I want to, I know I should, but I just don’t care

shilowindy

Here’s the skinny of it (no pun intended.)
I need to lose weight. I want to lose weight. At the same time, I just don’t care.
I flip flop between midnight and afternoon shift. My days off are usually the day I finish a midnight shift, so I’ll work midnight on Monday into Tuesday and Tuesday is considered my “day off”. Then on Wednesday I switch to afternoon shift and then back to midnight on Thursday. I am tired all of the time. I want to lose weight and I need to but I am so tired that I just don’t care. I eat whatever I can grab and try to sleep as much as possible. I just need help. I don’t really know how to get back into it. I lost 30 pounds back in 2014-2015 and then my dad passed and I slowly started gaining weight back. I’ve started and stopped more times than I can count. I feel awful about myself all the time. I don’t like who I see when I look in the mirror. I need to lose weight and I want to, but I don’t know how to overcome. Any advice will be appreciated.

TavistockToad

http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/818701/the-myth-of-motivation-and-what-you-need-instead/p1

shilowindy

Thank you. All of that really hit the nail on the head.

countcurt

Well, let's talk terminology for a moment.

Weigh less: a state of being in which one's weight is lower than it once was.

Lose weight: an action by a person in which they make changes necessary to create a caloric deficit in their bodies in order to weigh less.


You clearly want to weigh less. Perhaps you need to weigh less. What I don't see is that you want to lose weight. Because to lose weight (healthily) you need to be an active participant. And, yes, it's often difficult. And takes energy/work, which means it competes with your brain power, time, and other life activities.


You don't need motivation. What you need are specific reasons you want/need to lose weight (knowing why you don't want to make the changes necessary to lose weight or why you might not want to weigh less is also very important and part of the 'two list' methodology), and a plan. Then you need to follow that plan.

Simple. Just not easy.

cheryldumais

It sounds like you're in a catch 22. You're tired and maybe even a bit depressed so you eat badly which makes you tired and overweight and depressed. The best way out of it is to start slowly making changes. Often times people try an all or nothing approach to weight loss then get frustrated and give up. You may have done a cycle or two of that and now the thought of going through it again makes you feel hopeless. First off start slow but START. Don't try to lose 4 pounds a week. You say you need to lose 30 pounds? Then go for a .5 to 1 pound a week goal. This should give you a decent amount of calories to work with. You don't need to go to the gym for 2 hours a day either. Add some activity into your day when you start to feel better. Find something you enjoy. For me it was a daily walk. I started really slowly with 4,000 steps/day but I didn't even do that until about 4 or 5 months in to my lifestyle change. As you change you will begin to feel better. But trying to do everything perfect all at once is overwhelming and very rarely successful. Good Luck. You did it before and you can do it again you just need to make it something you can live with if you want to maintain it.

shilowindy

Thank you everyone. I do have trouble with the all or nothing approach. I have a terrible habit of trying to do everything at once and then when I stumble I give up all together. It’s like there’s two sides of me competing, the one who wants to lose weight and feel better and the one who says forget it who cares. Today I went for a 3 mile walk with my dog and it was quite nice.

100_PROOF_

I remember feeling just like that. I now know that this won't work until you are truly ready. Otherwise you might be left spinning your wheels. For a very long time I hated how I looked but just couldn't muster up the ambition to really give it 100%.i wasn't ready at that point.
when I was finally ready there was nothing in the world that could stop me! When I was finally ready I did what I needed to do without thinking twice.
Don't fret though, you'll get there. Keep trying and don't give up.

elisa123gal

you are trading water, working shifts that keep you tired all the time. Hey, a weight loss journey takes planning and work..and a lot of energy. Don't beat yourself up. If you could make it a priority to get a set work schedule or change jobs if that were possible. that would be the first step in setting yourself up for success.

I bet if you were well rested and on a schedule you could implement a weight loss plan to match your desire to lose.

shilowindy

elisa123gal wrote: »

you are trading water, working shifts that keep you tired all the time. Hey, a weight loss journey takes planning and work..and a lot of energy. Don't beat yourself up. If you could make it a priority to get a set work schedule or change jobs if that were possible. that would be the first step in setting yourself up for success.

I bet if you were well rested and on a schedule you could implement a weight loss plan to match your desire to lose.

I know that I could. When I initially lost the weight, I was in college with a set school and work schedule so I knew when I had time to hit the gym and when to mela plan. I’ve already requested to be set to straight afternoon shift. I don’t necessarily want afternoons but it’s a sacrifice I need to make to get my health back in check.

emhorn625

I was the same. Started and stoppped so many times. One day it just clicked (an upcoming wedding helped too). You have to work on it. Maybe pre-prep meals so you have something to grab before or after work.

Snowflake1968

Wow you are me. Shift work sucks and that is one of the worst schedules I have ever seen. I have been a scheduler or in operations managing schedulers for over 20 years and trust me that is the worst! Obviously when you are switching from nights to afternoons and back again your body is struggling just to have energy to work your shift. I get it!

I too lost my Dad and gained my weight back, plus just for good measure decided I would even add more than what I had lost. I sunk into a depression so deep I just fought to get out of bed and go to work.

Do you know what has helped me? I decided to be grateful. Grateful for the tiniest little things. A roof over my head, the sun shining, (I still struggle to find the positive in a rainy day), my family. Somedays I struggle to find the positive but I dig deep and do it. After a month or so of that I started forcing myself outside for 15 minutes a day. Just 15 minutes I could do that! I didn't even have to do anything when I went out, just get out. Before I knew it I was walking for those 15 minutes, then longer and longer. I started tracking my food using MFP in February I did nothing else. 95% of the time I reach my goals and stay in the green, the other 5% I'm over but I'm losing and I'm happier than I have been in years.

Tiny little steps at a time you will get there if you want to. Just change one thing a month if that is all you can commit to. It may take longer to get there, but you are moving in the right direction.

I'm very curious what you do for a living that has that schedule? How do employees work at peak performance with those rotations? Here in Canada studies have been done about rotations like that and most companies have done away with them.

Good luck to you, add me as a friend if you would like.

jhilkene

Sounds exactly like me!!
I work 6 nights a week, and suffer from sleep deprivation. It makes getting motivated SUPER difficult. I've also been back and forth (several times) with eating better and being fit, to just letting it all go.
As difficult as it is, you can do it!
Start small.
Even if you can't get into an exercise routine, work on logging foods. Grab healthier snacks, bananas, apples. A calorie deficit will help shed some pounds, and eating better may lead to more energy for a small workout. Don't give up on feeling better!!

shilowindy

Snowflake1968 wrote: »

Wow you are me. Shift work sucks and that is one of the worst schedules I have ever seen. I have been a scheduler or in operations managing schedulers for over 20 years and trust me that is the worst! Obviously when you are switching from nights to afternoons and back again your body is struggling just to have energy to work your shift. I get it!

I too lost my Dad and gained my weight back, plus just for good measure decided I would even add more than what I had lost. I sunk into a depression so deep I just fought to get out of bed and go to work.

Do you know what has helped me? I decided to be grateful. Grateful for the tiniest little things. A roof over my head, the sun shining, (I still struggle to find the positive in a rainy day), my family. Somedays I struggle to find the positive but I dig deep and do it. After a month or so of that I started forcing myself outside for 15 minutes a day. Just 15 minutes I could do that! I didn't even have to do anything when I went out, just get out. Before I knew it I was walking for those 15 minutes, then longer and longer. I started tracking my food using MFP in February I did nothing else. 95% of the time I reach my goals and stay in the green, the other 5% I'm over but I'm losing and I'm happier than I have been in years.

Tiny little steps at a time you will get there if you want to. Just change one thing a month if that is all you can commit to. It may take longer to get there, but you are moving in the right direction.

I'm very curious what you do for a living that has that schedule? How do employees work at peak performance with those rotations? Here in Canada studies have been done about rotations like that and most companies have done away with them.

Good luck to you, add me as a friend if you would like.

I’m a medical laboratory technologist and my schedule is dreadful. My “routine” schedule is 10:30p-7a Monday and Tuesday, “off” Tuesday, Wednesday 2:15p-10:45p, 1030p-7a Thursday through Sunday, off Monday and Tuesday, 2:15-1045 Wednesday through Friday, off Saturday and repeat.
It’s an awful schedule and my supervisor knows it but refuses to change it. I’ve had other techs and supervisors go to her about it but she refuses to change it. She says that it’s the only way that I can get my full hours (which is not true because there’s two people with less seniority than I with better hours).
When I was first hired, I was promised straight midnight shifts, 10 on 4 off, but after a few months I was bumped by people with more seniority who wanted their schedules tailor made to fit their lives and so they just use me as schedule fodder.
I’ve just recently asked to have my schedule changed to straight afternoon shifts since there’s no longer any open midnights. I prefer midnights, which is what I was hired to work.