Help with stubborn major weight loss, need to lose over 100 lbs

jczandme

I can't take it anymore, I can't stand to look at myself. I have to lose weight or I will lose my life. My kids a daughter 24 who is a RN, my middle 19 kinds lost right now ( refuses to listen or go to college), my only son 15 yo and he wants me to lose weight so bad so I can live and travel with him. I am to embarrassed to say I can't fit in a plane seat my stomach is to fat, I am too fat, I need God and motivated friends!! Any advice on whats works to kick off my new lifestyle?

MichelleSilverleaf

- choose a reasonable deficit that's manageable for you
- get a food scale if you don't already have one
- track accurately
- get adequate protein
- identify which macro helps keep you satisfied longer. For some it's protein, for others it's fat, for others it's carbs. Doing this will help with the appetite
- realize that foods are just foods, there are no 'good' or 'bad' foods unless of course you have a medical condition or serious allergies
- eat in a way that is both a variety and a way that you can sustain long-term. Don't do something like keto or vegan if that's not something you can do literally the rest of your life
- learn to make things like treats fit into your day. Some save a number of calories for an end-of-day treat, some people bank calories, some just accept that they'll end up eating at maintenance for the day
- one mistake doesn't ruin the whole effort, don't think you've failed or just throw in the towel because of an off day. Log it, learn from it, move on. We've all been there
- stay hydrated
- motivation is fleeting, build discipline instead. The more you use it the better it works

Luciicul

Book in to have a health check-up with your doctor; they should run some blood tests to see if you have any medical conditions or nutrient deficiencies that could be affecting your weight.

I'm looking to lose over 100lbs too. I found out I am insulin resistant; have been put on medication & recommended a low-carb/keto diet; and have a few more tests to do too. Also have a child who I have focused on rather than looking after myself - it's tough being a mum!

mscrystalsaahene

Great

estherdragonbat

jczandme wrote: »

I can't take it anymore, I can't stand to look at myself. I have to lose weight or I will lose my life. My kids a daughter 24 who is a RN, my middle 19 kinds lost right now ( refuses to listen or go to college), my only son 15 yo and he wants me to lose weight so bad so I can live and travel with him. I am to embarrassed to say I can't fit in a plane seat my stomach is to fat, I am too fat, I need God and motivated friends!! Any advice on whats works to kick off my new lifestyle?

I hear you. I was 254lbs at 5'3 and dealing with lymphedema caused by my excess bulk collapsing the veins in my legs, including the ones that move lymph fluid through the body. Then I got an infection, produced more lymph fluid, and since it couldn't all squeeze through, the leg erupted in water blisters. Plus a weeping wound that took multiple courses of antibiotics and daily dressing changes from home care nurses to treat.

Doctor was clear: when the wound heals, get compression stockings and lose weight. The condition can be controlled and managed, not cured.

I looked at what I was dealing with in the present and decided it couldn't be my future. I've got family members who've had weight-loss surgery. One look at the pre-surgery and immediate-through-short-term post-surgery diet told me it wasn't going to be a good fit for me. (I'm vegetarian. Beans and grains are dietary staples.)

I've been here on MFP since October 30 2016. That was 108lbs ago and I'm closing in on the 140 top of the healthy weight range.

What worked along the way?

1. Being honest and real with myself. I wasn't going to give up eating desserts or starchy carbs. In a social setting, I was going gravitate toward the food. I couldn't change the tendencies; I could come up with strategies to stop the tendencies from derailing my progress. So...
2. I decided to restrict homemade desserts to 200 calories or fewer per serving. That eliminates most of the super-rich and/or frosted options, but, for example, I made vanilla cookies this week at 90 calories each. Next week I'm making an angel cake pudding (like a bread pudding, but with angel food cake cubes soaked in a mixture of cinnamon sugar, egg whites, unsweetened almond milk, and vanilla, then baked).
3. Over time, I've started paying attention to protein, iron, and fiber, doing my best to hit those targets.
4. When I know I'm heading into a social situation, I try to anticipate what will be served and log what I mean to eat in advance. Sometimes it can be really freeing to take a cake pop from the sweet table and think, "Database has these ranging from 120 to 170 calories. This is completely doable." One thing I used to struggle with was getting into an emotional eating down-spiral. Sort of, "I really shouldn't eat X. I'm on a diet. But it's there, and it's calling me and... Argh! I ate it. There goes the diet. I'm a failure. I feel horrible. But eating always numbs me and since today's already shot... Argh! Shouldn't have eaten that either. I'd better leave. After I have something else for the road..." But when I go in knowing, "I budgeted for this, I have the calories, I can totally eat it," then all I have is the treat, hold the sides of guilt and self-loathing.
5. Upping my fitness level. I don't do much that's really strenuous. I take long walks and my speed has increased from around 2.8 to 3.5 mph, but that's just my normal pace, now; I don't get out of breath. I use a Gazelle Edge glider when I can't walk. And I strength train with dumbbells. After 2 years, I've juuuuuuuuuuuuuust worked my way up to where I can squat with a pair of 35s and yesterday I was able to pick up a pair of 40s off the rack at my local fitness shop, though it was a little harder putting them back down without slamming them. First, it takes time to do, so it cuts back on my boredom eating. Plus it relieves stress, so there goes a lot of emotional eating. And I find my TOM issues have been greatly reduced.

But it starts with small changes. Ask yourself what you're ready to start with. Maybe, like me, it'll be lower-calorie desserts or a 25-minute daily walk. Maybe it'll be upping your non-starchy veg consumption or joining a fitness class. Don't do too much too fast, but pick something you can stick with and go from there.

It's not going to happen overnight... but then, neither did your weight gain.

You've got this.