When it's not working...

trudijoy

..and despite the fact that the last two weeks have been messy (hospitalised parent, busiest couple weeks at work) I've only blown out at the weekends, and I know I need to go with what feels right atm, and I haven't actually gained any weight just not lost more....

Why do I feel so useless and guilty, like such a failure?

AmyRhubarb

If you come through the craziness of life without gaining, I'd say it's working. Life happens - not every week is going to be perfect, but maintaining through it all is a win in my book. Some weeks (heck, some months) will be better than others, but you roll with the punches, make the best choices and stay on track as much as possible.

cmriverside

Sounds like you're really hard on yourself.


You're at a healthy weight, you have some stress, you may or may not have eaten a little more. So?

Give yourself a break, life isn't so regimented that there is no room for things to throw us off our plans. That would be terrible to always know what is going to happen next.

herblackwings39

You're 3 kg or roughly 6 lbs from goal and you're not gaining weight with all the stress you're under. I say give yourself more credit.

trudijoy

You're 3 kg or roughly 6 lbs from goal and you're not gaining weight with all the stress you're under. I say give yourself more credit.

that's not my final goal, my final goal is 8kg away. But yeah isn't stress meant to make you lose weight? I'm not normally a stress eater but being at my parents place the last two weekends with dad being sick has blown my usual plan

trudijoy

Sounds like you're really hard on yourself.

Yeah I am. It's the only way to achieve things

trudijoy

If you come through the craziness of life without gaining, I'd say it's working. Life happens - not every week is going to be perfect, but maintaining through it all is a win in my book. Some weeks (heck, some months) will be better than others, but you roll with the punches, make the best choices and stay on track as much as possible.

I'm trying, it's just super frustrating me today x

herblackwings39

You're 3 kg or roughly 6 lbs from goal and you're not gaining weight with all the stress you're under. I say give yourself more credit.

that's not my final goal, my final goal is 8kg away. But yeah isn't stress meant to make you lose weight? I'm not normally a stress eater but being at my parents place the last two weekends with dad being sick has blown my usual plan

It really depends on not only the person, but also the source of the stress. When I'm work stressed I may not feel like eating, but let someone in my family get ill and I'll eat like there's no tomorrow. I have no clue what the difference is in my head, but there is one at least for me.

trudijoy

You're 3 kg or roughly 6 lbs from goal and you're not gaining weight with all the stress you're under. I say give yourself more credit.

that's not my final goal, my final goal is 8kg away. But yeah isn't stress meant to make you lose weight? I'm not normally a stress eater but being at my parents place the last two weekends with dad being sick has blown my usual plan

It really depends on not only the person, but also the source of the stress. When I'm work stressed I may not feel like eating, but let someone in my family get ill and I'll eat like there's no tomorrow. I have no clue what the difference is in my head, but there is one at least for me.

In the past stress has triggered my self starve ED so maybe that's at least one positive, I haven't gone down the usual path :S

AndyBloot

If you can show me a person who is perfect and sticks to the plan 100% of the time
You will be showing me a person who has a serious personality disorder :-P

Stocks rise and fall/ house prices rise and fall/ savings rise and fall
And so it is with weight loss/ fitness
As long as your trajectory is upward towards your goals, the ebbs and flows of getting there are irrelevant

Nothing is gained by being hard on yourself
This just sets you up for failure by feeling crap about yourself
And from what I can see, you have absolutely nothing to feel crap about
And everything to feel proud of

having said that, it is bloody frustrating when reward for effort seems non existent
And you can seem to be working hard and exhausting yourself for no apparent gains
Or to have those gains negated by life's hiccups

But remember that goals are long term and plenty of things happen that will derail them - that's life
Get back on track when you can, congratulate yourself on surviving so well, and then continue on as usual
You know you can do it - you've been proving it to yourself all along
Time to start giving yourself some credit

trudijoy

If you can show me a person who is perfect and sticks to the plan 100% of the time
You will be showing me a person who has a serious personality disorder :-P

Stocks rise and fall/ house prices rise and fall/ savings rise and fall
And so it is with weight loss/ fitness
As long as your trajectory is upward towards your goals, the ebbs and flows of getting there are irrelevant

Nothing is gained by being hard on yourself
This just sets you up for failure by feeling crap about yourself
And from what I can see, you have absolutely nothing to feel crap about
And everything to feel proud of

having said that, it is bloody frustrating when reward for effort seems non existent
And you can seem to be working hard and exhausting yourself for no apparent gains
Or to have those gains negated by life's hiccups

But remember that goals are long term and plenty of things happen that will derail them - that's life
Get back on track when you can, congratulate yourself on surviving so well, and then continue on as usual
You know you can do it - you've been proving it to yourself all along
Time to start giving yourself some credit

Thanks...this just feels like it should be under control