How to attract women, fail safe tested method

karenjoy
karenjoy Posts: 1,840 Member
in Chit-Chat
Ok so yesterday we went to the monkey sanctuary, I inadvertently discovered that the way to get all the monkeys no matter how absorbed they are in what they are doing, how uninterested in life and people in general they may appear, there is a way to make them come to you and ignore all the other people, have a toy monkey with you...total result.

So men, if you want similar success with women, carry around an inflatable sex doll and you are sure to attract them in their hundreds

This has been tested on animals so must be true

I have video evidence

Any results beyond the initial crowding around you may depend on your own behaviour and I accept no responsibility for any injuries etc as a result of the volume of women, I also suggest you carry a stick for your own protection
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Replies

  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    Ok so yesterday we went to the monkey sanctuary, I inadvertently discovered that the way to get all the monkeys no matter how absorbed they are in what they are doing, how uninterested in life and people in general they may appear, there is a way to make them come to you and ignore all the other people, have a toy monkey with you...total result.

    So men, if you want similar success with women, carry around an inflatable sex doll and you are sure to attract them in their hundreds

    This has been tested on animals so must be true

    I have video evidence

    Any results beyond the initial crowding around you may depend on your own behaviour and I accept no responsibility for any injuries etc as a result of the volume of women, I also suggest you carry a stick for your own protection

    a scene from Inflatable Dolls Gone Wild!

    450px-Sex-dolls.jpg
  • sam308lbs
    sam308lbs Posts: 1,936 Member
    u mirin?

    diapo_sex_dolls9.jpg
  • JenAndSome
    JenAndSome Posts: 1,893 Member
    u mirin?

    diapo_sex_dolls9.jpg


    Shudder. Way too much creepiness going on there.
  • Fit_NYC_
    Fit_NYC_ Posts: 1,389 Member
    I knew I was missing something...
  • sam308lbs
    sam308lbs Posts: 1,936 Member
    u mirin?

    diapo_sex_dolls9.jpg


    Shudder. Way too much creepiness going on there.
    Op it didnt work!:angry:
  • karenjoy
    karenjoy Posts: 1,840 Member
    u mirin?

    diapo_sex_dolls9.jpg


    Shudder. Way too much creepiness going on there.
    Op it didnt work!:angry:

    try waving them about
  • Fit_NYC_
    Fit_NYC_ Posts: 1,389 Member
    They're not approaching, but I am getting women to look at me!
  • karenjoy
    karenjoy Posts: 1,840 Member
    They're not approaching, but I am getting women to look at me!

    persevere, it will work if you wave them about and make the right noises
  • Fit_NYC_
    Fit_NYC_ Posts: 1,389 Member
    wait.. there's noises?

    ok... I'll try again...
  • karenjoy
    karenjoy Posts: 1,840 Member
    wait.. there's noises?

    ok... I'll try again...

    yes, obviously

    I make really great ones, my neighbours are often banging on the wall
  • Prettymisssparkles
    Prettymisssparkles Posts: 1,274 Member
    andrew-mccarthy-mannequin.jpg
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    u mirin?

    diapo_sex_dolls9.jpg

    I was totally attracted to this guy from some unknown reason, but he broke my heart when he told me all he like was plastic and Asian.
  • EirePetal
    EirePetal Posts: 54 Member
    Men with blow-up dolls are soooooo SEXY! You know what would be even better is if the doll was dressed as a clown. I would just melt...
  • Fit_NYC_
    Fit_NYC_ Posts: 1,389 Member
    wait.. there's noises?

    ok... I'll try again...

    yes, obviously

    I make really great ones, my neighbours are often banging on the wall

    I'm obviously doing it wrong :(
    I need better noises...
  • saxmaniac
    saxmaniac Posts: 1,133 Member
    You know, I think I'm just going to stick with a big bag of ducks, instead. But thanks for the tip.
  • Juliejustsaying
    Juliejustsaying Posts: 2,332 Member
    wait, wut?

    tumblr_mraf16PxEv1rvkfp6o1_500.jpg
  • Vincentsz
    Vincentsz Posts: 407 Member
    HAHAHA!
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    recipe-image-legacy-id--1043451_11.jpg

    This works really well on me.
  • sam308lbs
    sam308lbs Posts: 1,936 Member
    u mirin?

    diapo_sex_dolls9.jpg

    I was totally attracted to this guy from some unknown reason, but he broke my heart when he told me all he like was plastic and Asian.
    Now hang on for a sec. Not all of them are asians, the left one is a latina. He just said that to you so he could reject you before you rejected him. Its a defence mechanism you see, the guy has all the feels.
  • Juliejustsaying
    Juliejustsaying Posts: 2,332 Member
    tumblr_mq8pdxKBQO1snhlk5o1_500.gif
  • Fit_NYC_
    Fit_NYC_ Posts: 1,389 Member
    So now I need noises and chocolate?
    Anything else???
  • karenjoy
    karenjoy Posts: 1,840 Member
    So now I need noises and chocolate?
    Anything else???

    Nuts

    oh and a really, really big stick

    I think its stick, hang on while I check
  • Fit_NYC_
    Fit_NYC_ Posts: 1,389 Member
    So we're back at the proverbial nuts and stick... lol
  • _Waffle_
    _Waffle_ Posts: 13,049 Member
    You could use one as a nut cracker.

    CFqqwOq.gif
  • ebgbjo
    ebgbjo Posts: 821 Member
    andrew-mccarthy-mannequin.jpg

    Now that is a great movie.
  • da_bears10089
    da_bears10089 Posts: 1,791 Member
    You could use one as a nut cracker.

    CFqqwOq.gif

    look at the fun bags on that... nut cracker
  • Fit_NYC_
    Fit_NYC_ Posts: 1,389 Member
    ^ exactly ^
  • Dreaaa
    Dreaaa Posts: 319 Member
    You could use one as a nut cracker.

    CFqqwOq.gif

    look at the fun bags on that... nut cracker

    where can I buy one?
    is breast size customizable??
    I need to know!!
  • DashDeV
    DashDeV Posts: 545 Member
    I had a moment with a Gorilla at the zoo. There were tons pf people crowded around watching him through the glass and he singled me out and began staring at me. He walked all the way over to where I was standing and sat right in front of me and just kept staring. It was one of the weirdest things I've ever experienced.
  • Legs_McGee
    Legs_McGee Posts: 845 Member
    I had a moment with a Gorilla at the zoo. There were tons pf people crowded around watching him through the glass and he singled me out and began staring at me. He walked all the way over to where I was standing and sat right in front of me and just kept staring. It was one of the weirdest things I've ever experienced.

    Sounds hot. Although I prefer spider monkeys myself.

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