Hi. My name is Danielle. I REALLY need your help!! :(

ellebrosseau

People call me "Elle" for short.

I've dieted the wrong way for as long as I can remember. I have "recovered" from disordered eating (ended up underweight) three times, and each time I was told to diet properly afterward. Unfortunately, I always fall back into not eating to control my weight. I'm currently 147lbs- VERY fat. I need to lose it all again... preferably a lot of it by December. My boyfriend is in the military and is coming home from a visit, and last time he saw me I was close to underweight. I can't face him like this.

I'm tempted to just stop eating again. I have the willpower to do it... but I don't have the willpower to stop once I've started!

I know I need to do this the right way but don't know how to do it. For me it's always been eat as little as possible, then exercise as much as I can with the energy I have. Even if I start the right way, I'm afraid I'm going to get discouraged and fall back into not eating. My mom's anorexic, and she told me today I need to eat less...

Any tips you guys have would be greatly appreciated! By the way, I'm 18 and a college freshman.

(If you need to know, I used to go three days without eating then eat about 300-400cals, then do it again. That's strongly discouraged though.)

AJ_G

Calculate your TDEE. Subtract 20% from your TDEE. This is the calorie intake you should be consuming daily. Calculate your protein and fat intake and the rest of your calories can come from carbs. Protein should be 0.82g per pound of body weight. Fat should be 0.4g per pound of body weight. Eat WHATEVER YOU WANT that helps you reach your calorie and macronutrient goals. Let me know if you have any questions.

TeresaMarie46

Hello,

First, how tall are you? Because in your pic you definately DO NOT look fat,
in fact, you look wonderful. Many of us are working hard and trying to get
to where you are.

I hope I'm not coming across harshly, not my intention. I'm speaking from
experience. I have gone from Anorexic, to just plain overwieght after having
my children. It appears that you might still be struggling with the "I'm so fat "
syndrome. Please believe me, honey you are NOT fat. Maybe try some toning
exercises, many times that is really all one needs in the end.

Wishing you much success on your journey,
Teresa

AJ_G

Hello,

First, how tall are you? Because in your pic you definately DO NOT look fat,
in fact, you look wonderful. Many of us are working hard and trying to get
to where you are.

I hope I'm not coming across harshly, not my intention. I'm speaking from
experience. I have gone from Anorexic, to just plain overwieght after having
my children. It appears that you might still be struggling with the "I'm so fat "
syndrome. Please believe me, honey you are NOT fat. Maybe try some toning
exercises, many times that is really all one needs in the end.

Wishing you much success on your journey,
Teresa

What is a toning exercise?

ellebrosseau

Losing weight is so complicated.

ellebrosseau

Calculate your TDEE. Subtract 20% from your TDEE. This is the calorie intake you should be consuming daily. Calculate your protein and fat intake and the rest of your calories can come from carbs. Protein should be 0.82g per pound of body weight. Fat should be 0.4g per pound of body weight. Eat WHATEVER YOU WANT that helps you reach your calorie and macronutrient goals. Let me know if you have any questions.

This sounds.. unbelievably impossible. I can barely count calories! Why's it important to have macronutrient goals??

hollydesade_

I just messaged you.

ellebrosseau

Hello,

First, how tall are you? Because in your pic you definately DO NOT look fat,
in fact, you look wonderful. Many of us are working hard and trying to get
to where you are.

I hope I'm not coming across harshly, not my intention. I'm speaking from
experience. I have gone from Anorexic, to just plain overwieght after having
my children. It appears that you might still be struggling with the "I'm so fat "
syndrome. Please believe me, honey you are NOT fat. Maybe try some toning
exercises, many times that is really all one needs in the end.

Wishing you much success on your journey,
Teresa

I'm 5'4''. I just know how to dress to look okay. And my brother's a photographer and he knows how to angle a shot. I really am fat. I swear.

Crochetluvr

Hi. I don't want this to seem mean.... it's not. But NO ONE is flawless.... not your boyfriend, not you. Don't strive to look perfect for HIS sake. Look whatever way is healthy, because that's the bottom line. Eat right, exercise moderately and you will be fine. But do it for YOU or you will never really be happy. You are the only one living in your body...no one else.
,

ellebrosseau

Hi. I don't want this to seem mean.... it's not. But NO ONE is flawless.... not your boyfriend, not you. Don't strive to look perfect for HIS sake. Look whatever way is healthy, because that's the bottom line. Eat right, exercise moderately and you will be fine. But do it for YOU or you will never really be happy. You are the only one living in your body...no one else.
,

Valid argument.. I must admit. But I do miss the way I used to look, too. I feel like I would be more confident if when I saw him and his family this December I wasn't packing so many extra pounds!

dilysin

I know BMI are not the be all and end all, but they are a simple indication of where you are at, and it seems that yours is 25.2, which indicates that you don't really need to lose weight. I agree with the suggestion of toning up, develop some killer abs and tight butt , transform your shape (not suggesting that you need to, just putting it out there as a suggestion) and I am sure he will be well impressed, and more importantly you will feel better about yourself.

ellebrosseau

I know BMI are not the be all and end all, but they are a simple indication of where you are at, and it seems that yours is 25.2, which indicates that you don't really need to lose weight. I agree with the suggestion of toning up, develop some killer abs and tight butt , transform your shape (not suggesting that you need to, just putting it out there as a suggestion) and I am sure he will be well impressed, and more importantly you will feel better about yourself.

I'd like my BMI to be much, much lower, but I know that I definitely need to tone up as well. I'm starting running again (a couple months ago I would run a 5k three times a week). I'm not sure what else to do for exercise though? I know my horseback riding is core exercise and tennis is more running.

AJ_G

Calculate your TDEE. Subtract 20% from your TDEE. This is the calorie intake you should be consuming daily. Calculate your protein and fat intake and the rest of your calories can come from carbs. Protein should be 0.82g per pound of body weight. Fat should be 0.4g per pound of body weight. Eat WHATEVER YOU WANT that helps you reach your calorie and macronutrient goals. Let me know if you have any questions.

This sounds.. unbelievably impossible. I can barely count calories! Why's it important to have macronutrient goals??

It sounds more complicated than it is. The point of eating proper macronutrient intakes is because your body needs a minimum amount of dietary fat and protein. The dietary fat intake is important for hormone production, nutrient absorption, and brain and organ function. The protein is for muscle synthesis. Eating adequate protein helps preserve muscle during weight loss, otherwise a good amount of your weight loss will be from muscle which you don't want. If you give me your body fat percentage, I can calculate it for you. It's up to you.

1piewacket

Hi, Danielle,

You have about 17 weeks until December. If you set your MFP goals to lose 1.5 lbs per week, and stuck with a consistent, healthy diet and exercise plan, you could lose 25 lbs by then. I agree about the toning exercises. Have you tried Slim In 6 videos? They're great for that.

Good luck!

AJ_G

Hi, Danielle,

You have about 17 weeks until December. If you set your MFP goals to lose 1.5 lbs per week, and stuck with a consistent, healthy diet and exercise plan, you could lose 25 lbs by then. I agree about the toning exercises. Have you tried Slim In 6 videos? They're great for that.

Good luck!

Nobody answered my question. What is a toning exercise?

maybeazure

You aren't fat at 147 pounds. Based on your BMI, you are very slightly overweight. If you lose 2 pounds you will be a healthy weight. Personally I would consider where you are good enough, but if you would feel better a little lighter, then a healthy diet is a good idea.

If the TDEE thing is too complicated, just eat what MFP recommends. Try to make most of those calories lean protein and fruits and vegetables. Those will fill you up more and you'll be less likely to binge.

Only weigh yourself once a week. Any more than that will make you too anxious because of normal weight fluctuations. Weigh at the same time of day...first thing in the morning is best. Most people are lightest then.

Also consider that if your boyfriend is a decent guy he is not going to judge you for a couple of pounds. Honestly, if he is like most men he won't even notice. He also might think you look better not being underweight.

michiny13

Hey, many of the comments that people have posted are helpful, but please keep in mind that if your boyfriend really love you. he will love you as you are, he should not be caring if you put a little bit of weight. but if you don't feel comfortable with the weight you have now, don't force yourself to lose weight the wrong way for him, I'm quite sure he wont mind helping you loose weight and exercising with you.

Cheers.

antzgreen

i tried a base calorie amount and if i want eat more i need workout first. I either burn the amount of calories before eating again or sometimes dont bother eating because im too lazy to exercise.

MaryJane_8810002

It sounds like you need counseling more than weight loss advice because your numbers are almost perfect. An anorexic mother telling you to eat less is a red alarm.

BTW AJ I think toning is another way of saying " incorporate strength training."

AJ_G

It sounds like you need counseling more than weight loss advice because your numbers are almost perfect. An anorexic mother telling you to eat less is a red alarm.

BTW AJ I think toning is another way of saying " incorporate strength training."

Gotchya, that makes more sense. So basically build muscle, and then cut fat aka build muscle definition. It bothers me when people say you should tone your muscle haha

ziggiezambi

I entered it in an online calculator by December eating 1300 Calories you can make it to 125lb. If you enter that into MFP it will calculate the rest for you. Also if you plan on exercising it will increase the amount of calories you can eat a day. But I think you look fine and I’m sure he won’t notice a few extra pounds.