How to set an appropriate goal?

globalc00

I have never had a weight or body fat goal in mind that I was trying to hit. Instead I always used the "try to be the best version of your self" approach. Unfortunately, I am losing motivation to be the best version of my self now. Even maintaining at this point doesn't seem like it is worth the effort. How do you set your goal if you think you are already "healthy" and "fit"?

hipari

If you think you're already healthy and fit and your doctor agrees (or your BMI is in the normal weight range or close to it), do you really need a weight-related goal? Could you find a fitness-related goal instead? Some people do better with a performance-oriented goal, like training for a race, improving their weight lifting or something related to their sport of choice. One motivation for my weight loss is currently to be lighter to make my upcoming aerial acrobatics (new hobby, yay!) class easier.

If you are still in the overweight/obese spectrum despite feeling healthy, I'd suggest setting a goal that would put you around the limit of normal weight and overweight BMI and see how you feel approaching that limit.

Hanibanani2020

I’m aiming to do an incredibly hard hike in a year and a half marathon in 6 months. I find fitness goals motivate me more than weightloss goals.

globalc00

My body fat according to fitbit aria is 13.5%. at 140 lbs. I"m 5"8. I have a weight training routine that I currently follow. Unfortunately, outside of the exercise I currently do to get to where i'm at, my preference is to sit in front of computer and play games and watch you tube. I have no desire to do any outdoor activity or join some competition/race such as a marathon. So my issue is at this point is if I stop my routine, am I just being lazy, or unmotivated or just part of getting old?

Hanibanani2020

No one can motivate you or discipline you, you have to decide to do that for yourself. Have you considered team sports or something that is different to what you currently do? Although weightloss is only food related, exercise is great for health and fitness especially as you age.

hipari

Well... you're normal weight, have a good body fat percentage (according to Fitbit), have a training routine you follow and don't have any desire to be more active.

Then maybe you don't need a change?

Keeping up with your weight training routine would be great for your health, though. If you want to continue gaming but also get healthier, have you tried gamified fitness apps? Zombie run, Pokemon GO, the new Harry Potter AR game come to mind. Those are great for cardiovascular health.

globalc00

To be honest, I would classify my self as lazy as i prefer to sit around or lay around all day. However because of the desire to be healthy I have always gotten my exercise in. I avg more than 20K steps a day, and haven't missed 20k steps a day in over 1 year. I get up at 5:30 every day just to work out. But like my original post says. The desire or motivation to continue to do this is diminishing. I have done a lot of googling and the common theme is that I need a goal. I just don't know what is a good goal at this point. Seems like anything I set would be a step backwards and I just feel like that would be me being lazy or slacking or becoming unmotivated.

Hanibanani2020

Maybe your goal should be to have a week off if you have walked 20k steps a day for 365 days straight

globalc00

I have done a full marathon before. I didn't train for it. I did it just because I have always felt like that was a mind over matter thing. My goal wasn't speed, it was just to finish it. Even though I got a blister around the half way mark on the bottom of my foot, I still finished it. I did feel a great accomplishment doing it, but had no desire to do it again. It was a one time deal just to prove to my self that I could do it if i really wanted to, which I did. That is the same approach I have always taken to diet and exercise. I don't miss exercise day and make excuses or fall off my diet. I hold my self accountable without much issues. The issue now is why do I keep doing this? Even at 18% body fat and 160 lbs, I would be "healthy". But is this recent loss of desire because i'm getting old or just lazy or something else?

Hanibanani2020

We don’t know you so we can’t answer that question. It could just be because you’re burnt out

globalc00

Perhaps I am burnt out. But how do you differentiate being burnt out vs someone just making excuses? If someone else on here was just starting their fitness journey, and 1 week later, they say they are burnt out, what would you say? My guesses are "We know it's hard. You just got to push though it. You can do it. It's not going to be easy. There will be ups and downs. If it was easy, everyone would be in shape. You got to want it. Remember why you started this" or something along those lines. But all that predicates on the idea that there is a goal they are trying to reach. I just never had a specific goal other than be the best version of your self.

Hanibanani2020

Well I don’t know what else to say. You know yourself. We don’t know you.

Hanibanani2020

Consider this. https://www.verywellfit.com/overtraining-syndrome-and-athletes-3119386

Strudders67

I reached my goal weight (midpoint of Normal BMI) just before lockdown and, as I was away from all temptation in the office - no endless supply of biscuits, crisps, cake, pastries etc at home - I switched to maintenance. My main goal now, although I don't actually think of it as a goal, is simply to stay within Normal BMI now that I've got here.

A side goal is to achieve better macro ratios. The suggestions I've read repeatedly, on here, are to aim for 0.6-0.8g of protein per lb of body weight (which I do without any problem) and to aim for 0.35-0.45g of fat per lb of body weight. I also read recently that the UK's Health Body recommends 30g of fibre a day, so I'm also tweaking what I eat to improve my fibre intake without taking my carbs over the 130g a day recommended as a max for T2Ds, according to Diabetes UK.

I've adjusted my set-up in MFP so that my numbers for the macros are roughly in line with those 'goals' - and am noting meal plans on days where I achieve something close. I'm healthy (my diabetes is and always has been entirely managed by diet since I was diagnosed) and fit, but good macros will make me the "best version of myself" to quote your original post.

globalc00

I too have found that the lock down made it easier for me to diet. As you stated, the constant pressure of office get together and junk food disappeared. I eat a pretty clean diet and get plenty of protein. I am not a picky eater and don't mind chicken and broccoli and egg white. Other things I eat are things you find on "healthy" foods list like oatmeal, avocado, fish, apple, blueberries, nuts and sweet potato My ratios always ends up being around 50% carb, 20% fat and 30% protein on 2700 calories. I find this to be about my maintenance calories even though MFP shows that I am in about a 400-500 calorie deficit. Lately I have been getting better at food prep to cut down on the time spent preparing the food and that has helped. I do have cheat days occasionally but my overall body fat / weight stays the same.

sardelsa

I need pretty clear goals otherwise I just loaft around and am comfortable staying the same. For me it is usually specific aesthetics and physique goals that drive me, followed by performance goals (lifting, yoga, dance). I don't want to be average, so that pushes me.

AnnPT77

globalc00 wrote: »

My body fat according to fitbit aria is 13.5%. at 140 lbs. I"m 5"8. I have a weight training routine that I currently follow. Unfortunately, outside of the exercise I currently do to get to where i'm at, my preference is to sit in front of computer and play games and watch you tube. I have no desire to do any outdoor activity or join some competition/race such as a marathon. So my issue is at this point is if I stop my routine, am I just being lazy, or unmotivated or just part of getting old?

globalc00 wrote: »

To be honest, I would classify my self as lazy as i prefer to sit around or lay around all day. However because of the desire to be healthy I have always gotten my exercise in. I avg more than 20K steps a day, and haven't missed 20k steps a day in over 1 year. I get up at 5:30 every day just to work out. But like my original post says. The desire or motivation to continue to do this is diminishing. I have done a lot of googling and the common theme is that I need a goal. I just don't know what is a good goal at this point. Seems like anything I set would be a step backwards and I just feel like that would be me being lazy or slacking or becoming unmotivated.

I'm going to be a bit of an outlier here, and assert that there's no reason to have a goal just because some internet thingummies say that's how to feel more motivated. Sure, that's one way, and it works for a lot of people. It might work for you. But it's not the only option.

I'm not a goal-motivated person, personally, Pretty much never have been. If I realize (abstractly, cognitively) that there's some change I should make in my life, to improve it, I usually try to figure out how to game my personality, preferences, limitations, etc., to get me there.

You're doing a lot of the right things for your health, and I'd point out (as an oldie myself) that those are also vitally important to the health and independence as you age. (Many of my age-mates are a vivid illustration of the "don't do this" example, sadly.) For me, that's a lot of the source of my motivation these days: I want to keep feeling good, and being able to live on my own, in the way I like to live, for another few decades. So, I try to balance my current enjoyments (which include many sedentary hobbies, plus an inclination to laziness) with visualizing my future self, and considering her needs. She needs me to be healthy, active, strong . . . or her life is going to be kind of miserable.

globalc00 wrote: »

My body fat according to fitbit aria is 13.5%. at 140 lbs. I"m 5"8. I have a weight training routine that I currently follow. Unfortunately, outside of the exercise I currently do to get to where i'm at, my preference is to sit in front of computer and play games and watch you tube. I have no desire to do any outdoor activity or join some competition/race such as a marathon. So my issue is at this point is if I stop my routine, am I just being lazy, or unmotivated or just part of getting old?

globalc00 wrote: »

Perhaps I am burnt out. But how do you differentiate being burnt out vs someone just making excuses? If someone else on here was just starting their fitness journey, and 1 week later, they say they are burnt out, what would you say? My guesses are "We know it's hard. You just got to push though it. You can do it. It's not going to be easy. There will be ups and downs. If it was easy, everyone would be in shape. You got to want it. Remember why you started this" or something along those lines. But all that predicates on the idea that there is a goal they are trying to reach. I just never had a specific goal other than be the best version of your self.

It's hard to tell just from reading what someone writes, but yeah, burnout or boredom are what it superficially sounds like. As far as burnout vs. excuses, I don't think that's an either/or. People often make excuses IMO to rationalize a course of action that, in their heart of hearts, they know is a suboptimal course to take.

For sure, it's not "just getting old". That's a classic excuse. I think it's destructive (and inaccurate) to think of aging as something that inherently and necessarily slows us down, demotivates us, forcibly makes us weaker in ways we can't overcome, makes us fall apart cognitively, or anthing like that. Sure, there are some health conditions that become statistically more likely as we age, but we have some influence over the odds. Deciding that we're on some unavoidable course "because aging" is not just an excuse, but actually a slippery slope toward worse outcomes, sooner. Don't give yourself that cognitive out. (I'm 64 BTW, not some teenager saying this stuff.)

So, look around you. Are there people a decade or more older than you, maybe even older than that, that have been firmly in the kind of lifestyle you might be inclined to slip into? How does their life look to you? Good, healthy, happy . . . or not so much? Are they "their best selves"?

BTW: You've been motivated by "be your best self". Is this current you your best self? In all respects? (It sound pretty good, but . . . .). Only you can answer that.

I'm almost never a fan of telling people to shake up their routine . . . but that's in a context where they're generally happy with their routine but think they need to change it for some dumb reason like "body confusion". In your case, if there's an element of boredom or burnout, then shaking things up might be useful.

In that vein, some of those suggestions up there about trying some of the active VR gaming options (maybe offsetting a somewhat reduced daily step count?) might be something to consider. Or, if your gaming has a particular focus in this direction, you might want to take up a related real-life thing, like archery, 3-position rifle shooting, historical re-enacting, martial arts, etc.

For me, even though I'm not a high-social-needs person, I recognize that I'm influenced by the lifestyle norms of people I surround myself with. In my case, my biggest clusters of real-life friends are on-water rowers, and artists/craftspeople. If I get way too dug in with the crafty people, at the expense of time (and influence) with my athlete buddies, I start to feel like sitting around doing mixed-media arts projects is a pretty good, normal lifestyle, and I might as well eat some Taco Bell while I do it. (Exaggerating a little, maybe.) So, in my rowing off-season (or coronavirus season ) I'm pretty aware that I need some virtual or real influence from the active/athletic side. Even MFP participation or following health/fitness authorities I admire on social media provides a little bit of a counter-balance, reinforcing the idea that being active and eating healthy foods is also a good, normal lifestyle. I want some balance, some of each.

I don't know what your gamer-culture is like, but I'm guessing there's some social-media, chat, or other lifestyle-norming stuff going on around it. Rhetorical question: Is there, and what influence does it have on you? What life balance do you want? Are you surrounding yourself with influences to create that balance?

Well, that's way enough ramble.

TL;DR: Goals are optional. Think about what you enjoy, want for the future, what motivates you (not some random internet person). Figure out your inclinations and limitations, and game those to channel your behavior in directions you see as positive. Rinse and repeat.

Best wishes!

globalc00

Thanks for the honest reply. I don’t think I’m the best version of my self yet. My goals are to live a long healthy life, but a long healthy life doesn’t require a person to have that elusive 6 pack or defined muscles. While those were never my goals, they happened and all my friends and coworkers are shocked when I show them my picture. This was when I was at15% body fat. A lot of them has struggled to get in shape and diet and asked me for advice and I have always just said it’s not hard. It’s simply whether you really want to do it or not. Everyone knows you need to diet and exercise and stick to it. So when I’m starting to want to ease of the petal, I am a little anxious as it goes against my own advice.

As I stated the lockdown has helped with my diet and I am now at 13.5% body fat and I won’t say it was easy, but not that difficult. The hardest part was time spent on the treadmill. Not the actual physical walking aspect, but the time sink. Without the need of having to go to office and moving around in the office, it was very easy for me to get less than 1000 step during 8 hour period hence I needed the extra time on the treadmill.

So now I’m thinking, why do I need 20k or workout daily other than the fact that I would feel like I’m being lazy cause I know I can do it. I feel like I’m having the same mental struggles as most people with their diet and exercise. Just seems like the pros of keeping this up is less than the pros of easing up.
Pros of keeping routine. : healthy, looks
Pros of easing up: Can still be healthy, looks were never important to me. More free time sleeping. Less time in kitchen doing meal prep and dishes. Save money on food (eating healthy is far more expensive). Less restrictions at family and friends events. Farts doesn't smell like poisonous gas 😭. Increased libido.

So at this point, I’m trying to decide what is a good goal to set so I don’t go guard rail to guard rail. Anything less than I’m doing I would just feel like I’m slacking and I know that’s not the right way of thinking.

PS on a positive note. Reading and responding to your post made the first hour and 20 minutes on treadmill fly by without me noticing. 👍