Can't last longer than a week without binging. Any advice?

TinyCupcake995

These past couple of months have been horrible in terms of reaching my fitness goals. I've been binging more often than usual and can't seem to make it even a week without doing so. I've reached the highest weight I've been since January 2018 (went from 112 @ 5'4 to 118lbs) and the amount of guilt I feel is overwhelming at times. The retail job I have triggers me to binge often and I'm contemplating quitting it for more than just that reason (binge triggers being one of the biggest). The store I work at is dead with barely any customers walking in which is a problem because being alone and bored is a big trigger for me. There's always a bunch of bars, snacks and free chocolates and if you combine that with stress or anxiety, I'm much more likely to start pigging out on a bunch of stuff I wouldn't eat on a normal day. Following my binges, I often feel so disgusted with myself, I end up bawling and hiding myself in the staff room. I also do more exercise than I normally would the next day to compensate for my binge or I do a short 40 hour fast. Whether I fast or not doesn't make a difference in how often I will binge. I've been counting calories for 6 years now and I don't know what to do at this point. I'm sick of recreating and deleting my mfp account and trying new diets (paleo, vegan, sugar free,..etc) to help curb my binge eating problem. I've also tried having a serving of what I crave everyday or eating more "balanced" and that hasn't worked for me either. I read the book "brain over binge" which is often recommened by many people and I can't seem to get into the mindset the author promotes. Any other advice? I'm willing to try anything at this point.

MikePTY

Have you sought counseling or treatment before for eating disorder or body image issues? Some of the things you are describing, such as punishing yourself with exercise or fasting, are textbook ED symptoms.

I don't think the problem is with what you are eating. You are already at the low end of what is a healthy weight for your height, even at the 118 pounds that you feel is so awful. The perception of your weight and your reaction to it is the much bigger issue. Rather than focusing on the binge (which may or may not be as big as you think they are), the response is going to be the much more important thing to address.

cmriverside

100% What Mike said.

It's in your mind, the whole deal. You're at a healthy weight. You're probably doing unsustainably low calories and then over eating. The binge/restrict cycle you alluded to in your post is likely causing a lot of your problems, you can't really cut calories by more than a couple hundred per day when you're at a low healthy weight. Your body isn't going to want you to kill yourself.

Classic ED stuff, but even if that's not what you're doing it's the mindset that's dangerous. Please find a counselor who is well-versed in eating disorders.

150poundsofme

6 lb gain. I just gained back 30 lb. trying to diet and binge, classic yo-yo. Maybe if you are so unhappy at your job, you can update your resume if you have one or create a new one. See what other stores you would like to work at and if there are any openings. Hugs

helene4

I hear ya!

I started seeing a therapist for my binge eating, and I stopped binging after about a month of seeing her once a week
I highly recommend, my therapist is awesome!

neugebauer52

I think I know a bit about binge eating - after all, that's how I managed to pile up 170 kg (375 pounds). There are certain trigger foods which do not help me at all and P T S D always started a glorious binge eating session - with devastating results. For me mental health comes first and so far so good, I am getting there. Since I joined MFP 400 days ago I have learned a lot and member's advise is so important as well. Over time I have adjusted my daily macros to my own needs with the result that I have stopped binge eating and cheat meals all together. My experience with cheat meals ("but it's only once a week!") is not a good one - a meal turns into a day, turns into 3 days, turns into a week - you get the general idea. Balanced meals according to my needs might sound ever so boring but there is nothing I could not eat - as long as it fits within the MFP calculated daily calories and as long as I manage portion control - yes, I am still working on that one! So far 33 kg (70 pounds) down and a long way to go.

snowflake954

I agree with the others that therapy is what will help you. You are not overweight, it's not your job, or the snacks there that are causing binging. Please look into it. You need to get your head together before you do serious damage. Good luck.