Crying when I workout

mksafire
mksafire Posts: 23 Member
edited October 2019 in Motivation and Support
Hi Everyone. I need some support and I'm not sure where to go. I'm trying to hold on to my motivation to workout but I have some dark cloud that I'm fighting at the same time. I don't feel good.. so I try to get back into working out.. which makes me feel tired and depressed.. so I stop again for a while.. lots of negative self-talk.. and then I'm back again a week later trying to just get one basic workout in. Maybe it's a reminder of all the times I have stopped and started up again that gets to me right when I'm in the middle of this workout.. it's probably a mixture of different things. Suddenly I get very depressed and sad and feelings of loneliness wash over me and I start crying. Yup crying again.. here I am crying while I workout. The negative self-talk keeps on coming and gets me crying even more.

This is why I can't work out at the gym.. because-> spontaneous crying
This is why I can't go to workout classes.. because -> crying
This is why I am super embarrassed to get any trainer help or talk to a coach -> because sad crying

I don't want to be a downer. I am so tired of being sad. I am sooo tired of being so desperately lonely. I am tired of being lethargic and tired. What the hell kind of cycle is this?

So here I am... crying away.. lifting weights and trying to tell myself I can do it. That just makes me cry some more.

Anyone else here have a similar thing going on? What did you do to get through this?

I know it's a lot of things in my head. I am messed up. I have been through a lot.. but I'm here working out and trying to take care of myself. Why does the act of caring for yourself make you sad? Why do I break down when my muscles are tired and I want to give up? I know it's not that bad. I can get through this workout and then it will be over and I can move on with my day. I feel better when I'm stronger and fit. Why the emotions? What the hell do you do with all of these emotions??!!! I want to stress eat so bad.

Any help would be appreciated. I don't know what to do with myself right now. I'm working on trying to spend time with friends on the regular and get outside every day. The feels just gets me so hard sometimes. I'm afraid to dump this on a friend.. that usually doesn't go well and I don't really have anyone to talk to about this. So here I am internet people. Please help.

Anyone else? lift.. and cry.. lift.. and cry... lunge.. and cry... crunch... and cry..

Replies

  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,463 Member
    I would encourage you to share this with your doctor, do they can point you in the best direction and help you get any needed treatment.
  • ElizabethKalmbach
    ElizabethKalmbach Posts: 1,415 Member
    OK, DEFINITELY talk to your doctor and insurance about therapy options, FIRST.

    BUT, I cry for just about everything. Rage, sorrow, frustration - all ends in tears, which is generally why I'm stoic in public.

    HOWEVER, there is absolutely nothing wrong with having a good cry. Sometimes it helps more than it seems like it should. I have entire play lists for rage and sadness and melancholy and chaotic excitement and I put on whatever is appropriate and bang around the house emoting my little heart out and running or cleaning or dancing or clanking barbell plates around.

    Sometimes holding it in is tiring and letting it out is perfectly fine. Good for you, even.

    Self expression is a thing and you're totally allowed to do it whenever you want, as long as it ain't hurting anyone, and some tears when you work out ain't hurting a soul.
  • Shortgirlrunning
    Shortgirlrunning Posts: 1,020 Member
    Another vote for therapy. I’ve done therapy on and off throughout the years and it can be SO helpful! I think you would really benefit.

    I also completely agree with the person above that sometimes you just need a good cry. In fact, before I finally buckled down and got serious about weight loss I stepped on the scale, was horrified by the number I saw, and just sobbed. I cried a lot. And when I was done I made a plan. But I think I just needed to get all of those emotions out.

    And if you currently don’t feel comfortable working out around other people working out at home is an option too. YouTube has tons of workouts you can do in your own living room. FitnessBlender, PopSugarFitness, and Yoga with Adrienne are my go-tos.
  • emmamcgarity
    emmamcgarity Posts: 1,594 Member
    I’ll agree as others have suggested that therapy is a great resource you should consider. I can be very weepy when overcome with emotion. While reading your post I couldn’t help but wonder what your current goals are and you seem to have high expectations for yourself. I think you are adding stress to the situation. Perhaps start with smaller goals. Something you can do at home initially. A goal that is easy to achieve. A 10 minute walk each day perhaps? Or if the equipment you want to use is at your gym set a small goal of one exercise you will do each day. Go in quickly, do the one thing, then leave. You can build up to longer workouts later.
  • hesaves66
    hesaves66 Posts: 6 Member
    Hang in there - you are not alone even if it feels like it. There are a lot of caring people on this site and you mentioned friends as well. Don’t be so hard on yourself about your self talk. It seems it is a side effect of your general well being. If you can’t explore counseling at this time, try to redirect the negative self talk. When those thoughts come on, try to stop it before it sets in and think one good thing about you that is ok in your life and focus on that. It is very good that you are reaching out and I am amazed that you still work out with all you are feeling. I haven’t got on a regular workout schedule yet, so I know how hard it is to do even if you are feeling good in general.
  • elisa123gal
    elisa123gal Posts: 4,324 Member
    I had an experience, not reoccurring problem.. of the opposite. I would start laughing..no kidding..when my trainer pushed me too hard. It was really weird. It was like a coping mechanism because she was making me work out harder than I wanted. Id hate if that happened all the time when I worked out on my own. (and I don't have a trainer any longer)

    Negative self talk you can interrupt in your head...use positive affirmations and do go see a counselor who will help you take the pressure off yourself.

    You can lose weight...just change what you eat..it is that simple. You can do that. Exercising is for getting fit..and all you have to do is move. You can do that too.

    Also.. losing weight takes time..no one ever adds in that fact..you can't speed it up by beating yourself up. It would be like wanting to save 10,000 dollars and putting the pressure on yourself to have it in three months.. when in reality it would take longer period to save it.. but it could be done.
  • snowflake954
    snowflake954 Posts: 8,399 Member
    Agree with all the above posters that getting counseling could help you tremendously. Please give it a try. Find the right person who will give you coping strategies. You may only need the help for a short while, it's rarely permanent. It just sounds like you're digging a hole and can't get out. Look into what help is available to you. Best of luck.
  • CSARdiver
    CSARdiver Posts: 6,252 Member
    One of the guys frequenting the gym on base is a psychologist and routinely works out with his patients when they talk. Things get heated often and emotions run high. Now granted this is the Naval Special Warfare Preparatory School Gym, so you've got a mix of 18 year old recruits getting ready for BUD/S and 20 yr combat veterans. There have been several times when men start shouting, crying, and expressing emotions other than anger and rage - all signs of coming up to or emerging out of a breakthrough.

    All met with thunderous applause and support.

    I'm in the bucket of looking for a good counselor, someone who prioritizes fitness and can get you past trauma to growth.
  • akamran1
    akamran1 Posts: 78 Member
    I cry when I'm working out if I'm otherwise overwhelmed. But I know working out will help me feel better in the long run, so I just go with it. I wear a baseball cap while I'm on the rowing machine or whatever and just keep it pulled down enough for plausible deniability.

    Talk therapy might help, I don't know. But the physical therapy definitely helps manage emotions when I'm done working out.
  • aligisme
    aligisme Posts: 9 Member
    Agree you should seek help from a professional. You mention trying to get outside as much as possible. What if you put a pause on gym time and go for walks. You can keep good pace and burn a decent amount of calories.
  • elfin168
    elfin168 Posts: 202 Member
    edited November 2019
    Music babe. Get urself some earplugs and listen to some tunes. I have a gym playlist. I have a real mix to suit my mood. Angry rock music:) and other stuff too also I read on the exercise bike at the gym. That shizzle is tedious dude! Reading passes the time
  • Bex953172
    Bex953172 Posts: 4,162 Member
    I totally agree with the other posters, does sound a bit like depression having had it for years myself! AND also as if you have zero self confidence!!

    Although, i would maybe get checked for thyroid issues too. I'm hypoactive (so my thyroid doesn't produce enough) and if I've not took my medication I feel lethargic, achey, tired (non stop, no matter how much sleep I get) and I lack concentration, I call it a brain fog. And you can't really process anything properly. And .. it can also lead to.. depression.

    But I think what you're doing sounds amazing!! Still hitting the gym despite your struggles! Sounds like you have a real inner strength that youre not even aware of yourself!!

    You can be better, and you will be better! And with just the right support you'll be on your way in no time!!

    I know a lot of people say it (but they say it because it's true) but it won't be this way forever, as long as you take the steps to get a bit of help you might need! (And don't worry if you end up crying on the doctors lol!)

    Hope your feeling better after getting this off your chest!