BED?

JellyyBeanz

I am literally incapable of eating normal portions. It’s never just a couple strawberries, it’s the whole box, even if I put them in a bowl I will always go back for more. I will eat until I am physically in pain every single day and I am quickly putting on weight. I’m a normal weight right now but it won’t be long before it gets out of control. I hate myself so much for this and I don’t know what to do, I really want to lose 10 pounds but I can’t even stick to maintenance let alone a deficit. Please give me any advice, I have started seeing a therapist but she brushed over my mention of this problem.

Clarisse_McClellan

Get a new therapist.

GemimaFitzTed

JellyyBeanz wrote: »

I am literally incapable of eating normal portions. It’s never just a couple strawberries, it’s the whole box, even if I put them in a bowl I will always go back for more. I will eat until I am physically in pain every single day and I am quickly putting on weight. I’m a normal weight right now but it won’t be long before it gets out of control. I hate myself so much for this and I don’t know what to do, I really want to lose 10 pounds but I can’t even stick to maintenance let alone a deficit. Please give me any advice, I have started seeing a therapist but she brushed over my mention of this problem.

Firstly - big big big hugs Don't hate yourself - you are worth more than you imagine

Dump your current therapist and find another who WILL listen to you. Brushing off over-eating shows she is not the best therapist for you. I'm not a therapist and I know what emotional eating looks like, because that is how I put on over 100lb.

Once you find a therapist who will listen to you, then you will understand why you eat until you're in physical pain. Mental health is as important as physical health when embarking on weightloss.

Good luck

Teabythesea_

I'm going to third the get a new therapist suggestion. If you personally feel like something is a problem it should NEVER be ignored by a therapist. Do not feel bad about going through a few therapists until you find one who will listen. This is ultimately going to be the person that you open up to, so you want it to be someone you trust has your best interest at heart. Its completely normal for a therapist to not be a good fit. I went through four before finding one I was comfortable talking to and would listen.

150poundsofme

Hugs

teranga79

You've made a really good start in finding a therapist (I totally agree with the recommendations to find a new one though!) Just making that initial connection and asking for help is something a lot of people really struggle with, so you should be really proud of yourself. I hope you manage to find a different therapist that is a better fit for you.

rheddmobile

It may not be the answer for you, but I have a friend whose binge eating problem was completely solved by medication. If your therapist isn’t familiar with this option and the pros and cons and whether or not it applies to you, find a therapist who is at least familiar enough with whether or not it would work for you to explain why or why not.

kshama2001

JellyyBeanz wrote: »

I am literally incapable of eating normal portions. It’s never just a couple strawberries, it’s the whole box, even if I put them in a bowl I will always go back for more. I will eat until I am physically in pain every single day and I am quickly putting on weight. I’m a normal weight right now but it won’t be long before it gets out of control. I hate myself so much for this and I don’t know what to do, I really want to lose 10 pounds but I can’t even stick to maintenance let alone a deficit. Please give me any advice, I have started seeing a therapist but she brushed over my mention of this problem.

If you told the therapist exactly what you told us and she brushed you off, get a new therapist.

However, if you didn't mention the bolded, you need to recognize she is not a mind reader, tell her, and take it from there.

grimendale

Like others have said, get a new therapist and make sure you're completely up front with them. It often takes a couple of tries to find someone you like who suits your needs. Don't feel like you're locked in because you already saw one, or because you're worried you'll hurt their feelings (something friends of mine have struggled with). You're hiring someone to help you, and you should shop around until you find someone who does.

peggy_polenta

i have to ask, did she brush you off, or did she tell you something you either don't want to hear or don't agree with? if you told her exactly what you posted, i find it really hard to believe that this would be brushed off. what were the things she said to you in response to you bringing this to her?

aokoye

peggy_polenta wrote: »

i have to ask, did she brush you off, or did she tell you something you either don't want to hear or don't agree with? if you told her exactly what you posted, i find it really hard to believe that this would be brushed off. what were the things she said to you in response to you bringing this to her?

That's a pretty good point. It's pretty easy to be in a position as a client where you really don't like what your therapist is saying. Not because they're saying something bad or being unprofessional, but because you don't want to believe it or it's uncomfortable. That said some therapists are actually pretty horrible (I've had a few of them).

OP I would really think about what peggy_polenta said and if that isn't the case, dump your therapist and get a new one.

Maxxitt

JellyyBeanz wrote: »

I am literally incapable of eating normal portions. It’s never just a couple strawberries, it’s the whole box, even if I put them in a bowl I will always go back for more. I will eat until I am physically in pain every single day and I am quickly putting on weight. I’m a normal weight right now but it won’t be long before it gets out of control. I hate myself so much for this and I don’t know what to do, I really want to lose 10 pounds but I can’t even stick to maintenance let alone a deficit. Please give me any advice, I have started seeing a therapist but she brushed over my mention of this problem.

My advice is to take an honest look at what was happening for you in your life/relationships when you found yourself incapable of eating normal portions. I am assuming there was such a time, because of your comment that you are currently at normal weight (despite "quickly putting on weight").

Exploring another idea, prior to this disordered eating pattern, were you at normal weight?

Often, a person's relationship with food reflects something important about their feelings about themselves.

This is where a therapist comes in handy.

Cahgetsfit

I agree with the get a new therapist suggestion. Also - have you looked into that binge eating anonymous group thing? Give it a Google. They have online sessions as well as face to face.

JellyyBeanz

peggy_polenta wrote: »

i have to ask, did she brush you off, or did she tell you something you either don't want to hear or don't agree with? if you told her exactly what you posted, i find it really hard to believe that this would be brushed off. what were the things she said to you in response to you bringing this to her?

Well there were a variety of issues I brought up, that being one of them, but in that particular session she focussed on my issues regarding stress (possibly related) instead of directly addressing the eating problem. Perhaps she is working towards it so I am seeing her again this week.

try2again

How long has this been a problem?

shelsrevenge

Hugs, you are the BEST you out there, extend the same grace to you that you would to others and know that you are capable of making the changes that you want to make, even baby steps are still steps!

Toviathan

JellyyBeanz wrote: »

peggy_polenta wrote: »

i have to ask, did she brush you off, or did she tell you something you either don't want to hear or don't agree with? if you told her exactly what you posted, i find it really hard to believe that this would be brushed off. what were the things she said to you in response to you bringing this to her?

Well there were a variety of issues I brought up, that being one of them, but in that particular session she focussed on my issues regarding stress (possibly related) instead of directly addressing the eating problem. Perhaps she is working towards it so I am seeing her again this week.

I think you should maybe take a step back and listen to your therapist for a little bit. You said you brought up a variety of issues. There is a strong possibility that they all stem from a common source issue. And getting to the bottom of that won't just happen overnight. And your therapist probably knows this, and knows that trying to go after each and every little symptom of the greater problem is a waste of time as long as you aren't in immediate danger from them. Working on improving your overall mental health is where the long-term gains are (almost word for word from one of my past therapists).

That doesn't sound like a bad therapist to me (from the limited amount of information). It sounds like one who is trying to get you to a better place overall rather than in pieces. But, you could and should bring this up to her too and gauge her reaction. Ask your therapist questions about what her plan of care for you is. Ask her why she would focus on the stress first and not the eating. If she is a good therapist, she will answer any questions you have. If you don't talk to her, then you can't blame her for not helping. Therapy is a two way street. You need to participate, and right now that participation could be in the form of asking questions.