Wat do I do? (Struggling to lose weight)
Sparkle097
Posts: 83 Member
Basically yesterday and today I binged. I hate myself. I was on a weight loss journey. For the past 2 weeks I’ve been eating good and working out well. Yesterday I ate so much crap and today as well. Tomorrow and Saturday I have parties to go to. I dnt want to but I’m being forced to go cause they are family parties. I’m assuming there’s gonna be a lot of junk food. On Sunday is my mums birthday. So there’s gonna be cake and we gonna have a mini party for her. I want to get back to track but it’s hard to continue in the next 3 days cause of all these parties. Idk what to do. I really wanna lose weight. I only have 20 pounds to lose. I keep losing willpower!!!!! When I see junk food, I wanna eat them.
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Replies
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It seems like this is a constant issue for you. How many calories are you eating the rest of the time?
You may do better to raise your intake to a *reasonable* level -- AKA, none of this 1200 or less nonsense. That will help reduce the urge to binge, and will result in you taking in fewer calories overall.21 -
collectingblues wrote: »It seems like this is a constant issue for you. How many calories are you eating the rest of the time?
You may do better to raise your intake to a *reasonable* level -- AKA, none of this 1200 or less nonsense. That will help reduce the urge to binge, and will result in you taking in fewer calories overall.
😔 Yeahh. Well currently I’m eating 1400 cals a day to lose 0.2kg per week. Mannn the struggle is real0 -
I dnt know why I binge. Like when I see junk food, I just wanna eat them. I’m not even hungry5
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Sparkle097 wrote: »I dnt know why I binge. Like when I see junk food, I just wanna eat them. I’m not even hungry
I know sometimes if I’m too strict with junk food I will go crazy once I get some. So I eat them in moderation. I know, it’s such a mind of matter thing for me.5 -
Maybe enter the food you are planning to eat into your MyFitness app 1st, and then if you still want to eat it, go ahead... at least you will be accountable, and this my help you control eating the entire bag of chips, vs just a few.6
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You may be emotional eating, or you may eat if you feel uncomfortable (such as in social situations like the ones you have coming up). I know that I like to eat when I'm bored. I'm not hungry...I just like to feel like I have something to do with my time. When you have the urge to binge eat, grab a notebook and pen instead. Jot down what you're feeling in that moment. This may help you to understand why you want to binge eat.4
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I am an emotional eater as well. I also use it to avoid situations, kinda of how you feel about those parties. I don't know why or how to control it completely either but you are definitely not alone in this struggle. If just writing down how you feel does not help (because if you are like me you don't even know how you are feeling in that exact moment) then shoot me a message. Sometimes having a person who can actively listen and understand as well as give you interactive feed back may help.0
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It sounds like you are getting enough calories? you are saying eating to much? If you know your eating too much exercise it of after the parties or to next day. When you put the food on your plate think of it as the more exercise you have to do Just to stay at the weigh your at. and when you get back on track you have not got a big amount of weight to lose where it might feel impossible . So that piece of cake will be 20 minutes fast biking . Try it7
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@quiksylver296 ..interesting. I just read another post on that very topic. I also came across a post stating that some people overeat due to the fear of not being able to eat the foods that they like because their diets are too restrictive.5
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FaithfuLEEfit wrote: »@quiksylver296 ..interesting. I just read another post on that very topic. I also came across a post stating that some people overeat due to the fear of not being able to eat the foods that they like because their diets are too restrictive.
Yep. If I try to cut chocolate or ice cream out of my diet completely, I will freak out and binge. I allocate 200-300 calories every night for chocolate or ice cream.6 -
@quiksylver296 I do the same for snacks. I understand how the OP must feel. I'm trying to eat less bread because I love it a little too much. I passed by someone in the hallway at work who had a biscuit, and I could smell it through their bag. I felt like a vampire that had just smelled blood. I wasn't even hungry. I had just denied myself bread for so long that I had to have some. So I saved room for a slice of pizza that night. It satisfied me and, I didn't go over my calories too much.8
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Sparkle097 wrote: »Basically yesterday and today I binged. I hate myself. I was on a weight loss journey. For the past 2 weeks I’ve been eating good and working out well. Yesterday I ate so much crap and today as well. Tomorrow and Saturday I have parties to go to. I dnt want to but I’m being forced to go cause they are family parties. I’m assuming there’s gonna be a lot of junk food. On Sunday is my mums birthday. So there’s gonna be cake and we gonna have a mini party for her. I want to get back to track but it’s hard to continue in the next 3 days cause of all these parties. Idk what to do. I really wanna lose weight. I only have 20 pounds to lose. I keep losing willpower!!!!! When I see junk food, I wanna eat them.
When I see junk food I want to eat it, too. I lost the bulk of my weight during what I call "the year of weddings." Everyone I know got married that year. Seriously, I had 4 weddings to attend, plus bridal showers, bachelorette parties, cake tastings, birthdays, Christmas, everything. Here are some things that helped me. They may or may not help you. The important thing is to figure out why you're feeling so out of control and adapt the various strategies that work best for you.
1. Preplan parties and expect to have a taste of everything. I may not know everything that's going to be at an event, but I can expect certain staples at my friends' parties like cake, chips, buffalo chicken dip, etc. and log them ahead of time. This helps me to feel less deprived when I get there. I can still have all of these things, just not as much as I might have had. It helps me feel a little more in control, as well.
2. Eat lighter on party days to leave room for treats or allow myself to go up to my maintenance level of calories on special occasions. It's your mum's birthday. One day at maintenance won't kill your diet.
3. Log the good days and the bad. The idea is to break the all or nothing mentality. Sometimes I think I've ruined my diet and I log everything and discover that I'm right at goal or a little under still by the end of the night. And if I am over, I will know what my weekly calories look like and can make informed decisions about the rest of my days. I might eat a little less the other days to make up for it.
4. Watch out for the binge/restrict cycle. You don't have to punish yourself for eating off plan. You don't have to restrict or exercise those calories away. It's just one day. It's just food. It's a normal occurrence. Forgive yourself. Keep moving forward. This one is hard for me but it gets easier with practice.
5. Build some fun into my food plan. I get a candy bar every Monday. I get ice cream after dinner most nights. I include comfort foods like macaroni & cheese still. I add chocolate chips to my Greek yogurt. I figure that I'm going to have to learn how to moderate these foods eventually. I might as well include them while I'm losing and see how it goes.
6. Delaying tactics. "I can have that, but not for an hour (or whatever amount of time works best for you)" Sometimes, the craving passes and I forget about it. Sometimes it doesn't, but I can eat in a more controlled manner when the hour passes.
7. Craving redirection. "Sure I want a candy bar, but this pb& chocolate protein bar is going to be great, too." Focus on what you know you already have planned. Think about how it's going to taste, etc. It might help take the edge off of some of those cravings.
8. Urge surfing: https://www.rasa.org.au/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/Urge-Surfing_FINAL.pdf
9. HALT: Don't let yourself get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired. These are times when our willpower is at it's lowest and you're less likely to make the best decisions.
10. Set realistic goals. Are you trying to lose 20 pounds in 10 weeks or less? Are you trying to keep your calories as low as you can or skipping your earned exercise calories? I found that for me, the lower I tried to keep my calories the harder it was to make any food decisions. I was starving and hangry the whole time. Taking a time limit off of my weight loss was a game changer.
11. Overall, be kind to yourself and take your time. Most of us don't get it right on the first try. These are all strategies you can learn and practice if they work for you. If these don't work, then other strategies will. Just keep going. Keep trying. Keep practicing. Keep learning. Eating is a lifelong process There's no rush to get it all perfect right away.
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jasonpoihegatama wrote: »It sounds like you are getting enough calories? you are saying eating to much? If you know your eating too much exercise it of after the parties or to next day. When you put the food on your plate think of it as the more exercise you have to do Just to stay at the weigh your at. and when you get back on track you have not got a big amount of weight to lose where it might feel impossible . So that piece of cake will be 20 minutes fast biking . Try it
Exercise as a punishment for eating isn’t the healthiest approach.
I understand that moving more burns more calories and a workout can help negate a portion of a calorie overage. But using exercise in a punitive manner is not a particularly healthy long-term mindset.
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Sparkle097 wrote: »Basically yesterday and today I binged. I hate myself. I was on a weight loss journey. For the past 2 weeks I’ve been eating good and working out well. Yesterday I ate so much crap and today as well. Tomorrow and Saturday I have parties to go to. I dnt want to but I’m being forced to go cause they are family parties. I’m assuming there’s gonna be a lot of junk food. On Sunday is my mums birthday. So there’s gonna be cake and we gonna have a mini party for her. I want to get back to track but it’s hard to continue in the next 3 days cause of all these parties. Idk what to do. I really wanna lose weight. I only have 20 pounds to lose. I keep losing willpower!!!!! When I see junk food, I wanna eat them.
One of the helpful mental tricks I pulled on myself was to change some labels I was using for food.
Food is not ever , to me, good or bad.
Managing the Quantity of food, otherwise known as portion control, is the effort I focus on.
Do the math to be sure your daily calorie targets are accurate for your height, weight, gender and weight goals.
Weigh and log you food religiously every day.
Eat whatever you want - within your calorie budget.
Patience: what piled on over ttime takes time to peel off.
Good luck5 -
I feel you completely Hun.. I had two parties to go to last week which involved alot of cocktails.. The day after was when I binged on junk.. Then my son and I got a cold and then came the binge eating to make myself feel better, then the guilt eating because I hadn't gone to the gym and I ate too much... It's such a tough road, I believe we have the power within us, we just have to really picture our goal every day...
Anyone and everyone please add me! I'd love to have some more motivation and people to motivate ❤️3 -
Thank u everyone for ur advices💗 I just need to eat these things in moderate. Hopefully I’ll lose 20 pounds end of April.2
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diannethegeek wrote: »Sparkle097 wrote: »Basically yesterday and today I binged. I hate myself. I was on a weight loss journey. For the past 2 weeks I’ve been eating good and working out well. Yesterday I ate so much crap and today as well. Tomorrow and Saturday I have parties to go to. I dnt want to but I’m being forced to go cause they are family parties. I’m assuming there’s gonna be a lot of junk food. On Sunday is my mums birthday. So there’s gonna be cake and we gonna have a mini party for her. I want to get back to track but it’s hard to continue in the next 3 days cause of all these parties. Idk what to do. I really wanna lose weight. I only have 20 pounds to lose. I keep losing willpower!!!!! When I see junk food, I wanna eat them.
When I see junk food I want to eat it, too. I lost the bulk of my weight during what I call "the year of weddings." Everyone I know got married that year. Seriously, I had 4 weddings to attend, plus bridal showers, bachelorette parties, cake tastings, birthdays, Christmas, everything. Here are some things that helped me. They may or may not help you. The important thing is to figure out why you're feeling so out of control and adapt the various strategies that work best for you.
1. Preplan parties and expect to have a taste of everything. I may not know everything that's going to be at an event, but I can expect certain staples at my friends' parties like cake, chips, buffalo chicken dip, etc. and log them ahead of time. This helps me to feel less deprived when I get there. I can still have all of these things, just not as much as I might have had. It helps me feel a little more in control, as well.
2. Eat lighter on party days to leave room for treats or allow myself to go up to my maintenance level of calories on special occasions. It's your mum's birthday. One day at maintenance won't kill your diet.
3. Log the good days and the bad. The idea is to break the all or nothing mentality. Sometimes I think I've ruined my diet and I log everything and discover that I'm right at goal or a little under still by the end of the night. And if I am over, I will know what my weekly calories look like and can make informed decisions about the rest of my days. I might eat a little less the other days to make up for it.
4. Watch out for the binge/restrict cycle. You don't have to punish yourself for eating off plan. You don't have to restrict or exercise those calories away. It's just one day. It's just food. It's a normal occurrence. Forgive yourself. Keep moving forward. This one is hard for me but it gets easier with practice.
5. Build some fun into my food plan. I get a candy bar every Monday. I get ice cream after dinner most nights. I include comfort foods like macaroni & cheese still. I add chocolate chips to my Greek yogurt. I figure that I'm going to have to learn how to moderate these foods eventually. I might as well include them while I'm losing and see how it goes.
6. Delaying tactics. "I can have that, but not for an hour (or whatever amount of time works best for you)" Sometimes, the craving passes and I forget about it. Sometimes it doesn't, but I can eat in a more controlled manner when the hour passes.
7. Craving redirection. "Sure I want a candy bar, but this pb& chocolate protein bar is going to be great, too." Focus on what you know you already have planned. Think about how it's going to taste, etc. It might help take the edge off of some of those cravings.
8. Urge surfing: https://www.rasa.org.au/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/Urge-Surfing_FINAL.pdf
9. HALT: Don't let yourself get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired. These are times when our willpower is at it's lowest and you're less likely to make the best decisions.
10. Set realistic goals. Are you trying to lose 20 pounds in 10 weeks or less? Are you trying to keep your calories as low as you can or skipping your earned exercise calories? I found that for me, the lower I tried to keep my calories the harder it was to make any food decisions. I was starving and hangry the whole time. Taking a time limit off of my weight loss was a game changer.
11. Overall, be kind to yourself and take your time. Most of us don't get it right on the first try. These are all strategies you can learn and practice if they work for you. If these don't work, then other strategies will. Just keep going. Keep trying. Keep practicing. Keep learning. Eating is a lifelong process There's no rush to get it all perfect right away.
This is fantastic and articulate advice. *claps*1 -
I personally struggle with the same thing...eating too much junk. I was obsessed with food. for my height I am suppose to eat 1200 daily and 1400 to lose weight. All I think about is cooking and trying new foods. Food was the only thing that made me happy. I have finally found a diet that works for me. One that I can actually call a life-style change. Im down 10 pounds already, sure its just water weight it has only been two weeks but I am very happy. Find what works for you0
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Sugar is the enemy. Don't eat any sugar, or foods processed with sugar. Cook a meal every day. Soup, stew, garden salad, chicken, steak, pork. If it's all fresh, you control the ingredients. NO SUGAR. If you make a stew or soup that has to simmer for awhile, make four to six servings and keep it in the fridge for the week or freeze some for the next few weeks. I think you'll find that eliminating the sugar will curb your cravings to eat and you'll find yourself going a longer time between meals. I hope you know how to cook!
John33 -
I feel you. A couple of things I do (I had a baby shower today that I hosted and had similar struggles) ...
1) Purposefully don’t eat as much or anything before the party so your calories pretty much are derived from the food at the party.
2) Set aside some of the food you are dying to eat and allocate for tomorrow’s lunch or your snack in two days, etc. Sometimes I am just excited to eat all this food that I rarely get to eat so I binge! But if I know I will have access to it for tomorrow’s lunch or whatever, I’m okay with being conservative.2 -
Sugar is the enemy. Don't eat any sugar, or foods processed with sugar. Cook a meal every day. Soup, stew, garden salad, chicken, steak, pork. If it's all fresh, you control the ingredients. NO SUGAR. If you make a stew or soup that has to simmer for awhile, make four to six servings and keep it in the fridge for the week or freeze some for the next few weeks. I think you'll find that eliminating the sugar will curb your cravings to eat and you'll find yourself going a longer time between meals. I hope you know how to cook!
John
There's no reason to avoid sugar.14 -
Several here have already given great advice. One of the best things that I have gleamed, I'm an emotional eater also, is BE KIND TO YOURSELF. Sometimes that's the hardest thing to do because the negative committee that meets in our head has a strong voice! We beat ourselves up when we've had a "off the bandwagon" day but the best you can do is dust it off and start again because at least you're starting again! You can do this! This is a great place for motivation and support, feel free to add me, we're all in this together.2
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I binged a lot in high school and some in college. I had the all-or-nothing mentality and saw food as either good or bad. Then I saw myself as good or bad, depending upon what I ate.
My relationship with food is so much healthier now that I understand it's all just energy (calories) and different foods simply have more calories than others, meaning, high-calorie foods aren't bad, but they take a bigger chunk out of your daily calorie allowance. I'm not advocating unhealthy eating, but technically, you can eat anything in the world and you will still lose if you're in a calorie deficit.
Realizing that science has empowered me and changed my life. Eating "junk" does not mean I'm bad, and eating salad doesn't mean I'm good. It's all just food and it's there to be enjoyed in moderation.
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Sugar is the enemy. Don't eat any sugar, or foods processed with sugar. Cook a meal every day. Soup, stew, garden salad, chicken, steak, pork. If it's all fresh, you control the ingredients. NO SUGAR. If you make a stew or soup that has to simmer for awhile, make four to six servings and keep it in the fridge for the week or freeze some for the next few weeks. I think you'll find that eliminating the sugar will curb your cravings to eat and you'll find yourself going a longer time between meals. I hope you know how to cook!
John
So much nope in this post. Sugar isn’t the enemy. Fruits and vegetables have sugar in them. Plus telling someone who struggles with binge eating to heavily restrict foods is a recipe for disaster. Lots of people enjoy cooking but it isn’t a requirement for weight loss or even health.12 -
Speak to people when your losing confidence and it makes it easier to get it back if i think im going somewhere where i might end up binging i fill my stomach with water and im too full to eat0
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Sugar is the enemy. Don't eat any sugar, or foods processed with sugar. Cook a meal every day. Soup, stew, garden salad, chicken, steak, pork. If it's all fresh, you control the ingredients. NO SUGAR. If you make a stew or soup that has to simmer for awhile, make four to six servings and keep it in the fridge for the week or freeze some for the next few weeks. I think you'll find that eliminating the sugar will curb your cravings to eat and you'll find yourself going a longer time between meals. I hope you know how to cook!
John
No no no no no. Ignore anyone who tells you anything "is the enemy". You know when I stopped binging every day? When I stopped restricting entire food groups. When I got off Weight Watchers and I stopped trying to do Keto and Paleo and Whole30. With the exception of food allergies or sensitivities, this is completely unnecessary and dangerous to someone dealing with binge eating.
It's not as easy as that, but it's a really good start. When I came back here this time (I'm almost at 2 months binge free), I followed the advice people gave me. I started just logging my calories at maintenance, then I went down to .5 lbs a week, then 1 lb a week. I am now at 2 lbs loss a week, but only after a few weeks and when I felt comfortable lowering my calories.
I think for me, this was the biggest help. SLOWLY decreasing my calories, eating my exercise calories, and still eating all my favorite foods, but less of them gradually over time.
I'm not perfect and there are definitely still bad days, but it's a start.17 -
sounds like you have a challenging weekend ahead. work out each day to burn as many extra calories as you can. Eat super lean and light all day and save your calories for the events. Bring a good tasting dish to each party..you could even bring halo top ice cream or a low calorie pice of cake to eat at your mom's party. try to plan ahead.
I've been planning my super bowl low cal. enchilada casserole all week so I don't get tripped up at the super bowl party tomorrow. You can do this.
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I have been diligent with meeting my calorie goals, but this weekend was a trip out of town and no way was I going to deny myself the local best eats! No tracking, really. I had the pizza, cheese fries, milkshakes and burgers, but I didn't over do it on portions. Plus, we did a lot of walking. After 4 days I came back weighing 1/2 pound more. I got right back to my calorie goal, and drank a lot of water/hot tea. The very next day, I weighed 1 1/2 pounds less.
The point is, a couple days of indulgence is not going to ruin it completely. Try to stick to your goals, but if you need to indulge try to aim for maintenance calories. That way you're not "undoing" anything.0 -
Sparkle097 wrote: »Thank u everyone for ur advices💗 I just need to eat these things in moderate. Hopefully I’ll lose 20 pounds end of April.
You want to lose 20 pounds by the end of April? That's only 5 weeks! That will set you up for this:
2
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