Career change help

emmies_123
emmies_123 Posts: 513 Member
Hi all,

TLDR: What do you do? How did you get into it? Do you enjoy it?

I am going to do the crazy thing, and open up about myself to complete strangers and seek advice from them. This year has led to a lot of self-reflection for me, and made me realize I am really not happy at the position I'm in currently. I don't wish to further my career in the industry, I don't enjoy what I'm doing at the moment, BUT I have no idea what else I would want to do. I have anxiety and mild depression, and it is easier to stick to what I know than seek something I might actually enjoy. Especially if I have to build it myself!

Considerations I have to factor in:
-I can't just quit or go Part-time at current job to get time back and focus on myself. Doing so would harm me financially and emotionally, as spouse would NOT be happy with me doing that.
-I am burnt out and currently feeling overwhelmed with what I want to do to improve self. I feel like I don't have enough free time to dedicate and focus on becoming my best self
-This year is crazy and am I being insane wanting to leave a good paying job with security just because i'm not happy
-Current job is likely (but not confirmed) to disappear within the next 2 years. It is a small company and Owner, VP, and CFO are all hitting retirement age in the next 2 years. Owner is already openly planning for retirement, and job may end sooner if she sells company or business gets hit any harder than it already has in the last year and a half... I'm in early 30s and nowhere near retirement.

I realize I need more insight into what kind of jobs are out there! My immediate circle of friends are all in IT industry or teachers, so I don't have a lot of people in my life to ask about their experiences.
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Replies

  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,741 Member
    What is your current job and industry (vaguely, if necessary)? Would buying the current business be an option? I know you said you don't care for it but perhaps being an owner and changing your current responsibilities may change that.

    Other than that, what do you like to do? Special skills? Areas of interest?
  • emmies_123
    emmies_123 Posts: 513 Member
    Current job is accountant, work for a government contractor in USA. I dislike the contracting industry in general, and have no interest in continuing accounting career, and don't want 30+ more years of entry level bookkeeping. I jumped to accounting when my first degree did not land a job, and I had loans to pay. I have since paid off those loans (YAY!) and while the money is nice I would much rather enjoy my time spent on this earth.

    Hobbies I enjoy cross stitch, and video games (RPGs mostly). Fitness has grown into a passion in the last year also.
    I'm not sure I have any special skills, maybe organizing but not sure how much that translates.

    At the basic level I've considered getting certified as a fitness instructor and nutritionist. But I wanted to hear more about what others do before I invest serious energy into that route.
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,741 Member
    Not sure where you are but in my area it's hard to make a living being a personal trainer / fitness instructor / nutritionist. Also, I don't think you'd have the schedule you do now (I'm guessing M - F with weekends and holidays off).

    I'm not much of a risk taker so I'd go more along the route of pursuing something that makes you happy outside of your current employment and keep the steady income. So, I hope all of the other peeps here chime in with some better advice!
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    COLBY+ART.jpg
  • emmies_123
    emmies_123 Posts: 513 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    COLBY+ART.jpg

    Sigh, after the heck project I've been doing for work the last two hours I am so tempted =P
  • emmies_123
    emmies_123 Posts: 513 Member
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    Not sure where you are but in my area it's hard to make a living being a personal trainer / fitness instructor / nutritionist. Also, I don't think you'd have the schedule you do now (I'm guessing M - F with weekends and holidays off).

    I'm not much of a risk taker so I'd go more along the route of pursuing something that makes you happy outside of your current employment and keep the steady income. So, I hope all of the other peeps here chime in with some better advice!

    I am not a risk taker either, which is why trying to jump start this is so hard =P But even if I stay in my nice comfortable rut it is likely going in 2 years sooooo best to use this time to grow towards something new.

    I doubt I could make a living as a fitness instructor either, and you are spot on with schedule. However I could take a paycut for the sake of happiness, and I really want time back. Currently my job takes 10.5 out of my day (with commute included) and leaves me too mentally exhausted by the end to do any hobbies. Even if I got something with a more rotational shift if I got some time back for me that would be worth it.
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,741 Member
    Oh, that commute would be killer! I'd be open to a pay cut to eliminate that and get some time back too, so I understand that.

    Grocery stores and delivery places are doing well despite current circumstances so that may be an option. Does your current employer have a succession plan for their current business or have related opportunities for you? I work for an independent business owner who doesn't plan on retiring but knows she needs to plan for the inevitable so she's contacted someone and they are drawing up legal documents for a succession plan so I can somewhat relate.

    Did you have other interests or aspirations before your current job?

  • emmies_123
    emmies_123 Posts: 513 Member
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    Oh, that commute would be killer! I'd be open to a pay cut to eliminate that and get some time back too, so I understand that.

    Grocery stores and delivery places are doing well despite current circumstances so that may be an option. Does your current employer have a succession plan for their current business or have related opportunities for you? I work for an independent business owner who doesn't plan on retiring but knows she needs to plan for the inevitable so she's contacted someone and they are drawing up legal documents for a succession plan so I can somewhat relate.

    Did you have other interests or aspirations before your current job?

    I think the current plan is to sell to another business owner. While I am on the corporate tier I am too low to be kept on if sold. Or it may straight up close if she can't sell it. I am also not high up enough to be included in plans, all I know is what I overhear when I walk by their offices.
    If it was me, with those hours, I'd just really focus on saving enough money, first, until you can take 3-6 months off work or atleast quit without it messing you up. Then, you'll have more time to think about it and maybe do some research or take classes if you need to. I know it's easier said than done! I like the Extreme Early Retirement website and Mr. Money Mustache.

    Real talk - my husband is not willing to let me straight quit anything. He is potentially open to me going part time at current job IF I have a reason (aka something else GOOD lined up or definite plan to go back to school). Otherwise keep milking the paycheck. I am not willing to test my marriage by putting my foot down, but agree I would likely be much productive on career search if I could focus on it. Currently my only real time to work towards it is on quiet workdays, and I get interrupted if a task comes in.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,961 Member
    edited November 2020
    I'm an engineer. If you get into the RIGHT job it can be interesting. But im also just burning out on the sexism *kitten*. Thought I could handle it and let it roll off me, but you know what its 2020 and I expect better. And even if it doesn't "hurt" me I also dont want sexism to be my life day in and day out for the next 30 years.

    Depending on the job it may not be 9 to 5 and the responsibility and risk may be high... im discovering... I don't really like responsibility and am not the most ambitious person out there. So im actually now at home with the kids for the next 4ish years and considering taking evening online classes to do something different as well.

    But I do like the design work, the problem solving and the math. A good boss goes a long, long way. Crummy clients go the other way. And I wasn't a fan of climbing 30' ladders propped in the middle of the room into an attic with no way to restrain a fall.. especially getting back down.

    My partner took their accounting degree into financial reporting instead of bookkeeping and is now seeking out a manager position. Is that a direction you could be interested in?
  • emmies_123
    emmies_123 Posts: 513 Member
    VeryKatie wrote: »
    I'm an engineer. If you get into the RIGHT job it can be interesting. But im also just burning out on the sexism *kitten*. Thought I could handle it and let it roll off me, but you know what its 2020 and I expect better. And even if it doesn't "hurt" me I also dont want sexism to be my life day in and day out for the next 30 years.

    Depending on the job it may not be 9 to 5 and the responsibility and risk may be high... im discovering... I don't really like responsibility and am not the most ambitious person out there. So im actually now at home with the kids for the next 4ish years and considering taking evening online classes to do something different as well.

    But I do like the design work, the problem solving and the math. A good boss goes a long, long way. Crummy clients go the other way. And I wasn't a fan of climbing 30' ladders propped in the middle of the room into an attic with no way to restrain a fall.. especially getting back down.

    My partner took their accounting degree into financial reporting instead of bookkeeping and is now seeking out a manager position. Is that a direction you could be interested in?

    So I will say thank you for being the first responder to actually answer my original request =P

    I can relate with not liking responsibility or having as much ambition!
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,961 Member
    edited November 2020
    emmies_123 wrote: »
    VeryKatie wrote: »
    I'm an engineer. If you get into the RIGHT job it can be interesting. But im also just burning out on the sexism *kitten*. Thought I could handle it and let it roll off me, but you know what its 2020 and I expect better. And even if it doesn't "hurt" me I also dont want sexism to be my life day in and day out for the next 30 years.

    Depending on the job it may not be 9 to 5 and the responsibility and risk may be high... im discovering... I don't really like responsibility and am not the most ambitious person out there. So im actually now at home with the kids for the next 4ish years and considering taking evening online classes to do something different as well.

    But I do like the design work, the problem solving and the math. A good boss goes a long, long way. Crummy clients go the other way. And I wasn't a fan of climbing 30' ladders propped in the middle of the room into an attic with no way to restrain a fall.. especially getting back down.

    My partner took their accounting degree into financial reporting instead of bookkeeping and is now seeking out a manager position. Is that a direction you could be interested in?

    So I will say thank you for being the first responder to actually answer my original request =P

    I can relate with not liking responsibility or having as much ambition!

    Haha I hear you.

    So reading your post again it sounds like you dont have a lot of energy or time to re-education but you might want something new within the next 2 years.

    My sister took a copy editing certificate part time over two years and now has successfully built a small repeat clientele and edits their articles and books from home as it fits in her schedule. I dont know if that kind of attention to detail suits you, or if you're looking to be a freelancer. But its another carreer option.

    My brother does it stuff in the airforce... (he actually liked boot camp lol and you said you're enjoying fitness)

    My other brother does management consulting even though his original degree was also engineering.

    I have a friend who recently educated to be an electrician.

    Social workers, paramedics...

    Secretarial...

    My sil does payroll and is a controller with her accounting education.

    You could explore drafting or interior design... this is what I'm leaning towards now. I think it would be fun to design homes and basements.

    How about becoming a Konmari or other organization/declutter consultant? Or apply at an estate sale company?

    If you like nutrition there is also occupational therapy... we used one to have feeding therapy with my picky toddler. And there are other routes you can take that one.

    Or physical therapy or something similar? Massage, chiropractor, acupuncture... kinesiology.

    Happiness in a job is important. It's why, even during 2020, I chose to leave my well paying job to stay home and my husband is possibly risking going to a new company now too. But we also have done a lot of saving so financial security is less of a concern... and worst case we could move to a cheaper house and I could go back to work anywhere I could find it.
  • emmies_123
    emmies_123 Posts: 513 Member
    Hmmm copy editing sounds interesting, I will have to add that to my list of things to research.

    Worried about military positions as I really can't move. My husband is civilian DoD employee and has a great job, we aren't uprooting any time soon.

    Definitely couldn't be a social worker or paramedic. My anxiety wouldn't be able to take the pressure.

    Organizational/declutter is my second industry on my list =) I would have to really shadow and experiment with that one, not sure if I have enough spatial puzzle ability to really make a go of it.

    Will have to look into occupational therapy, that didn't come up on my list of health/mindfulness opportunities when I previously researched. I have physical therapy, sports education, fitness instructor, nutritionist, dietician flagged already =)

    My husband is very much in favor of milking current paycheck and find a way to settle mind with current situation. If I can last one more year without rocking the boat we will be in much more stable financial situation. But a year sounds like a very long time. I've been considering career shift since last March, if not earlier.
  • Ikeeptrying2
    Ikeeptrying2 Posts: 156 Member
    Almost 30 years for me in the large corporate arena doing financial stuff. Eventually completely burned out from the stress. Was downsized at the end of last year and didn't care.

    Covid has delayed many possibilities of getting back into something. It will NOT be what I have done in the past (neither will the compensation). Just need something to bridge for the next 10 years so I am not looking beyond that.

    Explored various career programs to identify my next move to transfer the skills I actually want to use moving forward.

    This process alone takes serious time if you give it that. I would strongly encourage you to do it so you don't make a sideways move or worse. It's hard to know what makes sense to do next when you can't identify it somewhat with a clear mind. Many books on this topic (Parachute, Dummies, etc...) + career counselors/coaches (which may not be worth the costs-at least for me).

    Fortunately my spouse is 100% supportive so I'm not pressured. We live simply and have always tried to keep overhead low which helps alleviate the financial burdens.

    I think many of us get backed into these situations and a second act is in order. Give yourself the time it deserves and explore yours (or at least the possibility of).
  • emmies_123
    emmies_123 Posts: 513 Member
    Almost 30 years for me in the large corporate arena doing financial stuff. Eventually completely burned out from the stress. Was downsized at the end of last year and didn't care.

    Covid has delayed many possibilities of getting back into something. It will NOT be what I have done in the past (neither will the compensation). Just need something to bridge for the next 10 years so I am not looking beyond that.

    Explored various career programs to identify my next move to transfer the skills I actually want to use moving forward.

    This process alone takes serious time if you give it that. I would strongly encourage you to do it so you don't make a sideways move or worse. It's hard to know what makes sense to do next when you can't identify it somewhat with a clear mind. Many books on this topic (Parachute, Dummies, etc...) + career counselors/coaches (which may not be worth the costs-at least for me).

    Fortunately my spouse is 100% supportive so I'm not pressured. We live simply and have always tried to keep overhead low which helps alleviate the financial burdens.

    I think many of us get backed into these situations and a second act is in order. Give yourself the time it deserves and explore yours (or at least the possibility of).

    Can you explain what you mean by "Explored various career programs"? I am currently trying to follow the (free) guidance on a few career shift sites, but it is so hard when I'm just starting the process to think how things are going to work out.
  • Ikeeptrying2
    Ikeeptrying2 Posts: 156 Member
    Some books will help try to guide you through the thought process. What Color is your Parachute is one of the gold standards. 'Pivot: The Only Move That Matters Is Your Next One' is another...

    Another one I know people who got a bunch out of is 'Do What You Are: Discover the Perfect Career for You Through the Secrets of Personality Type'

    There are MANY though. You may need to spend time trying to find what speaks to you most. I've used a few.

    Check your local community (county level) to see if they have a job resource center. Ours is huge and helpful, plus 100% free. Staff to help guide and offer various services.

    Sounds like you have to dig deep to determine what you would like to come next for yourself. This is not an easy, nor quick process. Job hopping is not the answer long term. Things can get worse if not careful.

    Developing clarity takes effort.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member


    Developing clarity takes effort.

    QFT

    ...... due diligence is a wonderful thing.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,961 Member
    edited November 2020
    Aw thats such a hard day. I have had bosses do that to me as well. And clients. Its no fun. I am not one who can calm down easily either. I end up hiding in the bathroom for 20-60 mins, and then feel even worse that I got no work done.

    In addition to exploring new opportunities, maybe you could explore marriage counseling. Many people in all walks of life have to take time off work if their situation isn't working or if they are re-educating, even if they are single and don't have a backup income. Because short term does not outweigh long term. And this is something pretty basic and pretty common that a partner should understand is a possibility. What would he do if the situation was reversed? What would you do?

    Can you afford to try the trainer thing? Take the classes and test, find employment... and then do something else again if it isnt working for you? You did say right from the get go that you're interested in it. So maybe taking the plunge is exactly what you should do. I wouldn't call it knee jerk either. Your very first post in this thread says its what you want to try.

    Can you go get a job somewhere else doing anything while you figure out what you want to do? So that at least you can get out of a situation you dont want to be in?
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,741 Member
    I'm sorry you're struggling so much with work. We recently did a huge transition at work and I've been in a non-stop, overwhelming mess since May of this year with no end in sight. I too, for the first time in 25+ years am frustrated and would like other options but for personal reasons I'm staying put for now.

    Are there any companies around you hiring for any type of finance or admin related positions? What about being a virtual admin assistant?

    I don't want to address the lack of support from your husband because it's none of my business but because of that I tend to think a personal trainer might not be suitable for your situation if that means you'll be working odd hours and have a different schedule from your husband, not to mention working one-on-one with males. If I'm completely wrong on that (and I hope I am) I sincerely apologize.

    I'm glad you posted the update and I hope you can find something that makes you happy!
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    Do what I did.

    Kick it all to the curb and go surfing.

    giphy.gif
  • chocolate_owl
    chocolate_owl Posts: 1,695 Member
    You definitely seem like you need a change ASAP. In your shoes, I'd look for another job similar to the one you currently have just to be in a healthier environment. If you're crying under your desk, you need to NOT be working for that company!!

    If you can't find any accounting jobs, you might look at more logistical things like planning/buying inventory. Resource management in general requires someone who knows their way around spreadsheets and might use software programs you're already familiar with. Project management might also be something you could easily transition to.

    If I'm honest, personal training really does seem like a knee-jerk reaction to me. Big gyms probably aren't hiring right now because of Covid, and it is WORK to build up your brand as an independent trainer. You'll probably spend way more on marketing yourself than you'd bring in for a long time, and it sounds like your husband won't be about that at all. There's plenty of online retraining programs that could get you into a new career - for example, Microsoft/LinkedIn are offering free learning paths and $15 training courses through March 2021: https://blogs.microsoft.com/blog/2020/06/30/microsoft-launches-initiative-to-help-25-million-people-worldwide-acquire-the-digital-skills-needed-in-a-covid-19-economy/?utm_source=morning_brew

    If office life and being behind a desk all day are part of what's making you miserable, that may not be quite as easy to transition out of, but if you can at least get away from your horrible boss and get a shorter commute for the time being, that might give you breathing room to figure out what comes next.
  • MidlifeCrisisFitness
    MidlifeCrisisFitness Posts: 1,106 Member
    As an accountant can you investigate tax auditing or maybe tax or grant specialist for an advisor firm?

    Also what about sales?
  • Slacker16
    Slacker16 Posts: 1,184 Member
    emmies_123 wrote: »
    (...) My immediate circle of friends are all in IT industry or teachers, so I don't have a lot of people in my life to ask about their experiences.
    Well, I teach as a main gig and occasionally do some freelance programming on the side. Lol.

    Anyway, I'm in my mid 30's now and went through a career change a few years back when I must have been roughly your age. Much less drastic than what you're considering, research => current setup, but still.

    One thing that helped me land on my feet was figuring out which skills I already had that could be repurposed. For instance, I have no formal education in computer science but had done a fair amount of programming as part of research and had been exposed to a lot of algorithmics and cryptography, so IT was a natural segue...

    Also, I don't know if it needs to be said but a work environment that has you crying under your desk isn't normal.
  • emmies_123
    emmies_123 Posts: 513 Member
    Thanks to everyone that responded. I'm in the office again today and I tell you it was like feeling a weight grow on my chest as I got closer and closer. And for the first time I had to brace myself to get out of the car and walk in. I feel like something is wrong with me that I can't just handle the situation and move on and accept the paycheck with grace.

    I'll try to address all the responses I saw between update and here:

    -Being in the office is part of the problem I think. Everything I have considered as a potential shift is more active and has visible results (aka not just moving numbers around spreadsheets)
    -I hear all of you that said find something else similar just to get away from this particular office. As this isn't an industry I want to continue in I feel like I'm being dishonest to new employer to interview for a place in my current field, knowing I'm trying to leave it and that the work doesn't make me happy. I'm not sure how deep the mental damage goes to know if I would be able to bounce back doing the same thing somewhere else.
    -on that note, I have looked for something closer to home in my field, just because I'm so miserable here. Sadly my region of the state is pretty devoid of opportunities outside of retail (which my husband will NOT let me "Backslide" to). Everything in my career path is a 45-90 min drive one way, going from suburbs to downtown.
    -Personal training: I understand it would be difficult. I have seen over 5 different postings on the generic job sites in the last few weeks though, so places down here are still hiring for it. I would also have an in with the local crossfit gym i used to go to pre-Covid, as I'm friendly with the trainers at two different locations.
    -My husband is not excited that I'm naturally drawn towards possibilities that require social interaction during a pandemic. But I feel like I should follow my heart and start re-educating anyway

    -Slacker16: What is it like teaching? I thought about it as an option but I know that would require a LOT of schooling to even try.

    Husband and I had a talk last night that...I'm not sure how it went?
    -I tried to bring up temping as an option so I could get away from here. He isn't sold on the instability of it
    -I asked if I could go PT at current job if I needed more energy for school, whatever i choose to pursue. He said maybe, if I needed it.
    -When I described the situation that led to the crying he went all beastmode and told me (forcefully, not helping my anxiety) that I should file a hostile work complaint or HE would reach out to owner of my company. That is NOT helpful, and would make my work situation way worse at this company. He is also still not willing to let me run away from it entirely sooo....thanks babe
    -He really isn't keen on the idea that I might take multiple attempts to find what I want in life. He is supportive of me going and doing something, but he wants me to know it's what I want. I'm just...not sure. I'm more sure on the type of work I want, but not enough to say "I want to be x." To be that sure I need to put a lot more time into researching what it is like and other factors about everything I am interested in, and that delays my escape.
  • emmies_123
    emmies_123 Posts: 513 Member
    KHMcG wrote: »
    As an accountant can you investigate tax auditing or maybe tax or grant specialist for an advisor firm?

    Also what about sales?

    Sorry missed yours in the main update. I get that that is the next logical step for a career shift but honestly I hate taxes. I've known since schooling for accounting that I hate taxes. The closest I've come to considering something else in financial field is "financial advisor" that specialized in helping people make budgets and live within their means. And that isn't super high on my list of potentials
  • MidlifeCrisisFitness
    MidlifeCrisisFitness Posts: 1,106 Member
    Change of direction... Not sure career is the issue. What is the main goal for your marriage? I am not a therapist nor do I know you. I know if this was how I reacted to my wife "beastmode" we would have issues on any topic.

    I would look into couples counciling first. My wife and I have been for months now. It has been a Godsend for us. Perhaps it's because it is written but it sounds like you don't agree with your husband and that he is perhaps not taking your feelings into account. The job is secondary to this is the bigger issue. I'm not certain a new career will remove the heavy feeling you have.
  • emmies_123
    emmies_123 Posts: 513 Member
    KHMcG wrote: »
    Change of direction... Not sure career is the issue. What is the main goal for your marriage? I am not a therapist nor do I know you. I know if this was how I reacted to my wife "beastmode" we would have issues on any topic.

    I would look into couples counciling first. My wife and I have been for months now. It has been a Godsend for us. Perhaps it's because it is written but it sounds like you don't agree with your husband and that he is perhaps not taking your feelings into account. The job is secondary to this is the bigger issue. I'm not certain a new career will remove the heavy feeling you have.

    Well I very rarely see my husband's beastmode. I think I have seen it maybe 3 times in the 10-11 years we have been together. Honestly I just react very poorly to visible anger from anyone, even when not directed at me. In fight/flight, I am "panicked bunny/deer" mode

    My husband is taking my feelings into account, I think he is just scared that I am running away from conflict instead of trying to strengthen from it. I have job searched on /off since Spring of 2019 for something in my current field and so he is very aware that if I quit now I am unlikely to find anything else quickly.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    take charge of your life.

    join now.

    https://en.legion-recrute.com
  • Slacker16
    Slacker16 Posts: 1,184 Member
    emmies_123 wrote: »
    -Slacker16: What is it like teaching? I thought about it as an option but I know that would require a LOT of schooling to even try.
    There's no one answer to this question, it depends enormously on what level you teach at and where you live.

    Currently, I teach... let's say community college would be the equivalent in the US - I'm guessing that's where you live based on this site's demographic - and enjoy it, but wouldn't be willing to teach at the elementary or high school level because having to do discipline isn't fun.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    This thread has motivated me; it damn sure has.

    Ima going to make a career change too.

    I kinda like the sound of: "Spiritual Advisor"

    I reckon that I'll just get some business cards printed up & I'll be on my way !