Friend requests

seendie
seendie Posts: 50 Member
in Chit-Chat
Had a friend request on MFP a couple of days ago, when I accepted it, all I got was this person kept her profile private-But the concern was there was nothing else-no friends attached-no feedback or comments - I felt really uneasy - I defriended. What is this?? Anyone else had a request like this? What did you do with it?

Replies

  • ScatteredThoughts
    ScatteredThoughts Posts: 3,562 Member
    I've had a couple of people do that, for different reasons, but it was a temporary thing for them. Did the person give you any indication of whether they intended to keep their profile private?

    It is hard to interact when things are going in one direction only.
  • seendie
    seendie Posts: 50 Member
    Hi there thanks for replying. I didn't bother asking the question, just defriended, seemed pointless as you say things going in one direction, not what MFP is about.
  • salladeve
    salladeve Posts: 1,053 Member
    Yes I have one friend that has a private profile. We do interact on each others feeds, and I have never asked why it is private, I suppose there must be a reason, so it doesn't really bother me (although I do like to comment on my friends diary).
  • seendie
    seendie Posts: 50 Member
    Oh Ok I just didn't see how I could interact with her, as I could not see anywhere to do that.. Maybe I was a bit hasty Oh Dear..:embarassed:
  • runner2runner
    runner2runner Posts: 1,937 Member
    Had a friend request on MFP a couple of days ago, when I accepted it, all I got was this person kept her profile private-But the concern was there was nothing else-no friends attached-no feedback or comments - I felt really uneasy - I defriended. What is this?? Anyone else had a request like this? What did you do with it?

    Did you ever consider the fact that maybe the person was new and had maybe even only just joined mfp the day you got the friend request? You were probably the first person they friend requested. Hence the empty profile. And as for the profile being private, it's possible that they may not even have been aware of the fact. I once friend requested a lady a few months ago and when she accepted my friend request, I was surprised to see that her profile was still private despite the fact that we were now friends, so I sent her PM alerting her to that. It turned out she wasn't aware that that was the case and she appreciated my feedback and set it to public. I think you were not only hasty in your decision to defriend this person, but a bit too harsh and judgmental too. Sometimes you just have to give people a chance and you probably would have known all those things I've mentioned had you given this person even just half a chance. Anyway, that's my view!
  • elainek79
    elainek79 Posts: 499 Member
    i just this minute got a friend request from a guy i never interacted with before and i sad sure why not...and now i have my answer

    as to why not his first message was the crudest message anyone has ever sent me on here and dont get me wrong i like a bit of

    flirting but come on! maybe a " hello" or " how is your morning going" first would have been good lol
  • ScatteredThoughts
    ScatteredThoughts Posts: 3,562 Member
    Yes I have one friend that has a private profile. We do interact on each others feeds, and I have never asked why it is private, I suppose there must be a reason, so it doesn't really bother me (although I do like to comment on my friends diary).

    Are you sure you don't mean instances where the profile is only viewable by friends? Perhaps something has changed recently, but in the past I could not even see the newsfeed for a person with a private profile; I believe PMs are still an option.
  • salladeve
    salladeve Posts: 1,053 Member
    Yes I have one friend that has a private profile. We do interact on each others feeds, and I have never asked why it is private, I suppose there must be a reason, so it doesn't really bother me (although I do like to comment on my friends diary).

    Are you sure you don't mean instances where the profile is only viewable by friends? Perhaps something has changed recently, but in the past I could not even see the newsfeed for a person with a private profile; I believe PMs are still an option.


    No, I can't view her profile it says "xxxxx has chosen to keep her profile private", however this shows up on my news feed "
    xxxx completed her food and exercise diary for 08/10/2013 and was under her calorie goal". I'm not sure what the settings would be for this, but it does allow interaction, and at times we send PM to each other so it works for us.
  • salladeve
    salladeve Posts: 1,053 Member
    i just this minute got a friend request from a guy i never interacted with before and i sad sure why not...and now i have my answer

    as to why not his first message was the crudest message anyone has ever sent me on here and dont get me wrong i like a bit of

    flirting but come on! maybe a " hello" or " how is your morning going" first would have been good lol


    I really don't understand this type of messaging, what exactly do they expect to accomplish? This is like walking past a man on the street and have him say something crude to you, and then you respond "ok that sounds good lets go", do they really think that women appreciate that kind of approach? or that it actually ever works as an opening line?
  • 43932452
    43932452 Posts: 7,246 Member
    It's happened to me a couple times.
    One at least appeared to be an eating
    disorder person .. I felt weird so now
    I try and get more interaction with my
    friends.
  • billyboybalbo
    billyboybalbo Posts: 156
    unless its a hot girl i dont add/ accept
  • billyboybalbo
    billyboybalbo Posts: 156
    It's happened to me a couple times.
    One at least appeared to be an eating
    disorder person .. I felt weird so now
    I try and get more interaction with my
    friends.

    nice boobs
  • wild_wild_life
    wild_wild_life Posts: 1,334 Member
    Interesting, I didn't know you could keep your profile private from your friends . . . . Not sure what the point of having a profile (or friends) is in that case but to each their own.

    OP, don't worry about it, you can always add them back or PM them explaining that you were confused . . .

    I love the bathtub pic too :)
  • runner2runner
    runner2runner Posts: 1,937 Member
    Interesting, I didn't know you could keep your profile private from your friends . . . . Not sure what the point of having a profile (or friends) is in that case but to each their own.

    OP, don't worry about it, you can always add them back or PM them explaining that you were confused . . .

    I love the bathtub pic too :)

    Indeed you can. I was surprised too when I found out about it. You can set it so that only you can view your profile. I usually alert friends who's profiles are like that in case they're not aware of it, like the example I gave. But I don't judge those who do it by choice because I'm sure they have their reasons.

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