The benefit of losing Facebook?

ultraastra

I’ve just completed week 3
And I’m 8lbs down

I’ve successfully done significant weight loss twice before on MFP, but it’s taken me months to get back into it this time.

So what was the difference of the last 3 weeks? I lost access to Facebook! So every time I habitually looked to my phone where did I go? I logged my food!

I would like to build up a network on here if possible which will keep me coming back

Anyone?

csplatt

I have gone back and forth with deactivating my Facebook account, and at this point I'm seeing that I'm a better person without it. I still like Instagram, but I don't waste as much time, don't have so many other people's lives and opinions shoved in my face all day.

MaintainInTheMembrane

I got rid of Facebook last year. I deleted my account and messenger. Best thing I ever did.

Madwife2009

Facebook is an awful thing. I never had an account as there are some people that I don't wish to see/talk to/hear from and one of them would have found me (being as she persuaded my mother to give her my address so she could write to me, even though my mother had promised me that she wouldn't give my address to anyone). My now-adult daughter virtually lives on Facebook and some of her "real life friends" used it as a way to disengage with her when she went to university. But they didn't stop at blocking/un-friending her (or whatever the term is) they launched a full-on attack as to why they were not going to be friends with her anymore, detailing every minor issue/upset from their years of "friendship". It was nasty; very, very nasty. Having seen that, I am not at all surprised that the younger generation have issues. I don't remember experiencing this when I was young - is this a younger generation thing, this need to totally destroy another person's character/confidence? Does it make them feel powerful or controlling, or something?

Facebook is toxic, it really is.

tinkerbellang83

Madwife2009 wrote: »

Facebook is an awful thing. I never had an account as there are some people that I don't wish to see/talk to/hear from and one of them would have found me (being as she persuaded my mother to give her my address so she could write to me, even though my mother had promised me that she wouldn't give my address to anyone). My now-adult daughter virtually lives on Facebook and some of her "real life friends" used it as a way to disengage with her when she went to university. But they didn't stop at blocking/un-friending her (or whatever the term is) they launched a full-on attack as to why they were not going to be friends with her anymore, detailing every minor issue/upset from their years of "friendship". It was nasty; very, very nasty. Having seen that, I am not at all surprised that the younger generation have issues. I don't remember experiencing this when I was young - is this a younger generation thing, this need to totally destroy another person's character/confidence? Does it make them feel powerful or controlling, or something?

Facebook is toxic, it really is.

I think people using it can be toxic, I don't think the site/app itself is. I worked overseas for most of my adult life and it's one of the few ways I could keep in touch with former colleagues/family/friends and share what I am doing with them.

Like most things, these can be abused. I certainly recall plenty of people at school being happy to destroy other kid's character/confidence in the late 80's / early 90's before the internet was hugely popular and it wouldn't have had the same reach as the likes of Facebook. Graffiti in toilets, fake rumours, violence & other forms of bullying have all gone on for decades and beyond, so I don't think we can lead all the blame to Social Media.

As to your questions does it make them feel powerful? Of course it does - bullies are usually the weakest people and it says more about them than it does their victim.

I think we should try and remember as well Social Media does also have it's benefits, people who have been reunited with lost items/pets; increased visibility for charities and community causes, the ability to keep people connected to friends and family no matter where in the world they are, a wider audience for small businesses, grassroots sports clubs, etc and a good way to find information when you move to a new area.

I can give you several positive examples just from this week alone:

• When I worked overseas I worked for a not for profit organisation that works alongside the UK Military, it's an organisation that has been around for decades, there is a group on Facebook that allows people who worked for them to keep in touch and reach out for help if needed. Last week, we were made aware that one of our former colleagues (not someone that I've worked with myself, but others had) had bad run of life recently, she had been diagnosed with a chronic illness and some months later with breast cancer, she is currently unable to work and her teenage son is trying to care for her. Another colleague (with this ladies consent) set up a gofundme page to try and raise some funds to help them through what is a hugely challenging times, within hours a few hundred had been raised, we are all scattered across the globe and without Facebook would not have known about her struggles.
• A local dog charity had been struggling to cope with the numbers of dogs they were holding, through a Facebook post, they've managed to gain more volunteers and people interested in re-homing the dogs.
• My Aunt lives in Cyprus and is a keen amateur photographer, Facebook is a good method for me to see her fabulous photos and keep in touch with her.

I keep my Facebook private, I add only people I know and care to stay in touch with, at the first sign of any content that I find offensive/toxic, I remove a person.

I don't care how many likes a photo gets, I just like to share pictures of my travels with my friends and family so they can stay up-to-date with what I am up to, as I rarely get to travel to my home country.

Chef_Barbell

I'm glad I got rid of FB almost 9 years ago. Don't miss it and never looked back.

katsheare

@ultraastra Congrats on week 3 and your success so far! That is no mean feat.

For me, being successful in my physical goals (not just weight loss, but also strength and stamina building) has absolutely hinged on finding a group (or two...) of supportive people here in the MFP community. Look through the Challenges (https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/categories/challenges) if you haven't already; there are some that are very competitive, some that are less intensive (weekly check-ins, etc), and a fair few that will be themed. Opting into something like that gives you a running chance of finding like-minded individuals here, a much more curated approach than FB has...

I'm with @tinkerbellang83 about the 'book; my family and many of my friends are at least 5 time zones away from me, and it gives me a chance to dip in and out and keep up-ish to date. I don't take it personally when I don't know what's going on because 'it was on Facebook' and they've learned that if they actually need me a personal message needs to be sent. I've never been in with the in-crowd anyway. Except maybe here

AlexandraFindsHerself1971

Facebook, like television, makes me unhappy with who I am and where I am, and it's hard for me because I keep my religion and orientation closeted around my family of origin. I am not going to do the work to do two accounts, or manage who can see what and constantly have to second-guess myself so that my cousin doesn't see that I retweeted something about LGBT pride. It's easier to let my mom tell me what is going on in the family, and to stay off Facebook.

LivingtheLeanDream

Yeah I stopped checking out FB before Christmas, downloaded a language learning app so my spare time is spent now learning Italian. A much better way to spend my time.
6 weeks in I now have learned over 500 Italian words and am grasping the lingo nicely

RelCanonical

Staying off of most social media has helped. I'm still on here and on some reddit communities, and I talk to my mom on facebook, but I try to stay out of the general feeds as much as possible. I have lost friends because of it, but they were not so close that it was painful.

FreedomSand

I managed 21 days without FB last July - Aug. Life was so good!

Unfortunately I find I do need it for the groups I am in. I volunteer with cat and dog rescue, and have many contacts on FB through groups, with no other way to communicate to those folks. I also have one of my dogs in Agility and found an Agility group that is awesome and a great help to me.

I used to enjoy online forums, they were free, you could connect with folks on one specific topic and share info. Back then photobucket let you upload photos to the forums for free.

Once FB came along, and at the same time photobucket started charging folks, that was end of many forums. But FB is NOT the same, as you get people's lives and opinions 'shoved in your face,' as @csplatt stated.

Now I try to limit my time on FB, and stick to the groups rather than the newsfeed. That helps some. I wish I could completely do away with it, but it is so integrated into the rescue community.

@LivingtheLeanDream I would love to know which program you are using for learning Italian language.

13bbird13

I'm awful at Facebook. I've tried twice and failed to keep up... and I only have 14 friends! I only accepted requests from people I actually want to stay in touch with, but I still feel overwhelmed, as if I'll offend someone if I miss "liking" one of their photos. I haven't been on since May 2018, and I have photos from three really nice vacations to share, but I don't know if I'll ever go back.

dbanks80

I deactivate my account to take a break from time to time. I use it to keep in touch with my family. I do tend to compulsive shop when the advertisements to my favorite stores scroll across (not a good thing). But typically Facebook is a total waste of time.

gothchiq

I ditched Facebook like a year ago and never looked back. It's turned into a wretched hive of scum and villainy. Sell your data, sell you political strife... Nah bro I'm out!

rachelr1116

I took a break from Facebook this month and felt so much more productive! It would be nice to ditch it completely but I need it to keep in touch with a volunteer group and I do like searching the events for things to do with my friends and family. I did delete the app from my phone so now it isn't so easy to just tap a button and spend too long browsing.

Ghostofachance

I take a sabbatical from Facebook during Lent each year (less for religious reasons than for mental health ones). I find I don't miss it that much while I'm gone but slowly get sucked back in after a few weeks. Honestly, if it weren't for pictures of friends/family's kids and pets, I'd probably have left long ago.

amusedmonkey

I'm what you would call a "social loner". I enjoy the company of people but I don't feel that pull to constantly engage (which creates its own problems because I have to actively work on my social life to have one). This has led to me having a very casual relationship with social media. I log in maybe once or twice a month for a few minutes, might catch up on the latest happenings or scroll through some groups and then I'm done for a while and even forget Facebook exists.

For someone like me, there are no benefits to losing Facebook. It plays such a trivial role in my life, so I don't always "get it" when people hate on it. I can only imagine. One thing I do understand, though. Goals are easier to achieve when you change things to require less willpower - now that you don't have Facebook you don't have to force yourself to log your food, it just happens. Congratulations on your weight loss so far and welcome! We have (calorie free) cookies!

NewLIFEstyle4ME

I've always called it "FAKEbook", because the letter C can sometimes sound like a K...

dbanks80

NewLIFEstyle4ME wrote: »

I've always called it "FAKEbook", because the letter C can sometimes sound like a K...

My sister always say you can be whoever you want to be on Fakebook! LOL!

hesn92

I deactivated my fb around thanksgiving this year. I find myself getting addicted to it and just mindlessly scroll... I also check it compulsively your see if there are any notifications. I’ve been meaning to ho back to it because there are some groups that were useful for me and added value to my life, and I do like to keep in touch with some people, but I’ve been too scared to reactivate it. I still have Instagram. But I don’t really instagram right haha I have like 10 followers.

GummiMundi

I have had a Facebook account for 11 years and it has never messed with my life or had such a negative impact as some of the posters on this thread have mentioned. I do check it daily. I use it mostly to stay in touch with people I know, receive updates from local businesses, events, and so on. There isn't much "drama" on my feed - but I guess that depends only on the people I have added as friends.

Sand_TIger

I won't have a Facebook account - and will only use social media that has a specific purpose. The issues with Facebook are really too numerous for me to go into here.

aries68mc

OP, congrats.

As for Facebook, it is only toxic if you allow it to be. It's different for different people. They have different reasons for using it, or not using it. It got started on it as a way to be informed on a class reunion and planning, as a group for our class was set up. It is still a way to keep up with reunion news and connect with former classmates, even if I didn't have much to do with them in school...lol. I am friends with some of them as well as family and people I have "known" for years from other online forums and bulletin boards that are now defunct. It is a great place for sharing of family pics and videos. I don't accept friend requests from people I don't know, or know who they are.

ultraastra

I could talk about the good and bad about Facebook tbh
The point I was making was that losing Facebook removed a major distraction for me. Now when I habitually look at my phone, its at MFP, and its made a huge difference

ChrissyChickie

I was just curious if anyone else here left Facebook and see that I'm not alone. I left about a month ago and found I'm much happier and less stressed now. I do miss some of the for sale groups and a couple others.... but, overall much better now without it. I found that you can deactivate your fb account and still keep the messenger app on your phone if you want. I do this so I can still visually chat with people.

katieannebrown

I deactivated my Facebook account several years ago and I’m so happy that I did. I realized that spending time in my day reading/thinking about other people’s lives wasn’t how I wanted to spend my time. I wanted to use all of my day to be in the moment of my life. I still keep in contact with people, but in a more personal way. I definitely get push back and comments from people about it, but I think that’s more a reflection of their own inner struggle.

HeidiCooksSupper

You can control how you use Facebook just like anything else. I use it to keep up with crafters in my special realms of interest (pin loom weaving and loom knitting). I hide anyone who puts up too much political junk because I don't care to see that much of it. It helps me keep some track of family activities by what little they post. Just hide what you don't like and don't give anything on Facebook more weight than it deserves. Same with Twitter and anything of the like.

Dctorlynn1

I don't live near family. It's my way of keeping in touch.

digestibleplastic

I have deactivated Facebook and I find that I put more effort into keeping in contact with the people who matter in my life. The people who care about me still call, text, send emails and letters and packages for special occasions. In my opinion I have better, more thoughtful, fuller relationships now. Facebook created a lot of relationship facades.

On another note, I stopped watching TV and reading news websites too and I am mentally healthier for it and have more time to focus on myself, my relationships, my hobbies, my well-being and weight loss goals.

lauragreenbaum

I deactivated my FB account almost 3 years ago. I got to sick of the political crap and disturbing videos. Best thing I ever did. I don't miss it one bit.

reneunsinger1963

I would give up Facebook too, if I didn't have Facebook I wouldn't have found out that two of my uncles and my sister had died. My niece notified me through Facebook messenger and my cousins notified me through Facebook app. Facebook seems to be the only way I can keep in contact with some of my family members.