Food temptation and self-control

aziz_n1

Once again the weekend has been a real challenge in self-control food wise. Glad to say I managed to stay within my calorie allowance on both days without having done much hard exercise. Half the battle in this constant fight to stay in shape & maintain or lose weight seems to involve denying oneself . certain.pleasures

zippie2223

That or do what I do. 4 hour bike ride as hard as you can manage then eat what ever you want.

bluesheeponahill

I found, I’m not sure I’d call it intermittent fasting, but it’s the basically what it’s known as, I found delaying my eating window on weekends a huge help. It gave me better control over calories. If I know it’s going to be a big weekend I can either skip breakfast until 12ish or delay until 10am and close of eating and drinking (with exception of water) by 6pm. Doing this meant my calorie allowance was larger per main meal. If you can sort of map out your weekend meals you might find it easier to manage the calorie intake for that day.

AndreaLouLou

I've been doing this for 2 and a half years almost. I felt very much like you for around 6 months. I don't have that problem anymore. It goes away. Try and keep busy. Bubblegum helps, so does chewing gum. Sugar free of course. I found over time, that if I permanently stayed away from treats, I rarely craved them anymore. I no longer eat chocolate, cheese or sweets. So I no longer crave them. If I cave in, which I have done many times, the cravings start back up.

brenn24179

you get the pleasure of getting fit. Eating all that food just isn't worth it, I feel terrible when heavy

Danp

What is your rate of loss? Struggling and feeling like you constantly having to deny and deprive yourself could very well be an indication that your deficit is too aggressive.

I've always been of the mind that losing 1lb per week happily and effortlessly is a far better way to live your life than losing 2lb per week and being constantly miserable.

NovusDies

I moderate my treat food and I bank calories to make my weekends easier. I had to. I have been through 73 weekends so far and I can't imagine white-knuckling my way through that many.

BradandLibby

OP, I feel the same way. I know I can no longer eat whatever I want, whenever I want it. I do miss the days when I didn’t think about my eating; of course my weight and my health suffered due to that. I know I can still have whatever I want, as long as I plan for it. The outcome is worth the planning and moderation. And truthfully, as I look back I don’t feel as if I was deprived of anything. I still went/go to happy hours and parties; I just have to be super cognizant of my choices. And unfortunately, that’s just life for me. As it is for almost everyone who is at a normal weight (we don’t really see that, though.). Good luck!

MelanieCN77

I don't think anybody outside ED has the wherewithall to deprive themselves constantly. Sometimes it just does feel like that for spells and you get into a bubble where you feel like it's gonna be like that forever. I'm guessing that's where OP is. Good job on keeping to cals for the holiday weekend! I most certainly did not.

NovusDies

For me willpower has to be the last tool in the box to get called upon. It is for those days where things have gone badly but in a way that eating more will not make anything better. The victory those days is staying mostly in my calorie goal and losing weight for the day. Those days, thankfully, happen very rarely for me.

Also, for me, continued deprivation leads to mental fatigue and that is when things have really fallen apart in the past. I avoid this now by always trying to find a way to answer my wants with a conditional yes instead of an absolute no.

snickerscharlie

NovusDies wrote: »

For me willpower has to be the last tool in the box to get called upon. It is for those days where things have gone badly but in a way that eating more will not make anything better. The victory those days is staying mostly in my calorie goal and losing weight for the day. Those days, thankfully, happen very rarely for me.

Also, for me, continued deprivation leads to mental fatigue and that is when things have really fallen apart in the past. I avoid this now by always trying to find a way to answer my wants with a conditional yes instead of an absolute no.

Bingo!

When I was in my weight loss phase, having to white knuckle it over and over told me that something was out of whack if that was the only option left to me. Sure, using that tool occasionally is fine, but as a matter of course? Nope. Not likely going to be successful in the long run, because human nature.

Keep_on_cardio

Sounds tricky in the beginning and after awhile it will get easier. I promise you can enjoy food and still reap benefits of getting fit. You got this! Keep moving forward 💜

NovusDies

snickerscharlie wrote: »

NovusDies wrote: »

For me willpower has to be the last tool in the box to get called upon. It is for those days where things have gone badly but in a way that eating more will not make anything better. The victory those days is staying mostly in my calorie goal and losing weight for the day. Those days, thankfully, happen very rarely for me.

Also, for me, continued deprivation leads to mental fatigue and that is when things have really fallen apart in the past. I avoid this now by always trying to find a way to answer my wants with a conditional yes instead of an absolute no.

Bingo!

When I was in my weight loss phase, having to white knuckle it over and over told me that something was out of whack if that was the only option left to me. Sure, using that tool occasionally is fine, but as a matter of course? Nope. Not likely going to be successful in the long run, because human nature.

Right. And understand that I distinguish willpower from the normal everyday discipline that comes with being an adult. If I want something high calorie I usually make myself wait for a day or more to make sure it is something I really want and not just a passing whim. Indulging every whim would obviously turn out badly if you did it all the time.

cbstewart88

I outwit my brain this way: I trade. Do I want 1/2 bag of crappy potato chips? Or do I want a steak dinner with an ice-cold martini? Do I want that stale muffin? Or do I wait for my favorite sweet treat - Key Lime Pie. Knowing that I can pass up something "meh" and just wait for what I REALLY want helps. I don't feel deprived. I just feel discerning and patient and a bit snobby - LOL.

sgt1372

aziz_n1 wrote: »

Half the battle in this constant fight to stay in shape & maintain or lose weight seems to involve denying oneself certain pleasures

The key is to STOP thinking of eating the food you want/like as a "reward" and not being able to eat that food as a "deprivation" or "penalty."

Food is just food. You need to eat certain nutients to remain healthy and to limit your cals to a certain level to lose wt (&/or maintain it) at a healthy level.

Eating sufficient nutrients w/in your cal limit is the goal and, if you're doing that, that should be "reward" enough and there's no reason why you have to deny yourself any food "pleasures" to do this.

I certainly don't.

phred_52

Just started working out again 5/23...gave up all my fave comfort foods...especially pints of Ben & Jerrys Pistachio Ice Cream....Am I correct in understanding that I can still eat a pint or two weekly? As much as I really really want to, I just look at those fat calories..680...ouch.

Calories 280 x 4 = 1120 cal Fat cals 170 x 4 = 680 cal

So now I almost cry knowing I must walk on past. ...think that a crying emoti.

snickerscharlie

phred_52 wrote: »

Just started working out again 5/23...gave up all my fave comfort foods...especially pints of Ben & Jerrys Pistachio Ice Cream....Am I correct in understanding that I can still eat a pint or two weekly? As much as I really really want to, I just look at those fat calories..680...ouch.

Calories 280 x 4 = 1120 cal Fat cals 170 x 4 = 680 cal

So now I almost cry knowing I must walk on past. ...think that a crying emoti.

It depends on how badly you want it, and what you are willing to give up to make room for it without screwing up your calories too much.

There's nothing wrong with fat, btw, it's an essential part of a healthy diet. A pint a week should be manageable enough to work into your meal plan, broken down into 4 or 5 servings. Two pints would likely be stretching it, though, because that many calories could crowd out too many other nutrients in your week.

The point is if there's a caloric food item that you particularily love, it's usually better to find a way to include it once in a while in appropriate serving sizes than deny yourself outright. Because when this journey starts to feel too punitive, or you find yourself assigning moral condemnation or fortitude and virtue to a serving of ice cream, a "Screw it!" binge may be in your future. Which is usually followed by feelings of worthlessness, regret, even hopelessness. And an "Obviously, I can't do this!" mindset, which causes so many people to give in and give up.

NovusDies

snickerscharlie wrote: »

phred_52 wrote: »

Just started working out again 5/23...gave up all my fave comfort foods...especially pints of Ben & Jerrys Pistachio Ice Cream....Am I correct in understanding that I can still eat a pint or two weekly? As much as I really really want to, I just look at those fat calories..680...ouch.

Calories 280 x 4 = 1120 cal Fat cals 170 x 4 = 680 cal

So now I almost cry knowing I must walk on past. ...think that a crying emoti.

It depends on how badly you want it, and what you are willing to give up to make room for it without screwing up your calories too much.

There's nothing wrong with fat, btw, it's an essential part of a healthy diet. A pint a week should be manageable enough to work into your meal plan, broken down into 4 or 5 servings. Two pints would likely be stretching it, though, because that many calories could crowd out too many other nutrients in your week.

The point is if there's a caloric food item that you particularily love, it's usually better to find a way to include it once in a while in appropriate serving sizes than deny yourself outright. Because when this journey starts to feel too punitive, or you find yourself assigning moral condemnation or fortitude and virtue to a serving of ice cream, a "Screw it!" binge may be in your future. Which is usually followed by feelings of worthlessness, regret, even hopelessness. And an "Obviously, I can't do this!" mindset, which causes so many people to give in and give up.

I think some of this concern over macros comes from the app "warning" people when they eat a high macro food. It makes no sense to me.

@phred_52 one of the points of counting calories is to give ourselves freedom from dietary restrictions that might come with other plans. Ice cream is very nutritious and like @snickerscharlie says it can be a part of your plan if you really want it. I don't eat it often because I am a savory person but I have eaten it and still lost plenty of weight.

aziz_n1

Really enjoying reading the posts in response to my original. I agree that we should not be really harsh to ourselves and allow the odd treat. The old saying about everything in moderation seems a good philosophy. Everyone has their weakness, mine being my love of desserts & puddings. Been another good day though, below my calorie allowance again and not feeling any negative side effects. Seem to be stroking a good balance now between what I’m eating and how much exercise to burn the calories.