Nothing Works

stargirlshrinks

I have no idea what's happened to me but I'm 33 years old and no matter what i do I can't control how much I eat....My family is always eating food and I have to cook for them and eat with them and everytime I do I end up eating more than I said I would.

So far I've been capable of controlling portion sizes for at least 2 out of 3 meals but everytime I crash and eat more I feel like a failure.

This is so hard. When I was 21 it was easy to comitt to my diet and keep it going but now I've been struggling for 4 years with yo yo dieting.

I don't know what to do. My family says I should get surgery to get rid of the fat so that's a bummer for me because I wanted to do this naturally with exercise and diet.

Should I invest in meal delivery services and restrict my intake to just that? That way I don't eat the food that they eat?

Help.

chulipa

Why not just cook food for you separate from there food that’s what I do my husband eats what he likes and I eat what I want.That way you only have what you need for that meal no exra

NovusDies

First let's make sure you are following this chart and not trying to lose too fast:



Are you exercising? If so, are you eating back some of your exercise calories?

How much protein are you getting in your first two meals?

chulipa

Weight loss surgery in my opinion can be good but it’s only a tool anyway you look at it you must eat less and move more and if you have any kind of eating problems you will just gain the weight back. Find what works best for you and maybe see a dietitian

88olds

Sounds like you need a better plan. Or plans. Each situation or meal can be unique.

Have you tried full on calorie counting? It’s a set of things to do, researching and planning menus, weighing and measuring to control portions, keeping a food diary, and problem solving when things don’t work out. Start by calculating the calorie target to maintain at your current weight. Aim for that to get started. You can plan for a modest deficit once you have the routines down.

The secret to weight loss is hiding in plain sight. It’s a calorie deficit. But a workable weight loss plan has two parts- eating in a calorie deficit and living with it. There’s a tendency to go all in on the most aggressive deficit conceivable and then try to beat ourselves into living with it. Generally it doesn’t work out.

You can do this. What has happened in your past attempts is irrelevant. The past does not control the future.

stargirlshrinks

Thank you everyone that was helpful.

I'm creating a new plan and gonna keep trying.

spyro88

Sorry to hear you're struggling I wonder what the difference is now, that makes it so much harder for you to stick to your diet plan compared to when you were 21? Do you have less motivation/ why do you think that is if so? Sounds like family commitments make it difficult too - can you do anything to change how you eat around them, maybe eat separately? Could anyone else in the family cook sometimes? Could the rest of the family commit to a healthier lifestyle as well to support you?

If you can put your finger on exactly what's changed and made it harder since you were 21, that might be a starting point for trying to address it and make a plan.

Also, I hope this won't be taken the wrong way, but if that is you in your profile picture then I am really surprised your family are suggesting weight loss surgery. You really don't look obese/ like you need weight loss surgery!

LunaTheFatCat

Aw it can be hard at times, I think most people here can relate.

I'm a bit surprised reading about the option of surgery, you don't look like a candidate for that in your profile picture anyway! What are your stats if you don't mind me asking?

Are you logging your foods/drinks here on MFP (your diary is private, so I can't tell)?

Maybe it's just some minor tricks, ie if you have the pots and pans on the table for all to help themselves, maybe weigh/measure your own portion first, and leave the pots in the kitchen.

I sent you a friend request

NovusDies

stargirlshrinks wrote: »

Thank you everyone that was helpful.

I'm creating a new plan and gonna keep trying.

Make sure your new plan addresses more of the mental aspects of managing yourself in weight loss and less on food. Portion control IS how we lose weight but we have to address the part of us that compelling part of us that wants to eat more than we need.

I mention this book with the caveat that while I am sure there is a chance it could be the total answer for some people I do not believe in a universal solution. With self-study CBT if something is not working you will need to take on the second role of being your own coach. You will need to be an objective problem solver. However, this is a role you need to take on for yourself anyway. You will be living with and feeding yourself for a very long time and situations will arise that you will need to work through.

Anyway the book is "The Beck Diet Solution"