Why do I keep doing this?!

mrsmojo82

This could be a novel, so I'll keep it as short and sweet as possible. Simply put: I am a yo-yo dieter. It's horrible. I lose tons of weight, (100+ at times) only to put it back on. My most recent battle, I lost 97. I've gained at least 50 back. I'm not certain because I don't want to get on the scale. I think why I'm struggling so much is because in order for me to lose weight, I have to account for every morsel that goes into my mouth. After a while, I get tired of weighing and measuring my food, so I stop. When I do, the weight creeps on.
I am very depressed. When I was thinner, people at work mentioned how thin/good I look; how I inspired them. I pass those same people now and I feel like a colossal failure. Not only to them, but to myself as well.

MissStacy322

First of all, kudos for not giving up! I've definitely experienced ups and downs through the years. Fat years and skinny years. For me, diets were never sustainable because I hated counting calories.

Perhaps you could focus less on calorie intake and more on physical activity. This is the first time in my life I've stopped being active and the weight just piled on. I took for granted the little activities that didn't necessarily shed pounds, but prevented weight gain. Maybe keep the scale hidden for a bit and add some additional activities to your routine and see how you feel. All the best!

thrld

Something to think about -- if you can only lose weight by strict dieting, then try to determine what maintenance would look like -- then make the changes that makes maintenance easier for you - like having 'cheat' days, or daily walks or going to dance class or taking up bicycling, or using a point system like Weight Watchers- whatever would work for you (think about adding heavy lifting as a workout -- more muscle means you burn more at rest, so when you go on maintenance, it might be easier to keep off the weight).

Losing weight/maintaining -- it's a trade off. You have to eat at deficit to lose. This may mean strict portion/calorie control, or it may mean adding more calorie-burning activity, or it may be a combination of both. It seems like the most successful on MFP do a combination of both. And once you've lost the weight, you should keep up with the activity - maybe dial it down from working out 4-5 days a week to 3-4 days a week. Just like you would up your calories 400-500 more so that you are no longer at deficit.

It's a lifestyle change. Some people can do short term and then go back to their 'regular' life. Other people make the lifestyle change, and it's pretty much forever. So try to make changes that are sustainable, not severe. Try to do things you like, not strict regimens that you grow tired of.

You need to do what is right for you, what is healthy for you. Don't worry about other people's thoughts/comments/expectation -- you need to do right by yourself, and only you can decide what that looks like. Good luck!

mrsmojo82

Thanks for the reply and encouragement. I will NOT give up! I just need to be careful because I fractured a disk in my back a couple of years ago in a car accident. So, if I over do it, I'm out of commission for a while. I need to change my "all or nothing" outlook.

srrose15

Do you think if you could focus on helping others in losing weight and getting healthy that you might be able to stay on track better and keep accountable? I have started some accountability groups to help others like me lose weight and get fit. Knowing these people are counting on me to be there for them as motivation - gives me the extra push I need each day to work out and eat healthy because I don't want to let them down. You said you have lost weight before and you know how to do it - why not use your knowledge to help others in the same boat? Most people would love to walk along someone that is in the same boat as they are not someone that is a size 2 - if you have questions on how you can get a group started or how I did it let me know - it has been the best decision ever and keeps me on track:)

PaulHalicki

Yeah, I can sympathize. I lost a bunch o' weight a few years ago, and it's pretty much all back.

Diet experts say that yo-yo dieting isn't good for you, but I have my own theory: For those people whose ancestors lived in difficult environments where food was scarce for extended periods, yo-yo dieting is how they survived. For instance, my ancestors are Polish. They have tough winters, histories of famines, etc. If my ancestors didn't have the ability to binge and put on a bunch of weight, they would not have made it through the lean times.

We now live in a time of perpetual plenty. But our genes program some of us to get all we can, while we can, in preparation for the times of lean. When we get to a certain low point, the genes drive us to increase our intake if possible. Well it's always possible these days, so back up we go.

I'm not sure what the answer is, except to not give up.

retiree2006

Sometimes it takes several bouts of yo-yo-ing to get fed up enough to realize that you are never "done" and can let up. You pointed out that when you get lax, you put weight back on easily. It can get tiring to account for everything...so maybe make up your own "meal plan" booklet with all the specifics for good, nutritious meals and just rotate those so you don't have to reinvent meals all the time. Give yourself lots of variety so you can just choose your meals for a day when you just don't want to figure it out again.