Seeking words of encouragement!!!

mholl15

Hello friends. Today is my first time logging in, in a while. I was very consistent logging in everyday last year, which led to me losing 35 lbs. I have since gained about 15 of that back and steadily trending down hill. However, I'm am trying to get back on the wagon for now.

I lost my girl in February (break-up) and my mom passed in April. I'm single, have a roommate now and I just cannot stick to anything. I'm finding it very hard to hit the gym after work, go for walks in the evenings and I have a hard time declining slices of pizza and drinks of alcohol. My motivation is gone and I cannot grasp any self discipline.

I know how important this site is especially each and everyone reading this. Can anyone just lend some tips or words of encouragement or things you dig into when times get hard and you regain your focus. Anything can help. Thanks guys.

tinkerbellang83

Perhaps just start small, commit to a week of logging, regardless of whether you hit your calorie allowance, just log absolutely everything. The next week set it for maintenance and aim for that and the following week a small deficit.

Same with fitness stuff, start by committing to an extra 15 minute walk at some point during your day (maybe on your lunch break or on your way home from work) and then the next week add another after work, then perhaps after that start back at the gym or do some home workouts.

I am in exactly the same situation at the moment, I lost 35lbs in 2017 and kept it off for a year, some work and life stress triggered my binge-eating and I've gained about 15lbs of fat back.

I would suggest perhaps trying to find some way of dealing with your emotions from your break up/mom passing away whether that be talking to someone (either a friend or a professional) or finding a coping method other than reaching for the fridge/alcohol.

Avoiding alcohol a while might help too, it's a depressant at the end of the day and if your head isn't in the right space, it won't help.

maureenseel1984

mholl15 wrote: »

Hello friends. Today is my first time logging in, in a while. I was very consistent logging in everyday last year, which led to me losing 35 lbs. I have since gained about 15 of that back and steadily trending down hill. However, I'm am trying to get back on the wagon for now.

I lost my girl in February (break-up) and my mom passed in April. I'm single, have a roommate now and I just cannot stick to anything. I'm finding it very hard to hit the gym after work, go for walks in the evenings and I have a hard time declining slices of pizza and drinks of alcohol. My motivation is gone and I cannot grasp any self discipline.

I know how important this site is especially each and everyone reading this. Can anyone just lend some tips or words of encouragement or things you dig into when times get hard and you regain your focus. Anything can help. Thanks guys.

So I went through something similar recently-not with regards to loss (my mom passed in 2012), but just...in a slump and feeling very depressed and lost in my life.
There are two great books I read that helped me a lot. "Outrageous Openness" by Tosha Silver and "The Gifts of Imperfection" by Brene Brown.

What I took away from both is that there is a bigger plan...and something/someone bigger out there. Our direction in life is already chosen for us and we just have to follow our hearts. It suddenly lets you see things with a silver lining much more easily. Breakups suck-no way around it...but maybe it had to happen because you'll meet someone else-or because for you right now it's the best thing for you to be alone/on your own.

As far as fitness goes and food, etc...when we focus on other things...on joy (not happiness-happiness is situational, joy is a state of mind and being), suddenly the other things fall into place. We nurture and nourish our bodies because we see what a beautiful gift it is to HAVE a body-to have a body that is healthy and can do things-someone always has it worse than we do.

It helped me a lot to take the focus off myself and try to do something for someone else every day. It can be something small...smiling, saying hi or good morning while holding the door for someone...buying the drink of the person behind you in the coffee line. Compliment someone. Soon you realize we're all sharing all these experiences-others go through similar hardships and we're all in it together.

Much much love and many positive vibes going your way today!

Maureen

hansep0012

The passing of your mom is profound, please accept my condolences.

For encouragement, remind yourself that by utilizing MFP again you demonstrate your understanding of how this tool helped you previously and that there is every reason to believe that it will help you now with your new goal. You know how to use the tool and even more, you know how to reach out to other people on the site. This is amazing and good stuff!

I share with you a tip that has helped me recently. Over a period of time I thought about a strategy that would pick me up when I was struggling (motivation, snacking, dealing with emotions, etc.) and it had to be something that was instant, didn't cost money, and strengthened me. I crafted in my mind a vision of why I was doing this and how I looked. Last night I called up this snap shot of me in my mind as I was driving home. I needed to remind myself that even though it was way past dinner time, my vision of myself did not benefit from a drive through meal. My vision of myself did not include pub grub from the taproom where my husband indicated he had eaten. My vision helped me let go of the anger I felt when my husband promised to make dinner that night and did not. My vision confirmed that my nine holes of golf with my friends was worthy of a healthful, homemade dinner.

Do you have a tip that helps you overcome challenges? Would you be willing to share?