I get mad I can’t eat whatever I want
fastfoodietofitcutie
Posts: 523 Member
I’m a grown adult and know I can’t eat pizza, french fries, cheeseburgers, and ice cream all day but I want to! When does the mindset change where I’m happy eating a healthy meal? I know I can eat small portions of those foods but it’s just not the same.
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Replies
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When you realize that you can eat those things. You just have to have them in the proper proportions for your goals.
There is nothing wrong with anything you listed.32 -
You said a mouthful (pardon the horrible attempt at humor).
All I can offer is that my desire to eat all the things all the time and comfort or soothe myself from boredom or anxiety with food, is not really a desire about food. It's a desire to "feel better" that I am used to using food to fill. Unfortunately I can't offer a magic solution, except that knowing my wish for "more" is really not about the food has helped me short-circuit the habit eating and emotional eating.
Just now, I wanted a sweet treat to ease afternoon anxiety at work. Instead I came here, totted up my calories for the day, synced my fitbit, realized that if I ate a sweet treat I was going to perpetuate my recent pattern of eating over maintenance, and saw your post
here's the deal: I CAN eat whatever I want, I just can't eat whatever I want without eventually buying bigger pants that fit even less well. It's choice I have to make over and over and over...
Good luck and a hug!38 -
You can, you just can't stuff your face with those things.15
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You can eat whatever you want so long as it fits your calories for the day. If it doesn't fit your calories, you could always "bank" or "borrow" extra calories for the week too. I like to have a weekly average for this reason. This way I can enjoy the cheeseburger I'm craving. Even if it puts me over on calories. If I eat a little less in the days leading up to it, or a little less the days after, it evens out. It helps (me) to not have a "good vs bad" or "healthy vs unhealth" mentality on food. Just higher calorie vs lower calorie foods. And foods that leave me feeling sated and happy, and foods that don't last long and leave me hungry. But as soon as I tell myself a food is "off limits" it makes me want it that much more, and then I'll over eat on it later. It takes some trial and error to figure out what foods to eat for best satisfaction and hunger sating. It's different for everyone. But you totally can have whatever you want. Just maybe not as much as you want whenever you want.13
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Crafty_camper123 wrote: »...you totally can have whatever you want. Just maybe not as much as you want whenever you want.
^^^ This!!9 -
You can eat those foods. The notion of “just fit them into your calorie goal” is a little more nuanced. My calorie goal is on the low side-I don’t have room for anything “extra” and I’m not really going to be satisfied (hunger-wise) by the one piece of pizza I could fit (instead of a meal). So I choose to save some calories each day, and have one day when I can be comfortably over my goal (while still meeting my weekly goal). On that day, because of my saved yo calories, I can have a couple pieces of pizza, donuts, ice cream, bacon cheeseburgers, or something else that I typically can’t fit into my goal - and still be under my weekly goal.
As for when the desire to eat “healthy” kick in? For me, it was learning I could eat an entire plate of food plus a salad instead of a small McDonalds cheeseburger. And never eating anything I don’t like. There’s plenty of food in the world-there’s no reason to eat anything you don’t like. It’s a lot easier to eat things you enjoy.
And finding a balance to include the foods that are very calorie dense (and perhaps not very filling) is pretty important too.10 -
As you eat healthy nutrient dense food on your food journey you'll start to want these other items less because you realize how bad it makes you feel. You can still have cheat days on occasion. I don't recommend cheating every week because you'll undo your progress.
I had a cheat day today for the first time in a while and ate waffles for breakfast, tacos at lunch, pot roast and mashed potatoes for dinner and a lot of chocolate and I feel positively awful. I feel bloated and gross and I know tomorrow the scale's going to scream at me when I get on it. So cheat when you must but let the overall picture of your eating plan be a good one.17 -
Make those things yourself and you can absolutely have them. Half my loss of 60 lbs has been filed by HUGE burgers. I just make them myself.
A half pound of ultra lean beef in a large multi grain bun with tons of salad and low calorie thousand island dressing in 550 calories. Makes me full and fits nicely within my 2000 daily calories. Sometimes I cut up some potatoes and micro wave them before putting them in the oven (no fat, just sprinkle with salt). Adds another 150 calories but still fits in nicely.
I'm a man, I tried the salad way and it doesn't work. I'm finding more and more things that will work for me the ret of my life, not for a diet period. I want food that makes me feel full and satisfies my taste buds.13 -
No food should be off limits ...
But once you realize what some foods count as you might look at them differently.
Many restaurants meals are a whole days calories 😳!!You can eat how you choose to but you will only see results when you burn off more calories then you eat .
Input output it’s as simple as that .
Good luck figuring this out, you’re not alone3 -
The problem is something you can't have is always more desirable when you can't have them. The best way I think is to never ban any foods. For the most part eat a balanced diet and things you can't go mad on have on a special occasion or as a treat once in a while not every day5
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Make your own. I can easily fit cheeseburgers, pizza, and fries into my diet as long as I make it myself and watch my portions. This way I can dictate what goes in/on it and how much. Thin crust pizza with lots of healthy veggies and a bit of real cheese? Amazing and healthy and super easy to fit into ones calories.3
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For me, it's never changed. When I'm going well, it's because I'm enjoying the progress and being in control more than I'm enjoying the instant gratification/indulgence.9
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Duck_Puddle wrote: »You can eat those foods. The notion of “just fit them into your calorie goal” is a little more nuanced. My calorie goal is on the low side-I don’t have room for anything “extra” and I’m not really going to be satisfied (hunger-wise) by the one piece of pizza I could fit (instead of a meal). So I choose to save some calories each day, and have one day when I can be comfortably over my goal (while still meeting my weekly goal). On that day, because of my saved yo calories, I can have a couple pieces of pizza, donuts, ice cream, bacon cheeseburgers, or something else that I typically can’t fit into my goal - and still be under my weekly goal.
As for when the desire to eat “healthy” kick in? For me, it was learning I could eat an entire plate of food plus a salad instead of a small McDonalds cheeseburger. And never eating anything I don’t like. There’s plenty of food in the world-there’s no reason to eat anything you don’t like. It’s a lot easier to eat things you enjoy.
And finding a balance to include the foods that are very calorie dense (and perhaps not very filling) is pretty important too.
GET OUT OF HERE WITH ALL THAT NUANCE!!!!
Seriously though... good post.9 -
fastfoodietofitcutie wrote: »I’m a grown adult and know I can’t eat pizza, french fries, cheeseburgers, and ice cream all day but I want to! When does the mindset change where I’m happy eating a healthy meal? I know I can eat small portions of those foods but it’s just not the same.
All of those foods have nutrients and can be part of a healthy diet. You might be happier if you consider your diet as a whole and stop labeling food healthy or unhealthy. Eat food you like. Change your diet more gradually.
Maybe take the emotion out of eating a bit. You will eat differently because you have a goal you want to accomplish. No one is making you give up anything. You are making choices. You decide if it is worth the calories to use them on a big dish of ice cream, learn to like a small dish if ice cream or maybe there is a lower calorie option you also like.
I eat most of the same foods I always did just in appropriate portion sizes for my goal. There was an adjustment but I didn't have to drastically change what I ate just how I ate it. I like a lot of different foods including lower calorie foods so I don't feel like I am deprived if I am eating something lower calorie.
Having a plan helps. I prelog my food and adjust portion sizes to fit my goals. I look at calories first then meeting my protein goal. I try to eat several servings of vegetables or fruits a day. I generally have 100-300 calories for snacks.
I pair higher calorie foods with more lower calorie vegetables. Two pieces of pizza and a salad for example.
I look up nutritional information for restaurants. I can generally find something for 400-600 calories which is a normal lunch or dinner for me.
I reduce calories in foods by using less cheese, less oil, lower fat milk, thinner crust for pizza. I cook a smaller amount and us a food scale at home. I use smaller plates and bowls. I might share an order of restaurant food with someone else if the portion is very large. I might skip rice or bread or french fries if it doesn't fit my calorie count well that day. I drink mostly water or unsweetened tea and save my calories for food.
I increased my activity level so I don't have to eat 1,200 calories a day.
Common sense is that I don't try to have doughnuts, stuffed crust pizza, fried chicken, bacon cheeseburger and a peanut butter shake all in one day. That doesn't mean I never eat those things but realistically I am 45 years old, not getting any taller and not an athlete. I can't eat like someone who runs marathons weekly when I don't run marathons at all. I can't eat like a 6' 4" man daily if I want to be a healthy weight for a 5'4" woman.
Getting mad about how much I can eat isn't very productive.9 -
1) You can make all those things yourself or buy the healthier options. Maybe try a salmon or turkey burger from Trader Joe's (if you have one near). Make the pizza yourself using cauliflower crust and lower fat cheese. Try baked sweet potato fries, halo top or almond milk ice cream. You CAN have all those things as long as they fit into your daily caloric allotment.
2) I sometimes feel the same way but then I remember that eating to much of all those is how I got fat in the 1st place!3 -
For me, it's never changed. When I'm going well, it's because I'm enjoying the progress and being in control more than I'm enjoying the instant gratification/indulgence.
I really hope it was an accident that this was flagged
I can relate to this. When I'm logging carefully, meeting my calorie goal, and making good choices, it gives me a sense of well being and control that I suppose mitigates the need to turn to food.8 -
It's actually unusual in our family if our week doesn't include all of the things that you mention. We often have a burger, fries, & "shake" night at home with an awesome version of a Whopper for a fraction of the calories, Ore Ida fast food fries in the oven, and a fruit & veggie smoothie. I have kids & it's one of our most popular meals. My husband, who is active and a weight lifter and has tons of calories to use, is big on take-out pizza, so we usually have that once a week. I have lower- calorie favorites at every pizza place (often accomplished by choosing a thin crust, but not always), and we try to round out the meal with fresh fruits & veggies. I can also make a 150 cal/slice supreme pizza at home that we often would rather have than take-out. We have ice cream regularly, but keep it to 1 or 2 portion sizes. Our favorite restaurant is a Chinese buffet that we visit once every couple of months (or at least did until they raised the prices substantially). The meal I put together there comes in at about 1000 calories and I just work the rest of my day around it.
Sometimes it's a bummer... we're just never going to be able to eat the way we used to. However, the times I overindulge now, I usually end up feeling really sick or spending a lot of time in the bathroom, so there's powerful incentive not to. 7 -
I try to eat some of these things every week. I usually have a piece of pie, or some cookies, or a glass of wine, or a bowl of gelato, most days. I'll have a piece of pizza instead of three, which is something I can do now without feeling miserable because I've been practicing feeling happy about it for months now. It's a "mind over matter" thing. It's a "wow, I'm developing discipline" thing. Nothing is off limits for me. But like try2again mentioned, if I eat three pieces of pizza now, I feel bloated and unhappy.3
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My mom made her ZOMG-AMAZING from-scratch chocolate chip cookies today and dropped some off at my house. I mean they were still slightly warm when I got home from work. I was in a solid deficit so heck yes I had a couple (taking the rest with me to work to share with my shift tomorrow). They "fit" for me. Not the end of the world and it didn't throw my calorie balance all out of whack or anything because I had a little bit of wiggle room in there for the day. You can indulge without hurting your progress; you just have to do it wisely.
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For me it was deciding what was worth it from a calorie standpoint. Some things I've pretty much stopped eating (can't remember when I last had fries of potato chips) but others I make room for (decent pizza, a good burger, cinnamon rolls). Everyone and their cousin posts here talking about "embarking on their new lifestyle" but having that mindset, one of developing a new normal, is important if you want sustained success.4
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Read Habit by Duhigg. You are giving yourself a reward with all that food. What was the reward for? A hard days work, a bit of comfort? Do some self analysis what all that excess food was doing for you and replace with non food reward.
For instance a proven stress reliever is a good cardio workout right after work. Why don’t we do it? Inertia and habit. Try it and diarize how the workout makes you feel.
One good push out of your comfort zone will lead you to one change after the other.10 -
I get you, OP. I’ve binged on an almost daily basis for most of my life, and any time I’ve tried to lose weight I’ve had to wrestle with the understanding that if I succeeded I wouldn’t really get to...do that? feel that? again. Sometimes I thought I was ready and sometimes I knew I wasn’t, but as long as I missed binge-eating it was always there, waiting for me to slip up.
I started keto, which brought the cravings and emotional eating way, way down into manageable territory. I’ve been doing it for a year, seven months of which have been more or less maintenance, and I’m just lately starting to notice that that yawing chasm isn’t directly under my feet any more.
About 8 months in I started experimenting with moderating and eating intuitively and deviating from the plan and eating spontaneously. I’d always wind up binge-ing again, but it took a little longer and got old a little faster each time. By about 10 months I realized I can count on myself to make mostly good decisions for my body. Now, a couple of weeks away from 12 months, stuffing myself sick on whatever I want honestly sounds repellant. I can easily remember that it wasn’t always, but the appeal is just gone.
At Thanksgiving I barely ate more than I would on a normal day, a while I did have a number of carb-y treats I never eat otherwise, I had sensible portions of them and gave away the leftovers without a second thought. I’m not saying it’ll never happen again. But my relationship with food is the easiest now that it’s ever been, and it just keeps getting easier. I’d have to make my life a lot harder on a consistent basis in order to backslide, and that’s not a thing people normally do.
So...it takes a while. And you have to be happy with the way you’re eating; you have to find something that feels good. It won’t be nearly as good as the “high” of gorging, but as long as it’s enough better than the “low” that follows, it has potential to stick. Best of luck to you, OP.12 -
fastfoodietofitcutie wrote: »I’m a grown adult and know I can’t eat pizza, french fries, cheeseburgers, and ice cream all day but I want to! When does the mindset change where I’m happy eating a healthy meal? I know I can eat small portions of those foods but it’s just not the same.
I have learned to substitute (and enjoy) lower calorie options of my favorite foods. Your menu would be: cauliflower crust pizza with no cheese and vegetables; oven roasted potatoes, black bean burgers, and banana nice cream. In regular portions.10 -
fastfoodietofitcutie wrote: »I’m a grown adult and know I can’t eat pizza, french fries, cheeseburgers, and ice cream all day but I want to! When does the mindset change where I’m happy eating a healthy meal? I know I can eat small portions of those foods but it’s just not the same.
I have learned to substitute (and enjoy) lower calorie options of my favorite foods. Your menu would be: cauliflower crust pizza with no cheese and vegetables; oven roasted potatoes, black bean burgers, and banana nice cream. In regular portions.
I offered some substitution ideas as well, but it's good to note that not everything has to be a substitution and some substitutions are better than others at capturing the "real thing". Personally, cauliflower topped with other vegetables and no cheese is NOT pizza and would be profoundly disappointing and I suspect many would agree with me. But obviously, to each his own.
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I substituted a square of good, dark chocolate for my old Hershey’s bar and I won’t go back. I get ten times the satisfaction for a fraction of the calories.
https://www.nicabm.com/mindless-eating-would-you-notice-if-your-popcorn-was-stale/2 -
Unfortunately it's all about the uniqueness of every single human being. It would be so easy if all of us would react exactly the same, if all of us would have the same trigger points. Over many months (259 days so far) I have come up with a solution I am happy with and I can work with. I found out about my trigger food - BREAD! any kind of bread and just about any amount. I take it easy on overly starchy food stuff and find new ways of replacing them. I also prepare a daily meal plan where I include other food items I really enjoy. I take it meal by meal, portion by portion. I am still learning about portion size control but with the enormous help of MFP and its members I am making slow progress.2
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When you get some weight loss results and maybe start to see your skin look better and get some fitness happening you start to feel a little different about your choices. Until then you have a wonderful brain that's going to have to be your objective and pragmatic leader.7
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MelanieCN77 wrote: »When you get some weight loss results and maybe start to see your skin look better and get some fitness happening you start to feel a little different about your choices. Until then you have a wonderful brain that's going to have to be your objective and pragmatic leader.
Love that!
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I think part of the problem is people's myopic view of what constitutes healthful eating and end up eating plain chicken breasts with broccoli and endless salads. Learn to cook...healthy can be both nutritious and delicious.
Last night I made a white bean and chicken stew that included about 1/2 Lb of New Mexico Hatch green chiles...it was very delicious, nutritious, and good comfort food on a cold and cloudy night. Over the weekend I made a nice lasagna for a dinner party we were hosting. Tonight I'm grilling some flank steak and roasting some potatoes and will have some kind of veg side...probably roasted or sauteed. It will be delicious and nutritious.
I also still love pizza and have pizza night most Friday nights. Burgers I typically grill at home...about once per week during the summer...not a fan of fast food burgers and never have been. If I want a burger out I'll go to one of the local breweries or something.4 -
Someone around here posts a phrase similar to this and I like it, I don't know who it is though:
I can eat whatever foods I want, just not all of them at the same time.
Just because you cant mindlessly pig out on all the things at once doesn't mean you'll never enjoy that one food you really like. You will always have other opportunities to eat that food.
Also I think part of coming to terms with all of this is realizing that happiness/joy in life doesn't only come from food. There are lots of other things in life that make you happy. You can still enjoy life even if you're not indulging in 8 slices of pizza, ice cream, cookies, etc. every day.
I also just feel good about myself when I know I'm living a healthy lifestyle.5
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