Do you have fears about losing weight?

SarahMWong15

This sounds silly since so many of us here are aiming to lose weight, but I personally, have some fears that may sound a bit silly to some, but are still relevant to me.

I see people who have lost a lot of weight, like 75+ pounds and their faces just look so dead. They look lifeless and I'm ASSUMING maybe they haven't done it in a proper way and are lacking in nutrient and or energy? I don't wanna look dead.

I'm also afraid of my head looking too big on a smaller body. I think I have a larger head, and I've seen people, again, who have lost weight, and their heads just look so massive compared to their smaller frames! I'm so worried I'm gonna look like a bobble head!

I also fear the dreaded same size arms. I have fat arms, and I'm afraid that I won't be able to lose the weight there and I'm just gonna have fat arms and a smaller body.

mph323

Keep in mind you will have the opportunity to reassess your goals and take stock of how you look and feel at every step along the way. You won't suddenly wake up one morning with dead eyes, a giant head and out of proportion arms

Take it a pound at a time, and realize that you are in control of your journey, and you can stop at any time if you feel the results you are getting are not what you expected or are comfortable with. Stop imagining the worst possible future and focus on where you are today!

jenilla1

Do it slowly and gradually and you can stop well before you get to the bobblehead stage! You can do this! Stay positive.

AnnPT77

I'd also suggest heading over to the "Success Stories" part of the forums, and looking at a bunch of before and after photos of actual real people who've lost weight here. Frequent comments I see there, on other people's photos, are "you could be that before picture's son/daughter" or "you look so much younger". That doesn't really sound like dead or lifeless!

Certainly, it's a help to good results if you avoid losing weight super fast (and taking it gradually also may help you to experiment and dial in good, sustainable habits that will help you stay at a healthy weight long term). Other good ideas for best appearance are good, balanced overall nutrition, adequate hydration, and regular exercise (strength and cardio). That may sound like a lot, but you can gradually dial in different parts of a healthy formula over a period of time, alongside sensible weight loss, so you arrive at your goal line looking your best.

It's kind of normal to look a little bit worse, only temporarily, part way to goal, but better at goal and then be improving for some time beyond first getting there, too. For example, skin shrinkage can lag a little bit behind fat loss: It's a process. Losing weight is a physical stress. Keeping that stress at a moderate level is part of a good outcome, but more improvement can happen after that from being at maintenance calories for a while.

The long term results will be good, if you approach it in a healthy way (no crazy fad diets, just good nutrition, etc.). And it feels great! Or at least that's my perspective in year 4+ of maintenance, after literally several decades of obesity.

thenewkayla

My only fear is losse skin😞.
My goal weight is 140 which ive been before and my head looked just fine😂.
I'm 225lb now. Im over it and I'll tackle the losse skin when I come to it

harper16

That no matter how much weight I lose I'll still see a fat person in the mirror. I've lost a lot of weight before (down to an unhealthy weight), and what I saw in the mirror was always the same fat girl. I guess that's my fear.

cupcakesandproteinshakes

I think those dead looking gaunt people may have lost weight too quickly. So lose slowly. There’s a thread about people’s faces filling back out in maintenance which may be helpful for you.

Also I would seriously consider getting into regular resistance training on a structured programme. Having a bit of muscle will really help your body look ‘tighter’ as you lose.

lgfrie

I think part of it is self-perception vs how you look to others. When I got to 60 lbs lost I took some after pics to go with my before pics, and I thought that I looked gaunt, with fleshy neck skin that I'd never noticed before LOL I put up the before/after pics on a Reddit IF board and got a lot of comments. Nobody commented on what seemed to me to be the obvious increase in fleshiness. All I got were compliments on looking 10 or 15 years younger and much healthier. I got to thinking that maybe I had formed a durable self-image as an obese person that made it hard for me to see myself in a new light, even though other people picked up on the changes in a very positive way.

glassyo

mph323 wrote: »

Keep in mind you will have the opportunity to reassess your goals and take stock of how you look and feel at every step along the way. You won't suddenly wake up one morning with dead eyes, a giant head and out of proportion arms

Take it a pound at a time, and realize that you are in control of your journey, and you can stop at any time if you feel the results you are getting are not what you expected or are comfortable with. Stop imagining the worst possible future and focus on where you are today!

I'm pretty sure the bolded is the funniest thing I've ever read on here.

I don't think I had any conscious fears when losing weight but maybe in the back of my mind was worrying it wouldn't change anything. I'd still be the same person I was...just in a smaller size. You know like self esteem and self worth wise. And making really bad choices in men wise.

PAV8888

I have to chuckle (a little) at the OP.

One of the first things I noticed after my more rapid weight loss phase (18 months at just under 1.5lbs a week on average) was that it took a good part of the next year till I stopped seeing my previous face and started actually seeing my then current face. And started believing that my second leg would fit in my pants without double checking. And that people would fit with me in the doorway when the pushy *kittens* would try to pass by without waiting for me to finish coming through first. Should I mention the annoying waiters that expected me to squeeze through the small corridors between the tables? Or the idiots who tried to run me out of the small sidewalk and into the street? Yeah... seems they were spatially aware and I was NOT!

When I did stop seeing my former face and body (add another year), I continued on to the OMG my head is sooooo large phase which you just described!

You know what's funny though? Do you often go around thinking that kids have disproportionately large heads for their bodies? I mean seriously. How often does that happen to you?

Because my kid pictures and a life sized charcoal portrait by a family friend that I found when going through some boxes all seem to have me sporting a head that is proportionately extremely similar to my current one!

And let's face it: if I am big headed at least I am a healthier big head!

4+ years post that "rapid" phase... I think my head is perfectly OK

threewins

I don't wanna look dead as well. So I need to lose weight.

nighthawk584

I'd rather be a "bobble" head than a DEAD head!

kshama2001

That's your Inner Saboteur talking. Learn to recognize that voice and shut it down

We also get threads from people worried about loose skin when they get to goal weight - often from younger people for whom this won't actually be an issue, but regardless, loose skin is definitely healthier than considerable excess weight.

I thought this was going to be a thread about having gained weight as an armor and fear of losing that protective coating, which has indeed been an issue for me.

NovusDies

In general the bigger the scope of the decision the less emotion should play a role. That is easier said than done. However, rationally the decision to lose weight can be viewed by utility value. This is essentially making a list of pros and cons but scoring them. A pro would be statistically improved health and longevity. A con would be that weight loss can happen unevenly. Those two things do not have the same utility value. It should take a mighty long list of cons to overcome just that one thing and it is not the only pro.

I have lost over 200 pounds. The process has had some pretty ugly moments. I am not thrilled with my current appearance and it will take a surgery to resolve some of it. Some of it may be better in a couple of years. Some of it will be my new life going forward. What I have gained far exceeds all of it. I am in much better health. I feel more vibrant. My mood is consistently better. I am capable of doing so much more.

Depending on how much you need to lose, your weight distribution, age, and height you may not feel your weight currently disables you in any way. It may not. It may in ways that are part of your normal now that you don't realize. I definitely felt how it disabled me but even I did not fully appreciate how much until now when most of it is gone.