When do we get to call it success?

lozenger1984

I've been watching this forum for years, hoping that one day I will get to post my success too.

Today I hit my target weight. I've lost >130lbs, I have a normal BMI (just) which is what I was aiming for.
I went from barely being able to jog for a minute to running a 10k.
Generally, I feel physically great now.

However, I don't feel the completion I thought I would. I think everything is still a work in progress. I still have so many goals. I probably still want to lose a tiny bit more. I was to increase my weightlifting and get the best tone I can. I am probably going to sign up for a half marathon next year. Then the challenge of learning maintenance (I've yo-yo'd massively, never maintained). I guess we're never really finished!

I have learnt so much along the way:
1.My tastes have changed. After radically overhauling my diet the stuff I used to love now makes me queasy - it's just too rich.
2. I have to log at least most of the time. I'll start sneaking in extra calories without realising if I don't.
3. Food scales are essential. I was soooo off about portion sizes.
4. Learning about food helps. I did a certificate in nutrition which helped me plan.
5. I can't imagine doing it alone. I've had a dietician and a personal trainer help me a lot. This forum has been a huge help, it's part of my life now.
6. It changes friendships and relationships. I don't eat socially often anymore, people have very varied reactions to weight loss.
7. My emotions have been tough. It's slightly gone from pride in my weight loss to embarrassment about how overweight I was. I've had to try to learn to deal with anxiety without food as an emotional crutch (and am still learning). I'm having to try and adjust to my new body which bears the marks of having been so overweight. This is still a huge work in progress.
8. I love to run. I can't believe I've ended up loving it! It was horrible originally but no I am so in love with what my body can do, it's a really freeing feeling. I love goal setting and am amazed by what I can do with time and effort.
9. I'm trying to learn to be kinder to myself.

All the best on your journies!

Replies

ceiswyn

Honestly, I think it's always going to feel like an ongoing process because life is an ongoing process.

But even though it turns out there isn't one moment where we can go 'I have Succeeded in being a slim, fit person For All Time', that's not a bad thing; we get to keep celebrating all the smaller, temporary successes we get en route. Grats on the 10k!

rainbow198

Congrats on your progress OP! I agree with the poster above. I will never consider myself "done" or say that I've made it.

I have lost a lot of weight and have kept it off for several years and I'm very proud of myself, but I still keep working.

Continuing to improve my fitness level, making new fitness goals, trying new workouts, sports and activities, discovering new fruits or veggies I've never tried before, trying new recipes and putting my own flavor on it, reading and researching health and nutrition topics etc. are some of the things that keep me going.

Also I will never forget where I started from. I have a pair of shorts that were tight on me when I first started. I can easily slip into one leg now even without unzipping them. It make me so proud to visibly see all that hard work I put in got me to my goal.

Those shorts reminds me that if I want to keep the weight off I still have to keep working at it.

NovusDies

For me success is always a future state. I consider an accomplishment a win. Those can be current or in the past.

When it comes to weight loss and fitness I fear contentment more than just about anything else. I don't believe I can afford to ever feel successful. I have lost too much weight and been through too much.

I think this subforum is more about how others view it. Even I view things differently when it is not a personal definition. I consider you a success and your continued success may be partly contingent on you not feeling the same.

Machafin

You hit your goals, so I would call that sucessful. Now make some new goals so you can stay on track. Great job!

stonesg

When you realize you've made a successful lifestyle change.

I remind people that, "I'm not ON a Diet, I've CHANGED my Diet.

LyndaBSS

I called it a success as soon as I started mfp. 👍

kerrymatch1982

Success is when you keep going ... ups and downs but you get back on track in my opinion ... well done on your huge weight loss and fitness

amyn73

My counselor just gave me really great advice. This journey is never over. It's not a diet, or a weight loss plan...it's a life choice. We all have to decide within ourselves that "this" will never be over. The thoughts that have plagued us our whole lives have set us up for failure. Now we need to turn to healthier thoughts....less about diets and more about lifestyles. Hope this helps!

seltzermint555

I think you're 100% a success.

Also, I think it's interesting and kind of awesome that I have lost almost the same exact amount and on almost every one of your numbered items, I feel differently and/or did things very differently. Only #2, 4, and 9 can I relate to!

Anyway, yes, hands down you are a success. Well done!

darklyndsea

This is what's called moving the goalposts, isn't it? When you achieve a goal, you have succeeded at that goal. Yes, there are more goals to come, but that doesn't negate your success. Back in school, when you finished first grade, you still had 11 more grades to go before graduating from high school, then college, a job, promotions... but that doesn't mean that you weren't a success at graduating from first grade. It's just one success after another!

snowflake954

Congrats OP! I agree that you have many more future successes ahead of you. That is not a bad thing-- to keep striving. Best of luck with your next goal.

mom23mangos

Wow, I definitely call that a success! Congratulations and I'm in awe of your running.

IAmTheGlue

Good job!

But you are right, it's ongoing. At no point is someone going to lay a heavy hand on your shoulder and say " Good job! It's all over now!" because that's how you get to start over again.

For me, success means doing better than I did before. So you can be a success story from day one, you just keep living that success and adding to it.

riffraff2112

Well done. Welcome to maintenance....remember it doesn't mean you have to stay the same weight. I bounce around a lot too, focus on weight training and add some mass, then sometimes get serious about cardio and lose a but of weight. I don't think I am ever happy, as you mention it is a work in progress. Only advice would be to not lose that motivation and discipline so find new things to move toward. It does sound like you are doing this so I am sure you will succeed in maintenance.
You look fantastic by the way if you don't mind me saying

SoHowLongIsThisGonnaTake

Can you tell me more about the varied responses to your weight loss from other people?

springlering62

I totally get where you are coming from.

Know the video game Katamari Damacy? Where you roll the snowball bigger and bigger til it absorbs cities and eventually planets? That’s weight loss for me.

So much conflicting information, opinions from others, food decisions and planning, scheduling excercise (is it enough? Can I do more?) time invested in learning and researching, time wasted carefully looking in the mirror pondering , “Do I really look different?”

Sometimes it just feels like it snowballs into a combination of drudgery and panic attack. Usually, though, it’s been simple but required resolve. The end result has been worth it.

I don’t know how to measure when weight loss “success” has been reached. But I do know when if I feel I’ve gotten there, I’ll be hesitant to apply that name for fear of slacking off and reverting to who I once was.

brenn24179

yes you are very successful! Enjoy.

Diatonic12

When do we get to call it success. We get to call you a success, today. You get to call it a success every single day. There is no such thing as the Finish Line. We can't ever go back to our old 'normal' way of eating without the same results. Your new way and our new way is the only way going forward...waaay into the future.

springlering62

@Diatonic12 what a great dog picture!!!!!!