A word of caution and a Happy New Years from a very old time member

AdamAthletic

Hey all, happy New Years to all.

I last checked my MFP news feed some time ago and the months since my streak was 1400 days are fading further into history.
You see, I used to be the picture of heath - the person giving the advice to be careful and do things in a slow and steady way. I’m a qualified personal trainer with years of experience working within a very niche, demanding aspect of fitness.

What could go wrong?

I was in this community for a long time, I was a moderator for several years and absolutely loved the community. The problem is, I became a victim of my obsession.
I could feel myself being more and more taken aback by having to moderate threads giving advice that I wasn’t following, by having to help keep the forum a safe place for all when my life wasn’t staying on that healthy lane.

I decided that it was for the best for MFP and for my own mental health, to take a step back and try to find help. I’d started to fall into a very unhealthy eating cycle, regularly burning far more calories in a day than I was consuming.

Now, I’ve left the fitness industry altogether and I’ve been getting help for the last 6 months. I still struggle and I’m far from body image happy. But, I’m not in the dark place I was.

I’m not coming back here to preach how you should live the perfect life, I’m just wanting to make a point that even somebody with years of experience in giving health advice to people can fall down a dark hole - anybody can.

Be safe in 2020 and onwards - your long term health is more important than short term goals

And to all the MFP team - you’re awesome, happy New Years. I look back on my years with MFP with fondness and miss all the friends within the community and fellow volunteers and community team that I was alongside.

Be well everybody!
I’m trying to stick around, this time getting my health in a better place.

nutmegoreo

Welcome back!

AdamAthletic

nutmegoreo wrote: »

Welcome back!

Thanks.
There have been so many times that I’ve come close to deleting my account. Just, I’ve always held out until a time that I could bite my pride and come and tell my story.
Not huge but, I guess that I hope I’ll be able to somehow stop others from falling down the same path.

It’s just a very difficult thing to admit that you’re recovering from when you’ve been a member of a community for such a long time.

I probably won’t be particularly active but, I’m gonna try be around every so often!

Nony_Mouse

Welcome back, Adam. As one who has experienced that dark hole in the past, I'm so sorry to hear this happened to you, but thank you for having the courage to post about your experience. I'm glad you're on the road to recovery

AdamAthletic

Nony_Mouse wrote: »

Welcome back, Adam. As one who has experienced that dark hole in the past, I'm so sorry to hear this happened to you, but thank you for having the courage to post about your experience. I'm glad you're on the road to recovery

Thanks Nony, really great to see you’re still around here and hope you’re doing well!

Yeah, it’s been a real struggle coming to terms with it and although fitness will always have a special place in my heart - I have to remind myself to be careful more and more.

Really hope that 2020 has got off to a great start for you!

Nony_Mouse

AdamAthletic wrote: »

Nony_Mouse wrote: »

Welcome back, Adam. As one who has experienced that dark hole in the past, I'm so sorry to hear this happened to you, but thank you for having the courage to post about your experience. I'm glad you're on the road to recovery

Thanks Nony, really great to see you’re still around here and hope you’re doing well!

Yeah, it’s been a real struggle coming to terms with it and although fitness will always have a special place in my heart - I have to remind myself to be careful more and more.

Really hope that 2020 has got off to a great start for you!

I know that struggle. I was downright terrified when I joined MFP five years ago that I would fall back into old habits of restricting more and more. If you ever need a friendly ear, just holler.

I'm at the other end of the spectrum to you currently, though also as a result of not practicing what I preach. Had an ME/CFS relapse starting nearly two years ago, and getting much worse this past year (but much improved from where I was for awhile, with occasional blips when I push things too hard). I know exactly the advice I'd have given others in the same situation, but did I follow it? No. So now I have the fun task of losing quite a substantial amount of weight with a very limited capacity for exercise. Joy! But I'm back on the bandwagon, taking a very sensible conservative approach (necessity, I can do without tanking my meagre energy levels any further!), and will get there, eventually.

AdamAthletic

Nony_Mouse wrote: »

AdamAthletic wrote: »

Nony_Mouse wrote: »

Welcome back, Adam. As one who has experienced that dark hole in the past, I'm so sorry to hear this happened to you, but thank you for having the courage to post about your experience. I'm glad you're on the road to recovery

Thanks Nony, really great to see you’re still around here and hope you’re doing well!

Yeah, it’s been a real struggle coming to terms with it and although fitness will always have a special place in my heart - I have to remind myself to be careful more and more.

Really hope that 2020 has got off to a great start for you!

I know that struggle. I was downright terrified when I joined MFP five years ago that I would fall back into old habits of restricting more and more. If you ever need a friendly ear, just holler.

I'm at the other end of the spectrum to you currently, though also as a result of not practicing what I preach. Had an ME/CFS relapse starting nearly two years ago, and getting much worse this past year (but much improved from where I was for awhile, with occasional blips when I push things too hard). I know exactly the advice I'd have given others in the same situation, but did I follow it? No. So now I have the fun task of losing quite a substantial amount of weight with a very limited capacity for exercise. Joy! But I'm back on the bandwagon, taking a very sensible conservative approach (necessity, I can do without tanking my meagre energy levels any further!), and will get there, eventually.

Sorry to hear about the health struggles!
It must be really frustrating - I have to admit, I’m finding that because of an injury to my knee some time back, that haven’t been able to do nearly as much as I used to.
Probably actually ended up being more of a blessing to me!

As for the weight, none of us are very good at taking the advice that we give - you’ve been here a long time, like myself (this account since 2016 and the one prior, I’m not sure how many years) and in that time, we have lost, gained and everything in between. It might seem hard to believe at any given time but, time heals and any mistakes we make and any paths we find ourselves falling down. Be that with weight gain or with other struggles, they’re backtrackable.

I’m positive you’ll do brilliantly and as with your offer, the same applies - reach out to me any time!

TarryTaffy

Best of luck to both of you, Adam & Nony. It's nice that you've both taken control of issues that weren't to your benefit.

I don't comment at all on people's diaries, rarely on their daily fitness achievements & have turned off all notifications on my own daily records, because I'm slightly annoyed by the kill it/kick it/be a beast comments. We can achieve our goals by being more kind.

Glad both or your are being more gentle with yourselves & I wish you both a great 2020!

AdamAthletic

TarryTaffy wrote: »

Best of luck to both of you, Adam & Nony. It's nice that you've both taken control of issues that weren't to your benefit.

I don't comment at all on people's diaries, rarely on their daily fitness achievements & have turned off all notifications on my own daily records, because I'm slightly annoyed by the kill it/kick it/be a beast comments. We can achieve our goals by being more kind.

Glad both or your are being more gentle with yourselves & I wish you both a great 2020!

Thankyou

Yeah, kindness really is key - I think that the wonderful thing about MFP is, the advice you get here is really only a third of the benefit of being here, the friends you make and the kindness that people have for each other is what really goes such a long way to helping each other to succeed.

As for getting through tough times, I guess it’s just a part of life. I just know that back when I was active here before - I did the right thing in taking a step back and getting my life in order somewhat before doing myself and others any harm by giving and taking bad advice.

All the best to you also. Happy New Years!

nutmegoreo

AdamAthletic wrote: »

nutmegoreo wrote: »

Welcome back!

Thanks.
There have been so many times that I’ve come close to deleting my account. Just, I’ve always held out until a time that I could bite my pride and come and tell my story.
Not huge but, I guess that I hope I’ll be able to somehow stop others from falling down the same path.

It’s just a very difficult thing to admit that you’re recovering from when you’ve been a member of a community for such a long time.

I probably won’t be particularly active but, I’m gonna try be around every so often!

It's great that you have found the confidence to share your difficulties. It can be such a slippery slope. I'm sure others will find your courage to be inspirational, and hopefully, if they are struggling, they will find the strength to reach out for help.

AliNouveau

Welcome back
Life has a way of throwing curveballs at us.
I always try to advise friends here to keep a level head about things. It's so easy to get caught up in this new healthy lifestyle but how healthy is it to obsess about every calorie, every workout.

I've been there, done that. My life was that and I have seen the dark side of that sort of life

So I hope you continue to come out the other side a success. We're never failures. We have injuries and such but they're just challenges. I had shoulder surgery recently and while it set me back, recovery has been a challenge. Life is a challenge. I like to win challenges. . Good luck!!