guilty or not guilty

zfitgal

Hi everyone...This weekend was a holiday for me. I gave myself permission to indulge and go off program for 1 day but I did it today two . I'm at goal and havent went off for 5 weeks. I know this stuff happens but I kinda feel guilty. I told myself one day off program but today I was stuck in with all these amazing leftovers and chocolate, I have a bit of a head cold and needed something to give me energy so I just indulged making this 2 days...I know tomorrow is a new day and I'm back on track I just feel gross and guilty. any advice....

lynn_glenmont

Don't feel gross. Eating "at goal" is what you're supposed to do. That's what a goal is.
Don't feel guilty. You didn't hurt anyone.

NovusDies

Give yourself permission for today too. One of the most important things about indulging is that when you do it you need to enjoy it. If you feel guilty you have eaten the calories for no mental benefit.

AnnPT77

How many extra calories do you think feeling guilty burns? Yup, zero.

Does it feel good? Betting not.

Does it help encourage you to get back on or stay on a routine that helps you achieve long term goals? This is a tougher one, since some people seem to find guilt bizarrely helpful in this way. I personally don't.

Further, in year 3 of maintenance, I know that one over-goal day here or there is just a drop in the ocean, as long as it stays rare.

The one thing I'm a little uncomfortable with in your post is the "I have a bit of a head cold and needed something to give me energy so I just indulged" which sounds a little excuse-y, like you're sort of feeling sorry for yourself (maybe I'm misreading you, I apologize).

If you decided to eat extra one day for the holiday, it was a decision, and presumably worth it to you, and that's fine. It's also fine if you decided, with intention, to add a second day, too. (Obviously, it has to stop somewhere, or your long-term goals slip over the horizon, but you're not there at 2 days of indulgence.)

On the other hand, if you didn't find day 2 worthwhile in light of your overall long-term goals, then spend no more than 5-10 minutes thinking about what went wrong, how you'll handle things differently next time in similar circumstances, rehearse that vividly in your head a few times like a mini-movie so it'll come back to you next time, then let it go. The point is experimenting, learning, and adjusting your plans toward success and happiness.

Just get back on track at the next opportunity. You'll be fine. Anything else is unnecessary drama. You ate food. You didn't commit a mortal sin.

Best wishes!

Spadesheart

I mean, you lost weight before, so making up cheat (adjacent) days should be a cinch for you. I wouldn't feel bad about it, you earned it, and you can easily make up for it if you want to.

sardelsa

I would work on trying not to feel guilty for living life. What did you do wrong? There are weeks I don't workout and I eat and drink what I want. While it's not something that helps me reach my specific fitness goals during that time, it is break that I need sometimes and actually helps me long term. Learning how to get back to your normal routine after a break or overindulgence is really important in this whole journey. Look at the big picture not just one or two days in isolation. You are not a robot.

NovusDies

Spadesheart wrote: »

I mean, you lost weight before, so making up cheat (adjacent) days should be a cinch for you. I wouldn't feel bad about it, you earned it, and you can easily make up for it if you want to.

Except you really should not try and make up for it because that, too, makes it seem like a crime. Perfection is not required for weight loss, in fact, often it gets in the way. I pretty much have my own permission to do whatever I feel the need or sometimes just want to do as long as I spend most of my time in a calorie deficit.

apullum

If you're maintaining, then you have to accept that you're going to be doing this for the rest of your life. Some days you're going to go over your calories or not work out. Some days you're going to go under calories or work out more. Some days you're going to be sick and your body will need more food. That's how life works. Your weight is going to fluctuate within a range, not be identical every day, and the point of weight maintenance is just having a plan to stay within your range. Your mindset as well as your eating and exercise plan have to be sustainable for the long term. You can't spend the rest of your life beating yourself up if you have a few off days.

Lillymoo01

DON'T feel guilty. It happens and there is no point beating yourself up over it.

DO stay off the scales for at least 3 days. The extra food in your digestive tract and fluid retention will just give a false higher reading than normal but this won't be a gain in body fat.

In the unlikely event that the scales are still a little higher and outside your maintenance range after a week or so then just eat at a slight deficit for a few weeks.

sijomial

Maintenance should be enjoyable and that includes enjoying your food.
Are you intending on being so restricted for the rest of your life?

Think you should use this experience to have a serious think about your maintenance strategy not just day to day but month to month, season to season and year to year.

EmbeeKay

Confidence is owning your choices! Own your choice, acknowledge you enjoyed it, and move on! I know you are disciplined. I can almost guarantee you this will have zero impact on your long-term.

missysippy930

No guilt. The guilt should come after it becomes a habit for weeks or months.

Life happens, special days, birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, other celebrations. Key to maintaining, once the weight is lost, is to not go back to overeating and gaining weight back. Something over 80% of us have difficulty with.

Allow yourself to be human, a couple days will not do damage.

robertw486

If you really felt guilty, then just ask yourself why. Two days is nothing other than noise in the overall picture, and if you've been otherwise doing what you want to do it will have little to any impact.

Make your choices and live with them. And for many of us, those choices will include days of excess, indulgence, not caring, and just plain old fun.


A couple/fews years back I was dropping some weight for a period and we decided to have a bunch of friends over. Though we are getting a little too old to howl at the moon thinking tequilla all night, generally when people are over it's not a short term thing or lacking food and drink.

I logged over 7000 calories that day. I think all my goal calories were logged in alcohol alone.
#notguilty #gottahavefun #semihungoverbikeride

And BTW, I still actually lost weight that week.

Pickle107

Sometimes, you just have to say *kitten* it. The food was good. You enjoyed yourself. Brilliant. It was a lovely break from calorie counting. You just have to accept it happened (was hopefully mentally good for you) and get back on the horse.

Since you're at maintenance, social events or just lots of available food us going to happen, You just need to come up with your own set of rules of engagement. Think about when you'll allow yourself just to kick back and go wild or if you'll set limits in someway. I'm not at maintenance yet but I've discovered that I can have a much smaller slice of cake than I used to and not regret not having a door stop sized piece (or so I keep telling myself). But I have to fully turn it down unless there's a truly celebratory reason to have it. I have to ignore the sometimes sizeable pile of biscuits and cakes that sit next to my computer at work. It's definitely getting easier as time goes on.