I do not know what I am doing

tbduarte1

Back again....again.

I do not know what I am doing, I do not know how to do it.

I have not been able to stick to a diet, I have not stuck to exercising, I have not stuck to changing my lifestyle. I have tried, I have convinced myself that I was succeeding. I have always fallen right back to where I was. I do not know how people are successful, it seems unattainable to me.

I am lost.

quiksylver296

Read this.

http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242/a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants/p1

Lietchi

Don't try to overhaul your life in one move, take small steps!
Start by simply logging your food, after a few weeks you can aim at a (reasonable!) calorie deficit while eating the foods you're used to, but in smaller portions. You can gradually add exercise into your routine as well. Later on, you can focus on perhaps changing some of your less healthy eating habits, your macros,...

Building habits takes time, so no need to rush, burnout and then end up giving up. Step by step

girlwithcurls2

Maybe you're making this harder than it needs to be. Is @RelCanonical out there? Was it you who said to make it as easy as possible? I read a wise post today that explained how one person set themselves up for success by making the changes as easy as possible. I am sure I won't explain it well, but as written, it made total sense. It doesn't have to be hard or complicated or rigid or restrictive. You CAN do this. One of the first things you'll need is patience.

Shortgirlrunning

I strongly recommend the podcast We Only Look Thin. So much awesome advice and great perspectives on weight loss.

Their best advice by far is to start where you and make small, slow changes.

Luv2eatSweets

I personally think that using the word diet doesn't help. I've just tried to add a few veggies and fruit into my daily routine. It seemed the first 6 months on MFP wasn't working for me until I made small changes. Using a scale and really loading up on fiber helped me. I reduced some carbs, but never went overboard. (Love carbs yummy) Everyone is different, I'm sure that when you have a bad day just shake it off, there is always tomorrow to start fresh. Best thing is not to beat yourself up. Good luck, we are all rooting for you.

Cinder333

I have been at this for a few months, and I am finally getting the hang of it. It took my awhile to realize that by adding in some healthy food (vegetables with meals,etc) I can eat more volume and feel more satisfied. I am down 4 pounds, which isn’t what I had hoped for but is better than slowly gaining.

What worked for me was finding food that I truly enjoy, but also volumizing. I did a restart this past week after falling off again, but I am starting to change habits. I was actually ready to go back to eating on plan again. I think persistence and trial and error have been key for me.

Also, at this point there are some foods I just can’t keep in the house or I binge on them. I am hoping to eventually reintroduce them.

Good luck, and just keep trying. It honestly gets easier as your habits change.

nwoutdoorgrl

tbduarte1 wrote: »

Back again....again.

I do not know what I am doing, I do not know how to do it.

I have not been able to stick to a diet, I have not stuck to exercising, I have not stuck to changing my lifestyle. I have tried, I have convinced myself that I was succeeding. I have always fallen right back to where I was. I do not know how people are successful, it seems unattainable to me.

I am lost.

I could’ve written this word for word. I’m at a complete loss and really struggling. I see so many people losing weight and I ask myself, “what is wrong with me? Why can’t I do it too?”

I just want you to know that you’re not alone in your thoughts. ❤️

NovusDies

It always seemed unattainable to me too. I was fairly well convinced my genetics were preventing me from losing any significant amount of weight.

However my failures were almost always my own doing. I would try to go too fast. I would try to eat only what I thought was healthy or what I thought was "diet" food. I would jump on the scale expecting immediate and linear results for my efforts. I would think it was okay for me to be unhappy today because I would be happy when I was thinner at some point in the future. I would expect willpower and motivation to keep me going. When inevitably I tripped and my mouth landed on a mountain of food I assumed I had blown and I had to start over.

None of that is correct. It took me a very long time to stop repeating the same failing tactic over and over.

You have to throw out the notion that your goal is to lose weight. Your goal is to engage in a sustainable plan that results in weight loss. Sustainable means you are trying to be happy today eating things you enjoy in moderation while losing weight at a pace you can handle physically and mentally. Sustainable also means it should feel like a mostly normal day. You eat the foods you normally eat just less of them. You change only what absolutely has to be changed in order to create a calorie deficit. Once you have that down you change a little more.

amy19355

nwoutdoorgrl wrote: »

tbduarte1 wrote: »

Back again....again.

I do not know what I am doing, I do not know how to do it.

I have not been able to stick to a diet, I have not stuck to exercising, I have not stuck to changing my lifestyle. I have tried, I have convinced myself that I was succeeding. I have always fallen right back to where I was. I do not know how people are successful, it seems unattainable to me.

I am lost.

I could’ve written this word for word. I’m at a complete loss and really struggling. I see so many people losing weight and I ask myself, “what is wrong with me? Why can’t I do it too?”

I just want you to know that you’re not alone in your thoughts. ❤️

I think what turned me around was to see that once I lost the weight, I didn't know what came after. It's like there needed to be some kind of reward, AND, and end to the dieting.
MFP community forums have really been helpful to me in not losing sight of why I do this.

I don't diet any more; I have eating events, three or four times a day, and I use MFP to mind my calories and track my progress.

IT was, and still is, a daily struggle to remind myself that my goal for losing weight is to reach a healthy place to carry me the rest of my life. (I'm 63).

good luck to us all.

kenyonhaff

tbduarte1 wrote: »

Back again....again.

I do not know what I am doing, I do not know how to do it.

I have not been able to stick to a diet, I have not stuck to exercising, I have not stuck to changing my lifestyle. I have tried, I have convinced myself that I was succeeding. I have always fallen right back to where I was. I do not know how people are successful, it seems unattainable to me.

I am lost.

Great! We are so glad you are here!

The first step is to make your profile. Just do it. Then consider your goals (I always recommend go the moderate weight loss route). And then get yourself a food scale so you can figure out your portions.

On MFP you're going to make mistakes, and that's OK -- it's all part of the learning process. And you might have to un-learn things too. You're going to learn what works for YOU and that's a messy process. It's OK.

jimceez2063

Keep your goal simple. A pound a week is harder than one thinks. Keeping a journal really helps. Without it I slip. All the time.

I would recommend a book called “Younger Next Year”. There’s a version for men and women. It brings together the nutrition, exercise and social aspects of making healthy choices. It woke me up and I thought I would share my experience.

ReenieHJ

Patience. Now there's a hard word to remember when anyone is trying to lose weight. You want it gone. Yesterday. Baby steps belongs with that 'P' word too.
Any path you choose to get where you want to go, requires baby steps and patience. It's taken me my whole life to learn that.
Try to maneuver your mindset around to telling yourself you CAN do this. You WILL do this. Don't even use the word try anymore. It has the negative connotation(to me anyways) that you might not attain your goals, you won't attain your goals. Use positive self talk and don't let that negative inner voice through!! Think of all your personal reasons why I will do this. Then make a plan by changing small things. You feel like eating even if you've just finished a meal? Chew gum, clean out a closet, call a friend. Got leftovers nobody is eating and you really don't want them either? Look out trash, here they come. Or freeze them. Don't let your trigger foods come into the house. Period. Just don't buy them. The ice cream coolers and bakery aisles used to call out my name when grocery shopping, I mean yelled my name so I couldn't hear anything else. Carrots never talked to me and forget celery, we haven't talked in years. Lol. Greens, apples, oranges, lean meats.....nope, it was always the junk foods loaded with sugars and fats. *sigh* Until I felt a bit stronger and just snubbed those aisles. Now it's much easier to do.

This season is challenging because my family all expect me to bake the normal cookies and cookies are a huge downfall for me. Having recently had an extra challenging day of eating reject cookies, I pulled myself up by the bootstraps and got right back to it the next day. And that's a major improvement over what I used to do all my yo-yo years before. I blew 1 day and figured 'what's the sense, I can't do it anyways'.
But keep the negative self talk away and keep telling yourself you CAN and WILL do this.

Think of a couple of the foods you really like and then find a way to work them into your calorie allotment so you don't feel deprived. Search for new healthier foods that you can like too!! My newest is avocado. I also love hummus. Fav breakfast is oatmeal with chopped apples and cinnamon thrown in to cook together. Plain non fat yogurt, never liked it before(had all those flavored fruity sugar filled ones around to eat) but I found out how good it really is now. I don't feel deprived when I eat these things.

You CAN do this!!!

nighthawk584

Until you change your mindset of CAN'T to CAN, it will always be difficult. This is not to down you or anything, just telling you what I had to do for myself. I don't know your age but I am 55 and was at the end of my rope, health wise and obese class II on BMI scale. If anything do it for your health so you don't end up like I did... pre-diabetic, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, etc. As others said, take small steps and don't look past what you are doing each day to better your situation. Tackle the DAY at hand, not the week, month, or year.

Pipsqueak1965

Are you perhaps one of those people who want to lose loads of weight really quickly and go from 0-100 (ie start on a very low calorie intake, only eating 'really healthy' food, saying you'll go to the gym 5 times a week? If yes - you are probably doomed to failure. Eat at a sensible deficit, maybe start a little bit of exercise you can fit in - ie walk instead of driving everywhere, and take it slow.