How healthy do your kids eat?

dmvbnoslo

"I have really tried to show my overweight 9 yr old how to make healthy choices, she is pretty active in gymnastics and dance. But she is steadily gaining weight. Her 2 best friends are overweight also and that doesnt help matters, because they are always together and their parents let them eat what they want."



I would not worry too much about your daughter. As long as she stays active and eats relatively well, she will grow into her weight. Children have a tendency to grow outward then upward- especially in the preteen years. Being active is a huge key. I would, however, limit time with friends (out of your home) if that involves mindless eating of total junk!
My 9, 23, 24, and 26 year olds eat pretty healthy- my 17 year old, not so much. I try to keep the house stocked with healthy choices, but sometimes it just comes down to trying to find something that they will actually eat.

sjcply

I was hoping my niece would answer - she is doing great with her 7 and 5 yr old. Here are a few suggestions:

No fast food
Buy only healthy items to stock up your pantry and refrigerator
Get the kids involved in making yummy, healthy meals and TREATS
There are many recipes for home made sorbets, healthy sno-cones, cookies and cakes - here and on many other sites
Let the kids choose - if you only have healthy foods in the house - they will choose healthy
Don't make a big deal about eating something they don't like - they have to try everything but if they don't like it that's OK

Good luck!

We already do this, no junk in our house, very limited fast food and if we do it is grilled, no sodas! I only have water, gatorade and milk in my house!
Our issue isnt what to feed them, it is how to deal with the fact that she doesnt want to eat healthy and am I being a horrible mother for pushing it on her. should I just let her be herself even if it is unhealthy!
Thanks for you input!

8turboturtle8

I totally understand where you are coming from. I also have 3 kids (13g, 9b, and 6g). And the younger 2 are normal/thin, but my oldest is and has been a little overweight. I admit that in the past I was not the best example, and I have to work at it everyday. But, like you I am trying to teach her smart healthy habits and limits. She has the 13 year old attitude so it is not easy to see her unhappy or disappointed when I tell her she can not have a "snack" every night or limit the amount of pasta she eats or if I make something that is not something she "likes" but that is healthyier. I apologize to her and tell her it is my fault this is hard on her, that is was my mistakes in the past that led her and myself to make these changes just to be more healthy, not to lose weight so much. Being at this age I don't want to hurt her self image or create unhealthy goals/expectations. I just want her to understand that we were not healthy on the inside, and not focus so much on the outside. It's not easy but I do know that in the end it is better for her. She will understand later and maybe even be thankful. But we have been 'fast food free' for almost two weeks and I think she is starting to accept the changes. Yesterday we didn't have any "normal" dinner food but she didn't want to shop...and when I expected her to say can we just eat out this once she said "I guess we can have eggs for dinner". So we went home and made scrammbled eggs (mixed whole and just whites) with some ham and a little 2% mozzerella, biscuits and watermelon. Not the most balance meal but not cheeseburgers and fries! And as she was finishing she said "if we keep eating like this, maybe we will lose a few pounds". I said maybe, but even if not, we are being healthier. but I think that is all I can offer based on my exp. Best of luck and stay strong.

PS ~ Her Dr. said that diets are not really recommended unless kids are obese...but try to let her grow into her weight. Like maintain the weight while they grow in height and it will even out.

muth3rluvx2

Both of my boys eat healthy - my oldest (10) is a little more of struggle as he likes his carbs! But other than that - they both eat raw fruits and veggies and regularly expand their palets. They love salad, raw carrots, my 7 year old LOVES frozen peas (I mean, right out of the freezer frozen!), apples, pears, pineapple - oddly, neither is particularly fond of bananas or strawberries.

My younger was a struggle for a short time as toddler - he LOVES noodles and he'd try to get out of eating his veggies in favor of his pastas. It got to a point that he would not get his noodles until AFTER he ate his meat and vegetables. It took being a little resiliant to get over the hump, but once he did it was all good.

See, the mistake that you all are making (and this isn't a judgement - it's an observation based on what you said in your posts) is that you're allowing the child be in absolute control... "My xxx year old won't eat if (s)he doesn't get blah blah blah..." Nonsense. They have you fooled and well trained, Moms!

If you let them get away with it, it will continue unchecked. For those of you who have older children where the habits are fairly ingrained at this point, a little more compromising will be needed rather than flat out telling. Offer sliced apples and peanut butter or honey and 8 oz glass of water - and AFTER that, THEN they can have the pizza rolls and soda, if they still want it. Or celery and cream cheese, etc.. have these things ready and prepared..... my kids will actually ask for these things by name or ask if they can prepare them themselves. For those of you that have kids 5 and younger - START NOW!! Put your foot down - no noodles, dessert, or chips until those fruits and veggies are eaten and NOT EVERY DAY!

One thing that really disturbs me is seeing little kids with colas... really? Seriously?? Why not just give 'em fully loaded coffee??? I'm dead serious. Soda has more sugar and caffeine than a typical (ie: weak.. lol) cup of coffee. I'm a coffee addict - I know the hazards and know I can counteract them if I choose - but these are CHILDREN - they don't get that caffeine is addictive (try explaining addiction to a 6 year old!) and dehydrating. So, mom's.. cut out the sugary drinks and if you must have the kool aid, cut the sugar down - ALOT or get "diet" brands. Keep the soda out. Once in a very great while is fine... by the way, sugar is addictive, too. Additionally, we CRAVE sugar when we're hungry. Take care of the appetite first and the desire for sweets goes down.

I am not one of those super great SAHM's or anything - in fact, my parenting skills leave alot to be desired in alot of ways... but eating healthy and balanced in my house (for my kids) is really just not a question. When my 10 year old comes home from dads, where he often has free access to carbs, fats and sugars, he's finally figured out that butter sandwiches at mom's is not going to happen. Having buttered bread with certain meals is one thing.. but you're not going to live on it. Not in my house.

When they were both little, something that helps was for them to have their own snack drawers/shelves that they could get whatever they wanted out of those places. In the fridge's snack drawer were fruits, cut veggies, cheese sticks and other healthful finger foods. In the pantry there were granola bars, trail mixes (many of which *also* have M&Ms), dried fruit, peanut butter, wheat crackers and things like that. Everything else requires assistance, permission or is not permitted before dinner.

Oh, and water. My kids don't get anything sweet to drink before they have a glass of water and they only get 1 glass of the sweet stuff. After that, it's water, milk or 100% juice. My 7 year old, as a result, is a water addict. If given the option of soda or water, of course he'll pick the soda.... but he doesn't complain when I put a stop to it and tell him he needs to have water from that point forward. He gets it. Doesn't mean he wont' drink 3 glasses of water and then ask for another cup of soda.. once in a while, I'll permit that.

It's all about developing the habits. As a result, I have NO guilt or much resistence to them having their ice cream, cookies, or occasional candy. I know they're eating right 95% of the time so I don't feel the need to deny them the goodies. I just watch how much and when they get it.

I really hope this helps some of you truly struggling. I'm happy to offer more if anyone wants it. :-)

TabiHerbalifeCoach

oops

sjcply

"I have really tried to show my overweight 9 yr old how to make healthy choices, she is pretty active in gymnastics and dance. But she is steadily gaining weight. Her 2 best friends are overweight also and that doesnt help matters, because they are always together and their parents let them eat what they want."



I would not worry too much about your daughter. As long as she stays active and eats relatively well, she will grow into her weight. Children have a tendency to grow outward then upward- especially in the preteen years. Being active is a huge key. I would, however, limit time with friends (out of your home) if that involves mindless eating of total junk!
My 9, 23, 24, and 26 year olds eat pretty healthy- my 17 year old, not so much. I try to keep the house stocked with healthy choices, but sometimes it just comes down to trying to find something that they will actually eat.

thank you!! I have control of what she eats at home, it is at her friends house and school that I have not control over. She sees her friends getting and eating what they want, and thinks it is unfair that she cant get that too! and her friends parents just let them have whatever they want. You are right I do need to limit her time with them.

TabiHerbalifeCoach

I was hoping my niece would answer - she is doing great with her 7 and 5 yr old. Here are a few suggestions:

No fast food
Buy only healthy items to stock up your pantry and refrigerator
Get the kids involved in making yummy, healthy meals and TREATS
There are many recipes for home made sorbets, healthy sno-cones, cookies and cakes - here and on many other sites
Let the kids choose - if you only have healthy foods in the house - they will choose healthy
Don't make a big deal about eating something they don't like - they have to try everything but if they don't like it that's OK

Good luck!

We already do this, no junk in our house, very limited fast food and if we do it is grilled, no sodas! I only have water, gatorade and milk in my house!
Our issue isnt what to feed them, it is how to deal with the fact that she doesnt want to eat healthy and am I being a horrible mother for pushing it on her. should I just let her be herself even if it is unhealthy!
Thanks for you input!

I am perfectly fine with being the horriable mother that pushes it on them...a drastic comparission ...but if they are tempted to drink alchol I am also gonna be the horriable mother that pushes NO to that also.... There are lots of things in their life, I am going to have to be the horriable mom for and I think that this is just as equal to any of those when I think of all the pain that I have gone through, the feeling ugly, not good enough being made fun of depression unwelcome you name it if i can help save them from going down that road, and it means i'm a horriable mom to them so be it. Thats just me though

sjcply

Both of my boys eat healthy - my oldest (10) is a little more of struggle as he likes his carbs! But other than that - they both eat raw fruits and veggies and regularly expand their palets. They love salad, raw carrots, my 7 year old LOVES frozen peas (I mean, right out of the freezer frozen!), apples, pears, pineapple - oddly, neither is particularly fond of bananas or strawberries.

My younger was a struggle for a short time as toddler - he LOVES noodles and he'd try to get out of eating his veggies in favor of his pastas. It got to a point that he would not get his noodles until AFTER he ate his meat and vegetables. It took being a little resiliant to get over the hump, but once he did it was all good.

See, the mistake that you all are making (and this isn't a judgement - it's an observation based on what you said in your posts) is that you're allowing the child be in absolute control... "My xxx year old won't eat if (s)he doesn't get blah blah blah..." Nonsense. They have you fooled and well trained, Moms!

If you let them get away with it, it will continue unchecked. For those of you who have older children where the habits are fairly ingrained at this point, a little more compromising will be needed rather than flat out telling. Offer sliced apples and peanut butter or honey and 8 oz glass of water - and AFTER that, THEN they can have the pizza rolls and soda, if they still want it. Or celery and cream cheese, etc.. have these things ready and prepared..... my kids will actually ask for these things by name or ask if they can prepare them themselves. For those of you that have kids 5 and younger - START NOW!! Put your foot down - no noodles, dessert, or chips until those fruits and veggies are eaten and NOT EVERY DAY!

One thing that really disturbs me is seeing little kids with colas... really? Seriously?? Why not just give 'em fully loaded coffee??? I'm dead serious. Soda has more sugar and caffeine than a typical (ie: weak.. lol) cup of coffee. I'm a coffee addict - I know the hazards and know I can counteract them if I choose - but these are CHILDREN - they don't get that caffeine is addictive (try explaining addiction to a 6 year old!) and dehydrating. So, mom's.. cut out the sugary drinks and if you must have the kool aid, cut the sugar down - ALOT or get "diet" brands. Keep the soda out. Once in a very great while is fine... by the way, sugar is addictive, too. Additionally, we CRAVE sugar when we're hungry. Take care of the appetite first and the desire for sweets goes down.

I am not one of those super great SAHM's or anything - in fact, my parenting skills leave alot to be desired in alot of ways... but eating healthy and balanced in my house (for my kids) is really just not a question. When my 10 year old comes home from dads, where he often has free access to carbs, fats and sugars, he's finally figured out that butter sandwiches at mom's is not going to happen. Having buttered bread with certain meals is one thing.. but you're not going to live on it. Not in my house.

When they were both little, something that helps was for them to have their own snack drawers/shelves that they could get whatever they wanted out of those places. In the fridge's snack drawer were fruits, cut veggies, cheese sticks and other healthful finger foods. In the pantry there were granola bars, trail mixes (many of which *also* have M&Ms), dried fruit, peanut butter, wheat crackers and things like that. Everything else requires assistance, permission or is not permitted before dinner.

Oh, and water. My kids don't get anything sweet to drink before they have a glass of water and they only get 1 glass of the sweet stuff. After that, it's water, milk or 100% juice. My 7 year old, as a result, is a water addict. If given the option of soda or water, of course he'll pick the soda.... but he doesn't complain when I put a stop to it and tell him he needs to have water from that point forward. He gets it. Doesn't mean he wont' drink 3 glasses of water and then ask for another cup of soda.. once in a while, I'll permit that.

It's all about developing the habits. As a result, I have NO guilt or much resistence to them having their ice cream, cookies, or occasional candy. I know they're eating right 95% of the time so I don't feel the need to deny them the goodies. I just watch how much and when they get it.

I really hope this helps some of you truly struggling. I'm happy to offer more if anyone wants it. :-)

WOw and thanks! again this is really not my problem, we only have healthy food in our house and we only drink water, milk and gatorade. Sodas are only on occasion as well as fast food. But I appreciate you taking the time to say all of this, because so many parents do struggle with giving their kids what they want....like my dtrs friends do!
THanks for so many post on this subject...I am having a hard time reading all of them!

sjcply

My heart goes out to you. It sounds like you are very stressed by this issue. I have an 8 yo daughter. I also coach young girls (8-12 yo) through a program called Girls on the Run.

I believe it is super important to lead by example with our kids. You are taking great care of yourself and they are watching you. By your actions alone, you are showing them to do as I do not just as I say.

Once kids get older it also helps to have someone outside the home who is a positive role model spend time "showing" your children as well. Unfortunately, children reach an age where they will accept more information from someone who does not live with them. Have you considered enrolling your daughter in a program like Girls on the Run?

I am lucky that I have never had to make my daughter eat healthy. She just does. Because I know that she eats very healthy at home, I am ok with her eating things we don't eat when she is at a friends or at school. If she is eating healthy 80% of the time, I am happy with what I call the 80% rule.

Hope this helps. Pm me if you would like someone to talk to...

Thanks, I have not heard of Girls on the run before, but will check it out!

sjcply

I was hoping my niece would answer - she is doing great with her 7 and 5 yr old. Here are a few suggestions:

No fast food
Buy only healthy items to stock up your pantry and refrigerator
Get the kids involved in making yummy, healthy meals and TREATS
There are many recipes for home made sorbets, healthy sno-cones, cookies and cakes - here and on many other sites
Let the kids choose - if you only have healthy foods in the house - they will choose healthy
Don't make a big deal about eating something they don't like - they have to try everything but if they don't like it that's OK

Good luck!

We already do this, no junk in our house, very limited fast food and if we do it is grilled, no sodas! I only have water, gatorade and milk in my house!
Our issue isnt what to feed them, it is how to deal with the fact that she doesnt want to eat healthy and am I being a horrible mother for pushing it on her. should I just let her be herself even if it is unhealthy!
Thanks for you input!

I am perfectly fine with being the horriable mother that pushes it on them...a drastic comparission ...but if they are tempted to drink alchol I am also gonna be the horriable mother that pushes NO to that also.... There are lots of things in their life, I am going to have to be the horriable mom for and I think that this is just as equal to any of those when I think of all the pain that I have gone through, the feeling ugly, not good enough being made fun of depression unwelcome you name it if i can help save them from going down that road, and it means i'm a horriable mom to them so be it. Thats just me though

you are right....I need to be her parent first, friend second!

sherry_80

My kids therapist told me to take temptation or remove the bad things i dont want my kids to do. It will avoid wanting and tantrums.
so i only have bottled water and i mix there apple juice with water and its very small amount of juice. just enough to give the water taste. I only keep healthy snacks, i dont introduce any thing that would throw off the balance. My daughter has made it clear me she does not want to be fat, and she likes how she eats. she's very picky, everything has to be separated.

kechiemc

My heart goes out to you. It sounds like you are very stressed by this issue. I have an 8 yo daughter. I also coach young girls (8-12 yo) through a program called Girls on the Run.

I believe it is super important to lead by example with our kids. You are taking great care of yourself and they are watching you. By your actions alone, you are showing them to do as I do not just as I say.

Once kids get older it also helps to have someone outside the home who is a positive role model spend time "showing" your children as well. Unfortunately, children reach an age where they will accept more information from someone who does not live with them. Have you considered enrolling your daughter in a program like Girls on the Run?

I am lucky that I have never had to make my daughter eat healthy. She just does. Because I know that she eats very healthy at home, I am ok with her eating things we don't eat when she is at a friends or at school. If she is eating healthy 80% of the time, I am happy with what I call the 80% rule.

Hope this helps. Pm me if you would like someone to talk to...

Thanks, I have not heard of Girls on the run before, but will check it out!

Hang in there! You can do this. Your daughter deserves this. Also think about the gift (energy to live life, free of illnesses related to poor diets, etc.) that you will be giving future generations of your family.

Girls on the Run is international with programs all over the US and Canada.
Here is the link to the website: www.girlsontherun.org
Our mission: Educating & preparing girls for a lifetime of self-respect and healty living

losingnow

I have two picky eaters. they are 8 and 5. I try to have healthy choices for them but they are so far down on the weight scale that I actually have to find ways for them to get more calories. I do not talk about my weightloss in front of my daughter though. She is 5 and when I first started this I used to talk about it all the time. Now I don't because my 5 year old kept asking me if she was fat and wouldn't eat certain foods or take seconds cause they would make her fat. I do not want my children to grow up with a fear of being fat. Everyone is beautiful just the way they are. I am doing this for health purposes only not to be thin and I am trying to teach my children that also.

kiffypooh

bump

Laceylala

Unfortunately, my son doesn't eat healthy at ALL. He is only 2.5 years old and he just will not eat a vegetable to save his life. He eats bananas, and that's about the extent of his fruit consumption. I generally give him whatever he wants, because I fear he will just not eat at all if I don't and he's already underweight for his age. I do worry about it in the future, because I feel like I am creating bad diet habits but I really don't know what else to do at this point.

I wouldn't worry at 2.5 years. My daughter has always been a underweight and the doctors always said to not worry myself with it. When your son is hungry he will eat what you provide. I finally stopped trying to "fatten" up my daughter with whole milk and letting her eat anything she wants. She eats what we cook for the most part. I don't push healthy food on her too much I just try to lead by example. Luckily, she wants to do just about anything that I do. I even got her taking shots of aloe juice even though we both think its pretty gross.

I too stopped trying to get my daughter who is almost 4 to gain weight because she is underweight. For over two years she went to a daycare in a home with a lady who just loved her to death but all she fed the kids was fried stuff, boxed stuff, etc. When I took her out of there to put her into a preschool she had a hard time afjusting to eating packed meals because I made her healthy stuff. Even when she was in the daycare, she'd ask for chicken nuggets and fries constantly. We'd give in but learned early on as well that if we let her have what she wanted all the time, then she would rarely ever touch the veggies and fruit on her plate.
It took a while but now she eats what we put out or it gets saran wrapped for when she is hungry. I don't expect her to finish her plate but if she wants snacks, etc. then she needs to eat what I make her for the main meals. Now she eats fruit and veggies like they are going out of style. And also doesn't mind the healthier (gluten free) breads and pastas that we have to make her for her dietary needs.
Be patient and keep trying.

LuckyLeprechaun

I was hoping my niece would answer - she is doing great with her 7 and 5 yr old. Here are a few suggestions:

No fast food
Buy only healthy items to stock up your pantry and refrigerator
Get the kids involved in making yummy, healthy meals and TREATS
There are many recipes for home made sorbets, healthy sno-cones, cookies and cakes - here and on many other sites
Let the kids choose - if you only have healthy foods in the house - they will choose healthy
Don't make a big deal about eating something they don't like - they have to try everything but if they don't like it that's OK

Good luck!

We already do this, no junk in our house, very limited fast food and if we do it is grilled, no sodas! I only have water, gatorade and milk in my house!
Our issue isnt what to feed them, it is how to deal with the fact that she doesnt want to eat healthy and am I being a horrible mother for pushing it on her. should I just let her be herself even if it is unhealthy!
Thanks for you input!

I am perfectly fine with being the horriable mother that pushes it on them...a drastic comparission ...but if they are tempted to drink alchol I am also gonna be the horriable mother that pushes NO to that also.... There are lots of things in their life, I am going to have to be the horriable mom for and I think that this is just as equal to any of those when I think of all the pain that I have gone through, the feeling ugly, not good enough being made fun of depression unwelcome you name it if i can help save them from going down that road, and it means i'm a horriable mom to them so be it. Thats just me though

you have to be careful with this type of approach. My parents were like this and when I got out on my own, fast food (ahhh the forbidden treasure) came to be a part of my daily life because I was kind of making up for lost time. I never learned balance because my parents were SO strict with it. In a way, this was great, because I was always a slim and healthy kid, but as an adult, it left me without the skill of saying yes only sometimes. I learned these lessons in my thirties, instead of as a teenager. I could've avoided the 20+ lbs I gained when I FINALLY had access to fast food, kool aid, etc if only I had learned from my parents how to balance and enjoy things in moderation. .

EboniA

Great discussion. My daughter is 6 and son 5. Dad was soooo skinny in high school so both kids are too. She is a junk food junkie and he is a health nut. :laugh: I definitely sneak in the veggies for her but what really helped is the after-school program (anyone but mom & dad) to show her how eating healthy can be fun. She loves to read food labels even though she would still choose cake over fruit. She's always asking if such-and-such is healthy. When I say it's not, she usually puts in down. I also buy sugar free stuff for my mom since she's diabetic. Popcicles, ice cream, cookies, flavored water, juice. I don't even mind them having those options later in the day. Summer is fun because of all the fruit and grilling and thank god they both love salad!

I think sometimes we are too rigid in how we try teach them things. I would suggest playing a game with food labels, like saying you can pick any snack that has less than 5 sugars or less than 150 calories.

Holton

Your kids will eat what you purchase and provide them with, so it really is in your court. I think it would be a shame to allow your child to become overweight as it becomes a life challenge and a major health issue, not to mention affecting self esteem. I don't think you have to be preachy about it, just serve lean meats, whole wheat pastas, an assortment of vegetables and fruits, and only put healthy choice snacks in your pantry. Then when your family is out and about, you can splurge on an ice cream or something your family particularly likes. Do your best as a parent to offer your kids healthy food.

creativefrugalmom

"I have really tried to show my overweight 9 yr old how to make healthy choices, she is pretty active in gymnastics and dance. But she is steadily gaining weight. Her 2 best friends are overweight also and that doesnt help matters, because they are always together and their parents let them eat what they want."



I would not worry too much about your daughter. As long as she stays active and eats relatively well, she will grow into her weight. Children have a tendency to grow outward then upward- especially in the preteen years. Being active is a huge key. I would, however, limit time with friends (out of your home) if that involves mindless eating of total junk!
My 9, 23, 24, and 26 year olds eat pretty healthy- my 17 year old, not so much. I try to keep the house stocked with healthy choices, but sometimes it just comes down to trying to find something that they will actually eat.

thank you!! I have control of what she eats at home, it is at her friends house and school that I have not control over. She sees her friends getting and eating what they want, and thinks it is unfair that she cant get that too! and her friends parents just let them have whatever they want. You are right I do need to limit her time with them.

I understand your frustration. You might just have to overlook the friends' house, or send her with snack for all of them (tortilla chips and salsa aren't too bad, or granola bars, etc.) As far as school, my teens like taking their lunch, simply because they have more time to hang out with their friends instead of in line. Approach her about taking her lunch. They have some really awesome lunchbags now that are "fashionable" and look like purses and she can pick out food to take. My kids take PB&J with celery, sandwich and carrots with ranch dressing, wraps with rice cakes, etc. There are several things that she would be able to choose from by doing this and hopefully it would steer her in the right direction for making good choices, but give her accountability as well.