Cooking for elderly parents

ChrissyChickie

My sisters and I have been taking turns lately staying with our folks after their recent surgery/illness. My mother has cooked twice for us and both times it was really not good. During my stay, I then went through their fridge and freezer and threw out all the expired or rotten food. My turn is coming up to go stay with them again and I'm thinking of pre-cooking food for both my family and the two of them. After they are on their own again (not needing my sisters or me there on a daily basis), we are still concerned with their cooking and keeping bad food. We tried the food delivery boxes before (where you pick the meals and they give all the ingredients and recipes). The food was delicious, but all the services we tried had to much labor involved in the cooking of the meals. Anyone know of a meal plan which is simpler and not so hard to assemble? Of course we have some frozen tv meals for emergencies, but some of them have too much sodium and we also want something delicious but not junk. So we would really like to try again with the meal boxes. Any suggestions would be appreciated. Fyi, they have money, so I don't really need to look for anything based on price. Thanks.

Beautyofdreams

Do your parents qualify for Meals on Wheels? It is a service for elderly stay at home individuals that provides a low sodium or diabetic home cooked meal delivered to their home for lunch. The cost is quite reasonable and guests can purchase a meal for themselves.

ChrissyChickie

Beautyofdreams wrote: »

Do your parents qualify for Meals on Wheels? It is a service for elderly stay at home individuals that provides a low sodium or diabetic home cooked meal delivered to their home for lunch. The cost is quite reasonable and guests can purchase a meal for themselves.

Thank you, but I don't think they would qualify for that because they aren't poor or low-income, so they aren't considered vulnerable elderly. They did like the online food boxes and they were delicious, but they just don't have the stamina to do all the labor in the boxes by themselves (we did SunBasket and EveryPlate).

MaltedTea

^^ This. There's a misconception that it's a service for low cost seniors but it's really an independent living resource for every person who may be unable to healthfully (and/or safely) prep meals themselves.

All the best to your family!

ChrissyChickie

MaltedTea wrote: »

^^ This. There's a misconception that it's a service for low cost seniors but it's really an independent living resource for every person who may be unable to healthfully (and/or safely) prep meals themselves.

All the best to your family!

Oh wow, I really did think this was for low income seniors. Well, they are unable to safely prep and are seniors. I'm looking it up now. Thank you!! Thank you also to Beautyofdre... (who also mentioned this)!

nanastaci2020

Perhaps hire someone local to them to help 1 day a week, to do some batch cooking for 3 or 4 meals they can reheat easily. That would cut down on the food prep they need to do for themselves.

MaltedTea

I think we were both typing at the same time, @ChrissyChickie, but do indeed follow up with the meals on wheels (and similar services) available in your parents' area. They may have different criteria for service eligibility. And if your folks don't meet it then @nanamerriman2020's idea is a great one too!

In the before times, it could have even been a post-secondary student studying nutrition or cuisine (either you place your request on the campus job board or go through any co-op/community program opportunities a local school may have). Sigh, who knows how that'll all work now.

AliNouveau

Do a little research you might be able to find someone locally wiling to make meals to take to them. We have a friend who does that cause he doesn't cook.

Otherwise batch cooking and freezing is a good way to go. I have done that for my parents.

hipari

My grandpa lives alone and has never known how to cook (my grandma was a home ed teacher of all things, and kitchen was her domain). So, my sister, cousin and I run a batch cooking ring. My last turn was in December: I picked up all the empty tupperware containers from his apartment, spent one day cooking, and brought full containers to his freezer. It was something like 70 portions. He can thaw and heat them on his own, and he supplements with ready-to-eat meals from the grocery store for when he wants more variety - I cooked probably 5 or 6 different things. Then, in March, my cousin picked up the empty containers again and did her batch, and now in June my sister did the same. Grandpa pays for all the ingredients. Every time my aunt visits she brings some baked goodies and treats to his freezer too. And yeah, every time one of us visits him in person, we clear the fridge because there’s always something rotting there.

My grandpa really loves these homemade frozen meals as they remind him of our grandma (unsurprising, she taught all of us a lot about cooking). Also, he’s the absolute opposite of a volume eater, so we have to squeeze in as much calories as possible in the tiny little box. He’s old and frail enough that it’s best for him to eat as many calories as possible and then get vitamins from a pill so calories aren’t ”wasted” in vegetables that fill him up. I’ve been getting creative with how many calories I can fit into a cup of food (about his meal volume) while still keeping it a proper dish instead of just straight-up freezing olive oil.

Just in case this is an issue for your parents, here are some tricks: fattiest protein sources possible, like salmon, full-fat ground beef, bacon. If something calls for milk, it can be replaced with heavy cream. Full-fat cheese can be added to almost anything. Pesto is delicious in baked pasta dishes, too. Whitest and simplest carbs for minimal satiety, so he hopefully eats more snacks.

jen_fitnhappy

Have you looked into Freshly? Freshly is a meal delivery where the meals are already cooked and healthy (no preservatives, etc). Just heat and eat! My husband and I have been subscribing for about 6 months and we love them! We originally subscribed for “portion control” because my husband loooooves to eat and it limits his servings. Having a Freshly meal with a side salad is just enough. We think they taste really good!!

I recommended this to my parents because my mom was very ill (she has since passed) and my dad had to all the caretaking and household duties. It made his job a little easier and worrying about dinners was one less thing he had to do. They also had salads with them, which I prepared weekly and brought over to them.

Kudos to you and your sisters for all you are doing! I have been there and it’s not easy. Your parents are lucky to have you. Good luck!

ChrissyChickie

hipari wrote: »

My grandpa lives alone and has never known how to cook (my grandma was a home ed teacher of all things, and kitchen was her domain). So, my sister, cousin and I run a batch cooking ring. My last turn was in December: I picked up all the empty tupperware containers from his apartment, spent one day cooking, and brought full containers to his freezer. It was something like 70 portions. He can thaw and heat them on his own, and he supplements with ready-to-eat meals from the grocery store for when he wants more variety - I cooked probably 5 or 6 different things. Then, in March, my cousin picked up the empty containers again and did her batch, and now in June my sister did the same. Grandpa pays for all the ingredients. Every time my aunt visits she brings some baked goodies and treats to his freezer too. And yeah, every time one of us visits him in person, we clear the fridge because there’s always something rotting there.

My grandpa really loves these homemade frozen meals as they remind him of our grandma (unsurprising, she taught all of us a lot about cooking). Also, he’s the absolute opposite of a volume eater, so we have to squeeze in as much calories as possible in the tiny little box. He’s old and frail enough that it’s best for him to eat as many calories as possible and then get vitamins from a pill so calories aren’t ”wasted” in vegetables that fill him up. I’ve been getting creative with how many calories I can fit into a cup of food (about his meal volume) while still keeping it a proper dish instead of just straight-up freezing olive oil.

Just in case this is an issue for your parents, here are some tricks: fattiest protein sources possible, like salmon, full-fat ground beef, bacon. If something calls for milk, it can be replaced with heavy cream. Full-fat cheese can be added to almost anything. Pesto is delicious in baked pasta dishes, too. Whitest and simplest carbs for minimal satiety, so he hopefully eats more snacks.

Wow, 70 portions is a lot. Just curious, do you have a regular menu that you rotate?

ChrissyChickie

jen_fitnhappy wrote: »

Have you looked into Freshly? Freshly is a meal delivery where the meals are already cooked and healthy (no preservatives, etc). Just heat and eat! My husband and I have been subscribing for about 6 months and we love them! We originally subscribed for “portion control” because my husband loooooves to eat and it limits his servings. Having a Freshly meal with a side salad is just enough. We think they taste really good!!

I recommended this to my parents because my mom was very ill (she has since passed) and my dad had to all the caretaking and household duties. It made his job a little easier and worrying about dinners was one less thing he had to do. They also had salads with them, which I prepared weekly and brought over to them.

Kudos to you and your sisters for all you are doing! I have been there and it’s not easy. Your parents are lucky to have you. Good luck!

Thank you!! I just looked into Meals on Wheels. There isn't one near them, but there is another organization that does this type of service, so I left them a message to see if I can pay for there service. We used SunBasket and EveryPlate before (food was delicious, but too time consuming to prepare for them). I had not heard of Freshly. I'll look them up now. Thank you.

kshama2001

If there is something like a Council on Aging in their town, that might have resources.

Additionally, (perhaps depending on the state,) Medicare may pick up most of the costs for someone to come in - my OH's parents got a lot of services through an eldercare agency with a very reasonable copay. There was an evaluation through a social worker, and then services were provided.

Speaking of rotten food - I tossed some stuff from my 82 yo mom's frig yesterday, but have actually been doing this for decades - she's just not good at rotating

hipari

@ChrissyChickie I think my last round included just different baked oven casseroles. I did 3 different variations of a baked pasta casserole with ground beef, cream, egg and cheese (a traditional Finnish dish my grandpa likes): some ”regular”, some with pesto, some with bacon. Then I did some salmon potato casserole, a creamy baked salmon pasta dish, and a ham potato casserole. So, I think 6 (slightly) different dishes total. There might be some variation each time it’s my turn to cook, but along these lines. I switch things up with different spices and herbs (although his palate is very limited and very northern European - anything hot is no-go), and I might put different spices in two oven dishes of the same food - I think half of the salmon pasta had chives and half had dill, for example. What I make varies from time to time, but usually something close to this list: simple to make in large batches, easy modifications for taste options, calorie-dense, minimal chopping or prepping. I absolutely buy things like pre-chopped frozen onion cubes and pre-diced ham to make things easier.

My sister makes traditional cabbage rolls that are a lot more work, but she makes less other things. My cousin does a cheesy veggie soup grandpa always requests when it’s her turn. We each have different ”specialties”, I think the other two don’t make any salmon dishes.

70 portions sounds like a lot and it is, but his portions are small - I would personally get angry and demand a second (and maybe third) portion if I was offered that for dinner, but his appetite is so small he can barely finish the portion. It takes one full day to do the whole thing: I make a plan and grocery list, walk to take my mom’s car (I don’t have a car and she lives nearby), go to the grocery store, do the cooking at my mom’s house (she has a bigger and better kitchen), pack the portions and bring them to grandpa’s, return mom’s car and walk back home. The most time-consuming part is packing the portions into containers, adding a piece of tape to each lid and writing what’s in that box and the date it was prepared.

When we take the containers to grandpa’s freezer, we try to organize them so that he can easily see what different options are available. I don’t know about the other girls, but at least I usually also write a list of all the options and put it on his fridge door.

Yeah, it takes all day and is a lot of work, but the upside is I only have to do it once or twice per year, so I save a lot of time and energy compared to if I had to do the cooking more often, take him grocery shopping frequently, or something like that.

ythannah

Investigate some of the different lines of frozen single-serve meals, a few of them are quite decent nutritionally. I think a lot of companies have put some effort into producing "healthier" quick meals. My elderly father is very much a food purist (low sodium and sugar) and he likes the veggie + protein "bowl" types. The Healthy Choice Simply line is generally good, although you do have to watch the sodium on some varieties. In Canada the President's Choice Blue Menu line is excellent for lower sodium and sugar, and "less junky".

deputy_randolph

My dad is 70 and lives alone. He makes a lot of crockpot mealsthat require minimal effort to prep (stews/soups) and can be reheated easily through the week.