How to keep motivated, slow loser

Kate8628

Hi everyone. Want to share my story in hope that I may get some advice or support. I am 33 this month and have been trying to lose weight for 5 years. I lose very very slowly. Sometimes only 2lb in a month with calorie counting and exercise and I am not going to lie I always lose motivation as it is so slow and think what is the point. I have been around the same weight for over a year and can't seem to shift anything. I have started again promising I wouldn't get on the scales but always end up giving in and the number never seems to change. I average around 15,000 steps a day, I am always cleaning (I have 3 kids) and on the go all the time but nothing. It's so hard since having my third baby, he is 16 months now and I am so fed up with seeing 3 rolls of fat. I keep getting comments about my weight, people seem to think I have lost a lot but measurements and weight are exactly the same as before.
I have really bad varicose veins on both legs from carrying too much weight and I have a very small bone structure so do not carry it well.
Anyone else lose slowly? Any stories on how long it finally took to see a difference? Really in need of motivation.
Doesn't help the my friend 2 yesrs ago started to diet and she dropped 3 dress sizes in 4 months with no exercise or calorie counting, she just made sure she felt hungry all the time. She is now gone from a size 14 to an 8 and kept it off for a year while trying to put some weight back on.... I mean wth, I only have to look at cake and I gain 6lb.
Sorry for the long post but I am so fed up with this merry go round.

DeahB2015

Have you checked your hormones? Insulin, glucose, leptin?

DaffyGirl88

I feel your pain. It takes me For. Ev. Er. to lose a pound, while my husband can drop 10 in a month just by cutting out after dinner snacks. Some days I get discouraged after I think I have done everything right (eating right, exercising, etc.) and then get on the scale only to have it go up. It's like what's the point? Luckily that feeling only lasts a few hours or a day max, then I get back to it again. I don't have any answers for you, just here to say that you are not alone.

mundeliusl

Hey, I know what you mean by people commnting that you've lost weight when the scale says the same. The scale would tip back and forth around the same weight, or even higher but people would say that I look good or lost weight. My gym has this device that measured your body composition (muscle, fat, bone) in percentage, poundage, and area (discovered I'm mostly *kitten* xD). I measured myself once and then after four months and what I found was that my overall weight did not change, but my fat decreased and my muscle increased.

I'm gonna speculate that you have strong arms from raising three kids with one still relatively yoing. (not necessarily mean you look ripped, but the muscle is there). So when people notice you look like you lost weight, they probably do see the change that you can't. Your scale will tell you basically nothing about your body and for me it really brings me down.

Mental state also affects your weight loss. There are studies about how getting messages from doctors and society to lose weight/look good stress people out and contribute to keeping the pounds on (it doesn't necessarily mean that you'll stress eat). Like even if someone is making progress on their diet and exercise routine, if a doctor just randomly inserts "oh and make sure to lose weight" when you're there for an eye examination, it's proven to undo a lot of the work and motivation of that person to stick to their plan.

I started in ernest to lose weight in 2014 when I was 199lbs and lost water weight after a week but then nothing for weeks/months/years. I felt like *kitten* and other people seemed to be able to have a good exercise routine and weight loss. In 2016 what I found helpful was to look at my body in the mirror and focus on one thing I like about myself. For me it was my hair. It wasn't necessarily about weight, but it was my step to self love. I stopped obsessing with the scale so much and focused on loving and accentuating the features of my body I liked to improve my self-worth. I liked my boobs, hips and butt, but I have almost beer belly, flabby arms and thunder thighs. So what I did was dress to hide my fat. I started to love my body and have a better outlook on myself even though I was still 189lbs and unsightly naked body.

I started to drop some more weight the next three years and now fluctuate between 170-175lb. It has taken 5 years to lose those 24lbs and a lot of times I relapse and want to binge eat all the junk and say *kitten* it. But I gain weight a lot quicker than lose/keeping off. A lot of days I cry about my beer belly, and don't see any difference in my body. It doesn't help when the BMI chart and doctors tell me that 120lbs is my ideal weight and that's just so far from this here and now.

But then I actually take pictures of myself now and compare to pictures of before and I do see the difference. My face was more inflated back then and now it's slimmed and has angles. My arms were somehow bigger than today. So on top of dressing nicely, I try to take flattering photos of myself to motivate me and boost my confidence.

This journey is really hard emotionally, so take care of your inner self. It takes forever, but instead of thinking of the weight, think of what makes you happy. That's my experience with it ❤️

Jamiedw38

I am the same way, I started using this app to get some motivation and some friends with the same issues

cheryldumais

It took me 2 years to lose the weight. I lose very slowly and maintain on a very low level of calories (about 1300 pre exercise). I am however pretty sedentary. I walk for exercise and I have to force myself to do that. Having said that however I did get to my goal weight and have maintained for over a year. You can do it too. There is some advantage to losing slowly believe it or not. As you are changing your lifestyle you will get used to the new patterns and they become habits over time. I can't eat the volume of food I used to. It literally makes me sick. It took quite a while for my body to get to that point but now it's a help when I have a day where I decide to eat what I want. Having said that don't misunderstand... That is an annual event for my birthday not a monthly or weekly "cheat". Take your time and learn along the way. You are way more likely to keep the weight off that way anyway.

puffbrat

It is slow and can be incredibly frustrating! Are you weighing your food with a food scale? If not, start doing so.

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/818701/the-myth-of-motivation-and-what-you-need-instead/p1

quiksylver296

http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10634517/you-dont-use-a-food-scale/p1

Kate8628

DeahB2015 wrote: »

Have you checked your hormones? Insulin, glucose, leptin?

No that's not something I have done. Maybe I should just to eliminate it. Thanks

yayamom3

I lose incredibly slowly, too. Here are some key ideas that I remind myself about whenever I start to feel frustrated (many of them I've gleaned from reading all of the wonderful advice on these message boards):

1. I've yo-yo'd and regained so many times, that I'm adamant I'm never doing that again. I know that by losing slowly I'm completely redesigning my lifestyle into a healthy one that can be sustained for the remainder of my life.

2. I feel amazing when I'm taking care of my body and eating nutritious foods. I feel AWFUL, both physically and mentally, when I eat garbage. When I'm old, I don't want to be in a wheelchair, on oxygen, suffering from diabetes or high blood pressure. I remind myself that even if I never lose another pound, I will continue to eat and exercise this way for the rest of my life because it makes me feel like a completely different, wonderful person.

3. I often remind myself that time will continue to pass no matter how I'm choosing to live. A year from now, I can be a few pounds lighter or I can be heavier (which is what would continue to happen if I continued to follow my old habits). Which do I prefer to be one year from now?

4. One day at a time--it's so important. Sure, setting goals and planning for my future are important. But if I start to focus on all of the work I have to do and the uphill battle I have ahead of me, it is completely overwhelming and defeating. Instead, I need to focus on the present. My healthy choices happen one moment, one hour, one day, one bite at a time. Later, when I look back and reflect, I can really see how those simple daily choices can really add up.

lorrpb

"Why" do you want to be motivated? THAT is your motivation, not fleeting feelings of enthusiasm. The answer is different for each of us. You set a plan and stick to it regardless of how you "feel" that day. As for the cake, I don't keep it in my house so I don't have to look at it. If you feel you "have to" keep cake around for other family members, keep it in a designated cupboard that you don't see. Keep fruits and veggies in the spots you see the most because they are less calorie-laden.

Next time you want to quit, just remember that 2 x 12 = 24 lbs a year. Wouldn't that be a nice place to be a year from now?!

Read the Success Stories forum and all the sticky threads that share tips on how to do this.

Kate8628

Some good advice here. Thanks guys. 24lb in a year, I NEVER thought of it that way, that would be awesome, thank you @lorrpd

alisonpinnell

I find measuring my change in waist helps when the scale isn't budging. sometimes when I was gaining muscle my weight platued