I knew something was wrong with my wifes diet plan.

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  • Mother_Superior
    Mother_Superior Posts: 1,624 Member
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    I remember this one time, I bought a car that worked exactly as it should have. I couldn't wait to get it to a mechanic so he could fix it.
  • NaomiJFoster
    NaomiJFoster Posts: 1,450 Member
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    My question is, why isn't she doing this herself?


    That's what I was thinking. It's her body, her weight loss. By doing her logging for her, you're depriving her of the opportunity to learn how her own food and exercise choices effect her own weight and health. Are you doing this secretly and controlling her diet without her knowledge? Or is she passively doing what you tell her to do in hopes that you'll fix it all for her? Either way, she should be doing it herself and have total control and ownership of her own life.
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member
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    I remember this one time, I bought a car that worked exactly as it should have. I couldn't wait to get it to a mechanic so he could fix it.

    It was a Honda, wasn't it?

    Everyone's always wanting to "fix" the Hondas.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    I'm confused...regardless of her height if she has lost 8 lbs in a month why wouldn't she continue doing what she's been doing?

    ^^^ this

    also, the difference in the amount of food shorter people need to eat is not actually all that much, if anything errors in the activity factor would count for much more. And they don't take frame size/lean body mass for height into account (Katch McArdle does, but it also doesn't bother with height) I'm 5'1" and large framed and probably have as much lean body mass as many women of 5'7".

    and the fact that she's succeeding tells me.... if it ain't broke don't fix it... if/'when the number of calories she's set to stops working, then worry about it. It's actually possible that the number for 5'1" could have been too low for reasons other than height (e.g. more activity, greater lean mass for height, etc) and your mistake gave her a better number of calories for her.
  • Mother_Superior
    Mother_Superior Posts: 1,624 Member
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    I remember this one time, I bought a car that worked exactly as it should have. I couldn't wait to get it to a mechanic so he could fix it.

    It was a Honda, wasn't it?

    Everyone's always wanting to "fix" the Hondas.

    Get outta my head!
  • MercenaryNoetic26
    MercenaryNoetic26 Posts: 2,747 Member
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    Let her take control, man.
  • MyJourney1960
    MyJourney1960 Posts: 1,133 Member
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    this:
    I'm confused...regardless of her height if she has lost 8 lbs in a month why wouldn't she continue doing what she's been doing?

    And this:
    My question is, why isn't she doing this herself?


    That's what I was thinking. It's her body, her weight loss. By doing her logging for her, you're depriving her of the opportunity to learn how her own food and exercise choices effect her own weight and health. Are you doing this secretly and controlling her diet without her knowledge? Or is she passively doing what you tell her to do in hopes that you'll fix it all for her? Either way, she should be doing it herself and have total control and ownership of her own life.
  • oldandhealthier
    oldandhealthier Posts: 449 Member
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    After 46 years of marriage I have learned it is best to blame it on someone else like a computer glitch.:wink:
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member
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    I remember this one time, I bought a car that worked exactly as it should have. I couldn't wait to get it to a mechanic so he could fix it.

    It was a Honda, wasn't it?

    Everyone's always wanting to "fix" the Hondas.

    Get outta my head!

    3597_zpse5469a24.jpg

    Seriously, WHY?? I bet there's a nitro tank in the trunk, too. Or a ridiculous sound system.

    *goes off to figure out whether gull wings can go on a C-RV*
  • ThriceBlessed
    ThriceBlessed Posts: 499 Member
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    Okay, like everyone else is saying it is working. I'd tell her of the mistake, but also say, "But for now your calorie level is working, lets recalculate if you stop losing."
  • Mokey41
    Mokey41 Posts: 5,769 Member
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    Unless she has more than 100 lbs to lose she shouldn't be eating at a 2 lb deficit to start with and 1300 calories is pretty low plus probably below her BMR. I'm 55, 5'2" and 115 lbs and my BMR is 1200. You might want to reevaluate the deficit setting you've chosen for her because you probably don't need to knock 500 calories a day off her budget.
  • jus_in_bello
    jus_in_bello Posts: 326 Member
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    Why isn't your wife doing this for herself?
  • ThriceBlessed
    ThriceBlessed Posts: 499 Member
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    After 46 years of marriage I have learned it is best to blame it on someone else like a computer glitch.:wink:

    Ha ha ha!
  • toutmonpossible
    toutmonpossible Posts: 1,580 Member
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    Ok heres the deal. I keep track and log in my wifes info on her eating. Every time she attempted it she got frustrated and walked away. I was the one that set up her account. Today after reading about the 1200 cal concern i felt compelled to look at hers. -2 a week and she was at 1800+ cal. Ok something wrong so i did a check on the info i set her up with. OMG i set her height at 5' 7" instead of 5' 1". I feel like such an *kitten*. However even with my mistake she has still be able to drop -8 lbs in 1 month. But think about what i have done, setting the bar down is not an easy thing to do after being use to eating 500 calories more. Shes at work right now so she doesn't know. Not sure how to err break this error i made to her.

    Did you see the thread "The Men Who Made Us Fat"? :laugh:
  • ThriceBlessed
    ThriceBlessed Posts: 499 Member
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    Unless she has more than 100 lbs to lose she shouldn't be eating at a 2 lb deficit to start with and 1300 calories is pretty low plus probably below her BMR. I'm 55, 5'2" and 115 lbs and my BMR is 1200. You might want to reevaluate the deficit setting you've chosen for her because you probably don't need to knock 500 calories a day off her budget.

    Yes, and sometimes even if you WANT a larger deficit you get better results achieving it through exercise rather than calorie deprivation, every time I drop my calories too low not only do I not lose weight, but after a few weeks of it I fall off the wagon and have a binge.
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member
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    In case quantity matters, I'll echo in: Why suggest she eat less when what she is eating is working? Don't change a thing until/if that calorie level stops working for her.

    If my husband asked me to eat 500 calories less just because ... :devil: :mad: :explode:
  • Mother_Superior
    Mother_Superior Posts: 1,624 Member
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    I remember this one time, I bought a car that worked exactly as it should have. I couldn't wait to get it to a mechanic so he could fix it.

    It was a Honda, wasn't it?

    Everyone's always wanting to "fix" the Hondas.

    Get outta my head!

    3597_zpse5469a24.jpg

    Seriously, WHY?? I bet there's a nitro tank in the trunk, too. Or a ridiculous sound system.

    *goes off to figure out whether gull wings can go on a C-RV*

    No idea. I've never had a car with matching doors, or without at least one part held on with a twisted coat hanger. Some day I hope to make enough money to gull wing and NOS out a Pacer.
  • crystalbishop5059
    crystalbishop5059 Posts: 19 Member
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    Every time she attempted it she got frustrated and walked away. I was the one that set up her account.

    ... and I bet every other time she was eating closer to 1300 calories and it was too hard to do. Let her lose at a slower, more maintainable pace. It will be easier for her to 'stick' with it. It's working for now - don't make this harder than it needs to be!
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member
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    Unless she has more than 100 lbs to lose she shouldn't be eating at a 2 lb deficit to start with and 1300 calories is pretty low plus probably below her BMR. I'm 55, 5'2" and 115 lbs and my BMR is 1200. You might want to reevaluate the deficit setting you've chosen for her because you probably don't need to knock 500 calories a day off her budget.

    He posted in another thread that she has more than 100 pounds to lose. The rate of loss is fine. If she was a much lower weight, she would not be losing at a rate of 2 pounds a week on 1800 calories.
  • MaggieGirl135
    MaggieGirl135 Posts: 986 Member
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    As you have no doubt picked up from the other posts, your behaviors are decidedly enabling. For your wife to make lasting change in her life, she has to have the desire strongly enough to drive her to do the steps that are needed. One of those, if MFP is chosen, is for her to spend a few moments to figure out how it works. We all know that it is fairly intuitive and that if a person decides to lose weight and maintain the loss, it is doable. I also agree with the comments from others that if your wife is losing weight with her current setting for MFP, then they should not be revised. Let her know of your error, offer to help her learn MFP, and then step aside and let her track it. Good luck.

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