Marriage is 50/50. Right?
TheRoadDog
Posts: 11,788 Member
in Chit-Chat
Let me preface what happened yesterday, by telling you about our trip to Vegas in August. Wife and I wanted to go to a show in Vegas, Hotel we were staying in had a deal on tickets for the show. Tickets were $189, but, through the Hotel, we got them at $69. $120 savings. So I charged it. Had a great time. Got home. Got the bill. It was for the whole $189. Wife was mad and has been going back and forth with the hotel since October.
Flash forward to the present. We were planning Thanksgiving at home. Guest list was 8. Bought a Turkey, Ham, etc. Then a week ago our daughter asked if she could bring some friends. Okay. Got the list. Her and her friends = 11. Now, we have a Thanksgiving for 19 people. No problem, Told the wife I'd pick up a Prime Rib, some extra stuff and we'd make it work. We went out yesterday to get stuff. I picked up the Prime Rib and some extra serving platters and such. Paid for it. On the way home I realized I forgot Egg Nog. She said to stop at Safeway, she would pay for the Egg Nog and a couple other things. Which came to $189.10. I said I'd pay for it, she said don't worry about it.
We get outside and she said it only cost her a dime, because the Hotel in Vegas had just sent her a debit card for the whole $189 dollars. Not just $120.
Great. I thought, shouldn't I get the Debit card since I paid for it on my credit card. That's what i thought. That's not what I said. I think I said "Great, Honey."
Flash forward to the present. We were planning Thanksgiving at home. Guest list was 8. Bought a Turkey, Ham, etc. Then a week ago our daughter asked if she could bring some friends. Okay. Got the list. Her and her friends = 11. Now, we have a Thanksgiving for 19 people. No problem, Told the wife I'd pick up a Prime Rib, some extra stuff and we'd make it work. We went out yesterday to get stuff. I picked up the Prime Rib and some extra serving platters and such. Paid for it. On the way home I realized I forgot Egg Nog. She said to stop at Safeway, she would pay for the Egg Nog and a couple other things. Which came to $189.10. I said I'd pay for it, she said don't worry about it.
We get outside and she said it only cost her a dime, because the Hotel in Vegas had just sent her a debit card for the whole $189 dollars. Not just $120.
Great. I thought, shouldn't I get the Debit card since I paid for it on my credit card. That's what i thought. That's not what I said. I think I said "Great, Honey."
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Replies
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The idea of seperate accounts is so foreign to me it is hard to relate. Although it seems that any cash inflows are mysteriously directed to the shopping budget
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In most states the statutes require credit card refunds to be applied to the card originally charged...I don't live in Nevada, but if the company is not compliant you really should file a complaint (state consumer commission, maybe)...in theory you have potentially paid interest on that charge and the hotel might be liable to pay you that interest amount given that the amount charged was not the amount you authorized.7
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Call me old school but isn't marriage the joining of two lives...? Including finances?6
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tinkerhellraiser wrote: »TheRoadDog wrote: »Let me preface what happened yesterday, by telling you about our trip to Vegas in August. Wife and I wanted to go to a show in Vegas, Hotel we were staying in had a deal on tickets for the show. Tickets were $189, but, through the Hotel, we got them at $69. $120 savings. So I charged it. Had a great time. Got home. Got the bill. It was for the whole $189. Wife was mad and has been going back and forth with the hotel since October.
Flash forward to the present. We were planning Thanksgiving at home. Guest list was 8. Bought a Turkey, Ham, etc. Then a week ago our daughter asked if she could bring some friends. Okay. Got the list. Her and her friends = 11. Now, we have a Thanksgiving for 19 people. No problem, Told the wife I'd pick up a Prime Rib, some extra stuff and we'd make it work. We went out yesterday to get stuff. I picked up the Prime Rib and some extra serving platters and such. Paid for it. On the way home I realized I forgot Egg Nog. She said to stop at Safeway, she would pay for the Egg Nog and a couple other things. Which came to $189.10. I said I'd pay for it, she said don't worry about it.
We get outside and she said it only cost her a dime, because the Hotel in Vegas had just sent her a debit card for the whole $189 dollars. Not just $120.
Great. I thought, shouldn't I get the Debit card since I paid for it on my credit card. That's what i thought. That's not what I said. I think I said "Great, Honey."
y’all keep your money totally separate?
Not really. We have a household account where money goes into to pay all the household bills. Then we each have our own accounts. I'm on hers and she's on mine, but they are separate and to be used however we feel like it.7 -
Marriage is supposed to be 50/50. However, many think of it more like 80/20.4
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Neither one of us would have flinched/second guessed...
We like to toss the "50/50" thing and say it's 100/100. Waters start getting rough when either one gives less than 100%.. just our view...7 -
anothermfpuser wrote: »Neither one of us would have flinched/second guessed...
We like to toss the "50/50" thing and say it's 100/100. Waters start getting rough when either one gives less than 100%.. just our view...
I'm of the same belief. It's paid off. 3 Decades.3 -
TheRoadDog wrote: »tinkerhellraiser wrote: »TheRoadDog wrote: »Let me preface what happened yesterday, by telling you about our trip to Vegas in August. Wife and I wanted to go to a show in Vegas, Hotel we were staying in had a deal on tickets for the show. Tickets were $189, but, through the Hotel, we got them at $69. $120 savings. So I charged it. Had a great time. Got home. Got the bill. It was for the whole $189. Wife was mad and has been going back and forth with the hotel since October.
Flash forward to the present. We were planning Thanksgiving at home. Guest list was 8. Bought a Turkey, Ham, etc. Then a week ago our daughter asked if she could bring some friends. Okay. Got the list. Her and her friends = 11. Now, we have a Thanksgiving for 19 people. No problem, Told the wife I'd pick up a Prime Rib, some extra stuff and we'd make it work. We went out yesterday to get stuff. I picked up the Prime Rib and some extra serving platters and such. Paid for it. On the way home I realized I forgot Egg Nog. She said to stop at Safeway, she would pay for the Egg Nog and a couple other things. Which came to $189.10. I said I'd pay for it, she said don't worry about it.
We get outside and she said it only cost her a dime, because the Hotel in Vegas had just sent her a debit card for the whole $189 dollars. Not just $120.
Great. I thought, shouldn't I get the Debit card since I paid for it on my credit card. That's what i thought. That's not what I said. I think I said "Great, Honey."
y’all keep your money totally separate?
Not really. We have a household account where money goes into to pay all the household bills. Then we each have our own accounts. I'm on hers and she's on mine, but they are separate and to be used however we feel like it.
I think I like the part where you said, "Great, honey!"
But only if you can let it go....cuz I know a.certain someone who would bring that shot up as.much as possible...and in which case I would pay you double to tell them to shut the front door!😉
Next time she gets a lil something extra maybe you could hint around for new bells and whistles for your bike🤔 sounds fair to me!😎2 -
"We get outside and she said it only cost her a dime, because the Hotel in Vegas had just sent her a debit card for the whole $189 dollars. Not just $120." - along with what @tcunbeliever said, this struck me as odd. Whose name was on the debit card? I find that a strange way to reimburse a credit card charge that was an error.
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TheRoadDog wrote: »anothermfpuser wrote: »Neither one of us would have flinched/second guessed...
We like to toss the "50/50" thing and say it's 100/100. Waters start getting rough when either one gives less than 100%.. just our view...
I'm of the same belief. It's paid off. 3 Decades.
Awesome.. Just about 3 decades for us as well!2 -
well if you are asking "was that fair?' no.2
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My husband and I have one joint account so I would view it as we got a refund and we bought xyz for Thanksgiving dinner even if one of us did it. We do not have equal income but do have equal access to our money so 50/50 only applies to one side.
Sounds like your wife is the one who did the work to pursue that refund for a month and got more back than expected so it does probably feel that it is her refund victory even if you made the initial charge. Regardless you benefit just as much from the refund since it has been used for a mutually enjoyed purchase. Seems like things are pretty even in the end.4 -
"We get outside and she said it only cost her a dime, because the Hotel in Vegas had just sent her a debit card for the whole $189 dollars. Not just $120." - along with what @tcunbeliever said, this struck me as odd. Whose name was on the debit card? I find that a strange way to reimburse a credit card charge that was an error.
Yes, charge should always go back to original card. This is odd.1 -
It's either 100/100 or short for this world.1
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TheRoadDog wrote: »Let me preface what happened yesterday, by telling you about our trip to Vegas in August. Wife and I wanted to go to a show in Vegas, Hotel we were staying in had a deal on tickets for the show. Tickets were $189, but, through the Hotel, we got them at $69. $120 savings. So I charged it. Had a great time. Got home. Got the bill. It was for the whole $189. Wife was mad and has been going back and forth with the hotel since October.
Flash forward to the present. We were planning Thanksgiving at home. Guest list was 8. Bought a Turkey, Ham, etc. Then a week ago our daughter asked if she could bring some friends. Okay. Got the list. Her and her friends = 11. Now, we have a Thanksgiving for 19 people. No problem, Told the wife I'd pick up a Prime Rib, some extra stuff and we'd make it work. We went out yesterday to get stuff. I picked up the Prime Rib and some extra serving platters and such. Paid for it. On the way home I realized I forgot Egg Nog. She said to stop at Safeway, she would pay for the Egg Nog and a couple other things. Which came to $189.10. I said I'd pay for it, she said don't worry about it.
We get outside and she said it only cost her a dime, because the Hotel in Vegas had just sent her a debit card for the whole $189 dollars. Not just $120.
Great. I thought, shouldn't I get the Debit card since I paid for it on my credit card. That's what i thought. That's not what I said. I think I said "Great, Honey."
1. She did the work to get it back so i am in favor of her keeping it as payment for her efforts.
2. She paid for something you said you would pay for and she declined your offer. For $189.10.
Way i see it, you owe her money 😎6 -
does your wife steal from you often???1
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Just for the record. This was supposed to be humorous. Everything I have is because of my wife and is for my wife.11
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Nope. Some days it's 90/10 and some days it's 20/80 but it all balances out
Let it go and just keep with the "great honey" 2 -
TheRoadDog wrote: »Just for the record. This was supposed to be humorous. Everything I have is because of my wife and is for my wife.
So is it a legit scenario?2 -
TheRoadDog wrote: »Just for the record. This was supposed to be humorous. Everything I have is because of my wife and is for my wife.
I knew it was a lighthearted thread, its no secret how much you adore that woman1 -
RomaineCalm wrote: »TheRoadDog wrote: »Just for the record. This was supposed to be humorous. Everything I have is because of my wife and is for my wife.
So is it a legit scenario?
Yes, It all really happened. I just thought it was funny.2 -
Sounds legit to me! But I'm always on the wife-side of those types of outcomes! :laugh:1
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TheRoadDog wrote: »RomaineCalm wrote: »TheRoadDog wrote: »Just for the record. This was supposed to be humorous. Everything I have is because of my wife and is for my wife.
So is it a legit scenario?
Yes, It all really happened. I just thought it was funny.
I still can't get passed the debit card thing. That's why I asked if it was a legit scenario. Makes no sense.0 -
RomaineCalm wrote: »TheRoadDog wrote: »RomaineCalm wrote: »TheRoadDog wrote: »Just for the record. This was supposed to be humorous. Everything I have is because of my wife and is for my wife.
So is it a legit scenario?
Yes, It all really happened. I just thought it was funny.
I still can't get passed the debit card thing. That's why I asked if it was a legit scenario. Makes no sense.
My wife wasn't happy about that either. It was a debit card that couldn't get cashed out and, on top of that, it had an expiration date sometime in 2019. I never would have pursued it and she got more than we should have, so I am fine with it. For what it's worth, we were staying at Polo Towers. A gift from my Sister in Law for our Anniversary.3 -
TheRoadDog wrote: »RomaineCalm wrote: »TheRoadDog wrote: »RomaineCalm wrote: »TheRoadDog wrote: »Just for the record. This was supposed to be humorous. Everything I have is because of my wife and is for my wife.
So is it a legit scenario?
Yes, It all really happened. I just thought it was funny.
I still can't get passed the debit card thing. That's why I asked if it was a legit scenario. Makes no sense.
My wife wasn't happy about that either. It was a debit card that couldn't get cashed out and, on top of that, it had an expiration date sometime in 2019. I never would have pursued it and she got more than we should have, so I am fine with it. For what it's worth, we were staying at Polo Towers. A gift from my Sister in Law for our Anniversary.
I'm glad it worked out in your favor. She sounds like someone not to mess around with
My kinda gal. 1 -
In theory, I love the idea of mine/yours/ours accounts.
In practice, I would screw that up for sure.0 -
That kind of thing happens to my husband all the time.
What?..... I make him sandwiches and bring him beer. <shrugs>
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caco_ethes wrote: »TheRoadDog wrote: »Just for the record. This was supposed to be humorous. Everything I have is because of my wife and is for my wife.
I knew it was a lighthearted thread, its no secret how much you adore that woman
Hear hear...and I'm just a lurker! 2 -
leut_underpants wrote: »Our finances have always been 100% combined. I've insisted on a small account for her with a few thousand dollars in it. That way whether I turn into a jerk overnight and she wants to leave, or she loses her mind and runs out...she won't be instantly homeless. Men are pigs, my mother taught me that. This is my defense against being a pig. I insisted she finish her degree for the same reason. She's well positioned to at a minimum be self supporting if she decides she's done with me.
Otherwise, every decision is together, all the time. The threshold for mutual involvement has moved higher as we've become more prosperous together, but it's still there.
I wonder how the pigs would feel being compared to men. :huh:
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Yep its 50/50 alright. My husband says "My money is your money and your money is your money". Long standing joke for 20+ years of marriage. I handle all the finances anyways.4
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