SBF2 Reboot Boogaloo! July 19th

yoginimary

I'm off today - not until 6 tonight though.

I need to get "Bohemian Rhapsody" out of my head now. I listened to the lyrics the other day, now they won't stop. I blame you, V - if you didn't post the thing the other day on FB, I wouldn't have paid attention.

Today - I'm thinking bike ride this morning. It will be hot, but I think I need to get outside. If I can find a nice yoga class, I'll do that too. Most likely, I won't be able to post until August 6th.

Oh, and my advice, MM - stop weighing yourself. :flowerforyou:

Vancouver bound, boogaloo!

lotusfromthemud

Paying for my excess yesterday. Really didn't eat or drink that much, but it was all very rich, and I guess I'm not used to rich anymore. The body is not happy with me.

So, today, the plans are:

Zumba, chiropractor, working and probably naptime. My massage yesterday was super intense, (at one point, I said, "hey are you holding onto my arm so I can't punch you in the face?" and I was only half kidding.) but I gained some neck mobility (and strangely, hearing) that had been missing for a while. (apparently, the neck muscle I'm having issues with goes behind the ear, and I've been having this sort of underwatery hearing for a bit now).

My goals didn't go so well last week. I gave into some stress eating due to no-exercise related depression. Nothing huge or binge-y, but bad choices too often (sample: popcorn for dinner three nights in a row). So, the goals for the week are the same as last week: protein and vegetables at every meal/snack, plenty of water, and six cardio/ three strength exercise (shoulder permitting) sessions. I had about 70% of those goals last week, and right now a C isn't good enough.

I got very good "how to write/do a project" advice yesterday. Essentially, you open up a document and write a stream of consciousness sort of messy outline. Then, you fill it in, edit it, make it fancy, until it's a finished product, all under the mantra "hey, it's just a draft". I managed to outline my entire presentation yesterday...something I've been trying to tackle for months. It's a pretty ugly skeleton, but hey, it's just a draft. I'll work on filling some stuff in today. The acquaintance has written his entire (nearly 700 pages...gulp) dissertation this way.

Just a draft, boogaloo.:flowerforyou:

p.s. Sorry about the earworm, Mary.

mechanicmom

Mary, I hope you have an awesome trip! We will definitely miss you here. When are you leaving? Tomorrow? Oh and I will work on not weighing myself as much. I guess the numbers are messing with me some but it's also the fact that my clothes aren't any looser either.

V, glad you are getting some adjustments made on your back and neck that are helping. Try not to overdo it today.

Yesterday was interesting. I had the migraine and then later we went to our friend's house with the pool. I still was not well but the pool helped a lot. It really relaxed me. Then we found out the Alex had stepped/fallen into a cactus! He had little red needles in his legs, feet, arms, hands, and tummy. Ugh. There were literally hundreds. It took about 45 minutes or so to get most of them out. He still has rash spots today, but he seems fine. He never cried. He only winced a little while daddy was pulling the tummy ones out. What a brave little boy. He didn't even tell us when it happened. He just went on playing. He decided to get back in the pool, and then he said, "You wanna wash your hands?" That's when I saw the needles. Oi. It could have been worse.

I am still a little "hungover" today and still feeling un-energetic. So goal is to drink lots of water, start second week of C25k. I assume my lack of energy (and migraine) has to be because of my upcoming cycle. I can't work out as long as I was a couple of weeks ago. That could be because running on the treadmill takes it out of me or for the former reason. I am going to try to run today and then do some Taebo, either abs or glutes. I'm not giving up. I have to keep going. DH has been on the treadmill everyday for a week. So proud of him!

Chatty today boogaloo!
MM

cp005e

Hi ladies - I'm alive! It's too late for me to write much but I just finished reading all the threads I missed from the past couple of weeks. Sorry I went missing for so long. :frown: So much has been happening and changing that it's just been all I can manage to keep up with it.

I'll tell you more about everything tomorrow, but I just wanted to pop in and say 'hi'. And, let you know that I am finally back on the workout wagon - enough feeling sorry for myself because of work and injury. More to come!

Prodigal pebble, boogaloo!

lotusfromthemud

CP!!!!! We've been thinking of you. I feel you on the transition difficulty. Push through, the workouts will make it better.

Today, it's Zumba, then some walking downtown, some more travel plans (getting the cat sitter) and resting the shoulder. I am bored with resting the shoulder, as this means no boxing. I'm hoping to be up to it by Friday with my trainer.

Having a really hard time staying focused with my eating, which has frankly been a mess since last week. (look at the food diaries...if you dare!) I'm going to examine this today/try to get a handle on it. So, the other goal today is no (more) sugar, lots of water and vegetables. I think I only have so much discipline....when I keep up in one area (like getting some actual schoolwork done) then I find it more difficult to be thrifty with money, or eat correctly...it's like I can do my housework, and plan meals and exercise and work on a project, but after a certain number of things (four? five? six? one?) , I need something to be naughty about. I continue to be a problem child. Or, this may be human nature...thoughts? I love to make rules, and I love to break them. Maybe I just need less rules. Or more rules. I'm confused and cranky.

Bratty, boogaloo.:flowerforyou:

mechanicmom

CP! So happy to see you! Welcome back! How's the job? Adjusting okay?

V, it's human nature. Human nature is all about self and how we can make it happy. Feeling/do something naughty makes our flesh feel happy, or satisfied, temporarily. I wish we could do away with human nature. Life would be better for everyone. That's just my thought.

I guess the migraine was hormonal as AF announced her coming with cramps yesterday. It doesn't seem like it's been a month. It snuck up on me! So that would explain a lot of things that have been going on with me the last few days.

Goals today: get my house work done, do some stuff with Alex (I often say this and not do anything. bad mommy. ), take him to tumbling class, get a work out in. We may go get frozen yogurt tonight and watch the planes with friends. Another goal is not to step on the scale until AF is gone.

Making progress boogaloo!
MM

cp005e

Hi there. I'm still feeling completely overwhelmed - just at a new place! However, I think my boss at least somewhat understands this and seems to want to make it better. I'm still hopeful that this will be a much better place in the long run - it just may be awhile before I see any real improvements "on the ground". There is so much to do, and because my position is permanent (a lot of people are contract), everyone is looking to me to provide guidance and make decisions for everything - which is good, and flattering, but it means I'm spending more time managing other people (not really my job) instead of engineering (which is my job). I think I have enough issues and tasks on my list from the first week and a half to keep me busy for the next year or so. Also, on-call has been a bit intrusive so far (although that "shouldn't" be the end state). So, I'm trying to figure out how to be rational about it. Out of desperation to not fall farther behind, I am tempted to put in long hours... but I really don't want to go down that path again. I have to remind myself (and my boss) that if there's more work than 3 people can do, there's no point in me killing myself trying to do it. They got themselves into the situation, and I can help, but I can't do it all. Now, I just have to figure out how to actually say no and figure out what I can do.

I haven't been getting my daily walks in since I left my old job (I had a couple friends who would walk with me most days). But I did go to the gym on Saturday, rock climbing on Sunday, bike riding on Monday, and belly dancing on Tuesday. So, progress. I fully expect to gain 5 pounds once I get back into workout groove, so I'm prepared for that (it looked like I was up 3 this morning). That's just what my body does, apparently.

Not sure if I am working late, working out, or taking a night off today. It probably ought to be one of the last two options.

V, I know what you mean. I definitely find myself "rebelling against myself" sometimes - and I'm not nearly as organized or disciplined as you are to begin with! The rules are there to help you feel comfortable and in control - but YOU should still be in control. It's hard to figure out sometimes whether you're breaking them just because you want to rebel SOMEWHERE, or because you actually want that particular thing, or just need a break. Personally, I need "blank space". I simply can't think or function with any sort of self-control unless I have a certain amount of quiet, unstructured, unscheduled time (usually spent reading or talking/writing friends). I have a friend who works, has kids, and basically has all but about an hour of his day planned out, every day. I'm not sure I could continue to function as a human being without a little more blank space on the schedule than that.

OK, I gotta run. Hope you feel better today, MM - sounds like you getting lots done! Oh, and that's awesome that you got a treadmill.

Hi-ho, hi-ho, it's off to work I go, boogaloo. :flowerforyou:

mechanicmom

Good morning,

CP, the first few weeks of a new job are always tough. I hope you get settled in fast. :flowerforyou: I gained about five pounds when I started working out again a few months ago, so my body does the same thing. At least you are prepared for it. I wasn't.

V, how are you feeling today?

Today is my super busy day. I will try to get my week 2 day 2 of C25k in. I may not get anything else done exercise wise because I am still feeling low energy. AF has still not shown up (wonder if she's going to skip again) :grumble: . Every time I change something in my exercise schedule or my eating, it messes my cycle all up. It's very frustrating.
Other than exercise I am going to do house work, run all my normal Wednesday morning errands, and go to church tonight.
I saved calories to have ice cream last night. I don't think I saved enough though. We went to a new place where you could put on your own toppings, and they had a lot of stuff to choose from. I did a mix and match sort of thing and had way too many toppings. I'm sure my sugar level was through the roof, but I didn't feel over stuffed or sick (lactose intolerance) so that's a great thing. I consider it a victory.
I'd better get to work. I have a lot to do before we have to leave in an hour.
MM

lotusfromthemud

Bad day yesterday. Found out I didn't get the choir director position I had applied for. They had lots and lots of wonderful things to say to me, so it was weird to me. Kind of, "if you think I'm so cool why didn't you hire me?" It's interesting to me that I discovered only after I didn't get it that I really wanted it. I feel, as I put it to my husband "professionally invisible" since entering grad school. It's hard to feel like the grinding work on my academic stuff matters sometimes. I know that it does, but I'm sort of pouty. It just doesn't feel like "real" work sometimes, and the fulfilment level is super low. Was up most of last night stewing, wondering and crying. Rejection is hard.

Also, had to go to a funeral this a.m., so pretty tired out now.

Today's goals are: a walk, a trip to the chiro, and some rest with lots of hydrating, and trying to focus forward on what is next instead of what I thought might be next, but isn't next. Normally this would be a weights class day, but I don't want to aggravate the shoulder. It's already aggravated. I have to figure out how to work around it, because it doesn't quite feel safe to work through it.

What's next, boogaloo.:flowerforyou:

Bobbie145

Hi, everyone! I am turning into a slug! I am really enjoying being at home more, but it is hard to get motivated to crank the work out sometimes. I get stuff done, but it feels funny to not have to work all the time. Maybe I'm finally getting the hang of "part time"?? I like having a cup of coffee in bed in the morning before I get up. I finally got a little exercise in this morning. I moved our bedroom around and put the treadmill in a different place. Used it this morning for the first time in weeks. Then I did some crunches with my ab cruncher thingy. Then I used my 8 pound medicine ball for some squats and overhead pushes. I dropped my gym membership, again. I just wasn't going. I'm hoping I can keep my motivation going at home and use what I have here. My ten year old and I also went bowling today. I took 4 boys to see Knight and Day yesterday. It was a fun movie. The boys (ok, me, too) loved the chase scenes and the crashes and the blowing stuff up parts. There were some funny lines in it, too.

So, goals are to keep the eating in some kind of moderation, exercise at least some every day, and drink that water!!!

Here we go, boogaloo!!!


Bobbie

mechanicmom

I never post in my blog, but I posted something today called Smart Eating. You all may have seen it before. I hadn't and thought it was interesting and so simple, I was thinking, "Duh!"

MM

mechanicmom

Good morning,

How is everyone today? What's your plan for movement?

I got my grocery list mostly done yesterday, then two things happened. I read the article I posted in my blog, which made me feel convicted, but not enough to change me list. Then Steve looked at the recipes I had set aside to make. He said, "You shouldn't eat this." Ugh! I had too many bread/carb items. It's comfort week in the MM household. He said it all sounds good but that next week I will be complaining because I haven't lost any weight. I like that he's trying to help me but I hate that he's right. It wasn't like really bad food, but it was too much breaded stuff. So now I have to find less carby things that will make food stretch through the week on a budget. It makes me a little miserable now (having to say no to self) but I know I will feel better about it later.
I passed up the "cookies" at the farmer's market yesterday but I ended up getting trail mix which is probably worse. I separated servings into baggies so I won't eat the whole bag in one day. I'm just having hard time. lol
Today is: grocery shopping, walking 30 min on treadmill, and hopefully some taebo upper body. And some cleaning. I slacked off yesterday in that department, so I need to catch up before it gets out of hand.

Changing the way I think about and eat food boogaloo!
MM

lotusfromthemud

Morning pebbs,

Yesterday, I broke down and, at the urgings of my chiro, tried acupuncture for my shoulder. I fell asleep on the table :yawn: (with over 20 needles in me) apparently this is quite common. Then, I came home and slept for 14 more hours. Apparently, my chi told me I was tired.:laugh: Almost immediately, the scar tissue was "mushier" (that's the term my osteo used and I could feel it moving around more and being less ouchy). I've always been skeptical, but I'm convinced. Apparently, it tricks the body into thinking it's injured and releases endorphins. I'm a fan of anything that releases endorphins, but doesn't involve chemicals.

Today, my plan for movement (I'm totally stealing that, MM ) is to move forward on my comps presentation (the new "it's only a draft" is magical...I've gotten a messy version of my notes/organization down for the first half hour or so) a grocery list, a Zumba class, and some grocery shopping. I haven't been eating at home as much as I should be. I eat better when my husband is working, which is something I need to think about. Just because two people are eating together doesn't make it a party.

Also, I quit logging food again. With my new nutrition deal, you log to check your compliance for the first month, then quit logging. I've developed a new question to ask myself about food "what will satisfy me?" I really have hardcore cravings that creep in when I restrict too much. My exercise levels are high enough that I can handle a fair amount of carbs, and when I cut them too low, I get all cookie crazy. I'm still aiming to restrict sugar and alcohol to once a week, but other than that, just eating what I want in satisfying (but not stuffing my face without paying attention) portions. I rebel too much if I restrict too much. What I need is a balance between intuitive eating and sensible, balanced eating. If I go all the way intuitive, I end up living on cookies and cheese. If I go all the way restricted, I end up with the urge to binge on cookies and cheese. See, I'm learning.

Hey, where'd WL go? Come back. Mary's on her way to Vancouver, and my West-coast loving heart is jealous.

Know thyself, boogaloo. :flowerforyou:

wanderinglight

Hello hello! I'm here! Big changes have been afoot these past few weeks -- I was out walking with my boyfriend and we spotted a house in Santa Monica that seemed tailor made for the two of us, so we moved in together...the next day! It's been a whirlwind and the house didn't have internet access until we got it hooked up today. It was kind of nice to be off the grid for two weeks!

Anyway, I'm so happy and although it's completely crazy, we are both feeling like it was the exact right thing to do.

In other news, I got "in trouble" with the network for dating someone from the show. Even though I no longer produce the show and it's four months later now!

I'm still getting caught up on the other posts, lots of new updates from the SBF team to catch up on!

Great to see you all here, especially the other wayward souls like me -- CP and Bobbie!

cp005e

Hi all. It's so nice to see how you all are doing. I hope Mary is having fun on her vacation!

WL, that's amazing - congrats! I'm happy for you - and poo-poo on the network for giving you a hard time. Enjoy your new digs. What about the beautiful new floors at your old apartment?
V, I'm so sorry that the job didn't work out. We all know how awesome you are. Interesting with the acupuncture - I have never known anybody who tried it, but maybe it is worth a shot.
MM, good luck with your grocery list! Keep it up - you are helping inspire me that I can get back on track with my workouts. :flowerforyou:
Bobbie, I'm jealous of your part-time summer schedule! I liked Knight and Day - totally silly summer fun (and exactly what I needed a couple of weeks ago).

Today was absolutely crazy for me. There is so much going on at my new job, and it's hard to know whether or not things will ultimately work out. I still believe that they will... but it is at least as busy right now as I was before. Oh, I got a desperate email from my old job today, too. At least I can't really feel guilty about not calling them - I was swamped all day, and even my dinner was work-related! Oh well. I'll do my best, and if I lose confidence that this job is going to work out... well, I'll just figure something out. There's only so much crazy I have room for any more. But, I'm still optimistic, because at least my boss seems to be a lot more protective and rational about things in the long run than at my old job.

Unfortunately, I didn't manage to get much movement in. I did take a quick walk outside, though - and that's something.

Change is in the air, boogaloo!

mechanicmom

Hi Pebbles.
I'll just be honest. I have had a rotten evening and night. Just when we thought things couldn't get any worse with the adoption, it did. To make a very long story short, Steve emailed Olga and asked some questions. Found out some of our paper work expired in June and we have to redo it all by September, 30+ documents and have them notarized and sent to Austin to be stamped by the state. Steve emailed back and asked if there is anything else that needs to be done to make sure we are 100% ready. In the nicest way he could he expressed that we have felt that not having things ready ahead of time has delayed the process before, and we want to get this done as quickly as possible. Anyway, leaving out a whole lot of details, she lost it. She went off on us with the "How dare you after all we've done for you" speech. We were shocked. Our email was not meant to be taken in such a way. Basically as of last night she "fired" us. Steve sent her another email apologizing that his email offended her and was not meant that way. We get the feeling that something has been building for awhile, or maybe her job is in jeopardy or something. His email was not enough to cause a reaction like that. So this morning we are waiting to see if she will write back and still work with us or if the whole thing is off. We're in shock about it.
Anyway, my girl time came, that news came, and I indulged in too many sopapillas at dinner so I had a tummy ache until midnight or so. My hip is sore from walking/running so today is an unplanned day off. :frown: So the plan for today is to get the house back in order and play with Alex. Things will work out somehow. Breathe in, breathe out, move on.

Staying the course boogaloo.
MM

lotusfromthemud

Wow, I've determined that we all lead stressful lives. But, the more I think on it, everybody leads stressful lives. One of my goals lately has been to be as kind as possible. To myself (hard) and others (depending on the day, sometimes even harder). I'm sorry your experience continues to be so difficult, MM. Also, CP...I have confidence for you that things will get better. Wandering, you got "in trouble"? wow. And also, congratulations on the step of moving in to what sounds like a dream house. Bobbie, the less work I have, the more difficult it is for me to stay focused, so I'm admiring you.

I'm going through a bit of a "what is the universe trying to tell me?" crisis. Or maybe not a crisis, but a phase. I wish that something would be presented to me that works out, as these random job offers/rejections are starting to get to me. I need to find some validation that this current path is the right one, or at least a path to the right one. It's been a while since I've felt encouraged. Ennui, I have it.

Moving forward today will be: (I've already done my project work for the day...yay!) a voice lesson/session with my trainer (my first one in over a month), followed by another acupuncture session, then some travel planning/detail working through. The person who normally watches my cats can't for one of my weeks, so I have to call the crazy chain smoking cat sitter. The cats seem to love her, so that's good.

ennui, boogaloo.:flowerforyou:

wanderinglight

MM -- stay the course. I love that phrase and love your attitude. Sorry it has been such a tumultuous process for you. Sending calming thoughts your way!

More to follow...I have an evil hangover today and am barely hanging on. When will I learn. It's not just the extra calories from drinking too much, it also leads to bad choices like Huevos Rancheros and no motivation to exercise the next day. Blergh.

Viv -- I love acupuncture and have the utmost belief in it as a treatment. I've tried it myself when I was having back problems and felt changes almost immediately.

Phew, I'm worn out from typing. Must get back to lying on the sofa moaning and feeling sorry for myself...

mechanicmom

It's Saturday!
I think I am happy about that. We have nothing planned so I don't know how it will be any different than any other day except Steve is home.

I did not eat a lot yesterday, but I did not eat well at all. Today is not starting out well, though it was intended for good. I am trying to cut back on wheat, so I made gluten free veggie muffins. They are really good (which should have been my first clue ). I have made them before but apparently miscalculated how many cals the muffins had. About 300 each and I had two. :noway: No wonder I actually feel full. I have a tendency to think gluten free means healthy. I'm learning! So tomorrow I will have one muffin and some fruit or something.
Since I ate that much for breakfast I am going to get on the treadmill today! Today is week 2 day 3 of the C25k program. I will also try to do upper body again if I can muster up the energy. Still feel really tired even though I slept pretty good. I think it's more of a heart issue that is causing my physical body to feel exhausted.
We are pretty sure the adoption is over with this agency, so the question comes in whether to risk trying a different agency or to call it quits. I suppose something could still work out with Olga but we are not counting on it. In all honestly, of course I am sad, confused, frustrated, sad etc, but I also feel relief. I don't know why. I guess because we could possibly be freed up to do other things with our lives, like go on an extended vacation, move, etc. Anyway, we are not making any decisions yet.
Prayerful weekend boogaloo!
MM

lotusfromthemud

Morning pebbs,

Feeling close to full power today for the first time in weeks. The acupuncture is working pretty powerfully on me...it feels like it's turned off the muscle spasms, full stop. I was laying flat on the floor in savasana last night and realized...whoa...my shoulders are flat on the ground (this hasn't been the case for as long as I can remember). Also, slept about 11 hours last night. Working with my trainer yesterday (we did a weights workout, sort of a form checkup) really helped. I've decided to start working with her twice a week (we do a barter, which is the only way in heck I can afford such a thing) once on weights and once on TRX and boxing. I'm pretty excited. I'm pretty sure I'm doing something wrong or dangerous when I go to weights or boxing class, letting my ego pick my weights and I don't get checked for form.

Today, is recovery cardio and probably some housecleaning. I was going to go to yoga this morning at ten, and I was padding around thinking "I had probably better get ready to go soon" only to look at the clock and notice it was 10:25. I slept in more than I thought. Also, more project research (I'm starting to decide where to go do field work for my dissertation...both exciting and scary...) and a trip to the grocery. My cupboards (and my fridge, and my freezer), they are bare.

Yep, MM...I get into trouble with gluten free baking, too. Especially with almond flour and coconut flour (aka: the good ones). The good thing is, they do tend to fill you up, so they're slightly self-limiting, but man, the calories get high quickly. I think you deserve some rest...let that relief allow you to take a nap, and heal your troubled heart. The right path will present itself, I'm sure of it. (now, to get to believing that for myself, too... )

Peaceful thoughts to all, boogaloo.:flowerforyou:

mechanicmom

Update:
I worked out and I feel much better mentally and for a little while I was more awake. Now I am getting sleepy again. lol. I can tell I am getting more toned so that's an encouragement. I finished week two of C25K and ran a total of 7.5 minutes (not all at once), so that's more than I could do a couple of weeks ago.

Pushing through the pain (in all forms that it comes in) boogaloo!
MM

Bobbie145

Hi, all! Saturday night! Went to a cookout/ pool party last night and another one this afternoon. Now, I don't feel guilty about laying around the house!

I've managed to get back on my treadmill, use my stomach crunch thingy, and my medicine ball for the past several days. Yay!!! Still night eating great, but it's summer, and I always have a hard time with eating during the summer. Will keep trying to do better.

Love these summer evenings.

Bobbie

lotusfromthemud

Morning pebbs,

Hey, Bobbie, what workouts are you doing with your med ball? Do you have a program/DVD you're following. I've been thinking about getting one, but don't know what to do with it...I use one with my trainer, but it's toss it back and forth and such...so I don't really know what to do with one solo.

Yesterday was sort of a wash....I started laundry (no pun intended) and then started napping. I managed to complete zero of my goals, and made peanut butter cookies for dinner. Blergh. I'm struggling a bit with general mope-itude as of late. Worries and anxiety, if they were a cash crop, would have made me a millionaire by now. Especially those that fall under the categories of "probably not that big of a deal" and "mostly in my brain, not in the world."

Today, it's Zumba at noon, (which I'm hoping will snap me out of my funk a bit) followed by some quality time with my husband. I've been deprived of quality time in general for a few weeks...must figure out more leisurely activities for the hot weather. I'm backwards from most people. I do less in the summertime, as far as going out is concerned.

Summertime mopeytime, boogaloo.:flowerforyou:

lotusfromthemud

also, new blog boogaloo.

mechanicmom

Hi Ladies,

Not getting any exercise today, unless laughing at Alex quoting from the movie "UP" counts. He's cracking me up. I need a good laugh.

We went to church and had lunch with new friends afterwards. That's about it. We're looking at other options to adopt from Russia, but we're not making any decisions until God says, "Go." More waiting. 2010 has been the year of waiting for us. Maybe we've produced a lot of patience this year.
Tomorrow I will start week 3 of C25k which looks quite a bit harder. Hope I can do it! I will also get back to logging food. I've slacked off the last few days. But I feel a little smaller, so we'll see.

Not much news boogaloo!
MM