Ruts Sucks

pdelozier76

I’m totally in a rut. Gained weight back. This makes me snore and this wakes myself up all throughout the night and I sleep terribly. I eat way too much and crappy food to make myself feel better. This causes me to have zero will power. To help save money I eat at work since it’s free to me, but the food is not health at all, but we do have a salad bar. Since I feel like crap all the time the salad bar never looks appealing, so I guest eat something greasy instead.

I work 10 hours a day. My commute is 1.5 hours each way. I try to get 8 hours of sleep. This leaves me 2.5 hours each week day to do house chores, eat dinner, visit with my young kids and hang out with my wife.

I feel Like this stacks progress against me. I’ve been doing this routine for 10 years.

janejellyroll

What's one thing you could change to treat yourself better?

When I think of making a bunch of changes, it makes me feel trapped and exhausted. But I have good luck making one change at a time, giving myself plenty of time to learn how to do it well, and then adding another change.

Here are some of the changes I made early in my weight loss: taking a short walk every day on my lunch break, making sure I ate some fresh vegetables each day, logging everything I ate (even if I knew I was missing my calorie goal).

We all have some challenges when it comes to weight loss. It sounds like you've already identified some of yours, which -- in a way -- gives you a leg up in trying to think of adjustments you can make to work with them.

sammidelvecchio

Jane, that is an amazing suggestion. I am also in a rut, and I have been so hard on myself about all the things i've gotten off track with. But thank you, I am going to do this and pick just one thing to focus on over the next week.

OP - try to keep your head up. This process can be so trying at times!

janejellyroll

sammidelvecchio wrote: »

Jane, that is an amazing suggestion. I am also in a rut, and I have been so hard on myself about all the things i've gotten off track with. But thank you, I am going to do this and pick just one thing to focus on over the next week.

OP - try to keep your head up. This process can be so trying at times!

I'm glad it resonated. I think we all have those times when we're struggling to find our spark and it can be hard to remember to treat ourselves well. Best wishes!

oceangirl99

Work-life balance is important. Can you talk to your employer about working from home once per week? I have a desk job and can usually fit in a 30 minute run on my lunch break (yup I'm sweaty when I get back) and I eat at my desk.

pdelozier76

oceangirl99 wrote: »

Work-life balance is important. Can you talk to your employer about working from home once per week? I have a desk job and can usually fit in a 30 minute run on my lunch break (yup I'm sweaty when I get back) and I eat at my desk.

Working from home isn’t possible with my job. Thanks.

JBanx256

"The only difference between a rut & a grave is the depth."

Can you genuinely not afford to bring food to work, or do you simply choose not to do so because the food there is free for you? If you can afford to do so, bring your own food to work, even if not every day, at least some days. Or bring something to add to the salad to make it more appealing/more complete, eg, a packet of tuna or a couple sliced hardboiled eggs.

On the days you DO eat the food offered there, either A. get the greasy crap but cut the portion down significantly, B. get the protein from the greasy meal, discard the rest, and pile the protein on top of the salad, or C. suck it up buttercup* and get the salad even if it's not what's appealing at that moment.

Do you snack during the workday? If so, are you eating more junk, or are you snacking on raw veggies, fruit, a protein bar/shake, etc? Do you drink regular soda or do you go for zero-cal options like water (plain or flavored), diet soda, etc?

Can you take 30-45 minutes each evening and take a stroll with the wife & kiddo? What do you eat when you're at home; can you adjust your breakfast/dinner (for weeknights, and all 3 meals on the weekends) menus to be lower calorie to help you out on that front?

FWIW, I work 12 hour shifts with a 1-hour commute each way. I also have a young child & husband waiting for me at home. I MAKE it work. It's a matter of priorities.

IMO, nothing is "stacked against you." You're taking a defeatist attitude & blaming your situation on external forces, rather than giving yourself the power to make choices that will enable you to earn the results you want. You KNOW you will feel better if you eat better; you KNOW if you eat better you'll lose weight; you KNOW if you lose weight you'll sleep better...you know how to fix this problem.



*not intending that to belittle, just sometimes you gotta do the things you don't want to do.

ReenieHJ

Sometimes we look at our situations and feel we cannot change anything about them or it'd be an awful lot of work. I bet you could find a thing or two to change and make your present health a bit better. Look at the foods you're eating and choose healthier ones; as was suggested maybe bring something from home instead of eating the greasy junk they offer. An apple and a banana, some yogurt or cheese, turkey breast and whole wheat bread sandwich, might be options as opposed to the junk so try packing your own lunch some of the time and see how it goes.

Looking at the whole picture can feel so overwhelming. Take it one change at a time, one improvement at a time. Do you track calories on MFP at all? That's been such an eye-opener to me, seeing how many calories different foods have.
Life is all about choices. It's ultimately up to each one of us to change our situation. Good luck!!!

wmweeza

2.5 hours EACH WEEKDAY. Take an hour each day on the weekends and meal prep.
This is your one life, make it what you want out of it. Yes you work long hours and you just want a few minutes to yourself, but success is planned, it doesn't just happen.
And life is stacked against you? I'm half deaf and use a wheelchair due to CP. I've also developed arthritis in my spine and hip. I have no help, no chef, nothing but I've lost 93 pounds making my own meals. No magical personal trainer fairy showed up at my house and granted me abs, I'm earning them slowly on my own.
Yes, it very much sucks to have your schedule, but for now I'm sorry to say you have 2 choices, keep going exactly how you are and have nothing change, or take a bit of time on the weekend and prepare for success.
You've been doing this for 10 years? Isn't the definition of insanity doing the same thing again and again yet expecting the same result? I know it may not be possible at the moment, but in the future either your commute or your job may need to change so you can live longer.
You can do this, you really can! You deserve to live a long and happy life

PAV8888

wmweeza wrote: »

I know it may not be possible at the moment, but in the future either your commute or your job may need to change so you can live longer.

Or you can make changes AT work. And at home. In spite of them remaining the same.

You can get up and walk around 3 minutes every hour of your 10 hours. Bathroom on another floor? Visit a colleague at a different location? Tell people your back is hurting a bit and you need to stretch so that you can work harder when you get back to your desk. This doesn't come out of your current me time.

You could add a 15 minute walk during lunch time. You could compensate by eating at your desk.

If the greasy food is served in a dinner plate, you can hand the server a salad plate for them to fill for you instead. And a plate of salad ingredients and toppings you select.

Eating salads is not an automatic "low calorie" option, by the way. It could be if it is individual items that you put together. But if the salads are prepared with dressing already included or have high calorie toppings it is not clear cut that the salad option would be "better". I really don't see the need to bring food; but, it certainly would be an option too and then you can totally skip the "eating room".

People have already asked about snacks and drinks. Is the issue truly the food at work, or is the issue the food at work plus at home plus snacks in the meanwhile? You could change snacks to apples! Actually this might be a marginal caloric change, but it could quite possibly change your satiety level! And make you feel better.

Then you (and your family I supposed) may have to decide that some things are a priority. You can either go to work 15 minutes early and go for a walk on arrival, or have a 15 minute walk before leaving. Same on the way back home.

We've now added 45 minutes of walking a day. Not including weekends where there exists no restriction. Plus another 30 minutes in 3 minute increments during the day. We've just moved you from being sedentary to being somewhere closer to between lightly active and active. With benefits of its own for your health over and above and separately from weight control.

I mean, as people have indicated, you can do nothing. Or you can slowly work into what you've got.

Will you have to make changes? Well, duh, yeah, I would say you probably will have to make some. But they don't have to all be made at once!

RoseyandReady

Could you make a career change? Drastic, yes, but the time you spend driving must be awful. The gas and insurance costs would be a bummer too, but if you worked closer to home it would help.

Play your favourite song when you are getting down - it might give a little boost even if it's only for 3 mins.

cupcakesandproteinshakes

PAV8888 wrote: »

wmweeza wrote: »

I know it may not be possible at the moment, but in the future either your commute or your job may need to change so you can live longer.

Or you can make changes AT work. And at home. In spite of them remaining the same.

You can get up and walk around 3 minutes every hour of your 10 hours. Bathroom on another floor? Visit a colleague at a different location? Tell people your back is hurting a bit and you need to stretch so that you can work harder when you get back to your desk. This doesn't come out of your current me time.

You could add a 15 minute walk during lunch time. You could compensate by eating at your desk.

If the greasy food is served in a dinner plate, you can hand the server a salad plate for them to fill for you instead. And a plate of salad ingredients and toppings you select.

Eating salads is not an automatic "low calorie" option, by the way. It could be if it is individual items that you put together. But if the salads are prepared with dressing already included or have high calorie toppings it is not clear cut that the salad option would be "better". I really don't see the need to bring food; but, it certainly would be an option too and then you can totally skip the "eating room".

People have already asked about snacks and drinks. Is the issue truly the food at work, or is the issue the food at work plus at home plus snacks in the meanwhile? You could change snacks to apples! Actually this might be a marginal caloric change, but it could quite possibly change your satiety level! And make you feel better.

Then you (and your family I supposed) may have to decide that some things are a priority. You can either go to work 15 minutes early and go for a walk on arrival, or have a 15 minute walk before leaving. Same on the way back home.

We've now added 45 minutes of walking a day. Not including weekends where there exists no restriction. Plus another 30 minutes in 3 minute increments during the day. We've just moved you from being sedentary to being somewhere closer to between lightly active and active. With benefits of its own for your health over and above and separately from weight control.

I mean, as people have indicated, you can do nothing. Or you can slowly work into what you've got.

Will you have to make changes? Well, duh, yeah, I would say you probably will have to make some. But they don't have to all be made at once!

Very good post on how incremental behavioural changes can make a real difference.

pdelozier76

PAV8888 wrote: »

wmweeza wrote: »

I know it may not be possible at the moment, but in the future either your commute or your job may need to change so you can live longer.

Or you can make changes AT work. And at home. In spite of them remaining the same.

You can get up and walk around 3 minutes every hour of your 10 hours. Bathroom on another floor? Visit a colleague at a different location? Tell people your back is hurting a bit and you need to stretch so that you can work harder when you get back to your desk. This doesn't come out of your current me time.

You could add a 15 minute walk during lunch time. You could compensate by eating at your desk.

If the greasy food is served in a dinner plate, you can hand the server a salad plate for them to fill for you instead. And a plate of salad ingredients and toppings you select.

Eating salads is not an automatic "low calorie" option, by the way. It could be if it is individual items that you put together. But if the salads are prepared with dressing already included or have high calorie toppings it is not clear cut that the salad option would be "better". I really don't see the need to bring food; but, it certainly would be an option too and then you can totally skip the "eating room".

People have already asked about snacks and drinks. Is the issue truly the food at work, or is the issue the food at work plus at home plus snacks in the meanwhile? You could change snacks to apples! Actually this might be a marginal caloric change, but it could quite possibly change your satiety level! And make you feel better.

Then you (and your family I supposed) may have to decide that some things are a priority. You can either go to work 15 minutes early and go for a walk on arrival, or have a 15 minute walk before leaving. Same on the way back home.

We've now added 45 minutes of walking a day. Not including weekends where there exists no restriction. Plus another 30 minutes in 3 minute increments during the day. We've just moved you from being sedentary to being somewhere closer to between lightly active and active. With benefits of its own for your health over and above and separately from weight control.

I mean, as people have indicated, you can do nothing. Or you can slowly work into what you've got.

Will you have to make changes? Well, duh, yeah, I would say you probably will have to make some. But they don't have to all be made at once!

Thank you for this.

What’s sad is I’m on my feet for the majority of my day at work.

PAV8888

I used to consider a two McDouble meal and large fries and regular Pop a normal meal. In fact without moving to quarter pounders it was a lighter meal.

I've had that for early lunch and then went for all you can eat fish and chips with free all you can drink pop for dinner.

I've had a McDouble and I've had fries this year. I've even had all you can eat fish and chips.

Not on the same day.
Not all the time and every day.

I also now mass approximately 55% of my maximum. And have done so for 3+ years.

If you're on your feet all day you're not sedentary.

Even if you don't control what you eat you do control how much of it you eat.

And nobody is stopping you from bringing some raw or steamedbveggies or some tomatoes in a container are they?

Are you currently gaining weight or are you currently weight stable?

In either case start by cutting no more than 500 calories a day.

How can you tell what a small initial calorie cut will be?

Well that's "simple". Before you eat anything you record it on your phone. Before. Using accurate entries!

just taking the time to record that will probably result in a deficit when you first start and see in black and white what you're consuming. And, if, every time before eating you consider whether you really want to eat what's in front of you because you're hungry or for some other reason!

Yes you do need to second-guess yourself and then ask yourself questions.

We can agree, I think, that if you're eating for reasons other than being hungry then your weight is going to eventually reflect that.

So here's your first challenge. Write it down before you eat it. Ask yourself why you're eating it and whether you're hungry for it right there and then or you can set it aside to eat later.