What motivates you to get to the gym after a tough exhausting day at work?

coffenback
coffenback Posts: 4 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
Hey guys.... Last March 16th I lost my wife to a rare brain cancer and instantly refocused on my own health once she passed away because when being the caretaker I let myself gain 40lbs because she needed me most.... My heaviest was 367lbs back in 2011 and had the vertical sleeve surgery got down to my lowest weight of 229... the 40lb gain put me up to 270 ish and now im down and stuck at 235-240 and back into old bad habits again after doing so well last year dropping the weight and going to the gym atleast 3 times a week.....

food is always a struggle and always dieting but sometimes I have my gym bag ready to go in the car and after work I simply make some stupid excuse why I dont feel like going to the gym.... it pisses me off because I know how amazing I feel afterwards and still play it off all the time.... I really wish I could rebuild my workout habits again and quit the BS excuses.... any advice or help would be amazing guys

thanks a ton


Chris
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Replies

  • QueenK71
    QueenK71 Posts: 1 Member
    I'm so sorry to hear about your wife. Have you tried getting up earlier and working out in the morning instead? After working all day i have absolutely no motivation to go workout so i get up at 5 and get 'er done! :)
  • hypocacculus
    hypocacculus Posts: 68 Member
    Could you not find a gym buddy? Nothing like a bit of camraderie to keep you going.

  • Soccermavrick
    Soccermavrick Posts: 405 Member
    Sorry for your loss.

    To answer your question. I keep a gym bag in the car and look for gyms that either have late hours or 24 hour. Honestly, the gym relaxes me. I also can sleep very well after a good workout, (not everyone can, but I do.) The gym really helps me to clear my mind and put long days, sitting behind a desk behind me.

    Another suggestion is figure out what your normal time is and try to find guys that you workout with. Sometimes it is just spotting you, or talking sports in the locker room while you are changing, but if it helps to get you there then it is a win.

    Beyond that own it. It is your choices that have you where you are, if you really want to change that, then you need to change what you are currently doing. (The past is the past. But it you want to get somewhere, you need to start taking steps in the direction you want to go. If it were easy, the diet and fitness industry would not be a Billion dollar industry, there would just be gyms.) Look in the mirror, set goals, write them down, put them somewhere where you will see them everyday. Then set smaller, reachable goals of how to get there. One day at a time, and you can get there.
  • rosiorama
    rosiorama Posts: 300 Member
    I focus on how I feel AFTER I work out. You know the feeling! I know I will be glad afterward. Thinking about the gym itself doesn’t get me there as easily.

    I also do my leg days in the morning before work: at 630 am, there are few people there and I don’t have to line up for the squat rack! It really sucks to get up that early, but then it’s done. I get my lunch made the day before, and everything ready for the morning so it takesminimal time to get out the door. It took me months of thinking about it to actually DO it. Bonus: I don’t have to do it at the end of the day and going at the busier time.

    So sorry to hear about your wife.
  • jasonpoihegatama
    jasonpoihegatama Posts: 496 Member
    The gym was a part of my day i had a eating plan that goes right through out the day that keep my energy up and going for the gym and the day i did go my eating plan was different
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,741 Member
    I'm sorry for your loss. Not that you have to answer publicly, but I think the questions @savithny asked are important to consider.

    Also, you said, "I have my gym bag ready to go in the car and after work I simply make some stupid excuse why I dont feel like going to the gym". Don't have the conversation with yourself. Just go to the gym and don't think about it. But, that's only if you truly enjoy it. If not, there are lots of other ways to get physical activity that you may otherwise enjoy.
  • chornak05
    chornak05 Posts: 135 Member
    Sorry for your loss :(

    For me personally, I never have the motivation to go to the gym after work. Since I know this, I started going in the morning. Took a little while to get used to the early wake ups, but totally worth it to have a good work out in before the day really gets busy/exhausting.
  • Phirrgus
    Phirrgus Posts: 1,894 Member
    I can only join the others, sorry for your loss. I just couldn't imagine..

    What savithny is asking below is so important. Please don't disregard it. That, and I would personally recommend a change of routine. When ever my current routine leaves me stuck, I need to do something different, even if it means taking a week long break to get my perspective back.

    Wishing you all the best.
    savithny wrote: »
    I'm so sorry for your loss.

    Caretaking through that kind of condition is so brutal on the people it leaves behind.

    I'm going to ask a different question about your health, but I promise its related: Did you have counseling and support during your wife's illness? Do you have any counseling or support now?
    Living through a death can have enormous affects on physical, mental, and emotional health -- and maybe you need some help in looking at the excuses you're making and why you're avoiding the gym?

    Was it something you used to do with your wife? Was it something that bothered her? Are there places and times that remind you of bad stuff? Would a change of scenery or activity help? DO you hate running into people you know who haven't heard the bad news, even though its nearly a year ago?

  • midlomel1971
    midlomel1971 Posts: 1,283 Member
    First off, I'm so sorry for the loss of your wife. I'm glad you are taking care of yourself and I hope you're finding peace.

    I try to approach going to the gym as total "Me Time" and I actually look forward to it. Nobody needs anything from me, no kids, no work, no doing anything for anyone else but me. I plug into a podcast (I freaking love Podcasts) or watch my Netflix shows. It's my time to decompress and watch what I want to watch. I'm a total introvert living the life of an extrovert, so that alone/me time is really critical for me.

    But I agree w/ some of the other posters. Maybe you need a change of routine. I don't know how much social interaction you get, but maybe you could join a class? I sometimes go to a morning Boot Camp type of class and there are a lot of men and they are always joking around and they seem to have a blast doing it. (Me, not so much...the class is punishing.)
  • Sunshine_And_Sand
    Sunshine_And_Sand Posts: 1,320 Member
    Sorry for your loss.

    On days that I workout after work, if I'm tired or had a bad day at work, I just tell myself that these are the times I need to workout most because I know working out will help me feel better and I won't have to bring that stress home with me.
  • striving4moretoday
    striving4moretoday Posts: 60 Member
    So sorry for your loss.

    I have no idea how to regenerate myself after a long hard day at work...so I go to the gym in the morning 6am <3
  • alohajls
    alohajls Posts: 55 Member
    amy19355 wrote: »
    i take my work frustrations to the stairmaster, and imagine every annoying document, email, or colleague underneath my feet as I climb.

    takes about 10 minutes to push all that crap to the back of my mind til the next day at the office.

    I like you. And I look forward to adopting this approach on a less knee-punishing form of cardio!
  • FireOpalCO
    FireOpalCO Posts: 641 Member
    There is a carrot and a stick. The carrot aspect is the classes are things I enjoy and I have gotten to know people at those classes who will greet me by name and smile. So I'm not walking in cold. They have set start times so my phone beeps at me for "time to go".

    The stick side is the no-show fees I get charged if I late cancel.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    Is there something else you could or would like to do besides the gym? I'm not much of a gym rat, I'd much rather be outside on my bike. I only go to the gym a couple times per week to lift and it's a pain after work, but it's only a couple of evenings. Other evenings I get home and get on my bike and enjoy a nice ride to wash the day away.
  • idabest777
    idabest777 Posts: 97 Member
    I alternate between going to the gym late at night or right after work. I'm usually more motivated late at night because I go to watch my favourite shows as they air on tv and I've had time to relax for a bit after work.

    I find that when I'm going after work I'm more motivated if I've had a large lunch because I'm less tired. (I normally have a lighter lunch and a bigger supper but I've switched that now for days that I go to the gym after work.) On days where I'm especially not motivated after work or I'm feeling extra exhausted I make a deal with myself to just go and do a really easy workout while I'm there. Like walking on the treadmill for 30 minutes. It's better than doing nothing and requires little effort. Added bonus is that I usually find once I'm there I'm more willing to get a better work out in, but I don't put any pressure on myself to step it up. I've gone before and just walked and read an ebook for 30 minutes, but that was still better than going home and crashing on the couch and eating snack all evening.
  • JBanx256
    JBanx256 Posts: 1,479 Member
    So sorry for your loss man. I can't imagine how tough of a time that was for you.

    Personally I go before work because I know after a 12+ hour shift there's just no way on earth I'll have the energy to get after it the way I need to in the gym. Plus I've got a youngin' at home so once I get home I want that to be time with her - dinner, homework, reading, etc, not gym time.
  • psychod787
    psychod787 Posts: 4,099 Member
    Sorry bout the wife man... no motivation... it has become habit. If I do not go I feel strange...
  • ritzvin
    ritzvin Posts: 2,860 Member
    Depending on when you are changing your mind and skipping the gym (if it's on the way driving): Take the workout bag in with you and change in your office/bathroom while still at work before heading out to your car. and maybe some caffeine later in the afternoon.
  • deputy_randolph
    deputy_randolph Posts: 940 Member
    I do my "harder" workouts (deadlifts) before work (around 6am). I do my "easy" workout Mondays after work. I save my other 2 "hard" workouts (squats and bench) for the weekend.

    I have zero energy for deadlifts after work, but shoulders are fun.
  • Fflpnari
    Fflpnari Posts: 975 Member
    I make myself go to the gym. Its my therapy. The worse my day at work is the more I need the therapy session.
  • New_Heavens_Earth
    New_Heavens_Earth Posts: 610 Member
    I'm sorry for your loss.

    What gets me to the gym after work is that it's a stress reliever. I get in, get out go home. Most of the time it's zoning out on the treadmill.
  • ElC_76
    ElC_76 Posts: 3,054 Member
    edited February 2019
    Sorry for your sadness.

    <3

    I've found having genuine devoted mfp connections has helped me to keep up. This has REALLY helped me through my hurts.

    Wish u all the very very best!!

    Ohh, I forgot to add I find getting my workout done b4 the days starts better. That way u can go straight to bed at the end of the day if things get too much. Sleep is also great for weight loss and a great healer.
  • alicehobbisxx
    alicehobbisxx Posts: 16 Member
    I'm really sorry for your loss, I can't even imagine how heartbreaking that must be. Of course your health is important, but please make sure to take care of your mind first - mental health is just as important. In saying that, I suffer with anxiety and depression and it can be very difficult to get into the cycle of keeping up exercise/healthy eating. I'm an emotional eater and depression makes me want to curl up in a ball, not exercise. What I would say is to find what you actually like to do so it is less of a chore. Personally, I hate the gym at this point in time as I feel too unfit to be able to enjoy anything without getting fatigued. I've started taking up swimming instead as I've always been naturally good at it and I really enjoy it. Another thing is to find what time is right for you, personally I can't think of anything worse than exercising after work as all I want to do is get home. I would try going in the mornings, it SUCKS at first but once you're up and there, you'll feel relieved knowing it's out of the way and you can enjoy your evenings.
  • quiksylver296
    quiksylver296 Posts: 28,439 Member
    I am so sorry for your loss.

    I prefer to go to the gym in the morning before work.

    But when I have to go after work, I change into my gym clothes at work. That seems to shift my mind into gym-mode, no matter how tired I am.
  • kali31337
    kali31337 Posts: 1,048 Member
    quiksylver296 wrote: »
    I am so sorry for your loss.

    I prefer to go to the gym in the morning before work.

    But when I have to go after work, I change into my gym clothes at work. That seems to shift my mind into gym-mode, no matter how tired I am.

    Like Quiksylver296 said, I also prefer to go before work but lately with my new schedule, I just can't get there so I'm always going after work. It's been helpful that I always have my meals prepped out so I can eat once I'm back from the gym and it's just one less thing I have to do. I also come straight home and change into my clothes and, this is important, I DON'T sit down on the couch. Even if I need a quick snack, I eat it standing in my kitchen and then head out.

    If it's an especially hard day, I tell myself that I only have to do one thing then I can come and 99% of the time I end up getting into the groove and doing my full workout but knowing that I have the out to be lazy if I need to usually gets me there.
  • Tammyrae99
    Tammyrae99 Posts: 29 Member
    So sorry about your loss. Do it for her.💓
  • quiksylver296
    quiksylver296 Posts: 28,439 Member
    kali31337 wrote: »
    quiksylver296 wrote: »
    I am so sorry for your loss.

    I prefer to go to the gym in the morning before work.

    But when I have to go after work, I change into my gym clothes at work. That seems to shift my mind into gym-mode, no matter how tired I am.

    Like Quiksylver296 said, I also prefer to go before work but lately with my new schedule, I just can't get there so I'm always going after work. It's been helpful that I always have my meals prepped out so I can eat once I'm back from the gym and it's just one less thing I have to do. I also come straight home and change into my clothes and, this is important, I DON'T sit down on the couch. Even if I need a quick snack, I eat it standing in my kitchen and then head out.

    If it's an especially hard day, I tell myself that I only have to do one thing then I can come and 99% of the time I end up getting into the groove and doing my full workout but knowing that I have the out to be lazy if I need to usually gets me there.

    Good point. If you have to go home, do NOT sit down.

    I also trick myself by saying "just do 10 minutes. If you want to leave after 10 minutes, you can." I never have.

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