Impressions on the internet
rickiimarieee
Posts: 2,212 Member
I was one of those girls that were always impressionable by women on the internet (Instagram, Facebook, etc) and I’ve always compared myself to them, and their bodies. I deleted all my social media because I hate that people always compare each other, it’s unhealthy. I wanted to post some pictures to show you what’s posted on the internet is photoshop and it’s not worth comparing yourself too. Be happy with yourself and stop comparing yourself.
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Replies
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rickiimarieee wrote: »I was one of those girls that were always impressionable by women on the internet (Instagram, Facebook, etc) and I’ve always compared myself to them, and their bodies. I deleted all my social media because I hate that people always compare each other, it’s unhealthy. I wanted to post some pictures to show you what’s posted on the internet is photoshop and it’s not worth comparing yourself too. Be happy with yourself and stop comparing yourself.
I'd take it a step further. Even comparison to women (or men) who are not photoshopped is damaging in some cases. It's one thing to set goals based on someone you admire, quite another to beat yourself down mentally over how someone else looks, real or perceived.
My wife and I went through our youngest daughters own brand of hell over this with her. She's out the other side now thankfully, but after seeing that I can sure endorse this message. Be your own brand of beautiful. More people will recognize it than you know.14 -
I wasn’t allowed to have social media growing up so till this day I don’t even have Instagram and don’t watch celebs that hardcore. I was never influenced like that. I feel sad for young girls who do.
Kourtney and Kim kardashian were always pretty and attractive though even before fillers and surgery.
That Tana girl I’m afraid was influenced and brainwashed by social media at one point too and now is doing the same damage for the next generation.2 -
rickiimarieee wrote: »I was one of those girls that were always impressionable by women on the internet (Instagram, Facebook, etc) and I’ve always compared myself to them, and their bodies. I deleted all my social media because I hate that people always compare each other, it’s unhealthy. I wanted to post some pictures to show you what’s posted on the internet is photoshop and it’s not worth comparing yourself too. Be happy with yourself and stop comparing yourself.
I'd take it a step further. Even comparison to women (or men) who are not photoshopped is damaging in some cases. It's one thing to set goals based on someone you admire, quite another to beat yourself down mentally over how someone else looks, real or perceived.
My wife and I went through our youngest daughters own brand of hell over this with her. She's out the other side now thankfully, but after seeing that I can sure endorse this message. Be your own brand of beautiful. More people will recognize it than you know.I wasn’t allowed to have social media growing up so till this day I don’t even have Instagram and don’t watch celebs that hardcore. I was never influenced like that. I feel sad for young girls who do.
Kourtney and Kim kardashian were always pretty and attractive though even before fillers and surgery.
That Tana girl I’m afraid was influenced and brainwashed by social media at one point too and now is doing the same damage for the next generation.
It honestly is so damaging! As a younger female I was definitely influenced by these kinds of pictures growing up. I put myself through hell trying to be like them. Starving myself, running everyday pushing myself daily. I’ve deleted all social media because it’s damaging and this stuff isn’t real! It’s all photoshopped!2 -
These are good photo comparisons (Although I don't understand the Kardashian one tbh)
I think I'm lucky or fortunate to not struggle with these issues. I am very well aware that I have an imperfect body and that I look nothing like the instagram models out there. But that's ok, I'm me and I'm comfortable with myself the way I am. I think all women should be. I find it to be so sad how self-conscious women are about very NORMAL things that happen with their bodies (like cellulite, wrinkles, thigh gap, stomach pooch etc.) I wish we could all just be comfortable in our own skin. I guess I feel like the more we hide our "imperfections" (notice the quotes) from the world, the more we are perpetuating the idea that women are all supposed to look a certain way.5 -
The Kardashian’s are queens of photoshop and plastic surgery!5
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These days I'm jealous of plus size models. Because I can recognize them as beautiful but I can never do the same for myself.
I guess its just easier to accept other people.15 -
Check out https://www.reddit.com/r/Instagramreality/ for a bunch more. Chasing that image is toxic and pointless.3
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rickiimarieee wrote: »The Kardashian’s are queens of photoshop and plastic surgery!
Kylie Jenner had to change her whole being to be successful, she’s a culture vulture. Had to go from plain Jane and morph into a fraudulent exotic beauty.
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rickiimarieee wrote: »The Kardashian’s are queens of photoshop and plastic surgery!
Kylie Jenner had to change her whole being to be successful, she’s a culture vulture. Had to go from plain Jane and morph into a fraudulent exotic beauty.
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rickiimarieee wrote: »
rickiimarieee wrote: »The Kardashian’s are queens of photoshop and plastic surgery!
Kylie Jenner had to change her whole being to be successful, she’s a culture vulture. Had to go from plain Jane and morph into a fraudulent exotic beauty.
I cannot with her!1 -
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rickiimarieee wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »The Kardashian’s are queens of photoshop and plastic surgery!
Kylie Jenner had to change her whole being to be successful, she’s a culture vulture. Had to go from plain Jane and morph into a fraudulent exotic beauty.
I cannot with her!
Me neither I always hear and read how she’s beautiful and natural beauty and *kitten* I’m like do you realize just how much you edits herself or how many times she went under the knife3 -
rickiimarieee wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »I was one of those girls that were always impressionable by women on the internet (Instagram, Facebook, etc) and I’ve always compared myself to them, and their bodies. I deleted all my social media because I hate that people always compare each other, it’s unhealthy. I wanted to post some pictures to show you what’s posted on the internet is photoshop and it’s not worth comparing yourself too. Be happy with yourself and stop comparing yourself.
I'd take it a step further. Even comparison to women (or men) who are not photoshopped is damaging in some cases. It's one thing to set goals based on someone you admire, quite another to beat yourself down mentally over how someone else looks, real or perceived.
My wife and I went through our youngest daughters own brand of hell over this with her. She's out the other side now thankfully, but after seeing that I can sure endorse this message. Be your own brand of beautiful. More people will recognize it than you know.I wasn’t allowed to have social media growing up so till this day I don’t even have Instagram and don’t watch celebs that hardcore. I was never influenced like that. I feel sad for young girls who do.
Kourtney and Kim kardashian were always pretty and attractive though even before fillers and surgery.
That Tana girl I’m afraid was influenced and brainwashed by social media at one point too and now is doing the same damage for the next generation.
It honestly is so damaging! As a younger female I was definitely influenced by these kinds of pictures growing up. I put myself through hell trying to be like them. Starving myself, running everyday pushing myself daily. I’ve deleted all social media because it’s damaging and this stuff isn’t real! It’s all photoshopped!
My daughter started out being teased relentlessley ....called shaming now I guess, and from that grew her obsession. The really sad part? And this isn't just Dad being biased, she's a natural beauty and just couldn't see it. I can't condemn the fraud that leads women and men to go down that road strongly enough.2 -
These days I'm jealous of plus size models. Because I can recognize them as beautiful but I can never do the same for myself.
I guess its just easier to accept other people.
You're looking in the wrong mirror.
There's a whole, 100% complete person in there that the image doesn't show. 4 -
Three cheers to the new heavyweight boxing champion, Andy Ruiz Jr., and the impact he’ll have on making everyone think about questionable body appearance.
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rickiimarieee wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »The Kardashian’s are queens of photoshop and plastic surgery!
Kylie Jenner had to change her whole being to be successful, she’s a culture vulture. Had to go from plain Jane and morph into a fraudulent exotic beauty.
I cannot with her!
Me neither I always hear and read how she’s beautiful and natural beauty and *kitten* I’m like do you realize just how much you edits herself or how many times she went under the knife
I have a younger cousin who’s influenced by Kylie’s look. She said people say she looks like Kylie Jenner meanwhile Kylie Jenner doesn’t even look like Kylie Jenner and in actuality Kylie looks like my cousin. Natural tanned skin, real curves no butt shots, real long thick long hair, natural full lips. Hello Kylie looks up to girls like her for beauty standards so why are these same people putting her on a pedestal.
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pierinifitness wrote: »Three cheers to the new heavyweight boxing champion, Andy Ruiz Jr., and the impact he’ll have on making everyone think about questionable body appearance.
I'm not sure that makes any impact, tbh, because the internal anxiety about appearance for most people who experience it has little to do with fitness or achievement. See the kind of body shaming Katelyn Ohashi was on the receiving end of even though she's peak performing in her sport. Additionally, looking like these people and not performing the way they do literally disconnects the two.4 -
rickiimarieee wrote: »rickiimarieee wrote: »The Kardashian’s are queens of photoshop and plastic surgery!
Kylie Jenner had to change her whole being to be successful, she’s a culture vulture. Had to go from plain Jane and morph into a fraudulent exotic beauty.
I don't think the after pics after an improvement, they just don't look realistic.3 -
MelanieCN77 wrote: »pierinifitness wrote: »Three cheers to the new heavyweight boxing champion, Andy Ruiz Jr., and the impact he’ll have on making everyone think about questionable body appearance.
I'm not sure that makes any impact, tbh, because the internal anxiety about appearance for most people who experience it has little to do with fitness or achievement. See the kind of body shaming Katelyn Ohashi was on the receiving end of even though she's peak performing in her sport. Additionally, looking like these people and not performing the way they do literally disconnects the two.
Truth. If people aren't viewing appearance in the boxing/mma world differently after Eric Esch, they won't with Ruiz either. Entirely different discussion.3 -
@MelanieCN77 - I beg to differ with your comment and add that men are men and women are women. I think he'll have an impact in the man's world, a surreal place where many men think they look better than they do, just toss on a bigger jersey of your favorite NFL team and you're good to go for another 10 yards. Women, different story.
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You're not wrong, but all the examples up thread were women (I'm dismissing the Jenner family photo as out of place, to be fair). Your example may well apply to a man, but the context of your reply suggested your judgment to be all-encompassing.
Then we can also get into for whom are we even trying to look a certain way, anyway? Maybe that fighter guy kicks *kitten* left, right and center in his sport. How do I interrogate his body? On a performance level, the facts can speak for themselves. On an evolutionary level of does it make me want babies with him? No, not at all. And so.
Additionally I don't think we can assume that this fighter doesn't have body perception issues while still appreciating his physical success.6 -
rickiimarieee wrote: »The Kardashian’s are queens of photoshop and plastic surgery!
While I appreciate the sentiment of this thread, I don't think shaming anybody's looks, including people for allegedly getting plastic surgery, is particularly helpful or body positive.35 -
pierinifitness wrote: »Three cheers to the new heavyweight boxing champion, Andy Ruiz Jr., and the impact he’ll have on making everyone think about questionable body appearance.
I can't imagine that he'll have much of an impact outside of perhaps a portion of people who follow boxing. There are a number of reasons 1. boxing isn't particularly popular 2. boxing has weight classes (which isn't so much an issue for people who don't follow boxing so much as I'd assume it play a role in his impact on people who do, especially children and adolescents), 3. he will likely have next to no impact on women and girls - note that I recognize that men and boys are far from immune from issues relating to body image, 4. he isn't known outside of boxing - or at least I'm assuming that's the case.
I suspect what impact he will have will be unrelated to weight and more related to race, ethnicity, and immigration history (and as much as I'd like to entertain that - it would go too off topic).6 -
rickiimarieee wrote: »The Kardashian’s are queens of photoshop and plastic surgery!
While I appreciate the sentiment of this thread, I don't think shaming anybody's looks, including people for allegedly getting plastic surgery, is particularly helpful or body positive.
This needs to be repeated.9 -
rickiimarieee wrote: »The Kardashian’s are queens of photoshop and plastic surgery!
While I appreciate the sentiment of this thread, I don't think shaming anybody's looks, including people for allegedly getting plastic surgery, is particularly helpful or body positive.
This needs to be repeated.
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ma mang im certain you watched h3h3 for that3
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In addition to your first sentence being exceedingly reductionist, you're missing the fact that a lot of men and boys (as well as girls and women) who have body image issues related to sports play/watch sports that aren't boxing. While Andy Ruiz Jr. is obviously an accomplished boxer, but I don't know why budding but serious rock climber, fencer, jockey, cyclist, soccer player, gymnast, etc would look to that person and say "oh hey so in this sport with weight classes this guy has succeeded so I can too!" when none of the sports I listed have weight classes and favor people with different physiques than heavy weight boxing. All of that assumes they even know who Ruiz is!pierinifitness wrote: »@MelanieCN77 - I beg to differ with your comment and add that men are men and women are women. I think he'll have an impact in the man's world, a surreal place where many men think they look better than they do, just toss on a bigger jersey of your favorite NFL team and you're good to go for another 10 yards. Women, different story.
What would make more sense would be, "I'm looking up to X person because they lost a bunch of matches and then came from the depths of defeat to win xyz title". That is far more universal.
I think that we need to be talking more openly about body issues that men and boys have and that we need to have more resources for things like eating disorders for men and boys. That said, I think that part of that means having nuanced conversations and not assuming that one person will reach all, or even most, people. And yes, you did say, "the impact he’ll have on making everyone think about questionable body appearance".9 -
I dunno. I feel like some of those examples are more camera angles and lighting and posing than photoshop. Maybe I'm just being naive to think that?
But I look at those first several examples more like "bad angle, good angle" examples. Kind of like all those "pretty girls making ugly faces" challenges a few years ago.
I'm not speaking about the larger issues with body image and cosmetic surgery and representing an unrealistic ideal...but just these kinds of "good pic, bad pic" with the same person on the same day. I know I can appear in photos on vacation where I look a good 30 lb lighter or heavier depending on the angle and pose. I have a friend who takes selfies from that above-her-head position MySpace scene kid style and she looks like a tiny cartoon girl with huge eyes thanks to filters to make her look younger, catlike, whatever. In real life, she looks nothing like that and is plus sized. I think more and more, people are expecting these unrealistic pictures and starting to realize they aren't reality...because they have become like the new normal.8 -
pierinifitness wrote: »Three cheers to the new heavyweight boxing champion, Andy Ruiz Jr., and the impact he’ll have on making everyone think about questionable body appearance.
I'm honestly not sure if this is trolling or not? While body issues are certainly a major issue for both men and women, and men can certainly feel societal pressure to look a certain way, I honestly don't feel like we get it nearly as bad as women do, who are bombarded non-stop by media judgments about how they are supposed to looks (which includes "not too skinny" in addition to "skinny enough"). Men don't regularly face the same things. He's not the first obese heavyweight champ by a long shot. Heck, there's a whole genre of television/movies which is basically boiled down to "obese man gets skinny girl". King of Queens, every Seth Rogen movie, etc.
Society allows men to be defined by more than strictly their weight by being "the funny one" or "the smart one" while it doesn't seem to afford the same opportunities to women. So I don't think we should be trying to "whataboutmen" into this conversation.
ETA:pierinifitness wrote: »@MelanieCN77 - I beg to differ with your comment and add that men are men and women are women. I think he'll have an impact in the man's world, a surreal place where many men think they look better than they do, just toss on a bigger jersey of your favorite NFL team and you're good to go for another 10 yards. Women, different story.
It's not some "surreal place called a mans world where they think they look better than they do" it's just that society allows men to still have bodily value when they have a less than perfect body type while it does not afford the same courtesy to women.30 -
While I don't disagree that cisgender men and boys typically have it "easier" in some ways than cisgender women and girls, I think that it's counterproductive to not talk about the fact that some men and boys face serious body image issues and suffer from eating disorders. I think not talking about it also serves as just one of many ways to perpetuate the idea that men and boys shouldn't express or have emotions that aren't in the neighborhood of "mad" or "happy" (note - I don't think you're consciously trying to do this). That being vulnerable is not ok, that it is not masculine (because apparently you have to have masculine traits to identify as male...), that it makes you weak, etc. I also don't think that talking about this takes away from discussing issues surrounding eating disorders and body image in women and girls, especially given the sheer lack of resources and discussion despite the very clear and present issues (never mind that things like men not being able to be vulnerable affects women).pierinifitness wrote: »Three cheers to the new heavyweight boxing champion, Andy Ruiz Jr., and the impact he’ll have on making everyone think about questionable body appearance.
I'm honestly not sure if this is trolling or not? While body issues are certainly a major issue for both men and women, and men can certainly feel societal pressure to look a certain way, I honestly don't feel like we get it nearly as bad as women do, who are bombarded non-stop by media judgments about how they are supposed to looks (which includes "not too skinny" in addition to "skinny enough"). Men don't regularly face the same things. He's not the first obese heavyweight champ by a long shot. Heck, there's a whole genre of television/movies which is basically boiled down to "obese man gets skinny girl". King of Queens, every Seth Rogen movie, etc.
Society allows men to be defined by more than strictly their weight by being "the funny one" or "the smart one" while it doesn't seem to afford the same opportunities to women. So I don't think we should be trying to "whataboutmen" into this conversation.
ETA:
It's not some "surreal place called a mans world where they think they look better than they do" it's just that society allows men to still have bodily value when they have a less than perfect body type while it does not afford the same courtesy to women.pierinifitness wrote: »@MelanieCN77 - I beg to differ with your comment and add that men are men and women are women. I think he'll have an impact in the man's world, a surreal place where many men think they look better than they do, just toss on a bigger jersey of your favorite NFL team and you're good to go for another 10 yards. Women, different story.
The article "Eating Disorders in Men: Underdiagnosed, Undertreated, and Misunderstood" by Strothers et. al (2012) is worth at least skimming and it appears to be open access - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3479631/ From the end of the summary:Finally, encouragement of a culture which allows for male vulnerability is a major goal. Men are not supposed to be emotionally vulnerable in our present culture, yet they encounter pressures on a daily basis to be more muscular and meet the current male body shape ideals. This is deleterious for many men as they feel pressure from many sources to meet mainstream society's definition of masculine. Also, men are not supposed to be focused on how they look, so why would they reveal body image or weight concerns?
Here's another article by Räisänen and Hunt, "The role of gendered constructions of eating disorders in delayed
help-seeking in men: a qualitative interview study" https://bmjopen.bmj.com/content/4/4/e004342.short (it's also open access, if you want to read the full article click the PDF link on the right). And before people start dismissing qualitative studies - they're are extremely useful. A quote from this article,Many presented late in their illness trajectory when ED behaviours and symptoms were entrenched, and some felt that opportunities to recognise their illness had been missed because of others’ lack of awareness of EDs in men. In addition, the men discussed the lack of gender-appropriate information and resources for men with EDs as an additional impediment to making sense of their experiences, and some felt that health and other professionals had been slow to recognise their symptoms because they were men.5
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