yes, I get more calories so manage to get more treats, but I've learned that if I don't monitor what I eat, my occasional treats become daily ones which always ends up with me gaining weight. I've done the yoyo thing all my life. I'd rather lose 5 pounds than try to lose 40, so I know I need to pay attention now, while I'm in maintenance, rather than try to start the weight loss journey over again.

As to goals, I'm a runner who likes to do occasional races. I put in the training so I see good results. ie. I qualified for and ran Boston last spring. That is sufficient motivation to both keep my weight down and continue to exercise daily.

GaleHawkins

MrsRachaelFisk1 wrote: »

Now that you're in maintenance, does anyone here ever have little lapses where they feel uncomfortable not dieting anymore?

After losing 42lbs for my wedding last year, I've been trying to find a way I can maintain my weight without having to "diet" as extremely.

I'm really struggling to get the "you need to be smaller" voices out of my head. I worked so hard and it became such a big part of my life. I've stopped weighing myself as a first step towards living more normally, but it's hard to lose those weight loss habits.

Can anyone relate? What did you do to get those demons to go away?

@MrsRachaelFisk1 maintenance has been going fine for the past three years but I am still eating the same types and amounts of food when I was 50 pounds heavier.

Being 63 with fast failing health I realized weight loss and keeping it off was not going to happen after 40 years of yo-yoing weight so I totally took weight loss off of the table and went to work to improve my health markers on each annual physical. I lost 50 pounds the first year without trying and have maintain that loss for the past three years without thought to how much I eat because when I get hungry I just eat all that I want. While still eating high calorie my current WOE cut out my cravings and binging enabling eating all that I want when I want it for the past four years. At 67 last month the doctor said she saw no red flags health wise and to continue on my current track to stay Rx Med free and continued good health.

I now know there are no real demons outside of my head but the cravings leading to binging seemed so real until they left 4 years ago. Best of success in finding your own way since we all are different with different eating needs.

xbowhunter

Everyone is different but for me being mindful of what I eat will never stop. I have gained a few pounds over the last few weeks. Its time for me to tighten up my consumption of the good stuff & get back on track!

elisa123gal

My approach is different. I regained a few pounds this summer when I stopped weighing myself and took a mental break from the scale.


The past four weeks I've buckled down to lose my regain. I still have-not weighed myself.. but I almost look like I want to . I have another pound or two on my stomach. When I visually look the way I want. I'm stepping on the scale..and that's going to be my goal weight. From then on. I'm weighing myself all the time so I never get another weight creep. I've done that so many times.

I'm tired of long periods of having to diet..and chasing goal weights picked from the sky. I just want to move on with my life and put all this energy of dieting into something else productive. Also..nothing is better than being thin and able to buy clothes and look like yourself. That does make me happy. yo yo ing.. and regaining all the weight would be depressing.

hesn92

maintaining my weight takes effort. It's a lot easier than losing but still takes effort and I can't just go back to how i was before, and the weight will magically stay off. I have taken steps to make my life easier and make maintaining my weight be less time-consuming, (and mind-consuming, more like). I have developed habits and routine that allows me to maintain my weight without fretting about and logging every single calorie. I stopped logging my food on MFP about 2 months ago and so far so good. But I am still very much aware of what and how much I'm eating and I'm still very mindful of it.

hesn92

I think maybe OP deleted her account.