Weight loss burn out

JK1542020
JK1542020 Posts: 73 Member
edited December 25 in Health and Weight Loss
What do you do to help yourself on days when you feel really low? I kind of feel like I have burn out but honestly I've only been trying to lose weight for a couple of months!

I think it's not helped by the fact I have to eat a strict and restrictive diet due to certain health conditions. (Yes they're real, serious and diagnosed by doctors having been tested) So I cant just eat whatever and fit it into my calories, I can only eat certain things if I dont want to get ill and it's honestly quite depressing.

I mean I feel much better physically but mentally I crave a bit of freedom and actually never enjoy my food. Like I miss looking forward to my dinner. I used to love to cook, and really relish the hour in the kitchen by myself rustling up dinner. Noe it's a total chore and half the time I'm only eating dinner because I know I should, I dont really want what I've cooked. I just feel sad I've had that passion taken away.

Obviously im glad im losing weight. I just miss nice food.

I've just started feeling quite miserable about it all.

Replies

  • sijomial
    sijomial Posts: 19,809 Member
    Don't make the process so hard and so unrelentingly unpleasant that you give up.
    Take a pause, maintain for a while. Consolidate that two months of progress and don't risk it by trying to white knuckle your way through.

    Maintaining now is valuable practice for your future, it's a positive thing and not a sign of failure. Think of it like a project if you will. You plan, you commit but you also review progress along the way to learn lessons that might mean the plan should be tweaked and improved.

    I failed to lose weight for 20 years because I thought dieting had to be constant restriction and steady progress to be successful.
  • Mithridites
    Mithridites Posts: 600 Member
    I agree with the posters above: take a maintenance break. I will just add that sometimes a strict diet can rob us of micronutrients and vitamins that maintain our emotional health. Check with your doctor if supplementing vitamin D, omega3, and magnesium would benefit you. On another note, see if you can find joy in other ways than cooking. Maybe yoga is something you always felt you couldn't do, but now you'd give yourself permission. Maybe there's crafts you've always wanted to try, or a foreign language you would feel good about learning, or maybe an instrument you would like to play. Sometimes we can make great progress in our personal growth precisely when we hit a low point and reevaluate what gives us joy. I wish you happy exploring of the many ways you can experience the good things in life.
  • netitheyeti
    netitheyeti Posts: 539 Member
    I also agree with others, I'd take a break.
    In fact I just spent the past 3 months maintaining because I was also feeling kinda tired (I'm technically normal weight but about 10lbs away from goal). I've been increasing my activity level and enjoying the bigger calorie allowance, and I'm now trying to slowly dip back into a deficit.

    I've never been on a serious long term restrictive diet apart from spending a few months following a diet for stomach ulcers - and that was miserable enough (no fresh bread, fruit, or veggies was brutal), I can definitely sympathize
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
    I also agree. Take a break. I know that means just eating more of your medically required diet but more calories will still help.

    In addition, look for other ways to be nice to yourself.

    As mentioned you are in grief. This is what happens when you are forced to adjust to a new normal. It might help if you tag thoughts of food that you miss with the idea that if they make you sick they are poison to you.

  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    edited June 2020
    Can your dr. refer you to a nutritionist, maybe find some new recipes? Maybe if you shared the foods you can eat here, some of these wonderful resourceful people may be able to help you find new recipes?
  • PKM0515
    PKM0515 Posts: 3,089 Member
    edited June 2020
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    Can your dr. refer you to a nutritionist, maybe find some new recipes? Maybe if you shared the foods you can eat here, some of these wonderful resourceful people may be able to help you find new recipes?

    🔝 This. If you share your condition or what you can/can't eat, people will probably be able to help. (I definitely believe that food should be enjoyed.) 💕
  • Strudders67
    Strudders67 Posts: 989 Member
    To answer your original question - if it's nice, I go for a walk and look at other people's gardens or do some gardening of my own. If it's not nice, I try to tackle a job on my To-Do list so that I get a sense of achievement. These also distract me from why I'm feeling low. And I make sure I've eaten enough and drunk enough water.

    I agree that a maintenance break for a couple of weeks is a good idea whilst you get to grips with your new restrictions but, as SaraKim says, if you let us know what you can't eat / what your diagnosis is, then people may be able to offer alternative suggestions. Also, are these permanent changes to your way of eating or are they temporary to correct a health issue / try to eliminate an intolerance?

    Your Diary is public so I've had a look and see a number of ready made meals. As you normally enjoy cooking, could you challenge yourself to recreate some of those and perhaps add a twist to include something different that you like or to add more veg or protein etc?
    Could you bake your own bread?
    Could you have a full cooked breakfast on an irregular basis to break up the mornings? Perhaps at weekends or on days you're not at work if you work at weekends.
    Why not make your own vegetable or lentil soup? A big pot would do for a few days.
    Vary your salad ingredients and perhaps add things you may not have otherwise considered like artichoke hearts or roasted peppers (you can get them in jars in Tesco & Sainsburys in the antipasti section).
    Are you able to eat other fish such as mackerel and sardines? They'd be a change for your lunchtime salads.
    Could you make something like a vegetarian tagine to go on couscous? Vegetable cheesey-pasta bakes? Different types of curries?

    More importantly, what exercise are you doing?  And how are you calculating the calories burned?  Your diary shows that you're seemingly burning 900 - 1300 calories a day which seems an awful lot. But you're also regularly ending your day with 500-1000 left to eat which, if accurate, is really not good and may well be contributing to why you're feeling low. Some of your entries are for 0.5 pack or 1 piece or 3 medium strawberries etc, rather than by weight, but that's not going to make up for under-eating several hundred calories a day.
  • JK1542020
    JK1542020 Posts: 73 Member
    Strudders67 wrote: »
    To answer your original question - if it's nice, I go for a walk and look at other people's gardens or do some gardening of my own. If it's not nice, I try to tackle a job on my To-Do list so that I get a sense of achievement. These also distract me from why I'm feeling low. And I make sure I've eaten enough and drunk enough water.

    I agree that a maintenance break for a couple of weeks is a good idea whilst you get to grips with your new restrictions but, as SaraKim says, if you let us know what you can't eat / what your diagnosis is, then people may be able to offer alternative suggestions. Also, are these permanent changes to your way of eating or are they temporary to correct a health issue / try to eliminate an intolerance?

    Your Diary is public so I've had a look and see a number of ready made meals. As you normally enjoy cooking, could you challenge yourself to recreate some of those and perhaps add a twist to include something different that you like or to add more veg or protein etc?
    Could you bake your own bread?
    Could you have a full cooked breakfast on an irregular basis to break up the mornings? Perhaps at weekends or on days you're not at work if you work at weekends.
    Why not make your own vegetable or lentil soup? A big pot would do for a few days.
    Vary your salad ingredients and perhaps add things you may not have otherwise considered like artichoke hearts or roasted peppers (you can get them in jars in Tesco & Sainsburys in the antipasti section).
    Are you able to eat other fish such as mackerel and sardines? They'd be a change for your lunchtime salads.
    Could you make something like a vegetarian tagine to go on couscous? Vegetable cheesey-pasta bakes? Different types of curries?

    More importantly, what exercise are you doing?  And how are you calculating the calories burned?  Your diary shows that you're seemingly burning 900 - 1300 calories a day which seems an awful lot. But you're also regularly ending your day with 500-1000 left to eat which, if accurate, is really not good and may well be contributing to why you're feeling low. Some of your entries are for 0.5 pack or 1 piece or 3 medium strawberries etc, rather than by weight, but that's not going to make up for under-eating several hundred calories a day.

    Thanks for taking a look. The ready meals are a temporary fix because there was a deal on a website that caters for my dietary needs and I do struggle to cook anything with so many limitations.

    So I cant have pasta or couscous. Or bread. I have been baking my.own bread rolls which I like but I wouldnt call it bread...more of a scone but it's ok.

    Thanks for the ideas. I'm not supposed to have dairy but I havent managed to give that up yet.

    Excersise I just wear a Fitbit which is linked to mfp. I dont add in any extra excersise it just comes from my fitbit. I've frequently been told "its an awful lot". I'm not really sure what I can do about that...I have 2 kids, I excersise and do a lot of walking...so that's why i dont eat back all of my calories because people keep telling me I'm burning a lot so it makes me doubt myself and think it's too many? Either way I just wear the Fitbit I'm not doing anything unusual or crazy with it. I'm losing weight so I'm not inclined to change much. My calories do vary....I might only have 1350 one day but the next I could have 1850 depending on hunger levels.

    I dont believe I've ever logged "1 peice" unless it's my own recipe like quiche in which case I know the weight of that one peice and I will of weighed it. I think my.logging is fine, I'm losing weight and I do it as accurately as I possibley can. Similarly I feel like the very rare occasion I log something like 3 medium strawberries it's not a big deal if I'm 400 calories under my allowance.

    Thanks for the tips
  • JK1542020
    JK1542020 Posts: 73 Member
    edited June 2020
    SaraKim17 wrote: »
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    Can your dr. refer you to a nutritionist, maybe find some new recipes? Maybe if you shared the foods you can eat here, some of these wonderful resourceful people may be able to help you find new recipes?

    🔝 This. If you share your condition or what you can/can't eat, people will probably be able to help. (I definitely believe that food should be enjoyed.) 💕

    Thank you.

    Things I CAN'T eat: pasta, bread (even gluten free), couscous, gluten, white processed carbs, potatoes, sugar, fruit other than occasional berries, meat, dairy especially milk or low fat dairy, processed soya. I do however still eat dairy cheese and greek yogurt because I find it very hard to quit on top of everything else but I shouldn't really.

    Things I can eat: Fish, eggs, coconut milk, plant milks, veggies, berries in small portions, oats, sweet potatoes, black or wild rice, quinoa, beans, legumes, lentils, nuts, avocado, seeds. That's really it 😬 I am cheating by having cheese as well but I shouldnt be really. I can have organic non GMO tofu or tempeh.

    Any ideas most welcome! Generally I am living on oats or eggs for breakfast, lunch salad of some sort, dinner...disaster. some combination of the above I dont enjoy.
  • JK1542020
    JK1542020 Posts: 73 Member
    amusedmonkey wrote: »
    Take a maintenance break, and next time you start again don't go so hard. How did you deal with your food restrictions before you started losing weight? Were there allowed foods that you really enjoyed but cut out when you started dieting? Have you tried to look up recipes you find really appealing meals and make appropriate substitutions for your conditions?

    If your diagnosed restrictions are new, I feel you and I've been there in one way or another. There is a period of grief. It will take time to accept your new reality. That it is what it is and you need to make the best of it. But trust me, it does get easier. Sometimes you'll have spells of missing old foods and feeling demotivated because it's unfair, but these spells will gradually happen less often and will become farther apart.

    Don't hesitate to give yourself a maintenance break whenever you need it no matter how often. Losing 10 pounds a year every year is better than losing 5 pounds a month and then quitting out of frustration.

    Thank you. I gave myself the night off logging dinner. I still ate as planned basically but I didnt weigh it all or bother logging. My kids made some juice today, they worked really hard on it and it contained a lot of sugar and I tried some. I felt awful not trying it, but now I feel very guilty for drinking it and worried I'm damaged my health.

    I'm not sure I feel comfortable with a proper break but I'll think about it. I'm scared I'll then fall into a spiral of eating the wrong things and gaining weight and then having to start again. I'll thi k about it .
  • Lillymoo01
    Lillymoo01 Posts: 2,865 Member
    Can you experiment with herbs and spices to add additional flavour to your food to make it more enjoyable? It might also bring a bit more passion to you with cooking.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,961 Member
    This is how I feel about food too, for a totally different reason. I have a picky toddler and its so hard trying to come up with food he might eat... so I end up making the same things over and over... and he barely even eats that. Food is not fun any more.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,961 Member
    JK1542020 wrote: »
    SaraKim17 wrote: »
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    Can your dr. refer you to a nutritionist, maybe find some new recipes? Maybe if you shared the foods you can eat here, some of these wonderful resourceful people may be able to help you find new recipes?

    🔝 This. If you share your condition or what you can/can't eat, people will probably be able to help. (I definitely believe that food should be enjoyed.) 💕

    Thank you.

    Things I CAN'T eat: pasta, bread (even gluten free), couscous, gluten, white processed carbs, potatoes, sugar, fruit other than occasional berries, meat, dairy especially milk or low fat dairy, processed soya. I do however still eat dairy cheese and greek yogurt because I find it very hard to quit on top of everything else but I shouldn't really.

    Things I can eat: Fish, eggs, coconut milk, plant milks, veggies, berries in small portions, oats, sweet potatoes, black or wild rice, quinoa, beans, legumes, lentils, nuts, avocado, seeds. That's really it 😬 I am cheating by having cheese as well but I shouldnt be really. I can have organic non GMO tofu or tempeh.

    Any ideas most welcome! Generally I am living on oats or eggs for breakfast, lunch salad of some sort, dinner...disaster. some combination of the above I dont enjoy.

    assuming you're ok with cheese i have a nice salmon casserole recipe. And assuming tomatoes are OK? I'm not sure if they fall under fruit or veg.

    1 cup cooked quinoa
    1-2 cups salmon, chopped in chunks
    1-2 cups frozen green beans, peas or corn (really any veg)
    1 onion chopped (however much you like)
    1 large (19 oz) can of stewed tomatoes
    1-2 tbsp oil
    Salt ans pepper to taste
    And cheese if you want, just mix a little in at the end perhaps?

    Cook the quinoa. Then add oil to the hot pan. Add salmon and onion and some salt and pepper. Before salmon is cooked through, add the rest of the ingredients except the cheese. Mix and simmer for a little bit. Then add cheese if you want it. Its pretty simple... but possibly an option? Maybe just something different than usual?
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,311 Member
    edited June 2020
    OP: ALL YOU NEED TO DO TO LOSE WEIGHT: is eat at a caloric deficit.

    Nothing more. Nothing less.

    The TYPE of food you eat may affect your satiety to some (or even a substantial) degree but it does NOT determine your loss or gain of weight.

    You will store or lose fat based on your caloric surplus or deficit.

    While I would not advocate that you only eat fatty steaks and chocolate bars for food, absent moral objections to the non vegan aspect, you will not DAMAGE your health by OCCASIONALLY eating a fatty steak or some chocolate. OK: absent specific moral *or health issues* that precludes eating them--occasionally and in an appropriate quantity.
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,311 Member
    edited June 2020
    To clarify I do recognize that the OP clearly states medical conditions.

    And I do appreciate that this plus the restrictions can generate a feeling of grief or loss; in fact it absolutely would for me.

    And there is no doubt that the OP is trying to cope and I have no reason to doubt their sincere belief that it is to their benefit to comply with these rules.

    It still leaves a list of foods that don't appear to be internally consistent. And a situation that is making life hard for the OP.

    If you can eat black rice I don't see how you get sick by eating an almost equal amount of brown, and to take it another step, an appropriate amount of white rice.

    If you can eat a sweat potato you should be able to eat a small amount of sugar, especially together with other food that includes protein and fiber.

    If you can eat organic non gmo tempeh you should be able to eat, without getting sick, any other tempeh that has been deemed safe for humans.

    If you can NOT eat gluten, maybe not ALL but surely SOME gluten free bread should be appropriate for your needs.

    Sweet potatoes and potatoes are not from the same family of plants but nutritionally the differences between then are relatively small (check out the nutritional profile of 100g of each), so why is one ok but not the other.

    Registered dieticians (or their equivalents in other jurisdictions) being university trained in nutrition and often collaborating with doctors should be able to help the OP navigate through their diagnosis and any restrictions that they *have* to observe and perhaps offer guidance as to which of the other restrictions they've been told to follow may be more optional for them.
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,311 Member
    edited June 2020
    @hipari not really into elimination methods other than what I found by quickly checking things on the internet.

    But definitely into the question and try to further investigate things that don't pass the first sniff test.

    Beans and pulses are not considered low fodmap but ok per op restrictions.
    Rice (including brown and basmati) and quinoa are low fodmap, but out except for black rice per op restrictions.
    Grapes are low fodmap but out with other fruit per op.
    Non GMO organic soy products are OK, but products not labeled as such are actually dangerous enough to be avoided. i.e. this is not a simple preference but a medical necessity.

    This in an industry that is rife with "adventuresome" labeling where there is ZERO guarantee that a non GMO organic product.. is 100% what you think you are buying all of the time. I still remember equine protein in beef labeled products from a few years back. Or common "mislabeling" issues with fish, or shellfish products such as scallops. 🤷‍♂️

    But regardless.

    I don't want to cause more misery to the OP. I also can't help but wonder whether an outside consultant who can talk to the op's doctors and help separate medical necessities from nice to have "add on" restrictions that could be, perhaps, "relaxed" a bit would make life less miserable for the OP.

    We're in full agreement re registered dietitian review.
  • Strudders67
    Strudders67 Posts: 989 Member
    From a weight loss perspective, if you're losing at the rate you selected and it's not too rapid, then you're clearly eating at the right level, despite your diary showing lots of exercise calories and therefore lots of uneaten cals each day.

    Similar to @PAV8888, I'm also intrigued by the list of foods though. I've seen plenty of medical professionals about food intolerances over the years and I'm interested in why some foods have been banned whilst others have not. It seems odd that you've been told not to eat any meat and that you can't have brown rice. Is there a common factor that isn't glaringly obvious?

    Who gave you the list of allowed / not allowed foods? Was it someone you were referred to by your GP or was it someone you sought out yourself? Did you get further information to go away and research a more extensive list of foods that are OK? If not, could you do that? There are so many different foods out there that aren't mentioned on either list.

    It may be worth contacting your GP and asking if you can have a chat. If you were referred by your GP, talk about how restrictive the diet is and the impact it's having on you mentally re preparing meals. Ask whether there's more you could be eating to widen the menu choices. Also, find out whether it's a short term thing to try to reset something in your body as that may make life more bearable. My last intolerance test (10 years ago) meant laying off a long list of foods and drinks for three months. It was awful (yeast is in a lot of stuff), but at least I knew I could slowly reintroduce things after that time.

    If you were not referred by your GP, it would still be worth talking to him or her to ask if you can be referred to a Registered Dietician for a second opinion. Have your list of foods to hand but be aware that your GP probably doesn't have dietician training so may not be able to give advice.

    In the meantime, see if you can find any almond flour (try Holland & Barrett) or buy a big bag of ground almonds as you can bake using that. Or make your own oat flour using your porridge oats and have a go at making pasta. That would open up more options. You could also make your own flatbread using oat flour, which would give you wraps for lunch or a pizza base or something to scoop up curries with. Alternatively, get some gram flour (made from chickpeas) and make your own vegetable pakoras or chapattis, or even try using it as a substitute for regular flour in absolutely anything.

    Oatcakes with your salad or topped with a spread and some salmon and cucumber might be a welcome addition to your lunch choices. I prefer Tesco's own brand to Nairns but that's personal choice. You can also make your own houmous (or just buy it) as chickpeas must fall under legumes. I'd definitely look at other tinned fish to widen your repertoire. Beyond that, look at making vegetable or seafood curries and stirfries. You can have curries on the black rice. You don't need to have rice or noodles with the stirfries - I prefer to just have a big pile of veggies with protein mixed through it or a salmon fillet on top. Definitely look at adding more herbs and spices to your cupboard (or using what you have) as that will break the monotony. I find a salmon fillet, baked on a layer of sliced lemons and a sprinkling of dill, very tasty.
  • cupcakesandproteinshakes
    cupcakesandproteinshakes Posts: 1,161 Member
    OP. In one post you say you aren’t allowed a diary? Do you have an eating disorder and is not keeping a diary part of the treatment?

    I feel like you are leaving some important piece of information out and it may alter the advice you have been given.

    What is your medical condition?
  • Lillymoo01
    Lillymoo01 Posts: 2,865 Member
    cupcakesandproteinshakes wrote: »
    OP. In one post you say you aren’t allowed a diary? Do you have an eating disorder and is not keeping a diary part of the treatment?

    I feel like you are leaving some important piece of information out and it may alter the advice you have been given.

    What is your medical condition?

    Pretty sure she said dairy rather than diary.....
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,311 Member
    edited June 2020
    +1 dairy rather than diary; but, the comment did prompt me to look and for once MFP search worked!!!

    During this stressful and highly emotional time, I will extend sincere wishes to the OP for success in her quest to resume treatments. This definitely looks like a short term sprint, with no real push for long term weight retention considerations.

    If the OP has the time, the resources, and is truly interested in improving her experience, I would continue to urge her to collect all the information she believes she has been given and drop it into the lap of a registered dietitian who can then interpret and rank everything for her in terms of importance, helpfulness and necessity to her goals.

    If the OP's outcomes would truly benefit from an anti-inflammatory diet and lifestyle, an interesting review of what is actually included in one can be found here: https://www.fammed.wisc.edu/files/webfm-uploads/documents/outreach/im/handout_ai_diet_patient.pdf

    Take care and good luck!
  • thelastnightingale
    thelastnightingale Posts: 725 Member
    Is there anything you really like that you could make from your list of ingredients? As opposed to just stuff you'll eat?

    For me, things I would actually enjoy would be:
    • Scrambled eggs
    • Bean burger or veggie burger with sweet potato fries
    • Grilled fish with sweet potato fries
    • Tomato and bean stew
    • Blueberry pancakes (with gluten free flour - I don't know if you have Doves where you are, but I highly recommend it)

    I have dietary restrictions too (allergies) so I sympathise. I work out what I want, how many calories I have to play with, then work backwards to create a recipe that fits into that.
  • fatburninmashin
    fatburninmashin Posts: 2 Member
    I lost 40lbs, so when i feel tired , i made a backpack with about 40lbs in it and try to carry it around. Just makes me realize i have come some way and not to give up. From time to time have a cheat day, then be prepared for next 7 days to loose that water weight or better go on 1-2 day water fast and that water weight rolls off! Hope that helps.
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