What puts you off exercising and how do you get passed it?

vampirequeen1959

I know it's human nature to blame someone else for our shortfalls but my fear/dislike of exercising dates back to school when a superfit PE teacher humiliated me in front of 60+ girls. I wasn't the thinnest of teenage girls. I wasn't huge (UK size 14/16) but bigger than all the other girls and I really wasn't very good at PE. I tried but my best was never good enough for this teacher. One day, after a gym session, she loudly exclaimed to me that most people perspire after PE "...but fat pigs like you sweat disgustingly..." Since then I have hated sweating. I see thinner people sweat and don't think anything of it but I can't seem to accept myself in the same way. My husband used to be a PTI and he's tried to help. He told me that when he was training squaddies he used to send them back to do the activity again if they weren't sweating because it showed that they weren't trying hard enough. So sweating when exercising is natural and a sign that you're pushing yourself. He's also set fans up next to our treadmill so that I have cool breezes blowing on my face and body. It's helped a lot but I still find it difficult to do and hate to exercise when he's in the house which is daft because he's so supportive and I actually love the feeling you get when you've been exercising. It's just pushing myself to do it in the first place. Any suggestions would be welcome or maybe I just have to grit my teeth and force myself.

tcunbeliever

Maybe if you want to turn this into a positive, you can find a way to reward yourself for sweating...maybe you get a bath with a favorite bath bomb, but only if you make it 10 whole minutes while sweating??? Or whatever time is appropriate with whatever reward motivates you. I totally understand not wanting to spend your whole life controlled by some asshat you happened to come into contact with when you were a teenager...it's not easy, but you can retrain your brain with behavioral modification.

You can start doing it when no one else is home since that's easier for you now, then once it's not so hard each time, you can start doing it even when your husband is home. You can eventually replace that negative association with a positive one, but it doesn't happen overnight, just keep at it and you can do this!!!

snowflake954

Very simple--take up swimming, then you'll have no sweating problems.

NovusDies

1) Combine the activity with an activity like watching a favorite TV show. Make it a rule that you can't watch it without exercising during.

2) Get up early and get it over with. The longer each day that you face an activity that you may be dreading for some reason the more your discipline will fade. Knowing it is done all day may give you a boost in mood.

3) Gamify it. I use an Apple Watch and after I brush my teeth/shave etc. the very next thing I do is close my exercise ring for the day. I have a very long streak going and continuing the streak is kind of addicting.

I like the swimming suggestion too. The above is for trying to make it work with an existing piece of equipment. Sometimes that turns out to be a bad idea but I don't think you can always know that without really putting an effort into it.

girlwithcurls2

Find something FUN. Even swimming slowly is good for you. I have days when I know I'm not pushing myself my hardest, but then, how much easier would it have been to drive home instead of to the pool? But I didn't. I showed up. Take any successes you get.

I'm not 100% sure, but I don't think sweat or the amount you sweat really has any bearing on how hard you're working. Yes, I sweat more when I'm working hard, but it all depends on the activity. Rowing machine or running leaves me literally dripping. Lifting weights, a damp shirt. You do you. You're the only you this world has. Give us your best you. Inhabit that beautiful YOU that your husband loves and supports. If you read enough posts here about unsupportive partners, you'll realize what a gem you have. It might be time to put the past behind you and embrace the adult you. That vindictive PE teacher is long gone. Don't allow her to have that power over you anymore. Your soft spot is visible. Hers was invisible, but much, much more unattractive.

Hugs.

vampirequeen1959

Thank everyone. I appreciate your advice.

AnnPT77

Couple of thoughts:

One, I can relate. I was picked about 3rd or 4th from last for teams in gym class all through school. (And I could still name the girls who were sometimes picked after me, even though I graduated in 1973. Yes, 1973.) And I definitely had some . . . um . . . un-encouraging gym teachers (some were fine).

Two, sweating is optional. Whaaaaat? No, really. For extra calorie burn, we only need to move more (exercise or daily life activity) than we did formerly. For fitness improvement, we just need to challenge our bodies a bit beyond our current capabilities. That may involve sweating, but it doesn't need to, especially not at first. Walking helps, cycling helps, swimming is good, weight lifting isn't necessarily sweaty, etc. Just challenge yourself a little, keep up that challenging (manageably more intensity/duration/frequency of exercise over time) and you'll gradually get fitter. Do something involving movement that you find fun.

Sometimes people think exercise has to be miserable and exhausting to be helpful. That's not true.

Your husband, as a PTI, was working with people who needed to get super-fit, really fast, for extremely important reasons. That's probably not essential, for you.

Find something you enjoy doing that involves moving more. Make that an on-ramp to becoming a more active person, gradually, over time, in ways you find fun. That'll work.

P.S. That bookish awkward little girl that was me in the school gym now considers herself a li'l ol' lady athlete. Back in my mid-40s, after several decades of mostly-sedentary obesity, and physically depleted from cancer treatment, I decided I need to become more active if I ever wanted to feel adequately strong and energetic ever again. I started with yoga and other gentle exercise, over period of years took a women's weight training class, and eventually joined a rowing team. Now, at age 64, I row 4 days a week in season (some rowing machine in Winter), go to spin classes twice a week, do some strength training in off season, and more.

Who you have been in your past, is not who you need to be forever. You can change, and you don't have to do it in an instant. You may even grow to enjoy the exhilaration of quite-intense exercise; I do, now: It makes me feel so wonderfully alive. But even if you never do, you can be more active and more fit.

Best wishes! :flowerforyou:

Terytha

My PE teacher liked to tell the class that we lost at everything because of me. Because of how bad I was at everything.

I use the dark side of the force. Get sweaty. Remember how it felt to be called names. Get MAD. Then get SWEATIER out of stubborn rebellion. Realize that, even if you get twice as sweaty as that, you're not as gross or disgusting as an adult who can only cope with their own grossness by making children feel bad about themselves. Understand that you can shower and be clean and gorgeous but that person has to live like that, rotting on the inside.

And nobody needs to care about the opinions of garbage.

srianenelson

Hey, so I'm allergic to my own sweat and I break out in horrible hives and even bleeding if I do. I do everything to avoid it! One thing that has helped me a ton is yoga. I do it in my own home everyday with a big box fan on me. I follow a free yoga channel on youtube called Yoga with Adrienne. She's amazing. I very rarely break a sweat, yet the workout always does an awesome job getting my heart rate up. It's great for losing calories, full body muscle toning AND teaches you so much about loving yourself and your body as you go. I can't suggest it enough.

vampirequeen1959

Thanks everyone. I used to think that PE teachers were a different species as most seemed to be sadists. I think/hope things have changed these days. My stepson (11) told me that they are split into ability sets in PE at his school and the intensity of the activities are linked to the ability of the child. Assessment is all about improving on your previous best not trying to keep up with the really fit.

I'll have a look at Yoga with Adrienne. It had crossed my mind that yoga might be one road to explore but didn't know how to tell which was a good/not so good site. Thanks for the recommendation.