Beyond Love?

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Replies

  • beagletracks
    beagletracks Posts: 6,034 Member
    There is nothing beyond the purest love, which is transcendence, nirvana, agape, whatever you want to call it. It’s not about attachment.
  • fstrickl
    fstrickl Posts: 883 Member
    Love isn’t a feeling.
    Love is an action.
    Sometimes it’s hard.
    Sometimes it’s easy.

    Like the band Star says “hold on when you get love and let go when you give it”.
  • scratchmyTwitch
    scratchmyTwitch Posts: 218 Member
    fstrickl wrote: »
    Love isn’t a feeling.
    Love is an action.
    Sometimes it’s hard.
    Sometimes it’s easy.

    Like the band Star says “hold on when you get love and let go when you give it”.

    If this is true - and maybe it is - then it only requires two or more willing participants and the specifics of who they are don’t matter all that much. You can just love the one you’re with.
  • scratchmyTwitch
    scratchmyTwitch Posts: 218 Member
    scratchmyTwitch wrote: »
    fstrickl wrote: »
    Love isn’t a feeling.
    Love is an action.
    Sometimes it’s hard.
    Sometimes it’s easy.

    Like the band Star says “hold on when you get love and let go when you give it”.

    If this is true - and maybe it is - then it only requires two or more willing participants and the specifics of who they are don’t matter all that much. You can just love the one you’re with.
    But if it’s true, and I think it might be, it’s sad to me. Because it would be lovely to have a fire and desire and connectedness that drives the necessary work. It would be lovely to really FEEL.
  • fstrickl
    fstrickl Posts: 883 Member
    edited December 2020
    scratchmyTwitch wrote: »
    scratchmyTwitch wrote: »
    fstrickl wrote: »
    Love isn’t a feeling.
    Love is an action.
    Sometimes it’s hard.
    Sometimes it’s easy.

    Like the band Star says “hold on when you get love and let go when you give it”.

    If this is true - and maybe it is - then it only requires two or more willing participants and the specifics of who they are don’t matter all that much. You can just love the one you’re with.
    But if it’s true, and I think it might be, it’s sad to me. Because it would be lovely to have a fire and desire and connectedness that drives the necessary work. It would be lovely to really FEEL.

    I’m also transcending the notion of romantic love. To only define love in terms between two people cheapens what love is. I think we can only focus on the love we give, and like everything else, it’s a practise. You need to practise it every day (just like making healthy food choices) in order to become someone who shows love to those all around them. Even the ones it is uncomfortable to do so with. (Note: loving others does not mean allowing yourself to be walked on).

    I’m also one of those people that is distrustful of ~feelings~ but wishes I wasn’t. So yeah feeling love (whatever that is, serotonin) all the time would be nice, but I think the practise of it is beautiful in its own way.
  • scratchmyTwitch
    scratchmyTwitch Posts: 218 Member
    edited December 2020
    fstrickl wrote: »
    scratchmyTwitch wrote: »
    scratchmyTwitch wrote: »
    fstrickl wrote: »
    Love isn’t a feeling.
    Love is an action.
    Sometimes it’s hard.
    Sometimes it’s easy.

    Like the band Star says “hold on when you get love and let go when you give it”.

    If this is true - and maybe it is - then it only requires two or more willing participants and the specifics of who they are don’t matter all that much. You can just love the one you’re with.
    But if it’s true, and I think it might be, it’s sad to me. Because it would be lovely to have a fire and desire and connectedness that drives the necessary work. It would be lovely to really FEEL.

    I’m also transcending the notion of romantic love. To only define love in terms between two people cheapens what love is. I think we can only focus on the love we give, and like everything else, it’s a practise. You need to practise it every day (just like making healthy food choices) in order to become someone who shows love to those all around them. Even the ones it is uncomfortable to do so with. (Note: loving others does not mean allowing yourself to be walked on).
    Yes, I was raised with the idea that love is service. And that in a good relationship both parties put each other’s needs ahead of their own. If they both do this, the relationship should be equitable.

    I can’t say it isn’t true but I can say that it doesn’t necessarily bring happiness. I do often wish I could believe something else.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    aChuisle_moChroi wrote: »
    There is nothing beyond the purest love, which is transcendence, nirvana, agape, whatever you want to call it. It’s not about attachment.

    I see that you too have enjoyed the combination burrito special at Taco Cabana.

    "Purest Love" pretty much sums it up, right?
  • GabiV125
    GabiV125 Posts: 3,128 Member
    Ok, found the soul mate and all that, but in a couple decades he kinda misplaced the armor and the white horse, and my golden aura is at best frizzy, shredded and a poopy brown. No euphoria and no regrets.
    To answer the question, I don’t know what’s beyond, because I’m not done yet.
  • fstrickl
    fstrickl Posts: 883 Member
    GabiV125 wrote: »
    Ok, found the soul mate and all that, but in a couple decades he kinda misplaced the armor and the white horse, and my golden aura is at best frizzy, shredded and a poopy brown. No euphoria and no regrets.
    To answer the question, I don’t know what’s beyond, because I’m not done yet.

    I like that, makes life seem so much more of an adventure!

    @scratchmyTwitch I feel ya on the feeling part. 💛
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    northviewvintage wrote: »
    Somewhere between a 5 and 6, maybe? <3
    7639159i4s6t.jpg

    Pretty sure I'm permanently between a 7 and 8 for all things, concurrently.
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    KHMcG wrote: »
    Love is not about you.
    Happiness is an emotion. Fleeting at best.
    Joy is a state of being.

    To truly love someone you must be capable of intimacy. Intamacy comes in many forms. Physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual etc. For two people to be truly intimate is to be vulnerable and reveal yourself to the other. I you don't know who you are you cannot reveal yourself to another. If can't discern who you are you will not know another. Each must in turn be willing to sacrifice thier desires and dreams to fulfill the other's needs. This vulnerability requires trust and strength of character when the other fails. And they will.

    Joy is the state when you "know" each other and you are choosing to love each other anyways. Happiness is when you align and it feels great in the moment. A good conversation, a fantastic decision, a wonderful activity, a romantic moment.

    So...what's the exact opposite of all that? I think that's what I'm in. :/

    There are so many definitions, meanings, interpretations of love; and many times infatuation/lust makes us think we're in love when we're definitely not.
    But beyond love? I'll never experience that because I don't feel I've truly experienced real love. Real infatuation maybe. And real lust definitely. :blush:
  • ythannah
    ythannah Posts: 4,371 Member
    KosmosKitten wrote: »
    ythannah wrote: »
    KosmosKitten wrote: »
    It is part of the New Age movement, but I think some particularly narcissistic New Age types found the concept appealing and adopted it as part of their arsenal of tactics to disarm potential lovers/victims. It was used on me at one point and I've heard from other narcissistic partner survivors that it has been used on them. :grimace:

    My narcissist used "kindred spirits". Same deal. Convey unique and somewhat cosmic affinity.

    When I think of love beyond the personal interactional level it's probably along the lines of agape. That's still love though.

    Ugh, mine too! Do we know the same weirdo??? :unamused:

    They're ALL the same weirdo underneath the phony mystique, we're just not supposed to figure that out.
  • CacoEther
    CacoEther Posts: 2,465 Member
    @MaltedTea wrote: »
    So, I find love everywhere and in everything. My friends and family have stopped making fun of the fact I exclaim "Romantic! 😍" in response to just about any interaction between any two or more people.

    Love, to me, is easily attainable and all encompassing. You've always had a firm grasp of it even when you thought you were void of it.

    Beyond that would be... multifaceted, unencumbered and untethered joy which allows you, and others you relate with, to experience the feeling equally. Shooting from the hip here so I dunno 🤷🏿‍♀️

    I'm just out here in the world getting ready to meet my Future Husband aka The Last Love of My Life (who will necessarily be encumbered for at least a few years - or decades - until my cufflink issue subsides...maybe)

    You make me smile. I love your energy and outlook on life. I’d love to be the man who sweeps you off your feet but

    alas

    I own no cufflinks 😪
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    edited December 2020
    @ReenieHJ You are loved here. Every. Single. Day.

    We are more than internet strangers. We are friends. We share more with others here than we do our own families. There are all kinds of emotional entanglements. You are loved, I can assure you of that. Reality bites and sux and blows and sux and blows and it sux and blows.

    Enjoy the love that is shared here. All we have are words and let those words wash all over you. Let it rain down love in here each and every day. Take what you need from a bunch of different sources and give yourself permission to do your own thinking. Do not compare your life with anyone else. Do. Not. Do. It.

    I have been through hail on earth with many difficult life situations and one of those was murder of a family member. A young mother taken too soon by her own husband. Babies left behind. Life ain't easy for any of us. If we really had it all going on do you think we would have this much time every single day? No, we would not.
    We would be so busy enjoying our perfect lives we would not have time for forums and all of the rest of this stuff.
    When it comes to life it is a level playing field. We all suffer equally but in different ways.

    Enjoy your life and wring everything out of it that you can. To hail with the disagree button. To hail with making others feel small or less than. You are my Romy and I am your Michelle. We are going to have a good time whether you like it or not. Much love, Romy. Reenie.
    Bossy Mossy

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PNe5AvInRCQ

    Let this wash down over you.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfJWqjoekow

  • rcl6
    rcl6 Posts: 84 Member
    @ReenieHJ
    Thanks for that reply💕. I was hesitant to post. It’s comforting to know I’m not the only one who thinks like me.
  • KickassAmazon76
    KickassAmazon76 Posts: 4,678 Member
    rcl6 wrote: »
    @ReenieHJ
    Thanks for that reply💕. I was hesitant to post. It’s comforting to know I’m not the only one who thinks like me.

    I can't think of any love on earth that is as unconditional and pure as a dog's love. ❤️
  • ythannah
    ythannah Posts: 4,371 Member
    CacoEther wrote: »
    I think the ideal love is when someone gives you freedom.

    Not necessarily freedom to roam or whatever might seem implied there. I mean freedom from judgment. Freedom from control/manipulation. From shaming and jealousy. The freedom to be yourself and do what you want.

    All while wanting to be there with you, not holding you back but matching your enthusiasm and making every experience that much more enjoyable

    This is beautiful.

    I honestly thought I had found exactly that once. Then it turned out he had been cheating throughout the entire relationship.

    So, yeah... dogs. And, depending on flavour variety, that sugar-free instant pudding thing might work too
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    edited December 2020
    Diatonic12 wrote: »
    @ReenieHJ You are loved here. Every. Single. Day.

    We are more than internet strangers. We are friends. We share more with others here than we do our own families. There are all kinds of emotional entanglements. You are loved, I can assure you of that. Reality bites and sux and blows and sux and blows and it sux and blows.

    Enjoy the love that is shared here. All we have are words and let those words wash all over you. Let it rain down love in here each and every day. Take what you need from a bunch of different sources and give yourself permission to do your own thinking. Do not compare your life with anyone else. Do. Not. Do. It.

    I have been through hail on earth with many difficult life situations and one of those was murder of a family member. A young mother taken too soon by her own husband. Babies left behind. Life ain't easy for any of us. If we really had it all going on do you think we would have this much time every single day? No, we would not.
    We would be so busy enjoying our perfect lives we would not have time for forums and all of the rest of this stuff.
    When it comes to life it is a level playing field. We all suffer equally but in different ways.

    Enjoy your life and wring everything out of it that you can. To hail with the disagree button. To hail with making others feel small or less than. You are my Romy and I am your Michelle. We are going to have a good time whether you like it or not. Much love, Romy. Reenie.
    Bossy Mossy

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PNe5AvInRCQ

    Let this wash down over you.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfJWqjoekow

    Well dang Diatonic, if that isn't just about the sweetest thing I've heard(ok read) in awhile!! Thank you for that.
    <3<3
    It is true what I said about dog love though. :) I trust them with my feelings. And that, to me, is very important in any long lasting relationship. I've been married for 42 years, separated for 12 of those years but back together and I still don't trust him with my feelings. I trust him in many other ways but can only tell him so much. :/ And I think Cacoether hit on it when she mentioned freedom from judgement. Where there is judgement, your true self never comes out; you can't be who you were meant to be.
    We've become room mates.
    And that's enough personal info for today. :)
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    Side note, I have GOT to watch that movie soon, Diatonic; I've never seen it and it looks funny as hell. :)

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